It took awhile to be known in a way you can speak freely without crossing over the territory of others in terms of what they have to offer the world and by their stories represent. It gets complicated once people disagree with you, or come to not like you or respect you, no matter what you have said well, that question cannot be reversed, once you are defamed. It becomes a constant struggle to break even with your audience, the other side feeling as though you are speaking without liberty to speak or speaking incorrectly in a way that offends them, that’s when the benefit is not mutual, or when people do not think that they are benefiting from reading your work, or don’t feel the value in hearing what you have to say, that’s when things are at odds. When a solution cannot be made for discomfort and what was done to you, the you become not apart of the solution for others, and that’s when the solution for others becomes about making fun of you in secret, and shaming you as though you are a secret writer who is integrated because of who you are or what you think.

I think all integration requires a certain level of respect and consistency and expectation not a product of failure, it means that you more times than necessary say the right thing and things become better having heard from you, that’s being allowed to speak. A difference is when people don’t feel good by you because they have been told mean things about you, which is what makes someone sick or angry toward you, when they don’t feel good by you, and then take that anger and aggression out on you, because someone else did, to explain for their disgust for you. When this happens to a woman, no matter where or how you started off as, it can make living difficult, when people become angry toward you, or who think that your influence demeanor or approach at life is influencing people in the wrong, is when you get judged for whether or not you are conservative or something else in private unacceptable, and this is what makes people conservative toward you, when they become convinced that there is something off about you, or how you handle life or live life, is something that cannot be watched, or heard about is unacceptable, and this is what makes it difficult for people to like you, know you, trust you, talk to you, want to do business with you, and who become confrontational about your demeanor, your energy, your health, your look, or what youre about. It then becomes about what you take personally, or find insult in, known or not known.

I think before you are known, things are very street, theres a very movement like feel to coming to know someone who is popular online, who does not earn a wage, and who is not credited for their writing, their ideas, how they speak, and what they know, and how they assemble what they know to excuse for the confusion faced by others, who do not know them, and are unsure of whats coming from them or influencing others, and that’s the not so sure about you part of life, when its all by energy, people being done with you, had it with you, frustrated with you, and don’t want to talk to you, its either you have said something of value, or they think that you have said something wrong. And this is how a direct confrontation with violence and shootings occur, when it is not clear who is being blamed for what influence, or what is being made apparent by incident.

Recently I have been keeping to myself and improving, not talking to anyone, and accepting all the new terms and conditions, of me being in question, and that just means to be alone and not to bother anyone, and to let people function without me and try to determine what is said influencing in the wrong or not influencing to integrate and appreciate one another, I can tell you one thing, [it’s hard to speak to issues upon confrontation], directly as it relates to who I am what my corporation says and what my blog is about, then I have to directly [speak to] subject as though it affects me personally, and do my best to show how you should speak when something occurs that does not make you feel good and also does not make others feel good, that’s plain and simple, and naturally not a time for creativity and being jovial and happy, its means you are being faced with the mental illness of [another], that you have to focus on and speak to correct that mental illness, and make sure the mental illness is not being created from what is being integrated or secretly going well for others, in terms of their understanding of what is in life.

This is why I am publishing two books, to officially be an author, who can be available to speak or share about how difficult it is to help others in times of need, and how little is said, even when the times are dramatically wrong, how difficult it is to come up with a way to help others or a system of talking that can improve the outlook to the benefit of those who wish to help others in times of need. Being popular means what everyone can read it and everyone can feel good and a lot of people are interested, because a lot of things that they wish they knew more about is informative should they ever face a difficulty like me when trying to build a blog or a company, know how to go about things so that they can help, so that they wont be hurt, so that they can be protected, so that they wont be questioned, and that’s the difference between being known not known, underground, special, famous, not famous, loved, in love, not matching, not ready, not the same, not what I need, and what makes you look bad.