For the first half of my life I was always one of the most popular girls in school, in elementary school, high school, and college. I never had social problems, was not prescribed any medications, and did not go to therapy or group therapy, I didn’t have problems until college, that’s when I started dating and experimented with drugs, when you face your first instability in life alone, its how you cope with your problems on your own, that makes the difference between recovery and addiction. Like all things, addiction worsens an already unstable condition, and if you are not participating in addictions with others, that isolated state that’s distant for others to get to, is considered a false independence that is frowned upon by others, misjudged as being in your own head, absent thinking of others, or not thinking of others, and not engaging with others in a friendly and loving way. I think going through a lot can make it difficult to be close to others, you will not understand what has changed your condition until you get help for it, that’s my best advice when going through a tough time and it can be because of sex, drugs, and alcohol that your ability to fair well in the world becomes stifled, that incongruence to things, that feeling out of place, less than, lost sense of confidence, it will be in what you are doing right in life that gives you that sense of peace again, to excel at what you are good at in life, and that makes others feel better, without having to feel good with either through friendship or sex, some of us weaker because of.

• Excuse for Disbelief

By the time you’ve realized it, you may find yourself at odds with others, it them becomes more important for you to focus on what you are doing and thinking rather than on what others are doing and thinking, that’s taking responsibility for how you feel, and what your outlook is in the world, have more power and control over how you feel, rather than react and change over every little things that you feel criticized for, at the end of the day you are in your body, this is your life, you are in your mind, and you have to challenge yourself to still love yourself, care about yourself, and live a life, even if there are people unhappy with you, or who feel wronged by your condition of instability, addiction, or lack of success, maybe you have failed to make a good impression onto them, because you don’t make money and don’t have a degree that they see as smart or hardworking, but you have to do things for yourself, that’s when you have to stop trying to please others, their unhappiness with you will only eat away at you, the more you improve and the more distant they become or non-accepting of you, cold to you, or not feeling good by you, sometimes people grow apart, you cannot make everyone happy. People expect you to live a calculated life to the betterment of others, and sometimes in bettering yourself, people will not see the value in what you are doing such as writing, think its hyper or means that youre high, or see it as defensive, or argumentative, or doesn’t make sense to them, or too much. You know however long it takes for you to get back to being yourself there are no rules to what is the proper way to live life, heal, experience life, or process your experiences in life, and if talking about life in a group setting isn’t working, it is always okay to write. That’s not exposing yourself in an unhealthy way, its exposing your thoughts in a thoughtful way which others can read and interpret at their leisure. What will not make sense will be the time it takes from when you are a non-professional to the time you become a professional and that’s confidence. The constant criticism, of you will therefore be by the standards for comparison, to see whether you look and appear less than as compared to others, and that’s how they judge a personality from being unique in a way that can be identified as solid or whether standing out as stupid, that is how you appear down the line in observance next to others, do you fade or shrink become smaller in the face of others (as a bully is compared to saying but not facing up to it), or do you make others stronger the more confident you become, standing out without the impact upon being seen, and is your happiness admirable or annoying or repulsive to see, that means does your smile indicate that you are at peace within, and your thoughts at ease, or is their a caliber of negative judgment onto you, for others to witness you as having something stored within that is not appropriate to be happy or strong about or a love that is not recognized to be healthy.

• To Remove from Equation

Sometimes people who do not feel stronger by you, who think there is something wrong with you, will feel threatened by what they don’t understand about you. Likewise you should not be threatened by the demeanor of others, just as excuse for their negative interpretation of you is based upon a feeling or an assumption of that being the quality about you to designate embarrassment or classify you as among those to see as invisible or out of sorts, hit over the head, with something they cant see, to push for a false belief that can be fed by each taker to the notion of there something being wrong with you, as though its something that you cant see if visible on you, meaning there to be something wrong with you to misclassify you as someone who is gone on the their own merits disconnected as out of touch with people, if there is an energy or a look on them weird, to say that they are not to be connected to because there is an unstable element of weird on them or on their face, which makes them not make sense looking at them, means they are not healthy, or have been connecting with people who are unhealthy.

