Sometimes no matter what you say will ever be good enough in the eyes of comparison, or a decision maker of privilege or wellness, life is not a competition, or a story anyone should win or lose by create political theories on life, to exclude me us my information, or conversations or communications against me. Its my job to keep track of everything on my end, and make sure I keep tabs on any changes made, aware of tampering, aware of how I am to be affected by punishment or lawsuit, mindful of the men supporting men system of ridiculing a woman or rejecting the love or humanity of a woman, considered loosely tongued or foul mouthed, are all the ways you can appear not beautiful, not pretty, not mindful, not recognizing your own privilege or upbringing, an un mindful example of life, how life evolves, an untold story or no value, by virtue of being devalued, or letting every fuck me, or hate me, talk $hit, make fun of me, use the issues of bullying or public speaking against me, judge my recovery or sobriety, health or age, or job type, use anything against me, its not me who is unclear of the damage that is done by hurtful words, or unclear on how racism could or might have affected a treatment of me whether no longer, getting everything right or getting some things wrong. What changes or worsens about you in the face of disrespect or voices that wont stop whether you commit suicide, punch your head, or drink, is not about me once Im getting voices, however they’ve been identified as shared by me changed on google from my therapist saying “these are not your voices” to google saying “these are not your thoughts, is never about me questioning or forecasting a disorder or circumstances or evolution of events occurring in life, dishonestly or with an angle or education that permits me to just say anything, overtime working toward earning trust and respect in the community as requisite to work in public, lose weight, function, live life, survive court, and two hate websites diplomatically, not be punished for contacting Todd Spitzer, or admission to contact, privately admitted to known, or not in public or notify the Judge of the beginnings of an overuse of harming me in favor of others, aware of communications lost during punishment, cell phone broken, being locked out of accounts, not having access to my rank or stats, my website being altered so that no ranking website I used to judge my performance was accessible post lawsuit being filed, is not me lacking awareness or any photography mistake or misuse of trust a person confided in who I do not expose or have a story that’s been articulated in private, but clearly not enough times in public, if the assumption is changing voices from “these are not your voices” recognizing the potential to hear things you don’t say and doesn’t sound like you or your writing, of an unknown person knowing you clearly not coming from the men you have dated, ever make me an unconcerted effort or way of life, or system of acceptance, review, requiring proof of performance, and requiring continued wellness to stay or perform, ever not unclear about what can happen under the influence of alcohol or by what email, at what point things come out difficult or address my limitations in life, as a desperation or untruthful analysis of life thus far, as my love or life has been treated as “voices” which are being used to “be stated online” to defend hate websites to discount mention or argument with voices overtime at no condition or stage of mental clarity or research paper written, did an improvement to my own suffering or private struggle be mended, ever at at any point allowing anyones anger or the use of the “the public” name or corporation or discipline or ability issue, or any unsolicited use of my life or who Ive dated, decide to name on WordPress the name of the son of someone I met on bumble, and again on X, rename a new function a word that sounds like my last job Burg and Brock, about a focus on how my blog posts or recollection of how I dealt with and managed the issue of Hestrin or any nationality ousting someone I love, as untimely reflection in connection to me, ever not clear on what makes people look automatically bad, unfamiliar with my Father in court not represented and losing a home, or OJ in court not represented or being freed from prison, anyone who is spoiled or doesn’t have a JD, making it okay to go by terms or private stories at will or by forced discussion through me, continue to make me not feel okay, accuse me of guilts, continue to not respect how Im managing two hate websites, with lack of concern for why two websites are not online, or being taken down, or why content is not being produced in time that it takes to regroup get well, have access to meds, to overcome voices or do cardio again, whats clear is that when there is dislike and people don’t want you to do things, as connected things will not happen abnd you will be stopped observed, the issue of mentioning the Attorney General did not wish to go to trial and put me in jail unclear of whats coming from me, a not mindful later assessment, of why after 39 years of life, and after so many jobs and so many mass shootings, addressed by me, and by reported memory and calling states and having a solid general awareness for bad happenings in life, with sensitivity to not recreate or allow for suicide or death or substance abuse to occur on a level, not that different, or secretive, or a person who doesn’t do the right thing on their own. I really don’t feel like Im on any team when Im getting voices, clearly whats hidden and new is me fighting voices, after being called so many things while in court and not medical condition is being used against me to disqualify me from a mental health program, clearly means performing, or battling something privately or in