Whenever I find myself responding to a traumatic event or loss, I think about how can I not make things worse than they already are, and what can be said to help make things better. I’ve found that during times of trauma, people want more answers than questions, it’s more settling to the mind to explain things to others, whether its your own feelings, or what anyone else could possibly be thinking about. It makes people feel less alone, hearing from you, it’s sometimes hard not to care. Knowing what to say doesn’t come easy to most people, I often times, feel stuck and don’t know what to do or say, to alleviate the stress associated with losing others due to medical reasons, drugs, addiction, or alcoholism, we pray that everyone will get through it, and its not easy when others lose their battles. The most important thing to do for anyone during a time of need is to be there for others. I totally understand social media breaks, I tried taking one myself and my symptoms only got worse, I guess part of my stability requires me to make sure that those who follow me are also stable thinkers too about life.  

Here are 5 Ways to Care Even When You’re Scared:

• Call a therapist, counselor, or psychiatrist, and tell them how you’re feeling schedule an appointment! Be on top of your health, whether it’s a medication change or getting labs done.
• Call a hotline, I know that most times, it just feels like too much in you, but you eventually have to let it out, what’s bothering you, so if you can’t figure out what’s wrong, find someone to talk to, it helps to problem solve in the company of others, rather than try to solve everything yourself.
• Keep Track of Your Thinking – Progress is one of the most rewarding feelings, maybe one of the reasons why I blog or journal, when you witness your own progress, this motivates you.
• Don’t be afraid to keep up to date with the news, read articles, genuinely care about others. There are so many wonderful people out in the world, get to know others too, it helps.
• Try calling the police or 911, or file a report, I know that in the trauma and chaos of not knowing what’s serious or not, you can always ask someone else, is this something to complain or sue for.

Anytime you’re scared to help, doesn’t mean its your fault, sometimes it can feel that way, its like your confidence is depleted in the event that something doesn’t go right, guaranteed there is someone else out there more able than you and it can be frustrating that its not you that’s functioning and able to help in the immediate. Sometimes trauma works that way, we may need help, and other times we may be able to be there for others. It’s important to reflect on your own life, what would you like to be done for you in the event that you were in the shoes of another, sometimes that can lead you toward saying the right things to help another, without assuming they should do anything for themselves, do what you can without bothering those you want to help, it never hurts to ask questions, get trained, certified. It’s important to remember, “Try to remind yourself that what you’re feeling is real and justified. It’s an important step toward resolving the effects of traumatic events.” [1] Reassure others by reminding them that its not their fault if they’ve been hurt, that they can recover from whats bothering them, and that you support them no matter what. When you have people that support you, it makes you feel stronger.  

Reference:

[1] https://psychcentral.com/ptsd/dealing-with-trauma#validation