It took me 4 years dealing with something in private to get a job be present spend time with family be forgiven lose the privilege the blog, make amends, date again, stop dating due to voices, text with replies text saying things wrong be supported, allowed to messaged with court going well, to be alone based on being hurt again which I’m not sure how long it will take to consistently be well again, in spite of exposure which makes me uncomfortable to be anywhere hard to just be, worth submitting in writing and by now vagina photo taken down, open about voices and losses in a way I take responsibility for being misunderstood or writing a post anyone interpreted me as triggering any sensitive issue accuse me of not being high profile in good standing in public not paranoid or threatened …. Everyone’s trying to help me I’m sorry if I got hurt again and anyone thinks “it’s not a big deal” I’m sorry I can’t date right now based on being unstable meds no meds in treatment court or not. I’m sorry my openness and writing a book on battling schizophrenia was not appreciated instead unclear how calling me – isn’t very hurtful untrue. I tried emailing I tried working in public I went back to emailing shared an email and called delusional which hurt my feelings and in the end I have to accept who made me look bad what texts I lost respect over focus on the accusations work hard to be who I am not be considered a person capable of harming anyone not especially see two websites and all my photos not value being proper, in so many ways his comments show how I have lost in life and maybe that’s why I keep getting sick and having difficulty recovering and I’ve spoken briefly on what stupid or offensive could look like will continue to do my best, no matter who I’m talking to or what type of life I’m in, but I know that people have been through so much okay with things that we have all made so much progress overtime glad to be here all have lives and jobs people to focus on, please don’t compare me, no one can afford to be lied to or disappointed in life that’s not what I represent in life someone who considers a take or should be punished over who wins or beat me up he appears to be winning and punished for 4 mean messages, I can’t afford to make mistakes follow my heart speak the truth be fair I’m not physically capable of submitting court forms or lawsuits on my own it’s too much pressure and there’s delays takes me a long time to move, is not a threat or discouragement to “the people” “the public” him or anyone I know (welcoming me back happy to see me knowing me thinking positively of me or learning of something bad online I have to do my best anyways).

So the conclusion is I was open about diagnoses I improved I got two jobs I tried to date can’t date because of mental health reasons I’m too many meds, tried to help everyone, am still getting my feelings hurt, people are at peace with whichever diagnoses, I will have to deal with whatever voices or anger is directed toward me, so my best. And improve. And sometimes being open on subjects or making mistakes doesn’t mean I’m going to feel good making sure no one’s mad at me and maybe I have to accept people want a better life for me to work a job I can now be employed have not given up, show I am focused on my mental health and sobriety by writing, and trust what needs to get done I’ll be able to do no matter how long it takes for me fix myself improve explain things change be positive back off stay home be forgiven not end up in jail stop messaging show up to court again and one day maybe date or work again but it’s okay to be where I am right now need to go to therapy to discuss my worries or calling goals and problems occurring in life I want to be a better person so I can be an advocate and don’t want to be bullied called mentally ill and hope that I can study fit the bar or get research certificates and get through right now no matter what anyone believes is none of my business I want life to go on I did my very best, you can’t be well everyday respected have the exact solution that describes the disturbance occurring overall isn’t my value down or up by guy etc or naked trust that things should work out and no destruction is okay, it’s unfortunate so much is needed from me to prevent voices or make sure I’m not bothering anyone be clear on hurtful terms being on meds not make a big deal about why dating is hard for me, I’m sure where I am in life will get better when I work hard to be well again and I’m sure any reason I’m not feeling well or being bullied is about whether or not I can improve so the right thing.