There will be many moments in life, don’t let the worst of it all to define you. I think as of recently I was improving, past an ultimate low point mental health wise (in discussion of terms/words/hateful phrases), and it goes without saying that the opposite or truth posted on hate websites, did not help, and also contributed to the voices that I got, and the resounding fight I got catapulted into, lucky to survive, and be in positive spirits. I don’t think that any feeling is an easy feeling, but I wouldn’t say that writing, is with the intent to make things worse, or speak in a moment, where silence would otherwise be preferred. To me to feel like writing, starts with a thought, and if you have a thought, you can decide to share that thought through writing. To me thinking is for clarity, and the act of writing is to further that feeling, of things being well, and making sure that things are okay. I would say that checking on others, in spite of me not feeling well, shows that I care and have compassion for the patience of others, not intending to let anyone down, living clean and sober. I don’t think that its been easy, but I just want to move forward, and took down all those posts. There will always come a time when you think about everyone overall, and think about my career you know nothing is for nothing, and nothing is just for yourself, usually something that is something is something for more than just one person. So to view my blogging in that way, I may not be famous, or a number one author, or a musician, or a filmmaker, but that doesn’t mean my identity online falls below the standard to just be known and be known in a good way, in the positive. I would say my commitment to high standards throughout my career, is what’s reassuring thing about me. I think other takes on mental health and by rumor and insults, did not really help my mental health, and made periods extremely combative with voices, and tiring. Just do your best. I just want to move forward, having given my best, set all posts to draft, to just accept where I was, and without comparison to where I am now, clarity has been well earned. And my time off medication, working hard, on fixing things, that may have gone wrong, since falling ill, and that its never my intent to worry anyone or end up in the hospital, and as someone who has experience recovering from mental health issues, I don’t also want to be judged by who talks to me, to me that’s not a true measure of my self worth, what other people think of me.