Please Read PDF Version (Writing Effort to Speak About Voices Discontinued due to Self Harm and it was Causing me Suicide, so a Book is being Published instead in response to losses, and what reasons Im fought for [dont recognize how these two words are hurtful, you dont recognize my story as true, everythings heart joke, and hurting me has become a joke].

Losing my Battle with Voices

Alternate Book Titles:

My Battle with Voices

A Book About Losing Battles and Overcoming Hardship

A Book About Telling the Truth Even If Beyond Repair

A Story is Not Your Story Until You Tell Your Story

By: Leslie A. Fischman, MSL

Assembled, Written, and Published 09-19-23

Under Oath Submitted to The US Supreme Court

Written by iPhone and in Real Time Emailed (August 22-September 19)

Writer and Creator of:

mymollydoll.com

lesliefischman.com

researchforstudyetc.com

researchforhate.wordpress.com

WARNING:

This book contains a timeline of writings submitted by email, alongside seeking treatment for a psychiatric condition, that worsened, and in writing details the amount of suffering and requirement in writing, to not justify a harm toward me, and also in defense of any harm or repercussion to others. There is no excuse for bullying of any kind, sometimes sharing your story helps to clarify what’s not told through you by others, but by a telling from yourself as to specifically what there is to fear about mental illness, what is left to be cured, and where to go from here. -This book describes how a woman is marginalized, terrorized, bullied, and teamed up on, as a human being, based on being single, or for dating, and in what way are your future prospects destroyed. Who suffers when you can’t do things in life, you do (meaning me), who suffers (when I can’t work) me, who suffers (when I can’t date), who Ive dated or who Ive loved, and who is not proud (upon a punishment and humiliation of me) everyone who knows me. So what doesn’t last (are my moments of returning from mental illness and improved state) and what’s tested again is what mental illness is what it sounds like and what it looks like, and in what way is self-harm a product of being hurt, and until what point is that hurt recognized as difficulty that I’m not responsible for, and in what way are those difficulties viewed as a big picture for blame, and misuse my identity and ability to help post trauma and devastation not be accused of not seeing the big picture. This is a treatment of relevancy to incident, per incident, so what’s never understood is an upset or a suffering by me (symptoms viewed as delusions hallucinations). So what can be done, I think warning everyone of a condition that occurs, not by choice, is a positive way to continue working and coping, without there being some quiet acceptance of me being something I’m not, for that to be the joke as studied or misread, and to stop bringing up what I’ve said as untrue, and focus on what pains now are true and for what reasons, and in what way has insensitivity toward me resulted in description of issues as they are affecting me, and instead of re-evaluating how I’m treated to help others in need of coping strategies and discipline to improve recover, in what way have people changed, based on criticisms, and in what way have I been punished for describing how Im hurt, and what is relevant not, who’s pain or suffering, and which issue, to which population, is a pain or hurt amended by me and prevented, or is a pain or hurt not emended as to me and instead a pursuit of a harm towards me sought in favor of whom.

A pain becomes untrue when people realize what they have done not intended, and a pain that lasts as a consequence of anyone being righted to cause harm, is a belief that anyones difficulty is the same as or not spoken to or above or beyond the means or intelligence of someone in seek of a solution to their mental disturbances in life. Life is something never so mean that anyone gives up in life, and nothing is ever so true about a person, that anyone should be made fun of and for that to be considered the truth that cannot be undone, people feeling good bullying and for that bullying to be supported by others. Maybe that can’t change, but I don’t have to adapt and change my life to make true anything past to explain any suicide death or mass shooting, isn’t resulting from my instability by who is President, it’s about what is connected and why, and in what way does connecting me to incidents I have spoken about to shared about, considered an illness representative of a guilt similar to, anothers crime, would be questioning my lack of sympathy or empathy, having written research papers, and approaching a subject not made inappropriate its by witnessing what Im doing and who that thankfully recognizes and punishing me and forgetting who is thankfully recognized viewed instead of me as protected from the harms resulting in a questioning of a woman’s identity, sexuality, heritage, functionality, and gifts in life.

Introduction

It’s been a grueling 2022, and 2023, and based on real life experience working through disability, overcoming disability, improving, suffering loss, and doing my best to help others, this book is with the hope to illustrate at what point is your life and lifes work, changed to mean something else, and at what point do your feelings outlook and thoughts become less of value how and why. The point at which you are not needed, versus the times in which help is needed, how to know your own limits in life and stopping points, without causing suffering to yourself or others, following along, with expectation for relief and explanation of ongoing, current, and past issues, in what ways are devastations, not of our own making, and in what ways can less be explained, upon losing battles in life, and what does that mean about humans in general, or a person in general upon becoming limited or maxed out or tired.

