When you are focused on doing many things right, when you are pushing yourself for acceptances, and applying via application, and seeking to qualify for positions in life, that doesn’t mean that you immediately get a feeling of your life going to happen, you can visualize upon performing upon acceptance, and that is your proof that you are where you belong, and that you were prepared for the journey, those are the people who get into law school, its not a split decision, you don’t need to know anyone famous, in fact that can cause you to lose focus on the material if you are applying outside matters, that will cause you to not make sense, law school is about understanding material, and being able to comprehend the reasons for things how to apply what you learn and decide what is important, and that’s law school, it requires all of your focus, and all of your effort before applying, it is demanding to take an LSAT and improve your score, and you cannot have anything on your academic record or any problems alcohol or drugs in order to be able to function and take exams and memorize material, you need your brain to work, you also need to be focused on the right things in order to stay well, you cannot attend law school with disability it would be too hard, and if you cannot memorize and cannot read and cannot write then law school will be hard for you, if you cannot figure things out on your own, no one will teach you how to sound, or how to make the material work, that you have to figure out yourself, whether you get it and can apply yourself, or whether you cannot process or cannot function, who is to say how that happens, I think disability occurs when your mind leaves what you are focused on, that is how you fail to be good at what youre doing, when your mind is elsewhere you will not be good at what you are doing, you cannot stay in law school if you cannot attend every class take notes do the reading participate, study for months, read, and gain work experience, that’s interning, its to be paid one day, its intended that you be independent so you can take the bar and be an attorney, that’s privilege.

For me suicide occurs from drinking, dating, argument, confusion, anxiety, pressure, upset, feeling threatened, disconnect, thinking people are communicating to you, feeling emotional, analyzing life as a whole, thinking about everyone, getting back in touch with people. It’s a decision that you make, based on not feeling well, or by what meds you are taking, no one convinces you to commit suicide, no one explains to you how suicide happens, and its not genetic, and its not about other people, its something that you do, when you don’t feel good, and no one explains to you what self-harm is about or why you feel sick, or why you are separated from others, it means there is something wrong with you that cannot be explained to you, so it will not make sense by car apartment education boyfriend life, it will not make sense based on what you read exposed to or think, it will not matter who you know who is in jail, or what a hard story looks like, whatever the causes are for giving up in life, will not be about what you look like or what you think, or what youre wearing, is not about sexuality, or asexuality, or gay in general or by location, whatever makes you give up or be sad no one can explain to you what hard for you to hear, or whats upsetting or hurtful, no  one can explain to you life, or what doesn’t feel good, if you don’t feel good that’s nothing anyone can explain to you, what is your purpose in life, where do you belong, what is wrong, its you decide to stop living life, and on that basis of something hurting, hurt yourself, and that doesn’t explain anything to anyone, no writing, no book, no deposition, no case, no attorneys website, you will later learn that although you may reflect and share your experience no one will care people will think its stupid, or a reflection of something wrong with you and blame you, this is how being called schizophrenic does not solve gun violence, its to call someone something, or to think someone is something to remind you of a shooting to blame a person as though their suicide has any connection to a shooting or a President, to falsely make someone look like they committed suicide over a shooting, when they have already connected and did not connect on the basis of any shooting, known.

What are other forms of suicide, it can be a repetitive behavior of not feeling good, or doing things or speaking in a way that doesn’t make you feel good, if you consistently get sick, and are reminded of anything to feel sick, if you self-harm and cannot solve voices, if you change and are harmed, then what becomes relevant by the changes that you endure, who is being represented by putting you in pain, and in what way does improvement, not explain for what others look like during the course of your life, in what way are you known and related or in what way are you punished and blamed for what other people look like, what does suicide do to your life. Suicide is something that makes people feel bad, they hear the word and they think you have a “plan” or imagination of doing something to yourself, or see self-harm as a reflection of you not liking yourself, or think is for “attention” attention does not solve self-harm, and self-harm is not about attention, Im to myself, I don’t carry myself in a way want to be looked at or stand out and noticed, that’s not what my life looks like and that’s no what self-harm is about, self-harm is not justified by insult or words or “auditory delusion” to say that how I carry myself calls for an attention that is the reason for a voice being heard, that’s not my experience in life offending others, or carrying myself in a way, that’s hard to look at or ignored, or not loved, that’s not my experience in life.

