To compensate the time energy and effort of others to worry or figure out for themselves a solution is provided in the form of not holding others liable for harms to me, which means either Im proper and respect how Im feeling fix it, or it becames a situation of make believe blame and insensitivity toward me as though hate is to be directed toward me, you are misunderstood in a good way or a bad way and then there is immaturity and off speaking which usually occurs after you have been hurt or if you are defending yourself against a hurt, not related to what is ongoing, its what is communicated to me that hurts, and whether that’s in retaliation for what they deem coming form my body or mind cannot be corrected by reinforcing a privilege to attack me or my privacy as though something has gone wrong on my end or by my doing, everyone is entitled to a right to privacy and you don’t have to respect or be inspired or okay by others, that’s past hurt, then worry about yourselves. A project is something you work on overtime its not for award you create what you can and you see where you fit to me project means assembled by me overtime, when I could, and worked and improved and good things happened for me all the while reporting to others updates, then there is a perception of sex or crime, and then it becomes inappropriate to talk in private that’s not what privacy is for intensity or reporting that’s what 911 was is for, so excuse my exhaustion when I say I don’t deserve to be hated I have suffered enough and the award recognition is in acknowledgment of my improvements and not making situations worse and that when I am well trying hard things work out whether or not I am suffering or for what reasons known or unknown to me, never addressed or inquired about, left alone, it will only bother upon mentioning that’s how others become when there is crime, its more fun to treat someone as a target for criticism by good fortune assume that one is suffering for what wrong they have done to others, I would never exchange my life body and face for anothers and that’s not what connecting to people is about its about being well and able to be well around others and if you are not well home and in your room, which is where I plan to stay for the next month, another month rest from work, and stick to my schedule I don’t have the energy for processing voices, Im not a group project, my job is to support the independence of others, not to influence or take credit for the wellness of others, everyone can see through their own head they don’t need my head or my body to see clear, that’s your blessing in life, perfect vision, or seeing things light up around you that’s your halo and instinct in life, a halo is taken when another assumes that you body or disability is affecting the good health of others, and it could be by your face energy or structure of your composition in life, or disclosures known about you not admitted to, a disregard for your health, or an assumption that you are in poor health by your head size, face shape, or body, viewed as hurt or gets hurt not positive, when you are healthy and pretty then you are not viewed as a threat that’s only something recent. Therefore because gay was caused to me because I went to West Hollywood meetings where I was comfortable not to hook up and focus on my recovery, and be social make friends, it then became about the privacy of my computer phone and body habits, and I don’t lead a messy or grose looking life, or pretend to be clean online and dirty in private, that’s not how I lead my life, my closet, my belongings, my files, my photos, or computer I value myself and others. I cant explain to you how I got bipolar but once hospitalized it becomes impossible to date and right now is no different painful, and at a loss having worked on myself to bond with Todd that’s not something you can just make between people wellness, its worked on, or you work on yourselves, right now is so demanding and painful I very much wish to get well, therefore when I shine, its not to shine like, or to take away shine or bring criticism to the issues of others, and if immature its my own insecurity with regards to how to approach subjects with truth and honesty and not be made fun of for the conversations I make up with others in private, I think practicing social skills is a great trait, my videos and photos improved, can look normal online now, and not freakish or be accused of looking masculine or weird blame my boyfriends or girlfriends or be hurt as though Im a reject or need to feel rejected to be told incapable of having a child its me trying to live life first Im not trying to be crowned anything in life, or awarded something I don’t deserve to be proven wrong in life, that’s a deadly condition for me to be in in life, to be treated as not American, for a compliment given to another, mistaken. I speak well of others naturally, Im not condescending, I don’t see people as stupid. I think I stare at my feet more than any human being recognize how special being alive is simple. So discrimination is: feel it – speak it – sound tired – jib jab rickety rackety, making it real.