I think you do you best until your best is done, and until then, you keep improving until all those allowable states of pride and reflection can occur. In the meantime, we all must brace ourselves, through the controversy or elements existing either by news, celebrity, song, film, race, movement, protest, or issue, and while we cannot all represent equally all the cares in the world, we should also not be limited or forced to assimiliate and relate on levels reserved for those specifically represented and supported, each journey is different. I hope that by sharing my journey, you come to support people with mental health issues, instead or punishing people for being on meds or medical conditions that aren’t clear on the basis of genetics or words, considered an appropriate solution for whatever is found to not be normal, there should be no consistent evaluation of any human being based on abnormalities identified in appearance to designate anyone a purveyor of interests for the majority, while sacrificing the interests individually, to fulfill a solution for all, denominate any single human, myself included, to make all or some feel better, there is no legal or scientific proof of designating for worse, or better, to change all or make all better, and the only known solution for making things better, is to be strong, reliable, accountable, hardworking, diligent, honest, truthful, determined, and demonstrate through the recovery of our own interests in maintaining well, make it back in time to also be there for others, struggling.

This book details the road to recovery in terms of negative judgments and how that carries over or throughout your life affecting, and in what ways is a repeated harm endured as a conseuqnece of a negative judgment created. At what point do businesses, lawyers, and doctors not be treated as burdened by the stresses of a life on an individual basis, and mistreat a person by their words, create any scientific end that requires a dimishing of esteems of a induvial (me) to support the integrity of any people, who do not value the words of a person, in what ways do things change and in what ways is meaning lost? Meaning is lost, upon shouting, cursing, saying derogratory terms, and then who do you represent, when everything you are becomes something that you get treated as not acccpeting of others, in what way does non-accpetance on an individual basis, support greater acceptance for others. Whats the formula for paving the way, either you are a human being who serves as a role model to others, in which everyone benefits with a knowing of you or having met you and been around you, or is a worse story or example of lost sought to purvey a circumstances of a person being gone, as a reminder of which losses and negative judgments. It’s not clear at what point people are unsalvageable and in what ways does failing to salvage the best of what makes a person, in search of the worst, illustrate a harm significant or a causing of a harm sought to either an individual or create offense as though a person should be denominated as offensive to others, the opposite of a role model and inspiration.

Who should protect you from things getting worse and who’s ultimate responsibility is that, the person in need of help and getting the help that they need, and that’s never an issue of humor, business name, terrorism, mass shooting, crime, homicide, location, or news story, the element of prevailing wellness in all lies in a preservation of the values and respect given to people organizations and companies, and to continue enthusiasm for the politics overriding societal judgment of people who they do not wish to be represented by government, institution, business, brand, attorney, or doctor, in what way is a person’s subjected to harm upon improving, and who is a suffering owed to. I think voices are sometimes a creation in furtherance of a belief that you are not one among many victims or a victim, and while it is possible for a victim to be made to fight and hurt their peace, this story is unclear as to what does a voice represent “voices historically represent a mental illness delusion or hallucination of hearing a person (a person designated now past or from your life who is believed to be tormenting you) when a voice is believed to be tormenting you (this then designates the person as not symbiotic to others and for a person internally to not process how they are feeling and mischaracterize a person who can hear someone they don’t feel good by and a voice is used to treat a person as guilty or having victims. Voices are used to treat a person as hurt by something considered true that hurts a person at their core, like sexuality, race, education, story, recording, death, news etc., when a person is not valued as sensitive and writing in support of the belief systems of all, is how a person’s story is destroyed to treat a person as though who has met them is a victim to them, and this is done in revese of becoming successful because one is allowed to be known and people naturally read their work by effort and personality that blends well with others, to say that others are not improved or happy for their return to life. Is why a condition of recovered well and able to work is changed to disabled and not able to work, and not feeling well, over the simple preference over who is helping who. When it comes to women if you are not helping women and if you are not paving the way for acceptance not “victim blaming” represent what mental health is about and acceptance for one another, then based on sexuality, the reverse becomes true of who you were, so it’s a judgment of you or challenge or standard that is sought for you to not meet in life, to change you from someone who inspired to someone who causes discomfort. So in the race to make everyone uncomfortable, I was made uncomfortable, and everyone is comfortable, sometimes there is not need for victimizing everyone using one person, to determine comfort or truth, or who is improving by whom. We each do our job everyday to live our lives and feel good, that isn’t possible to occur or be communicated without you making the effort to communicate what could be wrong, and sometimes that’s how things go wrong towards you, its in when what you have to communicate exemplifies sickness, is when you lose your battle with voices, and that’s what causes deletion, when you are upset, when you are unstable, when your head is sick, when you have physical disability, when you are having difficulty speaking, and sometimes that’s what makes others feel better, and when others feel better and uncomfortable, then you are viewed as causing fear to others, and this is when being found out is a outing joke not about sexuality, when a person feels hurt by you who cares for you, and when you are viewed to be the person who does not represent or is the cause of harm or a misrepresentation of another. So the lesson is if you mention, the less you are supported, the worse you look, and as focused on, what’s not prevented, is how you were, its about making things about other women who you never had a problem with, and for non acceptance of you and that’s what hurts. What hurts is that I helped everyone, and wrote online, and then it became a joke about hurting me, and watching me for reaction, and treating everyone else as special and not recognize me. What hurts is that the eventual phase of acceptance is prevented from occurring, based on all the ways in which my determinations of not making things worse, became remembered pointers to revisit what is saved or not saved, because its viewed as non representation, I’ve been hurt, because it was never acknowledged in what way should my feelings matter as not hurt, and to cause me to be hurt, by not supporting me, and that’s unclear in what way, am I made to look bad or others better, and if its to bring up what Ive said, its that in my honesty and by my reactions, disrespected, instead of being valued as a human being, everything I learned, became something about me, I’m expected to know, not react or hurt the same.  

