Today I had court. In the midst of everything, I still have court, perhaps everything happens for a reason. The topics as of recently have been serious enough that I guess it helps to be in court at the moment, if anything needed to be brought up now would be the time. So I am lucky to be given the chance to stay home, work on my mental health, and continue to not contact who it is I was being sued by. That’s the limit to fantasy, the moment that you are rudely awaken to a different truth, and to me that’s lawsuit, you think you are in love or cared for, that someone has gotten to know you, and feeling supported, to experiencing a sudden loss in support. Which could mean any number of things, but to focus less on what’s wrong with you, and to just improve is the answer, to listen. Whether you agree or disagree, once someone complains, that’s it. There is nothing that you can do to defend yourself, it’s this person’s wishes against your own, and that’s who wins in life. A hard lesson to learn, and in a public way face scrutiny, but hope that by not talking to anyone, if not for the rest of my life, just plain stay away, and focus on my writing, books, and blog, things can get better. -This is when medical care works best, when it’s not something you can openly talk about with anyone, this is when confidentiality matters, when you cannot trust others, to manage or deal with your information in a mature and professional way, is when to not be so trusting, and when to not divulge sensitive information about yourself or others, is how to protect yourself and others.

Court: Required to go to AA meetings and provide proof get a card signed, and go to therapy and psychiatry and obtain letters from all my doctors who are taking care of me. Work on “impulsivity.”