abuse, blog, blogger, blogging, mental health, mental illness, negative judgment, relationships, religion, womens issues

Blogging with #mentalhealth Issues …

Blogging with #mentalhealth issues, presents some risks, the goal is to be consistent. So long as you notify your audience of what your deficits are, I think that’s a fair exchange for the value of your writing, in making a determination of what to keep in mind and what to let slide by. I think we all want to work hard, be presentable, and not have whatever is ailing us to come through our writing, and its not a good idea to come across as unpredictable. I think whenever you are made to be defensive about anything about you, it can create a frustration, either displayed in your writing, or turn your audience off in terms of what there is to accept about you or others. I think blogging with mental health issues, is not about paving any ways for people to put themselves out there if they have experienced mental health issues, I don’t think it’s a good idea to subject yourself to any amount of unwanted attentions when you are not doing well. 

So whats the value in a writing, of someone with known mental health issues, I think if I ever felt limited in what I had to say, then I would not have become a top personal development blogger, that also doesn’t mean that I have all of life figured out, like everyone the more you get to know yourself, the better off you’ll be, so don’t quit while youre ahead. I think as an audience member reading someones work who has known mental health issues, you either feel more comfortable hearing from a doctor, or someone’s analysis of a persons thinking or behavior from a more scientific standpoint, to me that’s a critical view of someone with mental health issues, I think we are all capable of being accepting of people based on how they are and how they speak without needing to know everything about them or what meds they take, I think I have been extremely open in that respect. 

How do things get better for someone with mental health issues through blogging? I think as a blogger you are required to come up with a topic of your choice to write about, and do the research, and if you can illustrate how this topic directly relates to something you have experienced in life, you don’t always have to personalize, your interest in a topic, and you also don’t have to make your topic about something that you have observed personally in life, there is so much more to life than what we have experienced first hand. Right now I am focused on not allowing my fears to become my reality, that requires setting limits, and establishing boundaries, something that I was not good at, until I faced difficulty personally and professionally, you’ll realize later in life, that if you just do the work, you wont have to explain yourself, and if you don’t have to explain yourself, then you don’t need to be assessed in terms of whether your viewpoints or behavior or personality, should be considered of issue, with regards to your work product. I don’t think its fair as a person with disability, to be judged as being less than capable of providing the same caliber work product as someone without disabilities. That’s just not true, even with disability, Im sure that I am capable of sounding just like the best of them, and that’s how you should view yourself, appease a standard that is above you, don’t allow your disability to set some standard of expectation of you to fail or to come across as “mentally ill.” Life can be confusing, that doesn’t mean that others need to be confused when looking at us, or judging us, take me for what Im worth, would be what I would have to say to someone who is expecting more, that’s not what blogging with mental health issues are about, its not a tutorial on how to think and behave in public or in private, and then be blamed should you have followed or listened to anothers experience be blamed should someone have an experience in life, blame you for that experience in life, I think we are all adults here, and all responsible for the choices we make in life, its no ones fault, if you have a bad experience in life, and its certainly not the writers fault. 

Blogging with mental health issues, doesn’t make you unpredictable, it makes the reaction to you unpredictable, that means, you will have something to say, and you cant always anticipate or understand at the same time, what it is that is being thought of you in the negative, having heard from you, you cant understand where people are coming from without hearing from anyone, and this is why feedback is so important, in the form of comments and likes, it lets you know what it is about your writing, that is significantly liked more than other pieces that you have written, and then the goal would be to focus on those aspects of your writing that speak to a bigger audience. I think with mental health issues, you wont always have a business plan for your future, that’s not something that you expect or comprehend becoming a blogger, that you will become popular, or be read in huge numbers, I know that I never expected that, and I also know that I was not prepared for an audience of that size. 

So on a personal note, this past month has been difficult for me, I have made some strides when coming to accept my new diagnosis, I got a job, and now get replies from #DASpitzer, but that doesn’t mean that I am problem free. In not being problem free, its important not to voice your frustrations out loud to an audience where anyone has the potential, for someone to be judgmental toward them, sided, that’s a discussion that is probably best to hold in private or in therapy, a frustration, a question, an annoyance, that’s not something that you discuss out loud, when your guard is down, and when you are not strong, is a typical stance of someone who is going to be attacked or is being attacked, and that’s the point, to hurt your confidence in life and to hurt how people see you, the more uncomfortable you get the more uncomfortable your audience gets and so on and so forth, there is a system for blaming feelings on people, and I have a feeling that if you have mental health issues you are not likely to win in a fight where someone is blaming their feelings from you, learning from you, watching you, and attacking you with expectation that you are supposed to speak in a way that supports a dislike toward you, and that’s what Im not doing, allowing for dislike of people with mental health issues. No one wants to be treated as stupid. That’s not the point of speaking, to be considered right about everything, its to not allow for someone to be subject to another bossing them around or threatening them on any basis, for who they are, their associations, what they look like, or what they are about, that doesn’t entitle anyone to belittle or hurt anyone in life, including me. 

So I think on a good day, I am positive, hopeful, and have a personal take on life, that benefits the reader in hearing, that means they feel apart of. On a bad day, this can cause a writing to appear about oneself only, and this can make a reader not feel apart of, and also not inclined to support, not knowing what the issue is or its triggers. With mental health issues, every day is difficult until things get better, and you are day to day, until you are able to function without aggravation and mental illness, mental illness can be severe sedation (in bed all day), it can be severe aggravation (feeling frozen having difficulty keeping up with tasks), it can cause a loss of energy and motivation (being scared of the world, and not wanting to apply for jobs). Mental health issues affect everyone differently, that’s just how mental health issues have affected me, and have also impacted the types of relationships I am able to have with people, who are extremely hard on me, superficial (wanting me to lose weight or judging me based on what I look like), or not trusting of me (because I don’t look or sound like someone with money and who has the stability of friends and a job, needy). So on a good day, you wont have to think about the past, on a bad day, you might rethink all your relationships and how you were and how you were treated and come to think of life differently, hopefully by the time you sit down in therapy and start to talk about your previous relationships, you don’t encounter the same problems in the future, people demanding of you in a way, that you either cant deliver personally, or be treated in a way, that you have not demonstrated, that’s typical of someone with mental health issues, for someone to not be sure of you, that’s because they are trying to read you, waiting on you to approach them, or you not being strong enough to approach them, and in that state of insecurity in needing help, ignored, and that instability you get judged for, that’s why having mental health issues can greatly impact the opportunities that you are afforded in life. I know before mental health issues, I applied and went to law school, I dated and almost got married twice, I worked in law firms and held good jobs, all of that changes when you are told that there is something wrong with you, and I don’t think that that’s fair that just because you are going through a difficult time, that the rest of your life is supposed to be difficult and disadvantaged. I don’t think its fair that there has to be some expected caliber of normal that you have to be at, with expectation for everyone to feel close to you, how is that normal? And how is that unfair if you don’t allow people to be close to you? How does that make you mentally ill, if you have difficulty being close to people, or upon people being close to you to ignore you, or expect for you to chase them for attentions, and if you leave attack you? 

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