public, whoever or whatever dictated by misusing the Attorney Generals observation or government access or tech access to all my accounts, an unfaithful addresses of good moments and terrifying moments, brave moments, intelligent moments, honesty discussion, never made a mess in public of a private issue I was handling with help of an investigator is not with the intent to allow or be subjected to threats that you accuse me of requiring continued notification public or expect me to call 911, or drink, or just end up mentally ill, causing a scene unrelated to any diagnosis or treatments or experience with mental health issues, if its it not about me and about everyone else, then my decision to be home and not date is with respect for my life now analysis reputation let it never be unclear as to whether Im guilty or not or trying to keep up with or keep track of any moment in writing recorded in shared, the best way to live life is being proper if you recognize an issue, report it, if you have an issue with posters suddenly, that was reported to Boulder DA before mass shootings and fires, never anyone who denounced the movie Legally Blonde, suddenly concerned or new to approvals or periods of content going against me, anyone living life suddenly notice don’t notice special or not special with Eminem or not with Eminem, have a story or don’t have a story, bringing others together, or reminder of death or comfort or identifying myself in a room of people brave, clearly not able to speak or write not confident obese, is not about pride or what technologies I do or do not have access to is not my judgment or decision making issue, why WordPress does not show me any stats, with over 50k views to a website that fully launched in the middle of mass shootings leaving a job, going to the ER, seen and sent home, is not about medical care, being dropped as a patient, have a surprising ability to work, or history of “underperforming” or lose track of writing samples, a person who should live hurt, or be accused of dishonoring politics or use of Instagram or twitter some projected personality okay with myself motivated and educated earning followers, suddenly about what has caused a change or executive decision forcing me to remember a date occurring a year before my Father died, or unclear about what love is, or at what point loved again, be in a place now, hurt or “change voices to not existing or delusion” make fun of being supported, then use an improved definition of schizophrenia, accuse me of living life without difficulty challenge or being at rock bottom, or unclear on what hospital is for or being taken off meds and stuck in bed, is a choice I make based on my own comfort lelvel, stability, its never been an issue as sober a person who commonly made mistakes online, an identity issue of a person who is loved, about misusing my mental health or overanalyze, what not being stable or trying to ask for help not knowing whats wrong, a taped list of how I feel on a police station an example of a story or condition of loss “labeled terrorism” or “airplane related crime, plane disappearing” or use of paper or my blog distrust how the world responds in trauma, continue to misindentify me as not working hard or judge me being on my own and staying home, or needing meds, unclear on how to get back to normal, or made to recall every way I have described the experience of voices, as taking me away from love, suddenly wrong or watched being wrong a person you catch or expect me to date move on attend meetings or be social at a time like this, isn’t about using OJ as a system to make fun of me excommunicate me, blame me, accuse me of being unfit or not smart enough to do an attroneys job writing as a paralegal, concerned with credits or a person who lack direction in life, or a choice memorialization of a year in life that’s not ones business or the number of times I ever tried cocaine social or not, are not ways to change my story or excuse others now or prior to sickness as something I should deal with privately a good decision, its not my choice to have to endure so much challenge and issue with bravery not offend or insult anyone Ivy League, intelligent, younger, or older, not a person who says one thing or does anothers, or write one way, or unrecovered person or poor example of a person deserving of publishing a book, constant accuse me of thinking Im something that Im not, its been clear on several occasions how long I waited, how love was lost dating, how Im spoken to as though I need help, or limit interaction to just sex, a person proud of their life and Instagram, someone who gets locked out of a account, and like code is just made, and then make fun of me as though my lifes a joke, or being arrested for no reason, or be wrongfully accuse of not being sober or gone, standing out or pulled over on less meds than Im on now, unclear as to badges kept or returned, drivers licenses sent back to a DMV, lost my passport in a file box, LAX Court House, as settlement told me Im not allowed to travel, the forced me to take down my website, and delete my Twitter, is not about me not recognizing losses insensitive to my own story, a poor decision maker, or hurtful to anyone I love, someone that people know personally, as I was before blogging, and people who do not judge me, which no post public or private, archived or statement, is about creating secrecy about a condition, about accusing me of non-compliance, or not living life to the best of my ability scientifically educated and trained and experienced in dealing with high volume cases, or keeping track of my own value, is not about me misunderstanding anyone who loves me, a person who is gone, or expect me tot speak or share my sobriety in a meeting, while a hate website is up, or my name is in controversy while in court, its not texting