blogging, blogging tips, negative judgment

Theres No Such Thing as Friend-Enemies …

Theres no such things as friend-enemies. Its common when paranoid to feel like everyone is against you, I promise you that that discomfort lies from within, so figure out what it is that you are feeling insecure about, and try not to let those facts about you bother you so much. Most people only know what you tell them, so if there is something that you are going through that youre feeling insecure about its easy to become defensive and to isolate, unless you allow whats bothering you to get to your head, I assure you that if you go about things in the right way, you will receive more understanding than misunderstanding along the way. For example, for everything that I have gone through, when I have felt lost, out of place, alone, or introverted by whatever was plaguing me, it all went away the moment I started being positive about myself again, and started letting go of all the things Im not, that can really mess with your head when you allow your fears of what other people think to convince you that those feelings are real, theyre not, its just things that youre thinking that you think that others are thinking that you are allowing to bother you and your thinking, so don’t let those negative thoughts keep you from being the version of yourself you were before all those thoughts came to mind. Where does paranoia stem from? According to mind.org.uk “Paranoid thoughts are usually to do with your ideas about other people and what they might do or think.” [1] So if this is something that you struggle with, especially as a blogger online, wondering too much about what others think of you, or being insecure about what you are saying worried that anyone may misinterpret what you are saying for insult, don’t let it get to you, share your opinions but with an open-mind, meaning don’t allow a negative interpretation of what could be thought keep you from exploring your writing in a way that illustrates how to view everything in the positive, there are always two ways of looking at things, so don’t be limited by the negative and make sure that if it’s the negative that keeps interjecting itself into your writing, explain how and why that it is that way for you, and maybe declare how you wish things were or could be rather than how you feel things are, theres an explanation for everything, so be willing to explain, if you want others to be willing to understand you in a better way, there is no wrong or right way to think about life, there are infinite possibilities for how to view life and how to interpret events and scenarios in your mind, of how you would like to remember, or think about life, in a way that suits you, or for some people, they prefer to hold those grudging opinions in life, and steadfastly hold on to those opinions of disdain or negative discourse when it comes to things that they abhore or despise, just hopefully not be one of those people that is so difficult to comprehend or accept that the meaning behind your writing gets lost in the mix due to negative opinion of you, I think that would be the biggest fear in any writer, for what they have said to not be regarded as coming from an enlightened state of being, or from the heart and be treated like whatever they are saying is ordinary or common place, easy to say, nothing in writing is easy to say, and like most people who have difficulty talking unless they know what they are talking about, blogging is no different, and in the same way we speak for reaction, no one in general speaks for a negative reaction to be directed back at them, that’s for sure. -So think of your audience as your friends, people who know who you are, follow your work, and also have high expectations of you, a little different than friends where you can just be yourself and don’t ever worry about what they think, or worry too much in your time away from them about them thinking or saying anything about you, to cause you discomfort, friends are people that you feel comfortable around, and that explains why people have friends, a constant in life, people they can be around and talk to without worry, some consistency socially, to hear from and keep in touch with people who you genuinely care about and enjoy hearing from. Today with blogs, you can read and have no friends, so just like friends, no one is trying to hold a negative opinion of you, not unless you become the sort of person that frustrates them or upsets them in some way, because you are not how you were, or not consistent with your health a certain way that they expect you to be, you have to learn to roll with the punches. We cant be there for everyone, and recovery is an incredibly selfish phase of adjusting to reality and finetuning your physical and mental health that you cant be there for others in the same way that you once were, because you don’t feel good and when you don’t feel good chances are that people are not getting a consistent vibe of “everythings okay” from you, and for some people that’s a dealbreaker, meaning cant be friends with you or associate with you, when you are not doing well, either they don’t have the time to care for you, or what you are going through is bothering them, and that can be a tough pill to swallow from the standpoint of someone who is trying to get better, and do better, and does not yet feel better. So in that space, fill it with quiet and this can occur by reading, writing, journaling, exercising, talking to friends and family, therapy, working, basically keeping busy, when your mind is off of what you think others are thinking, you begin to forget those worries all together, and when that quiet space builds that’s you moving forward, and when youre moving forward you are more likely to not hold on to those feelings that are directing your thoughts and thinking to say things are they were, and instead accept the way you are now, and hopefully those who doubted you can begin to accept you the way you are now, recovered from what was ailing you, and with that comes understanding/compassion. Compassion, occurs when even if someone does not forgive the state you were in, or understand it, it likewise no longer bothers them the moments when you were not doing well, and no longer affected by when you were not doing well, and how that made them feel, and when you are well hopefully they can forget what it was that they did not understand about you, or what was bothering them about you to begin with when you were not doing well. 

Reference:

[1] https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/paranoia/about-paranoia/

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