Don’t be ashamed by your mental health, if you haven’t met them yet, there are many people like you who find themselves in better places in life, able to talk about the periods in life when their thinking wasn’t the best, or they weren’t the most positive, or had issues with confidence. I’m one of them. Although my blog may be successful that doesn’t mean that I’m always feeling up and confident that’s something I need to constantly work on.

Self-esteem goes hand in hand with shame. It’s how we feel about ourselves. It’s how other people make us feel about ourselves. “Shame can be a trauma response that protects you from others. However, you can learn to share and process your shame to free yourself from it.” When it comes to shame and self-esteem, “When a client experiences shame, they live in constant fear of being rejected. And they become trapped in the avoidance strategies they create to escape the pain.” [1] Focus on the positive. “Instead of spending your time feeling shame for not measuring up to your or anyone else’s standards, focus on all of your accomplishments and achievements. You’ll see that you have lots to be proud of and that you offer real value to the world and to yourself.” [2]

Here are some tips for dealing with shame:

• Accept your mistakes: Take responsibility for what you’ve done and forgive yourself.
• Talk to someone: Talking about your feelings with a trusted friend or partner can help you put your feelings into perspective.
• Practice self-compassion: Be kind to yourself and remember that everyone makes mistakes.
• Challenge your thoughts: Question negative thoughts and reframe them into positive ones.
• Practice mindfulness: Notice your thoughts and don’t react to them.
• Focus on the present: Try to move forward and focus on the future instead of dwelling on the past.
• Find an outlet: Find an activity that makes you feel good about yourself, like writing.
• Seek support: A support network can help you feel a sense of belonging and provide an outlet to talk things out.
• Consider therapy: Compassion-focused therapy (CFT) can help people who struggle with shame and self-criticism. [3]

Reference:

[1] https://www.nicabm.com/program/a1-shame-fb2/?del=gad.1742.shame2.allext&network=g&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=20355159119&ad_group_id=153906776849&utm_term=toxic%20shame&utm_content=665190560824&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwx4O4BhAnEiwA42SbVGoqddq7W3njDZO9kvoRFn3AlXA4ztlUQP_eFpYgUcSfSPA4L5L4HBoCFHwQAvD_BwE

[2] https://www.wikihow.com/Let-Go-of-Shame-and-Build-Self-Esteem#:~:text=Focus%20on%20the%20positive.,the%20world%20and%20to%20yourself.

[3] https://www.google.com/search?q=shame+life+advice&sca_esv=5bf89746afc258fb&source=hp&ei=Rcv9ZtzXDO25kPIP4obK8As&iflsig=AL9hbdgAAAAAZv3ZVcpcukzhX5VR-9fpLCiIhdQM1W6X&ved=0ahUKEwicjqO34fCIAxXtHEQIHWKDEr4Q4dUDCBg&uact=5&oq=shame+life+advice&gs_lp=Egdnd3Mtd2l6IhFzaGFtZSBsaWZlIGFkdmljZTIFECEYoAEyBRAhGKABMgUQIRigATIFECEYnwVI2zdQAFjvNnADeACQAQCYAfQDoAGVFaoBDDE1LjIuMS4wLjEuMbgBA8gBAPgBAZgCF6AC7BXCAgcQABiABBgNwgIGEAAYDRgewgIIEAAYBRgNGB7CAgcQIRigARgKwgIKEAAYBRgNGB4YD8ICDBAAGAUYChgNGB4YD8ICCxAAGIAEGIYDGIoFwgIFEAAYgATCAgYQABgWGB7CAgUQLhiABMICCxAuGIAEGMcBGK8BwgILEC4YgAQYsQMYgwHCAggQABiABBixA8ICCxAAGIAEGLEDGIMBwgIIEC4YgAQYsQPCAgcQLhiABBgKwgIHEAAYgAQYCsICCBAAGBYYHhgPwgIMEC4Y0QMYFhjHARgemAMAkgcKMTcuMy4xLjAuMqAH7oUB&sclient=gws-wiz