The problem is people don’t feel good when you’re hurt, and that’s the lesson on being hurt, people don’t feel good and don’t feel responsible, and mental illness, is a way for you to be hurt and treat and observe you as someone who either helps themselves and others, or someone who is suffering and is punished based on who or what you’ve said and represented in what way things made better.

Recent Emails August 22 – September 19

“Losing My Battle with Voices” and Deleting my iPhone Notes

And Publishing a Book of Emails While Battling Voices and Mental Illness (Dysfunction)

By: Leslie Allison Fischman

Submitted to the US Supreme Court under oath.

Please Note: I’ve literally been punching my head since leaving the Psychiatric hold (August 22- 29). And shouting from my balcony since the last fire, and have been to the ER three time in the past year.

Ongoing Losing Arguments – Whether I can take a joke, who is defended protected, punished.

Making Humor – Whether I am regarded as not having suffered being hurt or humiliated.

Ongoing Non-Recognition – Who I am improved and whether I am pretty who is a source of normalcy.

Ongoing Punishment – Discontinue speaking to others professionally, based on not being treated as special, and for my mental health to be considered something I expose others to men or women.

Ongoing Issue – Race and its relevance to schizophrenia.

Ongoing Issue – What’s a bad secret versus what is code, what is a concern, however stated.

What is Prevention – What are war issues, what are things people are going to war over, and viewing me.

Ongoing Scientific Experiments – How an epithet is made, how punished, who reverses punishment.

A Harm to All – How a harm to all results, how a harm to all is prevented by non-statement of terms.

How Harm is Caused – How a statement of terms hurtful, in response to terms known hurtful hurt until anything is stated remotely hurtful and then accuse me of being hurtful to who I am  or think is about me.

Continued Disturbance – What occurs before a fire what occurs afterword, and what is religion and wellness for and how are issues prevented not inherited, what shapes a viewpoint, or a person or body.

How Things Look – An angered disturbance is caused due to similarities in defense of an not recognize the issue or difficulty faced by me upon discrimination, and supporting money or women, and hurting me.

Continued Disturbance – When or Why is My Story Known and How Things are Known or Happen.

Unclear – Whats known and what is stated and what occurs based on who is reading is what known.

Experimentation with God – Constantly using me as a speaks as heard, or speaks and is heard not solution, doesn’t recognize that voices occur not writing and writing as solution, so caused, to say that others do not experience wellness through reading so a fight or energy change is started or created to represent fire, or a cause for anyone to now be deceased, and consider a change in what I hold, or weight loss is, so without considering my health and feeling good, is using my words, and in reverse discontinue my improvement by using my words and punishing me with my words, then treat me as something different. Something different is a photo issue, make business or company liable for what people think of when they see me, and wrongfully accuse me of not branding or being someone who creates for absence of mentally ill thoughts or mental disturbances in others, not recognizing writing as a cure for voices.

Public Assembly Emails Written While Battling Voices

After Psychiatric Hold

Text Messages to Psychiatric Hold “Ocean View”

And Hurt and Voices Described in Public

Being Hurt Over and Over Again

Shouted at 6 Times in Public (My Whole Life)

Being Dropped as a Patient 3 Times

Being Let Go from Two Internships (worked for a year, and 6 months)

Using the word “P” to accuse me of being genetically gay.

Using the word “P” to criticize me going on a date on Tinder after Homicide.

Using the word “P” to ruin a reunion date with someone who supported me.

No recognize (low compatibility romantically as a positive sign) of platonic person.

Creating fights between me and three woman, to subject me to hurt and rejection.

Not protecting me and hurting me, who is not privileged and suffering.

Not viewing improvements or investments as helpful to all, cause sickness with.

No stopping when I say stop. Misunderstand a positive portrayal storm name.

Not recognize my effort modeling and fitness time invested in feeling good.

Constant be nit picky and hurt me as watched, like I hurt whos watching me, hurt me.

Not accept my improvement, create conspiracy for death and include me as dying among.

Using the word “P” to blame the death of Lisa Marie Presley on me or “what you think I did wrong.”

Viewing the word “P” as a true and accurate statement of someone from Texas I didn’t contest in public.

Not comprehending it took 3 years to recover from being exposed humiliated embarrassed 2020.