• Solidarity in Solution

There is a sense of pride in what people have come to accept, and if you are a figure of 17 million views, then its either you accept yourself as you are, and all previous rationalizations and compartmentalizations of concepts absent you, or you are part of the problem, meaning that because you are not fit among, that that means that you don’t see among, if your sense of stability and peace is not in the quiet of the majority, who comes to terms is the quiet in the majority, which can either occur through a consistent argument toward with breaks in between for allowance of things to come to terms, or there is nothing said, but everyone knows when it is a good time to reflect when things are not good, when people are feeling at a loss, or when you have to embark on a new chapter in life, and consider your options, not a condition to be frowned upon in non-acceptance. Its during times of reflection that hyper or humor is viewed as being in poor taste, and when love is viewed as being inappropriate. I have always noticed that when I am concentrating going through a lot people try to get into me talking to me to get through to me, and when I am in love content, people are eager to talk to me interested in me and I am not interested in them, those are my odds for attraction, why it makes sense that when on a good day I am accomplishing a lot that I get voices, not that that doesn’t happen in real life. You cannot be pushed and controlled by people when you are on your own, but it is by what you let in when things are good that you are either unaffected or devastated by misdirecting thoughts about you to others, or being misdirected confidence wise look stupid compared to.

• Ruling Out Problems – Designated

When a problem is identified in you, that’s to get others to focus on you with the problem in mind, to make sense of everything they think is the problem with you, for negativity that’s a simple solution to them not having to waste time with comprehending that your fears and instability are real and were due to real crimes, real losses, real breakups, real deaths, or real devastation, I think we all get affected by these things, but to be viewed as affected makes you seem like its excuse for disability now, and that’s not how all disability happens, its in what you cant see and what youre not coping with that can cause the gravest disability. I just took it upon myself to look up the definition of bipolar and schizophrenia, and Im not sure how this happened if these problems did not exist when I was in law school, but it must be because of what has later bothered me, come to mind, and through my own discussions in life that that belief was later held of me, and I don’t think that a diagnosis is proper for condemning or illustrating blame on my behalf as though there is some unhappiness or instability coming from my life, being, body, mind, or mentality, that is spread upon exposure of me, if stupid doesn’t make stupid, and if smart doesn’t make smart, and if bipolar doesn’t make bipolar, then it is also wrong to assume that I should be held responsible for the feelings that another gets based upon looking at me, knowing me, or seeing my life, become angered with me, or upset with me, you cannot be held responsible for the upsets of others when you are doing well, and doing your best everyday of your life, to live life, stay alive, be positive, and share in a way that warns, deflects away an unnecessary necessity on subjects which can cause harm mentally to the comprehension of others, such as to waste time focusing on wrongs, and forgetting to see the beauty in life and what love is about. Love is not about masturbation, pervert, chaste, sex addict, touching, molesting, shrinking, being close to, making strong, becoming bigger or smaller to others, feeling pretty, recognizing your womanhood, or being a more solid human being. Sex is for making children and for experiencing pleasure with others or yourself, and like most things intimate if shared among a group is inappropriate to discuss, therefore with 17 million in my audience, why would I have a problem that causes disgust and be liked by 17 million who go to sleep at night and upon closing their eyes do not visualize or get a picture to their mind of me engaging in an activity that I have not engaged in for the majority of my life, neither with the body of another or with my own body, not a bathing suit person, did not date until college. Therefore it is not in my mentality and the basis for acceptance and comfort with me, it is for the reasons that I don’t elicit for sexual attentions, I don’t look like sexual attention, and my face does not cause a visualization of a sexual act committed on me, or for the commission of another. That is being a good person, you don’t get a fear, you don’t get a nightmare, and you don’t get a feeling, of a sexual energy from them, upon looking at them, not stimulated by others. I am someone who when I walk in a room see no one and everyone sees me, that means that I am focused on myself, because no one stands out to me, I don’t notice their face, or their body, means that I am not looking at people, in a way that they feel looked at or looked into.

