Please excuse my posts last night, in an effort to be clear on a few things Im dealing with personally, not to alarm anyone, and also make clear Im still working on staying sober, and have had a few lapses in judgment recently due to voices, discontinuing writing, which only made things worse. One of the worst ways to vocalize your pains in life, is to come across as sounding mentally ill, and that includes caps lock or cursing, so please accept my apology and write a second draft of the previous post on “when I hear this rhetoric.”

I was watching Fox News last night, before information about the shooter was released a doctor and journalist on TV was already psychoanalyzing a person she knew nothing about, already jumping the gun on mental health issues, and what this person’s mental health issues were “coping skills.” Recently at a doctors appointment, after sharing about voices self-harm and relapsing on alcohol, my Doctor internist who knows me told me that I need help with “coping skills.” So please accept my alarmed reaction to suddenly having an issue, that this person on TV was using to describe a sniper shooter trying to assassinate the former President. At what point will it no longer be appropriate to diagnose, defend, and describe shooters as mentally ill. To me they are fully capable, are not experiencing disability, not on meds, not treated, and violent, using deadly force. This is more than just a diagnosis at play, being a public figure these are conditions that I refuse to represent or be used against me, to claim I have problems, therefore am not part of the solution. I think I am part of the solution, because I get jobs, am hired, am a paralegal, I have friends, Im supported, I take meds, the Judge in my case thinks highly of me and willing to help me and work with me, and please accept my apologies for getting upset at the sudden sound of someone on TV bringing up mental health issues, which we all have now and on meds at least the majority of people, I would think who are reading my blog, and are benefited by hearing from me. If I am the positive influence to a diagnosis that takes lives, I would hope that by saving my own life, and by saving the lives of others, we can change this interchangeable use of “mental health” and not bring it up every time there is a shooting, to describe what a shooters personality is or issue is. How many times are you going to insult the disabled and those with mental health issues on meds, and then take a known violent offender and compare and diagnose them with diseases that regular disabled people like me suffer from “coping skills” a symptom of someone who suffers from self-harm.