Email to all people who knew me closely, recent contacts in life while being sabotaged by an online bully who keeps coming around then insulting me and telling me things to stick to my head so that I don’t feel good and pretends to be loving when I need to focus after hating on me and create a false website shown to 8 million people to trend: “pervert” and “schizophrenia” I’m not alive to be hospitalized and I don’t deserve to be treated as sick I don’t care who you love or don’t love me or what your peace is it’s not my peace to suffer be punished for what you think is my fault if you think a shooting is my fault then you report that to the police why you think my identity computer or blog is the reason why someone died got sick or shot people.

Until then I have every right to speak when I’m well and it’s not one’s job to attack me punish me or charge me for other things they hear and then treat me like they have to act like no one knows me or everyone does or treat me like I’m desperate or need help then $hit on my face over voices like I’m trash or dirty no you are! Dont tell me to go to the hospital and treat me like I’m mentally ill. You get paid to care if not care if you don’t care then don’t help me if you don’t care, and will sue everyone for not helping me and not being chill and for making me not feel good to put problems in me. Take it to court! It’s not okay for everyone to allow for someone to hurt me and to continue to hurt me as though I hurt him I’m on a ton of meds I don’t have the energy for loving relationships and have to figure out how to work stay well make money be happy and blog responsibly online it’s not any doctors job to read and criticize me then then talk to me like I’m full of $hit or lie. If that’s what you think then this post is going to the US Supreme Court so you can stop treating me like you’re with the people and I’m not or take the side of any man who doesn’t need me who attacked me on what ex’s basis they consider unwanted or harassment whats harassment is being brainwashed to think nothings is wrong and for something to go wrong why should I be made to be asleep how does that solve anything and then to add to that stopped as a patient told to go to a psychiatric institution for what for working on Invega. Taken off Invega. What gives you the right to take the side of someone who molested me then trashed me online because I didn’t feel like taking photos, how does that persons love give him the right to declare me devalued or schizophenic goods my mind my face and my brain as sharp as they come and that’s not genetic that’s called studying and doing the work and not needing help or therapy from anyone what gives you the right to tell me there is something wrong with me? Don’t you think I can tell when something is wrong with me and identify that myself not need a pen pal or anyone to describe what being me feels like?

I’m going to keep writing to the US Supreme Court everyone had an opportunity and no one took my side therefore I will complain directly to the court why my emergency was not yours. I can handle a joke I don’t care what makes people feel good clearly inappropriate jokes about me they think I can’t handle people feeling good about not being me or making fun of me and trying to blame me for shootings because they think my concerns are obtuse. Well I’m tired of going by others who then constantly push for a term to call me “pervert” I will not have sex for the rest of my life I will not talk to Todd and I will only work because it is not clear the basis for being over it or treating me like I’m taking things anywhere I don’t belong. I belong in a job I did my best as a blogger I cannot handle the pressure and responsibility of pleasing everyone and all the criticism or politics over who is therapist and what blogging is I’m not taking away business how dare anyone criticize what’s working for me. What’s not working for me is sex and nudity and feminity that turns people toward attacking me like I’m gay on the inside and I’m tired of punching my head to cover for a Snapchat joke I don’t care that Barack became president how does that affect me I didn’t even vote I was focused on going to law school and I didn’t vote this mayoral race. I will not vote for the rest of my life because it’s you guys that need to adjust not me not worry about my health if people are gonna take it to a place of blame then I will talk to scotus to report the issues on going through my things in common to imitate “photo: pill on tongue” in my computer and in the news: George Floyd (my first boyfriend George Nelson boxing instructor Floyd a triplet) and please stop calling me pervert so I punch my head without a bag to punch to treat me as someone trained to fight who fights themselves no it’s people going through my things and fighting me and trying to blame me like there’s something in my computer that’s wrong I did all the work how dare anyone attack me as learning off anyone in life I provide online and I either blend in or I don’t I either stand out respected or not respected because people have money and nothings a big deal to them because no one is watching them trying to manipulate them hurt their feelings and cause them to be alienated in life not believed I didn’t deserve the nude website that was completely dishonest and rude make fun of my struggle in life and no woman deserves to be trashed online I don’t care if it’s not a big deal to a regular woman I’m a real human being that they attack privately to them share symptoms then put on meds like it’s okay for people to attack me and blame my condition is not chaotic I’m not out here preventing others from thriving I work hard Im not out here having an easy life I could punch my head commit suicide and self-harm but I don’t! and if that’s what makes people not care about me then why am I treated like I don’t care about others it’s people dont care about me and ignore me. Then I will take care of myself and not have faith in anyone but myself as I was before I was made to believe in people I love who then reject me like they found out something or saw my face I’m not fraud my face was ugly by hacking attacking my brain trying to change my writing to focus on stupid issues then pretending to be government to speak through me as though I’m a robot I am no one’s robot no one is qualified to speak for me no one knows me all they see is other peoples reactions and that’s not fair to me to put me down I’m not the one who’s psychotic it’s people don’t care about me & don’t need me so I blog I blog because that is where I fell smart wanted. I’m tired of the public demeanor affecting my family and their disappointment of me I changed my face bought all new clothes and graduated and that’s how it was treated to put me down to lift women up is not how you empower women by hurting any woman period!

Cerebral Application

I get anxious when alone I feel bullied I get made fun of online I always report to police or courts if ever I’m worried about something or if someone has hurt me unfortunately I’m not fun enough sexually so people treat me as a guy and gay and men ignore me like I have problems or am talking to the wrong person get dropped from care like psychiatrists and therapist treated as guilty because someone posted nude photos of me online and they tell me to have sex with myself and to me that causes me mental illness to be characterized as gay if I don’t do myself I’m smart if I do myself I sound stupid I get voices and I can’t arrive to clarify get treated as stupid or grose. 

I would self harm hit my head when I got voices or if my phone or computer would not work if I have an issue it becomes an issue if I cannot solve or fix the issue myself which is why I need to study to get stuck listening to voices all day or be put on meds sedentary. Accused of not making sense or being sick minded or perverted. And I’m not I’m able to have sex date and work this is because my body is fat and my face doesn’t show up the same in photos my face changes and I don’t know why, I was once prescribed cogentin and gabapentin. People give up on me in real life when I’m doing well like dating or working money seems to be the issue and having trouble picking a career path and blogging does not earn income. 

Writing when upset or leaving voicemails upset or having problems that cannot be solved or fixed having issues that meds or people cannot help me with and not feeling good under pressure to lose confidence being ignored in life.