What are medications for, they are for treating a condition to prevent, like physical symptoms “things being too much,” aggravation “things being too much in your head,” upset “things being sad and feeling pain inside your body, commentary not sounding stupid and taking life seriously, medications are to help you be independent, its not that you have problems with others, its so that you can focus and speak well and comfortable with yourself around others. Medications are not for as needed, for someone who has had an experience of suicide, medications are not taken as I feel, its AM and PM same amount, if you are having problems staying well throughout the day, or things being too much at the end of the day, that can interfere with sleep, to be awake, causes you to not be able to sleep, to sleep too much, causes you to do less harder to get going, and to wake up constantly and have nightmares, means that the meds are not allowing you to sleep, and are making you tired, because your body is not allowed to rest, stay asleep. What does it mean for things to go right, feel well, and be at peace, it means that the day is not hard to live, its not hard to function, make meals, the days are not long. Life without thinking being able to think, makes life long, the days long, the hours long, and painful, to be sedentary, it makes you awake with no thoughts, and as a result you get depressed and do less in life, so you have no plans, so you stay stuck in a day, and hope that the next day gets better, while having the same problems, mental health issues, and or voices, voices don’t go away with meds, all they can do is to stop your thinking, so if you are made to think less and do less, it is judged that overactivity is what causes you to have voices, its judged as though you do or say things by impulse or poor decisions, that cause you to not feel good, so to do less and to say less is of benefit to you. No meds can solve any behavior or talking to yourself that’s mentally ill, that’s a choice and either you allow yourself to live an alternate life, or you adjust back to being proper, its only becomes of issue, when you bother people, or when you are struggling or not improving, always have the goal to improve no matter how you get there, there will be weird stages of getting well, when you will not be sure of yourself, do less, not try again, so theres no physical fitness level for being strong enough to get well, its an ability in the mind, to settle, to make sense, to say what is right, to behave and appear proper, and to not be overt or talk or stand out, or model period, usually when you are exposing yourself to let others get to know you that’s a privilege in a permanent form that’s not garbage recording your life that’s a privilege to get to see what someones life looks like.

In what ways does talking like youre giving up, talking about suicide or your experience with it, how does that cause you to get sick again, or convince people to hurt you in that way again, this can be by belief what is said and recorded then becomes known to you or others, then happens again,  on the basis of seeing what you look like or sound like mentally ill to determine what are the causes for you committing suicide, and sometimes that’s not the solution for getting better, to figure out the causes to share about it, and then you get hurt again, and subjects people to being studied, as though you hurt yourself and others got hurt, is something I read in a suicide manual, that there is a lot of blame and ill feelings felt afterward that are hard to repair, and difficult to remind others of. So that’s the lesson in pain and trauma or an experience that cannot be reversed, you will feel sick again thinking about it, you will not make sense talking about it, it will not be believed or be important to know and sound simple or preventable to people, and ultimately when you decide to end your life, people will want to know what you knew about life to make that decision to end your life, and on what basis did you stay well and how and in what way did staying well permit you to work and live a normal life, in what way do mental health or psychiatric issues happen again. I think if you are someone who knows when you don’t feel well, last time you committed suicide, then you know what the physical symptoms are that occur before a suicide occurs so that’s prevention when you know when you need to be checked go to the hospital, on the basis of not feeling well. Overtime if you keep getting sick and going to the hospital, eventually it can become a pattern that you keep getting sick and end up in the hospital or people suggest you go to the hospital if you are sick, that’s because people don’t know why you don’t feel well, and people come to believe that you not feeling well is on the basis of something going wrong for you, either you recognize or don’t, and think that you not feeling well, means that something is failing for you, so on the basis of people not knowing whats wrong with you, or cant help you, may suggest that, and sometimes it helps to go to the hospital to prevent suicide, or if you have a disability that you cant figure out in your head or know whats going wrong, then you have to go to the hospital if you are sick and cannot help yourself, it will not matter what you see, who you know, what you say, what the issues are, drugs, alcohol, lifestyle, mental illness is a condition when you are doing nothing and you don’t know how to help yourself, this makes you do less, hard to do work, meds don’t make you feel good, relationships fail, hard to get a job, things can go wrong for you socially or hooking up wise, and again if you rely on medications to feel good your condition will get worse, because you cant take meds to feel good as needed, you have to take meds the same everyday, and you should stay well the whole day, if you are having reaction problems or interaction issues and experience changes throughout the day difficult, or can sleep, or not at rest, then this can create for difficulty, if you are working hard, or not up to standard, this can cause you to not feel good, not function, cant work, and you suffer become difficult to help, no one can explain to you why you feel sick or what is wrong with you, but the dumber you get the weirder you look and the more overt you seem or desperate, that’s how stupid or obnoxious happens, its you are sick and you don’t know what to do, and you are proper and speaking well, and then you become dumb look weird.