And then misrepresenting self-harm, cause me to humiliate and embarrass and hurt myself, accuse me guilt, or being responsible, of accuse me of enjoying or being well in spite of losses, and wrongfully punish me outside of court, or hold racist judgments toward me, shout in my face, and expect me to take it. So that’s stalking my writing, and failing to recognize how much pain and hurt I take in life that I don’t tell or subject anyone else in the whole world, to believe me or support me, and don’t make fun of my life. Means privacy cant be trusted, and if Im being hurt or killed based on who’s watching, means delete, and that’s not hurtful prevents self-harm and suicide, and embarrassment over issue, not my own.

Email 📧 (21) + archive

Twitter Statements – Important 

Basically we said you can improve your job to figure out how between today or tomorrow … that’s how quickly court support is turned into additional pressure or reminder of something not right about you changed … ultimately whatever was wrong with me visible to others … I can’t change about myself …

Since the bailiff stood up close to me … here’s a Judge a new person a new story new people to present to. And now is my test can an agreement be made and followed without me being hurt or anyone else … and I’m what way do I need to improve not on the basis for what was tough or sounded delusional about … it will be about whos love is schizophrenic … so this is how you get made responsible for others … is how a man is protected … Judge who is strong and bailiff checks you connects (protects her) so by tomorrow share something positive (show up to be open to discussion with new mistakes) and either accept I’m hurt or mistreated as jumps from one guy to the next healthy …. Is testing my tolerance for pain or threat and punishing me outside of court … accusing me of creating for emergency ….

So tomorrow improve accept time lost not speaking to the Judge myself as a result I suffered and learned what life is like being told things accuse me of pretending to help like I’m communicating or managing a project that’s easy to solve by medical records …. Ultimately whatever’s wrong with me makes no sense why you need my medical history … I didn’t ask for an excuse and based on reading my court papers assuming I love who I spoke to for 3 years …. Is accusing me of being inappropriate like you know him better than me accuse me of not taking good care of who I love and act like stealing roles as caretaker is some joke … ultimately if things get worse and I don’t have the money … I can’t complain about what work you did what separation you thought necessary …. Treat me as a homwrecker or low class woman like I don’t represent myself or apart of Asian pride I haven’t even seen you …

Here forward going to focus on why to improve and no matter how long it takes to keep up with or mention anything ongoing of concern (I know I was seen in court today) to please excuse my writing online trying to describe a difficulty making fun of what I recognize as being difficult after lawsuit … is some kind of isolation fear based … to see how do you respond to losing everything or to joke or professional gusto in what way have you been mischaracterized to be someone not worth representing … on the basis of things getting worse after I took my favorite photo during after a 14 days court order hold from pen pals accusing my trauma free face as doing better in court order because I took a nice photo so maybe that’s why I was scrutinized as breaking a rule (how would she know if I’m spoken to him and that’s creating a system of rejection through a woman hired as attorney to treat me like he feels safe talking to her telling her on me – as some kind of who’s stupid or being treated unprofessionally … I published my own work statements myself — if it’s too hard to manage what I am or am not doing and if I’m made to appear like I’m hiring an attorney to manage a crisis I created then that’s subjecting me to being inapproaprpropriate not having viewed what my conversations to him are like … telling me no like it’s to shock me hurt me like I’m someone who loves someone secrets I need to be told who or what’s of value rustled like I don’t know how to treat a man … I can represent myself … my coming to be has nothing to do with anyone’s status as important … so if scaring me asking for more money to reported to treat me as taking to someone who is asking for your help is to hurt my confidence in life and ultimately … no one will understand what causes stupid – what is empowerment what’s offense and what’s unprofessional or waste of my honesty be treated like I don’t manage myself well make fun of what I sound like scared talking to someone who I think is going to help me … is how you get hurt not better ….

Today I accept although a good experience in court … work on staying well think I spent a good two days recent posts back illustrating that I recognize difficulties and tomorrow and with appreciation for some progress made today … show how I plan to improve and after sharing that I have been careful and life’s not a game everyone’s figuring out or learning privileged to or taught … so this is discontinuing companionship missed appearance in court to hear my heartfelt necessity to be privileged to talk to someone I love asked court for permission …

The bailiff came up close to me so he got an accurate read on me would know if something was wrong guilty or not right … when someone who’s job is to protect the Judge, is literally standing in front of you (it’s like getting to recognized as protective respectful …) 🇺🇸🩵

The exotic dancers being supported by a Broadway insurance company USA groundbreaking recognition of women who perform and well enough to model entertain others as belonging to a field of women who are being respected more because of a famous adult business participant who is still recognized for her lawsuit even though her attorney failed she is no longer suffering from misinterpretation … means who is put in jail … is an example of someone featured on Fox News and not hiring me and as a result he represented himself … is a (-) example attorney. Which makes my tire being fixed relevant as to him going down hill and prosecuted … illustrates in what way are successful attorneys being made to look stupid and what would cause them to mismanage funds of a client why would you seize control over money (which makes us rethink what was going wrong how was a bad decision made) I made one call to Omelveny that’s helping and we literally watched him lose his mind go downhill and no one knows why but we believe how easily people can get in trouble. w/Trump ADR liked by both, if there’s no fight toward me recommended to go to keep families together that was the only advice I was given …