• To Foster Group Love Absent You

When people feel comfortable, the quickest way for people to feel closer, is upon having a shared fear of you, that quiet anxiety is healed by the shock of you having no one and them having eachother, and so be it, that’s the isolationist, feels scared of everyone, and having no one close to them, and that comfort is only reinforced the longer you isolate, the closer they become upon communication with one another absent you, and that’s sometimes what separates the strong from the weak, its being talked about, and being uncomfortable around others. People feel better and stronger with their loved one, the other is angered or mad or isolates a person, because they feel apart of, and when they see you think that they are better than you, this is how men make women feel important, they confide in them, and alienate or are hard on the other, this is what separates the loved from those who are independent who are not to be affected in the negative by people who are sweet to some and hard on others. Its like society allows for this to happen to allow for some people to be special and to separate those who don’t feel special to continue to be picked if they are good and stay positive. Picking the gems from the tarnished, who is smart enough to be well liked in spite of who does not like them, chances are when someone does not like you it is because they like someone else more, or want someone else to feel good by public declaration that they do not like you, or for more support in dislike of you, to qualify you or to attract you people of indifference, dullness, who do not attract, who do not belong, make children, as though you are trash of an identity, or spirit that is not created on your own, to be taken or used to the betterment of others, without allowing you to benefit from a well condition, I once described myself as a Chevron, and compared having a woman’s body to being a “D hospital,” to me that means that someone who does not feel good can feel good by you and doesn’t need you and can move on, and that strength of focus that you have that is lost upon consummation with another, is something that they run of with, I called your ”Casper shadow,” the spirit of you that is in another, that you cant identify that is missing from your being, that you either get back or lose, upon communication and exchange with others, this is why to have a strong sense of yourself, rather than lose a confidence in exchange with another who feels more strong, resolute, and mature by you, and sees you as less than.

• Belief in Themselves

People don’t want to believe in the good in you, when they feel offended or annoyed by something about you they either see first hand and assume causes for, or hear about either from others or worse yet your writing, at this point because of so many unwanted intrusions and unwanted influences onto me as in a position of power with 17 million views, I wont know the reasons why I get attacked, robbed, or exposed, and it will always be for personal reasons to the benefit of who feels entitled to hurting me, as though I have some kind of privilege or wellness like a Chevron that they are entitled to pumping out of me, whether that’s intelligence or words for interpretation. A person who is angry is limited their thoughts are short, their mind does not keep going, and it stops, and when a persons mind stops, it either gets upset easily why they tell you not to assume, an assumption is a stop in thoughts upon a created solid indicator in your mind like rocks on a path to a location create, that can wrongfully direct or misdirect your thoughts from consideration or comparison like stigma a terms do to a mind or to a audiences perception of you either your audience is smart enough to not use those rocks to indicate a path in thinking or of treatment of you, and create paths on their own, or those rocks can create a fast pass quick judgment 405 short cut on a highway to establish a negative belief of you which is an unhealthy way to use groupthink to fast pass permission for hate or for non acceptance of people, even if to protect people, the least it can do is keep people away from people which should not affect people. The point at which an anger is transferred is to see how you respond when it gets short in the head, and you don’t have thoughts, when you are isolated, and when others do not respond, what do you have in your mind, what can be created in front of you, how are you able to describe a situation of feelings and does what you have to say upon examination by others make sense or does it wrongfully give a fast pass back on the 405 short cut to people who mean well protecting themselves feel in harms way upon describing what was done to you, and this is an example of how mutual understanding public solves. It allows for both sides to have equal access to whats being comprehended with fast passing each side to a rhetoric of abhorable terms to cause anguish to some to see how they respond when there is term being used to describe them wrongfully that is not deserved or by their own doing. A person who does not have sex, is not their choice, and person who loves without sex is not their choice, and person who is called names for not having sex is not their choice either, that doesn’t mean that Im not fit to date or procreate, I have eggs! Im not used up! So don’t call me something that is preserved as interfering with my health or the mental health of others to spread germs into the minds of others about my mentality wellness or body.

