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Whats Related? …

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Well now everyone finally knows eachother? Was it as painful of an experience as you thought happened, hopefully not, expecting the worst. We will all come to fully understand the significance of one anothers experiences in life eventually, and hopefully there is more love to pass around than any resentments, carry a lightened load not assume a heavy load was ever intended to be set before us, thats not a positive way of viewing progress.

Many have come so far. So if you stop for a minute to recognize the many transitions we have endured for the betterment of all, hopefully more than one of us will be mindful to be more accepting of the past for what it was, rather than view who is here now make life a painful experience at all.

Its what you remember that counts and for everything that comes up for you upon reading, understanding, or visualizing what it is thats important for you to think, hopefully through blogging have a few less thoughts secondary to the best interest of everyone, who have been waiting for everyone to be okay with where one another is now, and give back strength to those who are still working their way toward more notable positions in society such as: employee, graduate, wife, husband, friend, comrade, date.

We all have our places in life not every place you encounter in life will be cookie cutter perfect, not everyone is prepared for every situation or knows exactly what to do, most of life takes adjustment, so dont be too hard on yourself, if youre not feeling thankful, grateful, happy, it will happen again, but not if you are thinking poorly of yourself or others that makes the learning process that much more arduous, time consuming, lengthy, with all the wrong pronunciations vivid, if it happened it happened, what can you do, there are still moments left in life to be lived, so consider that too.

Always hope for the best. There is a time to pray, and time to mourn, a time to rethink what it is that is going right for everyone, and a time to process, right now is a time to thank God that you are here, that you are living, and hopefully thriving, and not thinking too much to the point of sickness over what if anything has gone wrong and why, not everything in life will make sense perfectly, and sometimes what works best is not in explanations past, but in rationalizing to what effect those understandings will have on the present, what to believe and what to prevent.

Prevention means, to recognize, “individuals who experience adversity from traumatic experiences.” [1] Which can mean all of us or some of us. It doesn’t mean to identify with, to become, to think like, it means because there are people suffering, if you are not suffering, that’s being called upon to do your best to make sure that everything else goes right for you in life, and for the remaining few who are able to take care of everyone at this time, you may not be up top, but everyone matters in the grand scheme of things, trauma is not a portal you get stuck in with anyone, that’s not how to view any trauma or disability in life, be more proud and more forgiving, and more supportive and less analytical, the less you see wrong with a person, the better your overall thinking will become, and the more manageable the problem will seem, if not for you, for them, everyone deserves a little faith, and it starts with you.

You don’t need to kickstart, you don’t need to push yourself, you don’t need to overpower, you don’t need to rise above, you don’t need correct, amend, change, reverse, erase, delete, hide, explain, less is more at a time like this, if everyone is working on making progress themselves, all that anyone will care about is that you are alive and well and hopefully thinking a little less about you and a little more about them.

So what explains all the feelings of withdrawal? Its in uncertainty that one worries how others are doing if not feeling the same as them and while in most cases there is strength in numbers, right now that is being discouraged as a formula for success of everyones health, its okay to make things more about you, but that doesn’t mean not get help if there is something you need help with, just know that all of that instability or insecurity is not just coming from you or from others or from social media or anyone you know, its just a normal reaction to figuring out how to feel better we all have our ways, not limited to actually interacting with others and talking about life, one the more basic ways of feeling better having conversations out loud. 

A few recommendations about “how to be social while social distancing during COVID.”:

“Establish a low-pressure chat environment. …

Share an online-movie night with friends. …

Take your board games digital. …

Have a digital happy hour. …

Start a club that meets online. …

Shift your group workouts to your home. …

Ask for help when you need it.” [2]

Now lets talk about physical symptoms (#stopsuicide). Its been said, “it is common to feel stress symptoms before or after a crisis. Natural and human-caused disasters can have a devastating impact on people’s lives because they sometimes cause physical injury, damage to property, or the loss of a home or place of employment.” [3] Furthermore, “Trauma exposure has particularly pernicious effects on both mental and physical health.” [4]

For example, “Having low or no energy.” [5] I know this has been a problem for me in the past, in the beginning stages of my recovery from self-harm 2017, I attended AA meetings, did the 90 in 90 days which is going to meetings everyday for 90 days and sometimes I went twice a day in the morning, right now its about maintaining the peace, and if its something to be discussed that is off topic with AA recovery then that explains why Im blogging, in a less sensitive environment, that requires you to constantly remember what has gone wrong for you in life, while learning to appreciate what is working for you now in life and how far you have come. I probably should have been there for the phase of graduating and getting a job, unfortunately, I was probably too busy trying to get everything done editing a book, building a website, maintaining steady content production on my website, learning Alexa and distribution, running everyday lost 30 lbs, and manage contact regularly with pen pals of my choice, don’t forget to look for the verified check that’s really important at this time.

You actually cant just talk to anyone, everyone is running on different energy at this time, so just get used to it, learn to be accepting of all people, if youre out of that spell pat yourself on the back you are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel or the rainbow above the stairs I actually saw that and took a picture, there are many signs that things will be okay don’t forget to pay attention to whats around you, and continue to pray and give thanks to all of those who are supporting and caring for those of us struggling or who have lost faith in themselves or a system of trust that they have grown less reliant on for assurances in life, such as the police, who used to protect us, and who has recently lost trust, I used to work as a volunteer paralegal at age 22 for the government and defending them and the LAFD in civil lawsuits, so I can understand what they are going though too as a whole not to be affected in the negative, a lot of good work goes on just not in plain sight, just like we have to be consistent keeping track of our own lives their job maybe a little more difficult at this time to keep up with everyone, since everything seems to be important but maybe only until after discussion realize not beneficial to the direction that others take in life in terms of deciding whether or not to support you on the basis of your connections past, not everyone will appreciate you or your resume, and some might just see everything as a game of charades, to communicate to everyone in a way to make yourself likeable, Ive never had to campaign for myself in life, and have never been concerned with image only started wearing makeup 2015.

