Here forward: If I say not feeling well taking a writing break or send a medical update under personal update please don’t be offended by breaks I clearly am working hard to make up for anything you think is my fault. I’m sorry. -I can be serious until things are better! Preservation = everyone minus me (+).

Life goes on people have other things to think about there can be positive perspective question peace no sense of peace anger justified or not a push to call me offensive revisit a hate website accuse me of actually being those things consider it true for no one to know why my diagnosis was changed based on the political climate or how life is occurring believe I’m in a good place or didn’t speak intelligently in a psychiatrist appointment the lesson is I got to be helped and treated if I’m getting voices hated or or sued and the Judge is in a better place than me not punishing me, maybe that’s how things should be and wasn’t wrong for me to just be alone not talk to anyone. I can’t even talk about making any effort to be on an app had great experiences helpful and maybe being single is how I’m judged maybe I’m not empathized with over voices and that’s what ruins all my relationships it’s too late to change or worry what’s recorded or how I’m being graded in life what other people think matter, I’ve never misunderstood punishment as something happening I have choices or control over what happens to me that’s not my job to be as strong as a police officer just a concern who I’m connected to and if no system of connecting is approved then being alone is the solution to not have fun take breaks or ask for leniency or hire hospital as to go light on me as though I’m ever being treated for a place I’m in I put myself in like now after posting a lot for 3 days twice. I accept when things end people are at peace like the Judge not hard on me catching me messaging given the benefit of the doubt, to prove myself not let every moment of peace or light hearted ness be punished to just be alone I have a lot to focus on if I want to help others need to stay well do not view suicide as a joke or know how it happens only my own experience and should be in control of my limits that maybe writing a lot instead of meds or texting didn’t show how long it takes for me to open up and help myself. I wouldn’t try if I wasn’t going to make it back to wellness. And I wouldn’t be online with secrets or unaffected by anyone passing let alone belief circulate calling me pervert pedophile accuse me of offending survivors of a case they’re related to bring up my childhood visiting Neverland Ranch accuse me of having problems in common or over medicated in common to anyone prosecuted for inappropriate relationships with minors. It’s not about race that’s not peace no humor fixes crime (if I’m the one who wrote lists of crimes to figure things out started paying attention why would now be any different or consider this a bad time to have these discussions) not accuse me of sex crimes or beat me up accuse me of triggering or blame me for work product you consider against me or for victims suddenly view me as a “sex offender” calling me offensive inappropriate schizophrenic …. Maybe I can do a public service and be clear on what I take seriously and being able to figure this out on my own without anyone needing to care or get involved be explained to court or accuse me of misreading anyone as mad at me or change my life from nice to me accuse me of being hurtful or not fit to be present in meetings with celebrities don’t accuse me of walking around life stupid Judge mistake my wellness as offensive or environmental then TAKE everything away you can delete everything and not appreciate 6 days of writing or 2-4 bad texts typos not making sense or sounding mentally ill. You know life goes on seeing the good in others and if that’s how I am why should I live life judged as the person who’s alive that explains why people didn’t make it or accuse me of being sad or sick or not preventative. Dear Judge I can accept you’re done with me and getting what you wanted and I can accept he’s hurting me and not punished, I can accept viewing blogging as a waste of time not acknowledge I love writing, and I can accept being alone …. I worked hard to reconnect ….. losing everything simply means prove myself again, if people are settled one way I can change them ….. and if I’m going through a lot I can’t date instead of disliking a car conversation and freezing me at dinner, because I explained to my Mom why I can’t date (with disability how much everyone’s been through with experience dating independent explained you need to be in a place where you are excited to see eachother proud one another made it), and maybe writing a lot and being alone not allowed to talk to anyone is punishment for what the Judge is unsure if I’m sure is being mean to me as though I’m stupid or have a job I don’t deserve or suddenly sees death in common now that my Dad and OJ neglect to appreciate all my previous statements giving me a hard time over how my writing is used against me, I don’t have to change anything I’ve said to win, I’m not selfish, if my needs come last then I will be the last to smile take a break if I get voices means they won’t let up now’s not a good time to rest not helpful to “angry” voices.