Everyone was too high up at her reunion but dressed appropriately was just made aware that my high school has been labeled as funded by Jewish names and endeavor was listed as a job opportunity networking for alumni … always believed in Ari, Mel Gibson was a fair fight because if he was permitted to work again and an example of being banned from performing and disappeared for decades he’s been punished long enough to not make fun of who is motivated to embrace positivity and I don’t think that anyone’s story famous is anything I view myself as not in tabloids like I’m privilege or protected … our paparazzi photos in Malibu walking to sushi were never published paparazzi chased us to a bar mitzvah and wanted a photo … ultimately being special is your only experience managing special … I’m sorry I didn’t rewrite my Dads eulogy I read to him in the hospital by the time we got comfortable talking again … he was more positive enthusiastic about how well I was doing and believed in me.

So today was a long day didn’t take a photo at gas station before I left to court made it there on time lesson is it’s good to keep a record of how you appear when well lesson is no matter what’s up against you in life it’s you and a Judge with more experience witnessing people and based on her enthusiasm for the day if she’s feeling capable that’s a confidence worth sharing and dressed up fun means in spite or relapsing and addressing how life has changed by different treatments … it was helpful to finally be given an opportunity to talk to a DA and a Judge and be allowed to be struggling and it’s okay to care about all the things I’m concerned about reassured that that’s not mental illness so after being given a violation number I was not observed to be violating its to describe to me what type of person is not supported by the courts believed in getting well … in the end being strong on my own and losing a very personal experience in life special while be punished told no and talked to like I keep talking to someone (accuse me of bothering someone to figure out what’s wrong or not staying well a risk of harm or reject joke and ultimately how you get hurt is by what you figure out to be hurtful and why … is the lesson on what court is about if you have a solid understanding of why you were not helped and if you shared privileged information not valued as effort be accused of selecting a DA and pretending to be a victim and make fun of you for being hurt by a fan site accuse you of overreacting is mistreating you as not chill appreciative like you are someone who is made aware or more or less skilled by people you are being mistreated as helped special is how and why someone is treated as stupid or made scared to believe that they are going to jail and to let someone who you’ve hired to represent you misunderstand the issues …. If someone thinks you are going to jail and think’s seeing your medical records is what the Judge needs to excuse something that someone I love has a question with that’s hurting me like I don’t support how he tries to help … in the end it’s my story my faith my purpose destination in life so if one thinks you’re going to jail and hectic on the basis that you’re being scolded for doing something you’re not doing that judge is telling her you’re doing wrong that’s treating you like you talk to someone and be accused of talking to someone and then be made scared see how you feel when you are made to feel caught like attorney punishing you with your forms filmed out makes any sense about what’s necessity for I think … if it’s my condition reputation to fix that’s my job to address losses in what way did I not ask nicely mistreated as some sex experience chat like I think I’m sophisticated rich or important … to privilege someone to care for my case it’s not a losing hand … I’m still alone doing well I’m not guilty and although you may be testing how bad things are to determine guilty by your own metrics your not the CIA and you cannot tell whether I’ve done something wrong accuse me of asking for help … when I addressed court myself in what way did I not present issues relevant to illustrating I’ve been through a lot I am not subjecting who I love to bad luck (or be experimented with head gone) like technical difficulty is a dui joke memory joke …

Who are the immigrants bused here who have traveled her to work (we are in a period loss and risk assessment) Welcome to California (you’re not to your circumstances are are valued) please recognize that CA is state that has been through a lot and recovered and back to normal so disappointment that there’s no work doesn’t mean that you’re too late (work jobs are for people who have access to jobs so maybe network and figure out a system for getting started if you are concerned about where you were bused to and what’s disappointing … you are in an engineering state (people who work from home) I recommend placing adds to run errands do chores be security guards for people in tech I think people will pay for people who are able to travel, please get your shots and avoid mental health issues or drugs … plenty of people who need help. Re: bused immigrants.

What’s not cool is everything wrong with you and trying to solve who is the ultimate force you must face making fun of you being separated from family and friends like you have ever experienced being alone or separated in a way that you have gotten sick ….

No scary lawsuits …. Any bad investment is not a joke over money and therefore I should not be made fun of lose everything or be tested disabled given a hard time a watched driving lost in OC for on time and getting tired and ultimately that shows that if radio isn’t working a phone isn’t supporting you ultimately you have to figure out how to get to where you need to be on the basis that it’s important and what’s too late … I think when it’s your life and you make an extended effort to represent subjects after discussing why relevant without amplifying your blogs or photos or buying followers … ways you can get hurt working hard is when tech doesn’t support you to be treated as a fire joke like giving you a hard time is a recipe to explain any uncle in New York who has difficulty talking ultimately I was thought to enough to think about life totally with respect for who fights for everyone and maybe that’s why I’m fought like I don’t recognize what fighting is for accuse me of making any woman’s life more difficult or be some loser or risk basket case ….