I always dress up to the nines for work, that’s my pride, being professional, Ive been wearing ballet flats since 2008 I used to park next to the LA Times, yeah I saw action figures in their window. -When there is trauma there is an “elevated risk” for other disorders such as depression, anxiety, substance abuse, dependence and behavioral health issues. [6] So if youre out of sorts youre not alone, that’s a normal symptom, its not just you withdrawing from reality, its everyone rethinking about what needs to get done and how to better care for themselves and others, which explains why some people feel down, and some people become instantly hyper trying to button up all lose ends and make sure everyone is doing okay, its not a club, its maybe a sign you pass on the road, that lets you know what youre going through is normal and thousands of people drive by this sign everytime anything bad happens, its not the end of the world, and now we are getting to the important aspect of developing better coping skills.

What should we work on? “Resilience,” which according to positivepsychology.com is necessary to develop to “help you cope adaptively and bounce back after changes, challenges, setbacks, disappointments, and failures.” [7] Be a strong person, know that you are important, whether you fit in exactly to all equations in life, everyone stands where they choose to stand on issues, and maybe no one stands exactly where you have been in life, nor recognizes the difficulty in staying level headed through it all, all threats on multiple levels, if you allow that type of thinking to consume you then you never outgrow old fears, or present danger with regards to being mistaken as a follower to the interest or careers of others, Ive always supported everyone, Ive always given good advice to friends, I have never been upset with a single friend in my life, I don’t get into fights, I don’t get mad dogged, I don’t get intimidated, and Im always considerate and comfortable around others, that’s not being loving, that’s being on point, its when everything starts to bother you, or worry you, that everything seems like its becomes a problem, and if its not you that is causing it, its someone else who thinks that based on who you are or where you are in life view you to be the cause of what they are going through, Ive been through a lot, so while others may think that they are smarter than you, and want more information from you that doesn’t mean that what they are doing is right trying to scare you or use you to communicate a different message about you, nothing would seem like it was about me or anyone or any special interest in preserving the system of creation and understanding concepts in life through film and music if it didn’t matter to everyone to get an update on what needs work and what we are going through and how we can relate, if these songs and films resonate on a deeper level, that means that we are understanding one another, that we are supporting one another, and that no one is allowing any one persons success or lack of success interfere with their ability to be a good decision maker and be appreciative of everyone whoi is performing at this time, that helps lessen the load in terms of uncertaintly which I think we just discussed is a problem, being able to visualize what is going right in your head, and not just having conversations to yourself about what you think is going wrong, never blame people for your thinking, there is not such things as having a wrong thought, or saying the wrong thing, just be aware that if you are someone who says something without care for what someone else thinks don’t be surprised if that person takes it personally, and then tries to criticize you, that’s them waiting or reading for a mention, for permission to attack you on the basis of their thinking being excluded or chastised from consideration give your role online with readership and a consistent following which takes years to achieve, confidence in public speaking, or confidence to write a book, and have anything be memorized about you.

The problem with writing or blogging, is that a person might comprehend something to be true before they are given enough insight to see the positive in something about you, and for worse act on that negative judgement to affect you, so that no one else is able to see the positive in the work that you have completed thus far, and that’s the feeling of things being too late, don’t be too hard on yourself, even if someone doesn’t see your value or is trying to change an aspect of you that enjoys writing and talking to others, wanted to video and photo, I think past the point of being scared, if my audience can deal without those reassurances in life for now, then maybe that is not the proper form of communication I prefer at this time being made to feel small inside, or intimidated or made to feel sick or scared on the basis of what someone is doing to me thinking that I made light of anothers experience, if I had my own problems being out alone, that was me that iunstalled a new shower in my bathroom it was my landlord and that wasn’t a kidnapping duck tape reference, that was me on Sunset, who called the police with three men approaching me and ran to hide by the gas station, and three men were arrested that same weekend.

So that was me having had a similar experience, then for someone who thought to hurt me or try to brand me as being the same as someone who was attacked or kidnapped, that’s not how you treat women, to minimize the experience of one woman, in favor of another woman, then hurt someone like they possess some quality or trait about them “light” that’s being proud of myself, and try to destroy that image on my face or personality trait for whatever preference suits another interest in inhibiting my likeability future or ability to be loved and to be myself, maybe my goals are not the same, maybe my beauty is not the same, maybe my struggle is not the same, that doesn’t mean favor anyone who is made a billionaire over me simply because you think Im trying to get rich quick or don’t deserve to be paid after graduating from law school and finally getting interviews in a better place in life, its not my fault Im on meds, maybe it has to do with me being able to adjust to life and being around people after being hurt and Im sure that being hurt again will not make things any easier, and Im sure my symptoms are laughable to anyone who thinks Im making things up or haven’t been done unwanted before by someone Im not attracted to, its happened to the best of us, so don’t put me down in life, like Im not a good example of someone who moves forward in life and doesn’t waste time blaming and prosecuting people, its not always the victims fault, which is why blogging is a good step in the right direction leaving home, applying to jobs, talking to people again. 

Reference:

[1] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4800286/

[2] https://www.nytimes.com/wirecutter/blog/coronavirus-socializing-online/

[3] https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/disaster-distress-helpline/warning-signs-risk-factors

[4] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4800286/

[5] https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/disaster-distress-helpline/warning-signs-risk-factors

[6] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4800286/

[7] https://positivepsychology.com/resilience-skills/

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