Things won’t get better fighting or not allow for a valid effort to explain difficulties being no one’s fault that is not code permission or reasons ability court given or taken away mean I’m allowed to quit or not helping everyone ruin my story fight me and overall lose to terms or losses blame for everything and on top of everything not stay well given a hard time if sick or causing pain or discomfort difficulty to others means anyone’s peace is about me or accuse me of being able to handle court where no one talks to me continue to observe me as offensive be fought or lose to insults I make no excuses for voices can do my best to lose everything based on what I’m too late to repair even if it’s who I am too late to be who I was it’s nothing anyone’s said controlling a happy ending for men while causing me of being offensive has made clear to never date again not because I’m mentally ill or want the wrong things in life or in a place in life to date or have sex or have goals easily ruined about making me unhappy or empathized with as far as I’m concerned when you’ve done wrong it’s hard to be helped you have to accept everyone who loves and cares for you gives you chances in life let no one’s life if emergency or condition or vulnerability accuse me of hurting someone’s faith I never blamed or suffered in ways made of issue any hate website seeking compassion or be accused of insincerity or fault I think life helps you of you earn it and don’t get punished I think I spent many years figuring out how to stay well stick to some system things can better if I choose to get well be normal don’t let myself get hurt I think it’s also possible to hurt by things you can’t prove and voices is something no one’s responsibility I now view as what’s interpreted negatively and years in treatment time disabled at peace misunderstand treatment court or jail or reality or voices or being fought and losing as fought to signify how much pain or suffering I should endure to be proven wrong if I can’t keep up with a DA and I’m too late to be loved and constantly blamed as going nuts for no reason it’s not why is it difficult to talk to a person again who is nice to me promises to not be mean confuse conversation or dating love or condition as ways to prove my losses are my fault I think I’m doing my best I think I’m every way I’m responsible if I change not loved stopped not believed sadden anyone not respect difficulty not continuing to fight and recite a word in a permanent way not hurtful damaging or offensive I’m not changing my diagnosis I can either write or I can’t I’m either loved or blamed so at no time well am I not focused on what’s important misunderstanding treatment I think it’s not safe for me to live life talk about life make mistakes not be good enough not be believed hurt work hard to improve to be helped not use alcohol or sex or obesity as excuse to be unclear on what I should be hurt by or question my own story or way of life pick up on anything judge people l nice to lose my life or get hurt listening be punished improve or get sick again using meds or dishonest attendance in AA not apart of I’m sad however I tried to talk about he Judge in public wasn’t good enough improving attending AA not drinking get help do my best to not fight with someone threaten me with my own information or accuse me of hurting anyone who loves me accusing anyone I think it’s clear if life is game I’m losing or being helped and it’s too late or improper to blog of blamed for everything constantly offended by any difficult subject address accuse me of letting difficulty continue concerned about my own innocence or ability to stay well, I did my best whatever is declared wrong with me unfit rejected prosecuted punished for delayed not happening is what the attorney general is for or force me to accept calling my love offensive or inappropriate an imagined loss or heartbreak make fun of all the moments I’m devastated crying and still be concerned with justice my hand in life recordings photos solution campaign played stupid caught watched studied found guilty is nothing in my control and maybe these a permanent ways that remind me to be alone stay away from everyone not talk to anyone recognize the expectation to be high get the point of looking bad or mistreat me as offended not going to make it unclear on why the Judge sent me to AA decide to change my story from earning respect or expect me to speak for anyone who cannot help me continue to accuse me of being a threat read all my conversations reject me disable me then accuse me of not overcoming the severity of seriousness a hate website caused or discontinued blogging. Maybe in every way you could not accept what I sounded like is who I’m losing to in life and I need to be alone not be fought a lose make a game out of fighting me proving me wrong or declare solution or world peace at stake or communicating tampering make fun of my memory if someone’s fighting me and I lose I lose if I don’t fight and stop writing that’s better than fighting for no reason stealing my peace and accuse my analysis or timing as destructive or disturbing …. Instead of not caring if I’m hurt or respect trying to talk about things redirect delays in modeling or website not taken down continue to cause mental illness imagined or no big deal no one saw or let the reality be vocalized that everyone’s doing well nice to me be about not accepting my stages in life or place in life …. Maybe you will never respect me be inspired by me protected by me think everything’s my fault not need my advice and continue to reject me and hurt my feelings in every way it’s so decided to make fun of disability breakups self harm or suicide the worst thing I ever did was talk about life in a way that being alone accepting upsets as being my fault or acceptance of anger toward me mean it’s okay to accuse me of offending anyone. The job interview just emailed me back.