Everyday is an opportunity to start over improve yourself life is not expected to know you console you believe you and may not always know based on the timing of life and by what is provided clear or convinced of any phase of recovery I’m sorry no time off meds on 1 pill a day, or going back on meds, and no doctor visit or public disclosure of hospitalization was good enough period, I work hard to be accepted, and have never made mental health a scary subject or try to normalize conditions you accuse me of ever being sick or at fault. In the end I can accept however losing to bullying amounted to enough communications public to judge me for and can accept that on no level recovered off alcohol time in therapy improvement given the circumstances is good enough or issues very complicated is not an easy job making anything my fault or require me to be wrong to make anyone happy or be anyone’s peace not staying well. I can accept not staying well is my job if I can’t stay well not be online, not apply, not talk to anyone, fix myself, not get hurt, not be made fun of expected to speak wrong shame my battle with voices. It’s not my win when voices are believed to be about others then it’s not my happiness that’s a peace or anyone else’s unhappiness or condition mean I don’t care. I stopped hitting my head, I stopped writing in public, I stopped videos, I stopped modeling, I shared my solutions and beyond that however I lost or suffered lost composure is me doing my best, I can’t change who believes voices or the basis for voices representing issues believed to be wrong with me, life is not always about me or being hurt then losing mentally ill on a level, anything that should happen to tell me l not good enough undeserving or accuse me of mental illness, what’s important is not him winning and calling me mentally ill, am doing my best clear on being alone not talking to anyone it’s about me staying well able not the number of times insulted or meds sobriety or types of voices ever anything I deserve or should get used to, on many levels life is deserving of a reality I don’t feel is okay to constantly single me out, use voices T priest others require constant public admission to voices bring up meds to say I’m wrong he’s write take for granted a day of peace of quiet. I think I lived life good enough to be amazing things I think it’s unfortunate for me to suffer or make hospitalization about anyone but me, respect the privacy of my family, sometimes life is not my fault and life is not better punishing me telling me I’m wrong or being up voices over and over again to do anyone a justice I think life is newly complicated, I don’t consider myself guilty, I tried life with no meds leftover meds, I’m sober I don’t self harm and I’m sorry I can’t always keep up with everyone need to make everything about me of dysfunction or emails etc I’ve come a long way, maybe it’s predictable to make fun of blocks or getting voices and feeling suicidal require me to message who is being used to justify voices and discount support by fans is not opportunity to suddenly change my life to terrible confuse court and the attorney general and an investigator in Texas or a job or my efforts in life not about my face or an uplifting demeanor, at some point it’s time to start appreciating all the people I helped and created excuses for voices all the harm and solution found is not my life I need to change wake up from remember be less than, or accuse me of sharing about being unconscious moved from bed to bed mean I’m dead it means I as alive and me dying is scary not a joke not my fault because I’m not taking risks didn’t say anything wrong. Sometimes you have to accept the days well the enthusiasm present who I am not accuse writing type as by audience letting anyone down of any age is not me rejecting fun of being judgmental it’s about me doing what I feel is right not about different takes on equality use any famous speaker or major trauma in life doesn’t make ugly not beautiful bad luck insensitive false fake not a viable solution a story told is not about me when it’s about voices it’s not about me not liking myself it’s about not deserving disability have been through a lot, it’s concern responsive not too late not lying I’m sorry if the solution is off meds suffering dislike posts after hospital unclear on him not hurting me or question what’s difficult, I don’t think I’m too late have issues require anyone’s help contact his call require me to be encouraged to not blog should know why sharing a photo or my health should fail and be my fault. You can’t hair everyone happy life is lived on levels protected and I assume some routes are accused of having lived hence negative terms. I can’t accept voices but I don’t have to help voices waste meds write online need my privacy in a place to be wrong be subjected to blame. I’m not the one hurting anyone’s life. I’m a good person.