• Mischaracterization to Calculate Failure

When you mischaracterize someone, its either they fail, or its to explain a previous failure, while this many not make sense and feel good if its being done to you, its to describe, justify and make feel better people who come to know you and like you who are no longer in the number one position, that is loved by you. The power only goes to the past when that number one position that they had in you loving them, means that they deserve to have a number one position in terms of representing what it feels like to be in your life and loved by you, either designating the remainder of that power to be left with them and spare you the other half of that power to remain with you, but assertion of a power lost only means that the person moved on does not have the authority or right to defend themselves as having lost a power, if the person complains that they have lost a power, means that that power is assumed to be left in you, so the only way to move forward past a break in which a power is lost is to give that power back and to not complain by who is angered with you, or assumes for their to be a power in you, that you are not entitled to that they feel entitled to destroying as though they had a power prior to connecting with you that was lost upon disconnecting with you, or to claim that a power that they had has been affected by the power that they were exposed to that weakened the power that they had, that’s to say that the power that you have upon combination with others has a potential to mismanaged in a way that either affects their management of their own power or claim that you are given a power that is mismanaged by you, upon which power in the giver feels at a lost based upon who is empowered by you, therefore if bad people are empowered by you then you are blamed as being given a power that attracts bad to you to claim that you don’t deserve power because power in you gets mismanaged, or to justify a dislike toward you so that people who have power can identify amongst themselves as to avoid you as not having a similar power to them, so that their Harry Potter conference, can test whether when you have power it is a demonstration of weakness or desire in powerlessness that does not offend others.

• Made for On Behalf Of

Demonstrations of non-acceptance are to spread a message that when this happens and when this is not responded to properly, this is how people are made to feel insignificant, if the trend is to either punish where undue influence change and interpretation can be made in cohorts meaning among thoughts that create a disjointed perspective of outcomes, and if protested against, that that is not how things should be viewed, than that perceived non-acceptance or apathy is not for those who feel victimized by a lack of attention for, but its for prior solutions that are deemed to address a problem by focus on the issues in a way to create attention for victims and their issues, that’s to protect victims from feeling the burden of having to fight a fight for people or fight a fight when there is a requirement for a fight, you cant victimize victims by making them fight this is why we have people to fight for people, who can analyze and address without wasting time and energy on people to describe what they are experiencing we understand and can comprehend pain, even myself. I think its if you are not a victim be careful not to be judged as someone who has never been victimized, then they think that you are strong and judgmental and don’t protect you if they think that your experiences don’t represent what is possible to occur, when you are blamed for your own experiences that means that the problem lies in you, therefore to free from blame others as though you are not the driver of your own thoughts by substances and therefore the driver of your thoughts is not others, meaning the instability that is created within you is identified as there being something wrong with you not to bestow on to others, if a person is not richer in life because of you, they don’t want an influence or a characteristic from you they identity on you that makes people not want to be around them or less loveable, that’s dislike, you sponge and carry on things in life, or by insult accuse you of carrying on conversations without thinking, to show that you are empty on the inside malleable, not concrete and influential in a way that deters, moveable like a pawn. People don’t feel comforted by someone moveable like a pawn that loses power and insults, or gets power and is rejected, means that they should not be engaged in any power exchanges. That is how you get viewed when you are lost or gone looking, how someone with ADHD or bipolar can be confused with a drug addict someone with no thoughts and if you have no thoughts to add injury to insult call you mentally ill, to blame you for having no thoughts therefore anothers anger toward you is assuming they have no thoughts because of you affected, and that’s why they keep people away, who cannot think freely absent knowing you.

