Someone notified me that today is the Anniversary of Nicole Simpson’s Death, she was best friends with my Mother, and how I met Sydney while she was jogging in the neighborhood, asked my Brother “Do you have a little sister.” I think I did my best to write online, work, and go to law school, and I’m sorry if for any reason, I’m not in a place in life well enough to tell stories or speak on the subject. Sometimes you have to fight your battles on your own, without anyone you know, or any deceased from being harmed by anything that is not about them as people, but about me.

I think the Case has always been a sensitive subject and so public, that even my childhood was protected from the public or news, and being a best-friend was a role in life I was privileged to be in life. I would have never expected for me to get mental health issues that would prevent me from being well enough to work or see my friends, and that was a place in life I was looking forward to reconnecting. I think all the mental health issues do, is make me less competent as a source, and less valuable as a professional, you would think to be successful, parents would be proud, and it’s sad that I was not able to achieve that for myself, and be careful not to make things overly about who I know, if it’s my own struggle, voices deal with those repercussions separately.

I’m sorry I’m not doing well, I’m sorry I didn’t finish my JD, I’m sorry that I just reconnected with Sydney Simpson in recent years just a text here and there on holidays or to share news, and recently reconnected with my ex-boyfriends, doesn’t mean I ever planned on getting sick, but sometimes what you go through in life keeps you away from the one’s you love, and how the memory of you can be ruined, along with your reputation and value, based on the quality of your schooling, degrees, places of employment, friendships, phone contacts, emails, medical care, Facebook, associations, ex-pen pals, ex-Bosses, you know I was never treated poorly by anyone, and it was always easy to make friends. I’m just having difficulty with looking bad, being sued, and getting sick again for no reason, and get voices, and talking about it doesn’t help. You know everyone who knows OJ, and then see’s me online, is only cute and helpful for so long, before your life can be made about pills “anti-psychotics” and I think once you are labeled “psychotic” that doesn’t mean its okay to tantrum, hit my head, commit suicide, shout, fight, or do anything aggressive in life, living life is with blessings and permission is how you move forward. Maybe it wasn’t clear what punishment is like, walking everywhere, no car, you get places in life sometimes its not your fault, and you get your life back, upon taking those small steps, making those friendships, and that’s how you move forward, listening to others, not always about my advice, my quotes, my campaign, my story, my political understanding, it’s a story with details intended to help others, not cause anyone sickness, or use my condition to discuss parent figures in my life is inappropriate. I think voices occur when you’re alone, Invega is to cure hearing voices and hitting my head, that’s what bed rest is for, working on Invega, means after rest able to get a job paid as a paralegal, I think losing my Dad made me cry everyday for a year while he was dying and was difficult, it took me so long to get back to normal and get job, and that’s no one’s fault.

So on this day, forget about all the things you don’t want to hear, forget about all the reasons people qualify to speak online, or represent a subject, and do your best to be thoughtful, and respect one another as human beings, be grateful for your lives, not get too worried about what I was like when my life was ruined, or make a big deal about going to the hospital, my condition shouldn’t worry anyone. I know I’m of value, I’m not offending anyone, or inappropriate. I’m not schizophrenic but was treated put on meds as though I had schizophrenia and that is the medicine I was put on for a year or more. I can’t change how I was hurt, all I have to do is do my best, and live life, so that I can reconnect and blogging is a space to help others not talk about mental illness, psychosis, symptoms, or share life stories or be blamed for my own mental health. My mental health is about me it’s not about anyone else. I think as a blogger I should be able to speak freely on subjects without harm to others or myself, is a tough full time job for me. I’m sorry for whatever reasons misunderstood, I’m sorry for whatever reasons I was bullied, and I’m sorry if for any reason, anything is not clear or voices is a condition that bothers anyone, or can’t be solved in public or by therapy or treatment, know that I write to the government, I’m not scared of anyone, I need to go to tech school, and yes my privacy is a big deal, and please respect life is built in a way that’s meant to last not about any story or person guided.