We have entered a time period of sexual offenses, sexual pasts exposed, overhearing rape in the news, and also have recently experienced momentous opportunities for growth, that far surpass the past’s recognition of finally coming to accept us as we are, mixed. In recent months, well the past 8 years I have struggled on and off with voices, which to me represent a sexual history or past being used against me, to declare me an unwanted connection, it’s unclear at what point should the rejection come from either sex, to denote who is found to be the problem, or benefactor of an interaction.

I think that both should benefit, but in the event it is not honored as witnessed, a non hostile interaction, without concern for race, how a later representation of issues, is made to be declared coming form or reflective from a judgement coming from either side, as the feeling at odds, perpetrated by neither, but used as example, for denying privileges later in life for love and respect from others.

When you are being judged by your past sexual encounters and interactions, you wonder as a woman, will I be rejected if they find out that this person had sex with me, and that becomes the issue of wanting to be attractive or feeling wanted, feeling as though because a person who is not like you, who you are not attracted to, had sex with you, if that’s the person holding you back in life, making you not feel good about yourself, and this is how race becomes and issue and age.

No one wants to be done dirty in life, or later rejected as a consequence of not being respected, or for respect to leave them, and be given to who does them, that’s not fair either. We would hope to represent ourselves, and not be used as a unit to combine with or take from to make another shine, or steal our shine, and this brings up light, and youthfulness and not being used up. It’s a very sensitive subject sex, how it does or does not devalue you, or cause you to not age gracefully or be considered a healthy or viable option for marriage, or companionship later in life.

Even me as someone on meds, I wonder how is sex being used to view me as the reject or possessor of traits considered unwanted, such as diagnosis or bipolar or depression. You wonder in the end, why should you be made to suffer based on who you match with or by who likes you, and why should you be judged based on who touches you or interacts with you, and will never let go of the fact of not feeling good, is how the system presents itself as unfair to a person a woman.

This is a controversial subject, to which no terms clearly identify what the present problem is, with concern for voices, to me voices represent something you are being punished for, it represents how you life is being viewed and being judged by another who exerts a force over your mental health to cause you to not feel good about yourself, whether or not that’s racism, it is a preventable odd in life, to not be mistreated based on sexuality, or who does or does not like you, or whats inferred.

I think by terms whenever a negative term is said, it is inferred as coming to mean that a person is sick, to me a diagnosis should tell you whats wrong with me, without the necessity to bring up terms or include sexuality, or genetic makeup, not especially after COVID and world war 3, I don’t consider that doing a justice to the people as a whole who are mostly concerned with not getting voices that makes them feel bad about themselves, or cause them hurt and sickness.

You then question which race has the right to dominate a conversation on sexuality period, and how untrue would be to call me something, after I have hooked up with black and white people and mixed, which means Im not racist compared to people who only date with specifics or types, that’s whats so mind boggling about voices, why all of a sudden as world wide blogger, should I suffer or for punishment to be sought on the basis of race, likes or words, to me that’s an unjust system that is denying me the privilege of success and feeling good, in an attempt to denominate me under the pressures of an issue not created by me, or reflective of someone elses interpretation of their reality and how they see me fitting within that reality, its not fair to summarize life to statements of words, to decide who to accept or who to deny privilege of being well, liked, or employable, to me there is no solution, if there is a fixated pressure to speak specific words of hate, to make any race win.