There are many phases to recovering from mental health issues, and if you are someone like me who is used to operating on all cylinders, and being a busy bee, then its really frustrating to endure any kind of disability which interferes with your ability to keep busy and stay motivated. There will be periods in your recovery from mental health issues when the days feel long or short, when everything feels like a chore, when you overthink about time, the time of the day, your activities, and there will be moments when you have difficulty keeping track of whats gotten done and what needs to get done. There is always time to get organized whats more important is your health so that when you do fully recover you can steadily get back up to speed, whatever was your daily schedule to begin with, for me my yesterday looked like:
- Writing quotes, off the top of my head for my Instagram based on what I am going through presently, thinking wise, whats bothering me, whats worrying me.
- Editing my Instagram, removing old content that makes me seem like I am being too much or makes me look mentally ill or overly emotional or opinionated, tweets.
- Getting my energy up, work on walking everyday, yesterday was a rest day, and instead of letting that bother me missing a day and not walking at night, going on a long run today to make up for the missed run yesterday.
- Texting with pen pals, keeping them up to date on how Im feeling and where Im at and if I can be entertaining try to share a little content that shows more about myself so that they can get to know me, or share information or facts with them, to help them to see things better if that would help them, not to feel so bad about anything recent. (Kim).
- I just stopped a two week period of modeling to me that’s performing, you have to be fresh faced for the camera, and look healthy, well rested, and do my makeup right and make sure to take good care of my skin, wash my face, use serum, and face lotion, and eye cream, and make sure to be able to smile, meaning being in positive spirits and sharing that with the person who I am making photos for, so that my mood is positive and so that upon looking at me they are not bothered, especially not by anything that I am going through, upon observation you learn a lot about people, and that’s a gift of being an audience member, not to be picked apart studied, its when you are being studied that there are a lot of side-effects to being in the public eye, it can cause stress, it can affect your ability to plan goal set and carry things through, it can affect your ability to not be bothered by what you are feeling, and you wont always feel good, doing what youre doing whether that be positive things like running or modeling.
- Then I updated my websites, I just started publicizing mymollydoll.com on Weebly, and still need to set up the Google Adsense, its on, I just need to make sure that my ads.txt is inserted and that the ad shows up in the column to the right, that I input the HTML to.
- And did research for two blog posts, which was an original goal to write articles or useful tutorials and life advice pieces that also share with reference to other articles that I found interesting, and keep up with my additional studies, which I have put off.
- Read from my life coaching text book, and get reacquainted with my life coach certificate alternative on Udemy, that I can finish in a couple weeks, if I stay focused, and then from there figure out what other credentials I need to be a life coach, or blog.
Yesterday was my first full day on, meaning I did more than one task, I worked all day, I spent time with family, I was not in my room all day, I did some free-writing, I wrote posts for my new website lesliefischman.com/lesliefischman.wpcomstaging.com (haven’t decided on a website domain name yet, still trying to figure out whether Google Adsense works for one or both). It takes time to move forward its not just love that is a motivating force behind getting better there has been a lot of work on my end to get well, that a human being simply cant cheer you up to get you going again and make you feel included that’s something that you have to do on your own, theres no system of argument or thinking, strategy, or publicity know-how, that gears you up for more attention or less attention, or shields you from the pressures of negativity, that hits all of us when things go awry, and while some may be immune from being hurt and others seem unphased, that doesn’t mean that upon being brought to your attention what others are going through that you empathize per se and feel the same way, but you know what its like when people are disinterested or worry if people think less of you, or less impressed by you, I think Im a good example of someone who maybe wasn’t the prettiest or the smartest but worked hard, and when there were opportunities available for me to shine, I found myself shining with the tools that were offered to us, like Alexa, and sadly to my knowledge they are retiring their ranking program, which was exciting for me to participate in, and like all things exciting, things only go well for you so long as you are doing well and appearing well for that matter, that you cant change about how people feel, that when you are not doing well, or if anyone is broadcasting you in the negative that can be a tough pill to swallow, to step down from what was going well for you, and take a back seat to the success of others, which you may or may not be included in, or remembered for having done the work to be where you are, what does get remembered are your low points and that tends to be the theme of people who are successful by money, what happens to them when they make bad decisions hurt people and get in trouble with the law, that’s not my story, I don’t hurt people, and I don’t have legal problems, I have mental health issues, so if it’s a fear, its that Im being overpowered by a force that is greater than me that is affecting my mental health, its not drugs or alcohol its my brain is not functioning, I am not thinking thoughts, I am not writing, and not doing anything is not a strategy for laying low it makes things worse and that’s the current stress that Im under from underperforming over the past year and for not making progress with my blog and for struggling with the elements of what the issue is with me, based on how I have led my life private, which for the most part over the past five years has been staying home, not hooking up, not dating, not working, and not being social, and working on my writing, and if I could get a job worked for those few months, I never expected to not be able to function, and that’s probably what being a celebrity is about being made tired, or if bombarded with negativity decreased functioning, which either you can perform through, or youre not professional enough to withstand the pressures and feel outnumbered or made to feel small.
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