I know my blog is enthusiastic and exciting sometimes figuring out my own dilemmas, but I promise that Im not trying to have fun and that Im not picking and choosing a style of writing based on my audience or for a particular age group. I think based on my disability and what I have learned these are good forewarning lessons, on taking good care of your health, and what can result from experimentation, or drinking or drug use how that can affect your grades or reputation, to always take as prescribed. As for cocaine I have never promoted “cocaine bear “ the movie, I picked up on it only because I have a crazy diagnosis and based on my size and being a blogger online, Im sure it seems interesting based on a very special friendship that Ive been able to salvage and maintain, means that Im responding on a good note, and just like I am connected to a very important story, that also never makes me immune from how others are made to feel from a story, therefore stories of overcoming and positive messages, means that if there was a struggle to not let that struggle happen again, and if there is an issue of being known, make sure that I am known in the positive, and not to allow for anything more to made a big deal of how I was hurt or since then another has apologized for and tried to resume a relationship with me. I think on the basis of our conversations being threatened based on his mood, being favored over my own, based on how I have responded when Im experiencing mental illness, I have never shouted online before about anyone or anything in my life, man or woman, or group or anything racial, therefore, that was a first time experience shouting online and being upset and what about, which doesn’t make sense based on those things not being my issue, and not paying attention closely to anyone who I was made to sound like my weight loss is because of someone who is thin be discredited as though I don’t recognize a positive influence and accuse me of not being respectful or speaking inappropriate to someone who is a professional, I think I was appropriate, and I think I did my best to show that I respect this person, and while on meds, did my best to introduce myself, so that’s as far as the conversation went. So having this person hurt me, makes me feel hurt as though I will be someone who will upset someone who is going by him and misreading me, and that’s a side I cant win, and a side that Im not arguing, so on the basis of me being blamed for a website that was taken down before shooting in Texas, I still took responsibility for the fact that I should not be nude online and that was hurtful and untrue, so whether me appearing nude convinced anyone that I was not feminine or intelligent or someone to not love, I never made that declaration to anyone, that I should not or don’t deserve love on any basis. That was his choice. Therefore everything else occurring is transpiring from the fact that I am either known and respected and its not about me, or I am known and no one is influenced by me and this conversation is occurring on the basis of discussing a loss, so to bring up now, is not relevant to this relationship online which failed on the basis of my diagnosis upsetting, would be insulting to any other loss, which should not be determined based on my value or the value of my identity or photos and any offense alleged that I have not committed toward anyone, any human being, not online, not in private. Therefore if the issue is simply talking to people, that’s not cheating, so I did not wrong him or hurt his mental health, I respect that this person was older and spoke proper and from Texas, unfortunately I was told not to talk to this person, and because this person was upset with me was recommended to block him, therefore his anger toward me, was not a wellness that was shared elsewhere anywhere or not given to him at the time by choice or preference, but based on my mental health or being hurt, so when you get attacked as though your condition is purposeful, that’s you being punished as though you say things inappropriate. Therefore the basis for judging a person as inappropropriate will be by if they get voices, what is going well, then what does not go well, so that’s not preferential, and no one is being talked down, and a different condition existing elsewhere away from messaging or online, I don’t have a bad feeling on any of my social media accounts, and I don’t have any bad feelings with anyone on messenger, for any reason, and I don’t choose to make this legal battle a featured timeline in terms of when I feel okay or don’t feel okay, to make anything about me doing anything wrong. So this is relevant on the basis that more gun violence is occurring in Texas, so based on this pen pal being in Texas, people want to know whether attacking me for not being close with him has anything to do with my condition, I have only noticed that being made to feel suicidal, he seems like the only person Im made to contact on the basis of him being well and me not being well, so I don’t understand why that’s done to me, when I did not offend him, and I did not criticize his sexuality or post anything negative about him, and handled all his screaming and threats alone without the police’s help, and he made a change and got well eventually. So this is why on the basis of me complaining of a shooting occurring after he posted photos and embarrassed me online for a year, suffering, not a big deal to anyone else for some reason, but painful and hurtful to me, Im assuming that the State of Texas, is of concern in terms of whether I have forgiven him or whether there is an exiting problem between us, there is not, therefore not saving conversations is on the basis of people reading and taking his side and hurting me and calling me names, so now that we are not talking and on block, what can Texas do, to not allow a person who helped me to look bad or make me look bad, or pair us as though I belong with someone or am not with someone on the basis of age or exposure, and on what terms should he not be made made at me, or Texas, would be since he is your citizen, that would mean that I would have to get along with him, and that’s to say that what I went through isn’t real, or accuse me of complaining about someone not bothering me, to say that I have a tiff with someone in Texas, who was the only person who was able to talk to me, with disability, therefore it wasn’t a vulgar story, and he was happy for me when I improved and worked, so if he is being used a person in common for blame to an incident, to say that me connected is in common to blame, to argue that this pen pal relationship is a factor in common being used to apply to other shootings, to ask me whether there is a mass shooting on the basis of someone from Texas loving me, accuse me of not being worth loving, or wrongfully accuse me of being devalued, or missassociating me to any shooting, treat me like I don’t have vulnerabilities or freedoms in life, are not put in jeopardy or not argued or spoken to on the basis of any guilt perceived by not attaching and combing everything, would be wrong to do.

05-15-23