• Out of a Sense of Entitlement

People who feel well amongst themselves and harmed by you, means you entered their life and you left their life, therefore you were a waste of their time being in their life, they don’t comprehend failure, upset, difficulty, or sickness, if its viewed as addiction or “delusions” that means you don’t feel well among, and to them that’s the problem of someone who has it good and does not stay well who they expect to benefit from a group mentality that most people feel strong or protected among. To me I think separation means you don’t feel well, and cant make another feel good, that should not be used to judge someone as not feeling good by, or at risk of being blamed for you not feeling good like it has anything to do with them, like a Chevron, all you can imagine is that had you stayed well you would be able to continue to make an impression of someone well, and because you are not feeling well, people assume that you are to be treated like someone who is gone, not doing anything with their life, or sounds weird and looks weird, because of drugs and has out there conversations that don’t make sense based upon a designated state of being they deem “drug addict” or “offender” something off and not smart about them, not for procreation or jobs, to be ignored, or not taken seriously. There are many reasons like I said for stigma, and mostly to fast pass the 405 short cut, away from people who they consider not worth their time and energy, means doesn’t think alike, this is why I blog.

• To Live Without You In Mind      

Breakups are hard, Ive not had a single breakup with a door closed in my entire life, and talk to everyone who has ever engaged in any close relationship with me in life, I don’t shut doors and ignore people, but with 17 million views and a book, I have value, therefore why all of a sudden with value should I tolerate hate, disruption, sabotage or be treated like Im stupid, I don’t treat people that way, Im not condescending, I don’t come on to people, I don’t look at people like their stupid, I don’t engage and reject people to make them think twice or feel confused, and I don’t feel threatened or disadvantaged by others, Im not competitive. To improve I support and participate and that’s very much a part of my growth as a blogger, as much as it was required to do the research and send likes and add people, the same is required of you once you have a creation of your own, you have to do the work again. And with mental health issues, there will be you before you got hurt, and there will be you after you go hurt, there will be you before diagnosis, at peace hardworking, and there will be you after diagnosis, not accomplishing as much, staying home, and others refusing to view you as disabled, and thinking that you are lying or making up a condition to free you from blame, if anything a diagnosis gives opportunity and forgiveness to others to judge me, to hurt me, to use me, to abuse me, to F with my head, to talk $hit about me, to hate me, to defame me, and to hurt me because they think everything under the sun can be blamed on people who are not normal and who are designated for there to be something wrong with them, that’s the disadvantage of diagnosis, its for when something bad happens are you awake or asleep, as you sharp or stupid, are you happy or angry, are you social or not social, all of which is used to determine whether you are protected or not protected by people who either feel close to you or distant to you when things are good or bad and likewise are you in control of your own distance to people in the event things are good or bad, and if things are good or bad is there anything bad that you are doing that would make others not feel good by you when things are not good and that’s why people who are bad or who are not considered good they stay away from because to feel double bad is a situation in which people will feel hurt by not stronger by others, when what is making people feel good is a bad basis, that is why I get attacked and criticized for the basis of me feeling good on what merits good or bad and in the length of time to accomplish what were the factors on going triggered in my life toward the accomplishment of those goals were those directions in life and motivations for directions in life acquired by wrong, or was there a good happening already prior to the commission of a wrong which was established prior to discussion or for wrongful solicitation of attentions to me as though I am wrong, was born wrong, am wrong, or have wrong elements that create the wrong thoughts I put myself together no one person, no acts, and no crimes put me together with people, you go where you belong, who you contact, and when something bad happens all you have to talk to is who is within, no new party can help you, and no trouble faced by you or them can be corrected if its deemed you are not the driver of your own car and body in life manipulated by criminals and not spiritually connected in life that its not by words exposures that everything is renavigated in your mind influenced attracted to.