I lost data, after the first time I opened up is when my website was being hacked and noticed my drafts and published posts were being changed and duplicated without my permission, and moved, as a result, of this happening to me, I decided to delete all 36 posts written on a 3 day writing bender, instead of keeping my work, that was written with long headings. Basically in those posts, which I only have the title to now on my Activity Log on WordPress, was identifying things that I recognize and sharing things that I have learned in the process of being online. I wasn’t getting voices, it was quiet for 3 days, and didn’t take my night meds, and was very therapeutic to just open up and write, which doesn’t happen very often, not even now. I wouldn’t say that deleting is best for my mental health, to work so hard on typing something, and lose it is very unlike me. It’s not good for my mental health, to also have emails have been deleted which would be the automatic blog posts sent by email if you sign up for newsletters, which is very upsetting too. I think to just do my best here forward to improve, and to discontinue talking to someone who is insistent on aggravating me and saying things to me mean and hurtful, I have a heart condition, and it’s very aggravating to have someone hurt you and expose you and get voices, intolerant of me, based on things that he says or shows or use what he thinks to build a team against me, and Im not online, for anyone to go against me, war overseas or not, that’s not what my mental health is for, to make a joke of me being online and being helpful, or make fun of me fighting for myself in writing, and taking it down, it’s not okay to cause me pain and suffering, or give me a hard time over a suicide attempt recently after he published those photos, and it takes awhile to regroup, and move forward, and maybe scolding him for causing me suicide, was misunderstood as though my attitude is poor compared to him. I think in reading my work, there is a lot to benefit from hearing from me, I don’t think ever in the 10 years of being online I have ever flipped out or been in fight mode, that’s very unlike me, sometimes you don’t get what you deserve in life, sometimes making a research for hate website is misunderstood as testing my odds in life, and Im assuming that this fan site has already put me at risk of harm, if people are already fighting me and giving me voices, and changing the content of my blog, prosecutorial toward me, insulting toward me, and that’s really not my job in life, to be alive and work so hard to share my story and be there for everyone, and to suddenly decide to change my focus to a disorder or a disease that I don’t have, which in turn has allowed for people to be combative toward me, while I suffer in silence, and that’s not fair to me, or any of the work that Ive produced, and refuse to be this person online, that someone can just read and pick and choose and try to gather an army of people against me in life, I really don’t have to fight and argue and defend myself had this person not publically write a poor review of who I am as a person, and decide to make people think its okay to hate me or give me a hard time, while Im alone, doesn’t reflect what life is about, who I am about, isn’t the reality of what my life is like around people, or present around others, and is unfair for me to suffer or change my tone or diagnoses, by using strategies to work against my health, and fight me outside of a court setting, or decide to punish me outside of a court setting, or to give me a hard time while filing a restraining order which would have helped, since things have gotten worse since the last time I went to court, and that’s not a difficulty that I feel okay sharing about or be made fun of for, to hear my writing, and then have these unexplained moments of hardship ridiculed, or not be able to determine from where its coming from, or by who is being used to cause harm to me, is very unnerving and threatening.