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Getting Over It …

Outgrowing old problems is always a humbling quiet realization when we find ourselves once again situated at a disposition of discomfort however this time, determined in a different way to be more mindful of the energies of those around us, who maybe care less about what’s going wrong for you and more hopeful of all that can go right for you. When researching for tips on how to get over it, I didn’t find much until I looked up self-doubt. For me when you doubt yourself that can be the biggest hurdle standing in between you now to you next the bigger better person to any equation belittling. According to, “It’s normal to experience feelings of doubt when we are faced with new or challenging situations. Self-doubt is characterized by feelings of uncertainty regarding one or more aspects of the self.” [1] So believe in yourself and all that your capable of! These are minor roadblocks standing in the way, all you have to do is get through it, one day at a time. If you’re not goal setting then think what are you focusing all your attention to, the difficulty? The plan of action if you have one? Then end goal? The harsh realization? The road to get there? The tasks? There are so many different things to focus on when overcoming a problem the less you allow what you don’t have control over to get to you the less you allow yourself to be ruled by what you don’t have control over which can be an incredibly difficult and draining experience don’t add it all up throw yourself hands in the air and be powerless, the power is in you! Mind over matter. According to this article: “It helps to remind ourselves about the times that things have gone right,” and “On the flip side, it’s good to not focus too much on the past or past failures we might have had.” [2] So this is where I get creative, being a 12 stepper isn’t an easy road to take in sobriety you are constantly reflecting on your mistakes, your experiences, and get really hard on yourself, I don’t think that any detail is far from sight you over analyze you become self critical you depose and question yourself constantly let alone become more or less paranoid about what everyone else is thinking of feeling in your time away from others, a difficult time is not something that’s easy to get through on your own. So get out of your shell hard headed or not, lost, hopeful, adventurous, problem solving, all phases of problem solving begin with first knowing your part, where you’ve been, where you’re headed, and from there you base your capabilities in life some more free than others depending on what your limitations are. Being creative means that even if you have experienced worse situations in life you tackle each hurdle with the same professionalism detail sensitivity care and focus as you would approach any problem in life whether or your own making in life you can’t make things better so long as you are standing in a situation of risk, resentment, fear, criticism, loneliness, heartbreak, shame, guilt, embarrassment a few feelings that come to mind that usually keep us feeling stuck, don’t get left behind in life! Life’s all about catching back up to all the good feelings that life has to offer. 9 times out of 10 if you start with criticism you subject yourself to criticism it seems to happen that way what you can’t fix about others you have to fix within yourself and from there a change happens whether or not the energy is coming from you or purely responsible for accepting accommodating or not responding to any attitude in life you’ve previously had and learned the hard way doesn’t work out for you in your favor. Some are capable being anyone they want to be, not everyone is privileged to not care what people think, I used to think those were the strong people the opinionated talkative but there are setbacks to sharing your mind being considered as someone in their head, stuck in their head, or not aware of others. Simple checkpoint is are you listening, how’s your memory, quality of conversations, public appearances, correspondence, email etiquette, can you make a phone call, are you limited to text and messenger, do you use your computer are you stuck on your phone, are you reading daily, do you watch the news, are you following any tv shows, do you have time to watch a movie, there are a ton of self-help checklists for comprehending when your in a problem and not doing what you need to do to get out of a problem. So stay active, be humble, do your best, check in often, and never give up! Keep busy.




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