Love is something that happens for you maybe 3-4 times in your life, when you completely open you life and your heart to someone, and they get to know you, unabashed and proud of you, and feel strong by you, there will be only few men in your life, who will completely give themselves to you, and those will be the men who come to love you in life, they will never forget you, and theyre the type of men who will come back into your life, they will always remember you. Love is a feeling of everything being okay and being at peace, it’s the rare gift in life of getting to sleep next to someone, and be at peace with another. Its being in the comfort of the arms of someone who loves you, respects you, wants whats best for you, and it’s the kind of feeling that one another feels protected by, reassured by, that’s the strength found in love, its when the odds are against you in life, at least you have eachother.

Im not someone who dates, and who has dated causally since being in serious relationships, so that’s a different commitment that love and a long term relationship, you will know whether its long term when you get there, so theres no need to worry, plan, or get out of whack over the status of your relationship, you will know when you have those moments of peace together, that it is meant for the long term, otherwise, if you are not achieving those moments, continue to work on yourself until one another is able to achieve that peace on their own. Love is someone who thinks about you all the time, it’s the people who protect you in life, are the people who think about you. No spirituality second guessing about things, those are the people who are looking out for you in life, so if you ever feel like youre at a lost, or things are getting out of control and lifes a nightmare, be thankful for those people in life, who are holding steady in their own lives, it would be a blessing if they thought about you for a minute.

Having good thoughts about yourself and others, is necessary for love, it’s the space that others want to be invited to, it’s the aspect of life, that if you have not been out in the world socializing or have not experienced yet, don’t know what all that happiness and glitz is about, its about love, its about mutual satisfaction of the day being here, from which all can be proud, it’s a moment of arrival that people who are present and in tune with one another, share a similar sentiment, that at least we are here, at least things are okay, and at least we have one another to go by in life. That’s the type of quiet peace and respect that you should get when you are in love, you recognize one anothers drives in life, and willingness to be there for one another, and you let people be independent of you, those are the people who shine, who don’t feel nailed down to concepts, or people in life or ideas, who are allowed to be blessed in the day however it comes, and be at peace knowing they are here, to protect that feeling.

So what is love? Love is a feeling that you give willingly, you know where it comes from “the heart” you aren’t afraid of it being taken or used by another, and you know that that feeling will return to you. Love is the feeling that returns to you upon remembering its worth, and it’s the feelings that return to you in life that make you who you are today, tomorrow, and the next day, and paint a picture of what your yesterday, and past looked like, always view life through the lens of love, it would be a shame to remember your life as composed of anything else than it was up until this point. Usually during the points we are alone, we forget how our lives were made, how they were shaped, and what our lives are about, and you wont know what feeling is lost “love” until it is gone from your life, so who’s choice is that? What types of love are healthy love and what types of love are unhealthy relationships, we hear about his all the time toxic people, toxic relationships. Im not someone who puts people in categories, just see it as the way I see it, someone fighting you who you don’t have a problem with is toxic, and according to my life, whos responsibility is it to cure who is being “toxic” toward you, it would be my responsibility to cure whos being toxic to me and if I don’t cure whos toxic to me and they attack me then that’s whats considered “my fault” when someone is toxic toward you, blaming you for “asking for it” or appearing in a way that’s “toxic to them.” I don’t think any attraction in life is toxic, if you are alive, you felt good, you saw a picture, you met another life, that’s not toxic, that’s meeting someone and getting to know someone, and maybe not all people are worth getting to know in life, and maybe it doesn’t matter who you know in life, is the lesson, that “Im not special” according to the courts that’s “Ive not been through a lot” … that “Ive not been raped” or that “Ive not struggled” that’s the courts who think “you’ve got money” “you’ve got a nice home” “you have a legal education” well you know what if I didn’t go to law school Id have a masters in sociology doing Teach for America I was asked to apply, so you know what my life would have otherwise looked like, would be a teacher, research writer.

Recently Ive been dating and confused over who I should date (I stopped dating because of this lawsuit, so going by who texts me, and chose), and its becoming more and more clear on the basis of hooking up (who to stay with, and not start over with anyone else), whos most interested in me, and who to date, you know you cant force things to happen that aren’t happening, and you cant make conversation happen when things are tough, so this is a good first lesson, on how long it takes for things to be good again which are now May 1^st, 2023, that’s how much we went through as a Country and that’s how long it took to start talking again, without being scared, how long it took for us to hear each other again, and not be scared, and how long it took for us to recognize that we don’t want to lose any more people than necessary to start appreciating life again and who is here. So what is love, its recognizing what you have, and not being afraid to be there for others, its usually those who are well who are able to help those, without love or who need love, those are the people who work day in an day out for others, and also those who are picked such as myself to be in loving relationships or hooking up, you have to be somewhere in life, to be trusted, and you have to be somewhere in life to make another feel appreciated, and that’s what love is appreciation for who you are now, who you were, what you have to do for yourself and others today, and what to live for for tomorrow, it’s the feeling that you don’t give up on, not yourself, and hopefully there are some people out there too who you wont give up on, that’s what love is for, it’s a feeling that keeps you going in life.