Today was a really bad day that set me back in my recovery mental health wise working on staying well writing well and instead of not being able to sleep and under pressure in need of a med turned into me punching my head and falling over crying and that’s what being told to go to jail feels like giving up. It’s hard for me to accept “what’s not a big deal” based on not being allowed to be well or talk to anyone, the solution isn’t being famous or publishing a book you call stupid or a bad idea or easy money or not and solution it’s about accepting punishment without disappointing who supports me and that’s the lesson in being helped in life and doing better. Why would I ever suffer from an issue I’ve caused or speak to offend anyone who relates or has been exposed to who collected photos of me, isnt about being handcuffed at the police station sounding mentally ill, it’s about blaming me as though events leading up to a shooting were in my control or not in my control accuse me of not writing or relapse or unmedicated not responding properly to dislike or terms and issues spoken to on X. It’s not about me hurting people or lying using stats to pretend I can help or accuse me of being offensive to Brady speakers or highlighting mental health as a concern reported it’s about accusing me of acting lying masking not disclosing saying things wrong convincing improper reject or cheat or destroy or am not hot or special appreciative dangerous on messenger taking risks, it’s about in what ways can I help as someone who did her best to be uplifting and live up to her potential graduate aware to have mental health issues hospitalized more make me offensive to victims of crime or accuse me of making up solutions or using names that don’t work or are stupid focus points related to Fashion or attendance isn’t my story or being weird or dressed nice it’s about accusing me of committing suicide and resenting anyone everyone helped me it was incredibly difficult to talk to anyone I recognize how getting sick or being hospitalized is traumatic to anyone who knows me.

Re: Reading David Hogg’s article in a magazine sent to me by Fast Company.