Aaron, or being late, or well enough to attend, about strength or demoralization or appearance, its about the point at which life is not about me, and its about everyone else, is not about working hard my whole life to get a high paying job, and sounding stupid on Instagram or by email, a person who cannot control what is coming from them or not strong enough to get voices, and still be able to speak without being accused of being possessed or requiring excuses or medications to deal with every point or every statement disliked or not good enough is clear everytime I get voices, and Im alone, and suddenly discontinue speaking in private, or addressing an issue “anger” that Im not allowing for, nor ignorant of trauma or boastful of the timing of my request have experience or story making anything my fault, or require constant testing and distrust and threat and mention of how a word is ruining my life, is not without mention aware of how everyone I know can be affected by me being hurt, or definitely not someone who is doing their best and asks for help never submitted any report or discuss death or the loss of my ex pen pals Mother after my Father passed away, something I blurted about as a fear means not trusting any system or misunderstanding or illegal connection (connecting to the police or medical care only) a person who by connection or mention as to relevant as to what Ive been accused of people I have known and been invited into their homes, a person with a story, that is not an illegible expression of what happened to Michael Jackson, or OJ Simpson, mean my story or attendance in Neverland not having been interviewed by E news, or formerly by a news company with not accurate televised interviewed approved discussion and asked to speak in response to questions, a person who makes anyone feel unsafe, or a person who has dealt with voices for years, kind enough to share and discuss the topic, until resolution can be found, not about fire experience or work experience or ability or a person anyone should be concerned of what Im capable of or make it okay to accuse me of causing or deleting or upsetting or misusing Petrocelli or story ever make things unclear as to me or mention of me or a person whos recruiter asked me to apply a dream place to work hard to get to work in Century City a goal in life, any type of employment struggle directly related to not finishing my JD, and with no credit or public demonstration of enough information and proof over the years of a continued effort beneficial to the community, not harmful to anyones health, livelihood, or unclear as to who my writing is used to judge me, a person who speaks online, or cant keep track of what they’ve done wrong, all I know is if I am able and strong enough to a manage a threat or conspiracy, Im not someone who goes from doing well, to being put down punished resentful or forgetful or failing to recognize my own strength or inaccurate measure of intelligence of temperament, as related to earth or how devastation is traumatizing having been in jobs, observing reality, having driven to work, interacted with police, having been to the hospital threatened by a nurse told I cant sit somewhere everyone was able to sit there no one else was asked to move, any way to make fun of how hitting my head gets punished or what about punching my head and admission to self harm and being in treatment unclear of a diagnosis, or threatened by a change in definition, don’t know whos hurt me, or report hurtful definitions of a disorder or later confirmation of not having a disorder, confusing science or not help science, or about confusing me, or putting me down, mean when Im doing well, to use voices again, to accuse me of forgetting a condition after its been treated and stops, or a person whos lived offline, with no phone, not blogging, and experienced voices, or unclear about the timing of voices after attending meetings, after hospitalization, put down so far in life, it shouldn’t matter how I was able to get well, and Im not in control, of the number of times you get put down in life, for any basis or any reason, using any tweet or any writing to confirm or be used against you, making anything about anyone else, a person who is handling life, facing distrustful or hurtful voices, a person who just changes or is made to fight voices and experience batlling conditions privately, put online, by him or by me, getting voices anyways, watch all job opportunities, end with me punching my head or any good photos or video, end up in voices returning or punching my head, is not a confirmation or story or lawsuit, or reminder to delete everything Ive written, ruin periods in jobs, accuse me of not being on a team or on a team, or not handling things professionally, all that’s been proven by disrespect, accusing me of fighting a condition for 8 years without any public disturbance or hate or disrupted recovery or treatment undervalued, but about remembering everything Ive said, and clear on whats coming from me, not a person who needs an attorney to keep track of my mental health, or ways my life can work out or not work out, and how much it disappoints me, to not feel good, or be put down, unsupported, and in the end expect me to be in a place where I move on, or work, able to work, not self harm, achieve a prolonged period of sobriety, or prolonged period in court, expect anyone to help me, or overanalyze denying help from anyone, or any life being used to accuse me or my life or my story as being sad or provocative, lacking light, pride, or insincere toward a meeting Ive attended since 2006 or 2011 continuously, clear on vocalizing my own life in a way I don’t blame or put others into distress, and recognize I am not so loved or pathetic or the joke, that allows for continued expectation of writing improvement, popularity, or