Right now is about getting well and staying well. From my shoes things can not be worse than they were going into the hospital that’s how little was on my side at the time of being placed in the ER it seems like the more others are involved in your health and the worse you get the less it’s about you and how you’re feeling. So whether you’re getting well for others or yourself always see it as getting help and doing well to not worry yourself or others if that’s what hurt I have to sit with now on month 2 of treatment everyday. I would never submit to continued treatment I didn’t need and while life may be full of hurdles and difficult things to say, the main goal is to make it through treatment go each day signed up for and complete each program. That goes without saying to improve also through blogging, while I can’t go back and change posts published before hospitalization I can always go back and write a more professional and detailed composition to better explain my fears or from my perspective how I’ve felt during times of trauma and devastation what were things that I’ve done to be able to write online and help others and what does asking for permissions in life look like? Writing letters, writing to the courts, staying out of trouble, no complaints, no fighting, avoid controversy, mindful of everyone’s feelings, mindful of stress, life stress, mindful of group goals, mindful of my role online keep educating myself. There’s a lot to keep up with trying to be someone of value in life that helps others, so hopefully I’m not too hard on myself and hopefully others are not too hard on themselves whether its getting to know me in life or get a feel on what’s going on in life and how they can help others and decide for themselves whether I can help them.