There are typical ways of losing power, in particular if you are someone who suffers from mental health issues, it will feel like you are never right, and always wrong. I promise you that that feeling will go away, so long as you do what you are told, that means following doctors orders. It seems like we can be given good advice and still don’t follow it, hopefully not until its too late, here are a few examples, of typical ways you can lose power early on in your recovery:

• Blaming others for your feelings, feeling like you are the victim.
• Engaging in open conversation about your condition, and feeling ignored.
• Oversharing online, and worse yet facing online bullying.
• Not feeling empathized with, when you share about a difficulty.
• Engaging in argument over treatment of you, not recognizing where you are now.
• Engaging in argument with exes, over whos fault, is what circumstance.
• Frustrating the people trying to help you, trying to get through to you.
• Trying too hard, masking your feelings, with defensiveness.
• Bottling up, and when it hits, not know what your crying about.

Being an open book is one thing, although you yourself may specialize in recovering from your own condition, that also doesn’t make you the specialist in helping to cure whatever symptoms another is enduring in their own lives, stop taking responsibility for how everyone feels about you, and just get better, that would be my best advice. It can be so overwhelming when you are in the early stage of recognizing symptoms and getting treated, while others are voicing frustration or anger toward you, prove them wrong! That means don’t argue about it, and get going, arguing only leads to further isolation, and you can already be feeling like youre alone in this, and I promise you that you are not, we have all faced difficulty at one point or another, when we were feeling less like ourselves, and in an unrecognized state of being, felt like giving up, just to spite whomever it is that is trying to tackle our problems for us, they are your problems, own them, so if you don’t need advice, don’t get your feathers in a bunch, try to stay positive, and trust the process of getting well, that hopefully as you continue to improve so will their perspective of what it is you have gone through, and be met with kinder voices in the future. Its normal to feel like you have to “work harder to get done, and even basic daily tasks feel heavier than usual,” [1] says wired.com. Where are you now? Constantly ask yourself, is what I am feeling true to today, or is this something that upset me in the past, just like any trauma, revisiting those feelings are bound to wind you up again to all the wrong credits, always work with a therapist through your troubles, if you need help identifying whether its someone hurting you, or whether you are hurting yourself thinking about it in that way, then that is something to work through, think of each hurdle as a project, you identify, you mention it to a professional, then you work through it, and don’t expect everything to be healed in one session, its okay if there is some repetition, until you get it right stick to finding solutions for yourself, even if you don’t have the solution for everyone else’s problems, things cant get better, if they only get worse for you, so take care of yourself first. According to this article, “distance,” is one of the top reasons for “self-harm thoughts,” I never really experienced feeling that way, until it happened, and it can be for many reasons, that not only are you not feeling well, but others are not feeling well about you, and that can be a frustrating feeling, I understand, as someone who used to be very social always one of the most popular, and greeted with enthusiasm by all my friends, never did I think I would fall victim to put downs in life, or failures due to mental health reasons, it happens that doesn’t mean that it has to happen again in the same way for you, not if you learn from those experiences and become wiser as a result, for all the times you were hurt, or felt mislead, or powerless, you will get your power back, stay positive, and don’t let anyone convince you that anything is permanent its not, as someone who has been hospitalized 9x, its more about what to do in the event that you are not feeling like yourself, either you cant sleep, you have fallen off schedule with your medications, your not working, you aren’t contacting friends, people have tried to reach out to you and you have found it difficult to talk to people, all of these are signs that you need to talk! I know how hard it is to be thinking something and not want to say anything, out of fear for the diagnosis, you never know, and it shouldn’t matter what meds they put you on, you always have the right to speak up, and to say you know this med isn’t working for me, or I would like a change, you have that right, there is not one solution for all mental health issues we are all different. How I wish there was someone to talk to who was going through the same thing as me, and not feel judged by them, they always say to join a support group, easier said than done. -So how does this blog help? The purpose of this blog is to help anyone who can relate not feel alone, and by the progress I am able to make, hopefully feel inspired to do the same. And even if youre a fly on the wall supporter, or just want to see or hear from me, thank you for visiting, I always wonder on difficult days what that feels like to hear from someone who is struggling, thankfully sharing even the worst of it, has received likes, so that Im thankful for. 

Reference:

[1] https://www.wired.com/story/mental-health-coronavirus-pandemic-tips/