I am Jamie FOXX means although I get made fun of like me being scared isn’t okay or think it’s adderrall or stuff I’m thinking can’t solve is undermining who I am as a person and my entire life so excuse me for not wanting to be used as an introduction to subjects or be made to empathize with those who are facing more difficult transitions in life and not be proud of my mom and all the nurses she helped who cried when she had to close her company and all the people she’s helped and trained means that when have I ever not respected women in my life or had problems – beginning with a boyfriend thinking friendship going out is flirting I think ultimately you get separated from who you’re an adult with and maybe that’s to solve what’s of issue for who attends a better law school is it that you have infidelity is it that you are hurt or possessive is it that you were not pretty in a photo that he was well in taught me that if you don’t know what happened to your face fix it don’t worry about all good photos the gay decorators made your mom take down minimalism not pictures … you know people who are successful and around to help you will be the same people you don’t want to be made to seem like you “don’t show to an appointment after syphallis got a penicillin shot” made fun of Uber driver not taking you to your appointment and you being punished by dr Lim who took care of you when he wants to retire move back to the Philippines and you get questioned as to whether you fear disease or think it’s a joke or make fun of your appointment with no patients present accuse you of becoming people who carry disease say you’ve been exposed to aids hiv Bc of who your doctor is and accuse you of being done dirty by who you’re set up with on Tinder – so that’s working on rekindling things with a friend overtime … and getting voices and taking a cab to the valley to combat what (voices I’ve not written about or sought medical attention for and has caused me to hit my head), so that’s treating me as being told something true or untrue based on what is known about you accuse others of being unhelpful (maybe that’s why you get ignored left struggling) so this is the test of faith am I someone who miss a good opportunity to learn how to represent myself do I miss a chance to help a situation by submitting documents then accused of hiring an attorney like I don’t know what to do or am saying something wrong or am introducing information that doesn’t explain how I could love someone hurt, it’s because my conversation was read and Bc it took a long time to be loving and improve … means based on eric majors who was forgotten all that was memorialized was bumble and that makes me look bad like I wasn’t allowed to try dating not having yet been confronted with mass shootings making fun of a conversation with someone who didn’t trust me with a number not willing to meet up means although we shared genuine cares opened up about membership to Brady and equally frustrated that’s not about sex if I’m working on talking to people … is a threat to me like I create special anywhere I go no I have one campaign and one life and it’s not a game and it’s not confusing or disorganized ….

of my body dysmorphia accuse me of not accepting myself to accuse my first feeling of being grose and ugly why would that hurt Justice Ginsberg’s feelings therefore based on my reaction at her funeral the only one speaking and for a funeral to take place of a woman who was so smart she survived and lived to witness my horse to Ferrari deduction about how much life has evolved that’s very special (it will matter once you are considered as not thoughtful loving caring considerate I think if you’re not strong enough to message with Justice Ginesberg make fyi of your conversation it’s to say that there’s some scrutiny about – my disability existing when or by what disclosures is my recognition of what bad advice is to accuse me or subjecting my friend to being devalued she was always someone who tagged along available it only matters if you become separated capitalize on a problem shared to a friend by text it’s to say a problem has gotten worse to accuse you of thinking women are speaking poorly of you is why you get made to look crazy and get treated as unimportant or will be until you’re uncomfortable experiences I’m life get misunderstood as genetic or accuse you of watching material or having experiences sexuality by yourself (I think there’s beings a Virgin) I think that there’s looking pretty in photos I think there’s losing friends I think when collected all the bad can be used to say you’ve not changed for the better by being alone not being social and not smoking weed or drinking in what way is your life supposed to help who knew you in life would be to illustrate that I’m not the cause of recording losses or insensitivity be made fun of and since schizophrenia and disowned were issues brought up to me to not mention. Then respect that who I care about wants me to move forward on the basis that those losses shouldn’t not have occurred (and calling bazelon means I’m aware that people should not pass away due to any medication or lifestyle circumstance) and that showing a picture from jail doesn’t mean I’m not cool for not hooking up with major it seems like (it’s a constant test of whether I am important patient or a Judge who is vulnerable to me and how can I help others by recognizing that they’re interested in talking to me about a difficult loss, and unwilling to accept that someone with disorder or meds who I recommended wlac not my doctor (don’t accuse a Filipino doctor as being the shocking fact about about life or make fun of his poster loves you loves you not, if I get tested and vaccinated and have dated nice men I’ve never had experiences in life like I’ve not been helpful or insensitive to others …. When you get told what to do like you don’t know what to do that’s how you get treated like you are going to jail making fyi of your faith retaliate on you how would you feel if we’ve been having meetings and court appearances without you paying money for work being done without talking to me is some kind of introduction to a concept making fun of who I love as proud and treating me like wellness sexuality is a joke or a club of people who are made to trust eachother or accuse me of liking someone by face at a crime scene, I already knew his name messaged him to be in OC I recognize cspan as who’s I’m charge so that’s making fun of me reporting something like I think I’m in charge observant

