Once your troubles leave you you’ll have time to think more, but it’s the time period adjusting that can feel the most troublesome and time consuming, like getting yourself out of any rut in life, whether its addiction, a bad breakup, a state of paranoia, coming off a drug or alcohol, the recovery time is a process, so learn to love the body you’re in and when its time to think about life expectancy and energy, well only you know when its time to scale down and when its time to keep going. I think those who are successful and working, keep going, the types who can handle doing many things in life and not just one thing well, maybe explains why they have families and jobs and friends, we can’t all be successful in that right but we try to be. Most don’t intend to fall by the wayside like me, I never intended to struggle in life, Ive always tried to do my best, rarely with a plan, but always had goals in mind whether or not I measured up to who I wanted to be in life, I was never disappointed in who I was or who I became until I failed at something I loved, its one of the most heartbreaking feelings in the world, it just makes you stop life, and later you learn is just depression and can be treated with meds. There’s no point in beating yourself up over time lost, there is a lot that you can do in your time, even if its just in how you manage your day. I was thinking today, since Ive started work, you can concentrate on one thing and do it well for an hour, or you can get multiple tasks done in an hour, its all about how you manage your time, and if youre like me with learning disability or focus problems, then you will do best at what you are in the mood for, or have planned in your mind for the day (that always helps), or you have to push yourself doing what you are told or what is expected of you, and sometimes that can be hard, sometimes it feels like pressure, and sometimes you can accomplish things even if you don’t feel like its going to happen to you, that’s focus, when you are doing many things right, it makes it easier to allow for other things to happen for you mentally and spiritually, but you have to put the work in, that’s how you get to a better feeling, its not always by meds or people, is what isolation teaches us, whether you prefer to be surrounded by people having fun in life, or away from others complaining about the world and how challenging life is, eventually you start living again, you’ll be glad you stayed, and not give up on others so easily, even your enemies, or your past, there is always a way of accepting the way your life is, even what brings you pain, there is a peace that occurs when you realize that others have been through a lot, and able to be positive again, you’ll be happy to have met them in life, and recognize how important it is to have met people like that toward you when you were not feeling well, and one day hopefully others trust your good mood to have a positive influence on them, its all about what you have to offer in this world to become a success story, making the most of what you do have in life, all jokes, analogies, comparisons, humors, codes, and likeness imitated, you will find that you are more like others than you are different and this is what makes you realize how unique and special you are and once you realize that you will then recognize how others see themselves and why enthusiasm is expected of you to others in your life, to not be enthused is a sign of bad things to come. You quickly learn that life is much like a game of survivor, that if things are not going your way, either that’s others telling you that you don’t belong, teaching you a lesson, or confronting you about your influence on others in life and how that makes them feel as connected, you will not known the reasons for concern not unless you bring others down in life, that’s called using, when others are negatively impacted by your struggles in life, and assume that being connected to you will similarly situate them to empathize with a side to life that they would rather not sit in connection with, either to be made fun of, or to get unwanted attentions by people who they do not need investigating who they are or why they care or how they know you or be judged for what they think at what time and why, everyone is trying to be tough and proud so just respect people for their strength not their weaknesses. If your someone looking for weaknesses in others, then you’re probably someone who blames influences and people for deficits, and someone who believes in separating people from people in order to make people better, and usually this helps empower people to believe that they have been wronged by someone who they have become separated from, its easier sometimes to believe that a problem lies outside of you rather than inside of you, and maybe we can do a little less about blaming people for whats inside of us, I think its only with love you get the spiritual essence of what its like to feel like another person, and when that’s difficult, you will still be visited by those who care whether you welcome their attentions or not, that’s having a broad audience, you will always be you, but there will always be an influence outside of you unconfirmed as a writer, that when you tap into those insights brings those cares to life as though you are speaking for who you believe to be reading your blog. I think the better a writer you are, the less you make people feel spoken to in writing, and the less they feel identified by you in writing, to then feel outted explained or described by your writing, as singling them out to not be “the norm” or any assumed body of people, who are given judgment free cards in life, unattached, or unexposed to the troubles you face, or perceived to be faced by those who know you. I don’t think blogging started as a way to be well known, I think it was a form of entertainment and growing enthusiasm for free writing, which I did not do much of during law school, I wrote one journal entry on a legal pad, and two long writing pieces on my macbook, and one long writing piece a letter in a notebook, and drew some sketches in scribble that turned out cool.