While on a break from writing, which I do not intend to be absent the public sphere or be unavailable, is usually something I may receive a random text from someone I know or former pen pal, who can tell whether Im not doing well, checked on to see how Im doing. I was informed while on a blogging break, contacted by a fellow reader who disclosed to me a loss he experienced, the loss of his sister, and fellow reader of my blog, about two years ago. About two years ago 2022 I had recently lost my Father to cancer, underwent treatment for schizophrenia (misdiagnosed) and got my first paid job in law, with a pen pal Todd Spitzer, during which time so much gun violence occurred, that I stopped working, to pursue my career in blogging taking off after trash was thrown outside my work on Robertson, a job location announced on my Instagram and to a nearby real estate reality tv professional.

When I showed my therapist the text, she questioned it and did not believe it was coming from a real person, the person who contacted me mentioned that he saw the fan website making fun of me and showing my vagina and asked me if that was true, stating that both he and his sister are readers of my blog and that she suffered from voices too and died (by suicide) about two year ago (either 2022 or 2023, Ive been blogging since July 2019 everyday and have built two successful websites with analytics to show to my audience following along).

For me its not hard to talk to a stranger or to read a text and to speak back, to me that’s not how you get hurt, even if those ended up ways I suffered from identity theft or bullying, in the end I always have believed and kept faith in a belief that I can be some place so well so put together that I cant or wont be harmed by those kind of people, or able to tell the difference between a real person or someone trying to steal from me, and maybe that will always be a wonder, crime prevention, how can you prevent yourself from being harmed via phone or email. And something Im clearly cognizant of as a blogger or applicant for jobs, or book writer, never anyone pretending to be something they are not, or unwilling to share based on a text I received, something Im thinking about and processing as I am now, no matter how tough things get.

To me it should not matter whether or not I get voices, or self harm, in the hospital, treated, or home blogging, sometimes that’s not the solution for peace punishing a person who is well, or who has a job and telling them that they are sick.

To the same token I am someone who has found success writing quotes and writing blog posts which take about a year to achieve success and a following, and require a constant production of content unique to me and the internet that it is actually read and benefits who is reading.

It’s not until recently that I have been faced with circumstances testing to see whether I am fighting something in public that doesn’t exist or fighting the public or misunderstand a lawsuit to mean something worse than it is, I don’t think in the 8 years of experiencing voices, it was ever anything that interfered with my ability to write and live life and make progress and not continue to suffer, there are many ways to prevent a condition from occurring, and Im sure I have demonstrated with confidence those solutions and have spent more time well publishing online, than days sick, and have certainly been sober the entire time.