At my high school reunion someone shared their memory of my father he was heroic was called out of bed to be notified that people breaking into my house the night I had a kickback never sure how that happened or why a brick was thrown into my classmates house car window and what that means about life. It’s everything of value I keep everything doesn’t get lost or stored means if I’m experiencing disappearing ruined things of value means I was upset my moms storage got flooded water ruined my notebooks from college (true story website with school work campaign save everything data losses I feel like happen to people who seem like they have a lot or are smart going on a momentum of things being good a true test of characters occurs like today even if no one will help you phone is giving me a hard time need directions to court doesn’t mean life will happen any better or worse being on time there’s no lesson in what talking to a DA is like you learn once privilege is and that’s your first opportunity sharing your concerns without going through anything you haven’t spent all night thinking of everything you have lost Bc of who you are and then being someone capable of making things better even if you responded poorly to who tries to help you or convinced you that your freedom was tough to negotiate requires some medical proof of something to prevent you from going to jail … as far as I’m concerned no medical records or health status education was questioned or my outfit (I went bold as a model who now hooks up and doesn’t bother who gives me love shows I’m a responsible busy woman … I think driving 100 mph to court lost frustrated lost and then ending up on freeway in right direction finally meant that speeding will not get me there any faster if I was on time and too late … if I get to court today … I can complain email attorney and that’s my first experience being hurt and punished like I’m stupid or let in bad connections or demons and I’m tired of being made fun of for caring for my mom I have known her my whole life and remember when she was supportive excited about reading my book and finally something we could talk about recognizing that she was not able to publish her book … this doesn’t mean that anyone’s book or editor is being made fun of for work done to work on a book with my mom which I’m sure was therapy and I think I read through it briefly wanted to send to sydney before my suicide attempt 2009 in a santa box that copy went missing and my moms copy in binder (so this is being studied … this is how a period in time in which you have wanted to study the past or who’s relayed to the case see what people think about it is not the problem what is the problem is what you are suddenly not well by or not cool by what is wrong is by what you want to know more about … so this is how honest handwriting 

 in West Hollywood making fun of the first time I processed with my friend the loss of her mother and now attending law school and being relayed as message from her father is making fun of me having work experience as a crisis hotline counselor making fun of my research paper like I didn’t write it thoughtfully use work that a deceased naropa student donated to the crisis hotline I was organizing a garage sale for, please don’t make fun of my effort to get funding from neighborhood known for philanthropy as a law student who visited scotus and having time to volunteer try to help and learn how to help this occurred 2015 living in Santa Monica after I left my job – to make light of me losing my job to a company based on my brief interaction with BBDO and they won an award recognized that being aware of who’s out there helping and keeping track of a marketing thing is important later in life when people want to know what or who are you successful  for what have to showed about yourself being strong caring about your body which was much bigger plus size compared to women now it appears regular sized so that’s making fun

That was are you real loud and proud confidence test – who are you alive for who are you going by no of course if everyone’s is doing their best and if I’m sure of my commitments in life …. Means I’m recognized as caring preventative and concerned or detailed in a way that no one is made to look bad feel bad or be punished by me … so if I was viewed as don’t talk to him, and a 3 word agreement and shares to my attorney mean that I am well because I didn’t take risks I made friends in public carefully I didn’t need to do drugs I can say no if I’m being support friend connected to cops and they made a checkpoint the night I was driven through by a suburban they know who found me at a bar to let me know he’s been attacked in what way (am I not reliable or anyone who doesn’t belong gets beat up or not recognized as beautiful).

The beach run was your first reaction to getting and recognize that you have health insurance and let no code of comprehension of who or what messed up critique a quote negative doubtful of womens fate like I didn’t write over it Bc picked a quote with s doomed fate in what way should I be criticized as having doom or gloom or accuse me of being anywhere knowing I look bitch making fun of what going to a bar preferred by by an older brothers friend that smelled I complained in what way am I not cool for going out after bumping into my brothers friend showing him my boyfriend and in the bar a guy came up to me and stayed singing what’s gay or too old for what bar scene … if a boyfriend was introduced to a girl who was nice to me don’t accuse me of knowing why I would meet one person, who was mature with my boyfriend and most intimacy on the basis of in what way should I have experience with another woman being nice to a man I like only two people in the world other than Qs who know me. Being forced to walk everywhere doesn’t make you a cool person I got lucky meeting someone nice I’m sorry if that looked cool or Bc of looks or money I’m not given money and I wear regular clothes and am myself so this later version of a woman is about modeling going for professionalism …. That means I deserve a wage so please don’t accuse me of affecting the significance of Juneteenthnpr being a great example of someone who works who isn’t recognized to work and when work you’re proud of expects for it to be described in a way that someone can bit or or a woman can recommend to another I think innocent moments when I was put on meds was not performing sure about blogging and new to fighting and new to knowing my facts and appearing in court and know to improve for the judge that’s having faith that if I do as I’m told it won’t matter who I love or what I was important it means if I recognize a solution to be well to help others that means I was allowed to talk about my problems on twitter and challenge mentally that requires me to think and putting it into words again what I’ve thought what decisions I’ve made to show how and why I am strong and not haphazardly online risking or gambling with my health, I think I took a gamble agreeing to not talk to who I love without defending myself and make the extended effort to improve and overcome doubt as to racism covid recognition of harms or where hard on you is coming from and to show up with your life practically a mess and journaling starting over sobriety … and making the decision to get well and stick to an oral agreement made in court with a Judge who’s enthusiasm deserves a fair share of credit for stating well and also recognizing that I’m not one to let anyone be hurt based on something I can fix myself ….

