Edit 12-05-22 – Paragraphs 5 and 6

So it’s not too late to make matters clear in the public so no one assumes I’m getting any help or privilege in life and so you understand there is no cover up or set of rules for determining whether my condition or location or work product is related to whether there is a school shooting or not cannot be determined by the courts, not without information to enable them to create for acceptances and welcomed adjustments into the world as they are. It’s too hard to live life accommodating others, events, and things you overhear, at some point what can go right starts with you and it’s not that you are unaffected or don’t have faith in the ability and timing of law enforcement to stand the test of time and make proper decisions, a good sign of the power of the people are when things go right by our own system of indicators to follow in lieu of losses. By now usually let’s you know when things are good enough “confident” or when something is lacking, not to be misunderstood as a piece of anyone to be replaced by any specific identity or belief we all want to do what is right and at different points in life it will either feel right to leave people to their own devices or help and it’s no one’s job to help anyone identified as “harassment” that’s the risk you take in seeking help privately either you arrive put together but that’s not a condition anyone can fix for you … if you have not learned what wellness means you always have time to get well there is no finite system for success in life look at me, from totally gone, no meds can fix me, totally sedentary, struggling to graduate, experimental and social by messenger, rejected, and improved, hurt, and improved, losses, and improved, reports and improved, those are all risks to expose your deepest darkest thoughts and fears that’s not easy to do especially when you are told you are mentally ill and whole that may have not led to any punishments of people I know, it’s better to address a fear then to allow your light in life to be taken or attacked as though it’s a being from which a poor faith is established that’s the beauty in defense, where you are not supported others are, and that’s how people become heroes, which either you recognize or feel threatened by, but that’s life, there will be other moments in life where you will have something important to say and had you not said it that a system would not have been put in place to succeed absent you that’s being the bearer of a good future maybe it’s not for you but we are a Country stronger in numbers that if you can’t get to a better state of mind at least present your best and spare the energy and hearts of anyone relying on you to wow a crowd or make believe life is about something better, the good life isn’t a costume, it’s a 24 hour job of high profile protection where if you don’t feel safe can’t manage a gift then you cannot be put in a position god a gift to be spoken to or connected to, that’s watch Aunt Leslie evolve over 6 years, staying in her room.

Other quick ways to dodge the subject, I actually looked great in a lighter shade of my color ash brown, instead of golden looks yellow, I actually looked pretty in a red tone, my Mom has red hair. And my Uncle. (Back to buying time strategies with your audience please be patient I will figure out and make things better life is not all about hugs and sweet faces it’s a positive trait to appreciate the toughness of others, that’s how some show strength and that’s to be cherished, threatened or not, some have surpassed these wonders in life, I’m just someone who winds up either needing to address or not, no Elon Musk required. Just hope that when things get better the wrong attentions won’t take away from who is hurt and deserves to be with God.

I once said to myself I’ll redo college and law school that’s how determined I am to belong.