I used to think that having it all meant marriage, family, having kids, and being in good health. But the reality is, not everything is perfect. With mental health nowadays many of us are on medications, learning how to navigate the world on meds can be overwhelming at times. Let alone dating. I never married and I dont have kids, but that doesn’t mean that I dont want to date in the future, leave the door open. Don’t limit yourself simply because of a mental health disorder, or sobriety for that matter, you can and you will overcome your troubles eventually if you do the right things to help you get there, and listen to others. Don’t expect miracles in recovery, if you’re not willing to put the work in, the same goes for mental health issues, keep practicing your CBT, cognitive behavioral, thinking and thought structure. The more structure you add to your thoughts the better off you’ll be. 

Recently was talking to a guy that I dated a few years ago, and thanked him for never judging me, and he goes, I would never do that. Often times our mental health issues leave us feeling insecure about how we look, behave, and see the world, and the truth is with the right people, you can feel apart of again, and not have to be single forever. So maybe there is potential there, for me to move forward, and share my time with someone who is not judging me, and can be there for me.

It’s also been nice to reconnect with old friends too who support me and care about me, and have never rejected me even in my toughest moments have always responded to me. So whether you’re single and they’re married with kids, don’t judge your life as being any less or undeserving of friendships with people in life, don’t sell yourself short in life. Celebrating my 10 month milestone with close friends and family right now is what means the most to me in life and well if that’s the best I can do right now so be it.

So do we need to have it all. I used to think that having a full time job was what I needed to do to be happy and financially secure, but the reality is some of us just can’t make that happen. I think my last job I worked full time as a Legal Assistant/ Legal Secretary, Case Manager, and did great, until I got burnt out, was getting voices at work and that was distracting, usually on my smoke breaks, maybe smoke less, or needed a change in my meds. Why I stopped taking adderrall. 

Years ago I would have never been able to work full time in law, but I worked up the courage and the confidence to apply with the help of a career coach. I kept going, and sometimes thats all it takes, a firm belief in ourselves, that despite our mental health issues, we too are deserving of jobs and a good life. 

According to psychology today “We must figure out what’s important to us and place our energy on those aspects of our lives.” [1] Because you know what, one of the most rewarding projects in my career has been this blog, other than law school. It has allowed me to spread my wings, and reach out to all of you, and build meaningful connections in life, that last a lifetime. Wherever you go from here, know that you are supported and cared for by me and my audience. No one leaves here empty handed, I hope that what is provided, is something that you can take along with you in your journey in life, and be that much stronger in tackling your day or whatever it is that you are struggling with right now. 

References:

[1] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/your-emotional-meter/202309/the-falsehood-of-having-it-all

[2] https://share.google/qOYh9XkFXNm7ch30y