asking for intolerance toward me, or blame, isn’t about misidentifying my temperament, or about anything that anyone has said period about family or life, a person who was loved, loved again, and clearly in a place more difficult that the average person can tolerate, not causing problems or a person to blame for any fire, did not misspeak or address the improper result of blaming a single person, offer for example to blame me, then accuse me of intolerance or guilt, or lack of education or time working hard an example of patriotism or protecting of mental health, a person who lived life, worked hard to have fun, and can continue to work hard and be alone, until life is good again and people feel better. Is everything I meant by how destructive voices are “that are not me” have been to my health, how predictable the timing of “voice or resumed symptoms” occur when doing well, continue to keep track of the number of times terminology has been addressed publicized by him, how many times hurtful words have been publicized by me, isn’t about audience retention, or court, or mass trauma, or level of expectation for me to be online, or suffer symptoms, publicized that anyone should suddenly be okay with something, require everyone to turn on me and discuss voices in public and watch me fighting bullying in public, to determine any class or education level or gender or value or education level or call anything “street” or any photo “anger” if anything you fail to see life as it was, with a preference to make me look ugly, fat, isolate me, threaten me, continue to not honor or credit any work that I have accomplished toward furthering life a person with a good awareness however insults are now being used against me, isn’t about forcing me to live life watched, accuse me of being famous, or showing up places standing out, or not belonging, a person who gets reported, or is suffering punching my head an insincere relative to an Eminem song and required attendance in a program for several months, considered by a Judge as “not rigorous” enough, an untruthful non acceptance judgment made between professionals to which making fun of me being told something serious, has any relationship to job type or story type, about openly accusing me or making things my fault, suddenly expect Instagram or question being locked out of an account or choosing to delete an account or participation not someone who is living life insulting or the known cause of any loss, I think the more you punish me use me and expect me to write and record or publish online, be disadvantaged, use “The People” or any State, as “all against me” or accuse me of not knowing what life is like, accuse me of needing help, or not clear on how putting me down or forcing me to be a person disabled who asks for help, mean its okay to compare me to the enthusiasm and wellness and proper ness of other people in recovery, use my story or sobriety to be disappointed, or a person required to be in a room, you inaccurately credit the Judge as identifying a concern as to forcing attendance and accusing me of addiction, after meds taken away with a heart condition, means at any point in time Im allowed to say Im not okay with changing my story or being accused, Im not okay with voices, or being called names, Im not okay with improper assessments or diagnosis or writings detailing a condition, you continue to deny me as underserving of respect, you continue to not keep accurate records of every moment well or smart, and you keep being offended by an expectation for me to speak in a way, reflective of a reality or “stopping point” or “symptom discretionary occurrence” mean Im not compliant or unaccepting of disability delays or accuse me of creating a false reality that differs from my actual life, to make everything a restatement of what others have said, and continued dislike of everything I have to say, I think not blogging makes sense if I don’t feel good about myself, not confident, unclear on what being accused feels like, not a person who fighting or offending anyone or improperly addressing the public or doing something wrong, a person who complains who you decide is wrong to not care for anything I have to say, to accuse me of “probably losing if we went to trial” mean Im not familiar with what its like for someone to collect the worst of anything Ive said not to mention now accuse my memory of being poor unclear on how a trial works, maybe the mistakes Ive made have not been recorded online enough times to suddenly decide for me to change and fight in public negative and hurtful terms accuse me of not being worth it or rejected or now not special or a person who is not pretty or resentful or living life threatened. I think I did my best to be loving and work hard and it would be sad for no one to talk to me, work hard to earn a life, then have my life be taken away by court accuse me of living home and being an offender, or accuse me being underserving of care or compassion ruin my life to make up a news story disregard 39 years of life, to accuse me of being shocking to my Facebook friends, or in public to nice people or misuse fans or disclosures against me, accuse me of experiencing conditions in common or turning into something worse or dying a reflection that I mentioned, deciding how life should be represented by me suffering or not having a life, or decide on bullying or court or expect people to care or read, expect me to feel good or help when there is a constant anger or system of disrespect exclusion is to what point does my life being ruined, an easy subject that everyone can handle the OJ Simpson case, and person you just make fun of expect me to walk into rooms, people talking or not talking, lack awareness of my own changed disposition or a person who suffered the consequences of being made fun of in public.