I’ve stayed home haven’t worked based on working on being in a place I can work for family it’s unfortunate if you get bullied look bad or tech issues that just makes you look bad or scrutinize you like you’re future is ruining if you get judged as ant take care of self accuse you of being a joke daughter of a doctor accuse you of getting sick to mischaracterize you dad as guilty to read into what my family was like I became louder and didn’t complain about losing things or being robbed ultimately those are ways you get hurt made to look like you have an issue (so that’s how you go from having pictures with friends) to Jay Z making a “black album” in common to your black photo album to make fun of you as robbed by people who are celebrities represents schools you’ve overheard a producer in common is not to highlight what about the past is not what’s wrong with me or what life is like (no one can communicate to you what’s wrong with you) until you have a problem (with how people communicate) I don’t think talking about upbringing is helpful when if my brother is being made sick and if this was a sick plot to accuse my family as being dark or accuse anyone of having oases who was not cared for or make fun of an effort made through bazelon whatever there was to remember you for doing well (going out of your way to care) ultimately after being hurt it will be up to me to prove again that I care and to what extent until bullying stops. Judge helps by giving you time to get well that doesn’t mean that things will be instantly well Bc the judge hopes that I improve I recognize I have no one to talk to that’s my loss (that relationship can’t be replaced) and based on what the Judge said (think how am I going to show that I appreciate having my life be difficult losing everything and to be credited for appearing well — after all that’s been said (in the end how to appear to a Judge who sees tons of professionals attorneys law students knows what criminals are like has witnessed what is provocative ghetto or appeared to be wrong with you sexuality to make you appear like you are showing yourself to prove what, if you’re ever struggling and go out of your way to let your guard down and be judged know that it’s not by who admires you it’s by who is proud of you that’s where trust starts and Judge so that’s the lesson … at least a few people want me to get well.

I’m lieu of losses to not appear like I’m going through anything challenging selfish be viewed as not choosing to be fun I was equally lost by music on radio unresponsive on my way to court … that was a struggle why I started sharing how I was gifted CDs by Michael Jackson and why being an adolescent in a special home and saved Polaroids was a good experience (although I crashed a golf cart and lost driving privileges), ultimately what bad occurred for someone sued for molestation is to hurt me like I’m being given a position of trust accuse me of studying life coaching and not being responsible to take care of another woman to harp on who’s taking care of who to punish me like I’m taken care of accuse me of being suddenly successful like I would go through anything and make any woman have to make an effort to be positive who believes that something good should happen and based on the Judge appearing more confident than me, that’s my first agreement in court …

Solution (take the risk state something you think is important) either you find yourself in a better place able to show how a solution can be made for a problem with problems by sharing all day under pressure after ER things being worse untilmately if the Judge doesn’t see you as displaying mental illness in court doesn’t mean your gone belong in jail or think schizophrenia is some excuse or medical records to keep you from jail treat you like you accept a diagnosis undergo treatment like that’s system of disability (I think when you are made to be scared – another atttorney believes in you based on you story doesn’t feel like you’re the problem too late or what’s unforgivable about disability in life or have conversations you’re made to be scared of made fun of like anyone tells you what to do when you’re told you’re going to punished have done something wrong …. This is my first agreement with a judge in words to not talk to someone I love so far things are difficult I will have to arrive to new solutions online I’m front of everyone based on recent relapse tested like I think solution is a joke so this is the basis of being recognized as not hurtful (getting sick by the end of the day) just means I’m not well like I was on time to court … being prepared for court is a big deal I’m not teaching coaching I don’t have experience with representing myself or other issues or have bad easy time being treated like I don’t respect the community being who I am getting arrested is accusing me of not belonging in Hollywood or advising me of being investigatory or hurt by no one was cool by the bar I brought my sister to, in the end if I don’t feel good or have a reaction punished a wall and broke my bracelets that shows I’ve reacted to a challenge about what being wrong with me that my sister has not approves of is making fun of me as being small by my sister I immediately knew after Aaron and self harm not moving forward in life those were acknowledgements of my family that doesn’t mean they are responsible for bullying this is beyond interpersonal childhood uprearing has been misunderstood to be dysfunctional or accuse me of not being a good student into school and prude by virtue of not being ready things don’t happen for you until someone touches you so that’s how you learn about sexuality it’s not a big deal … later is only matters based on why disrespected and made a beautiful website and had a beautiful career and it’s sometimes to treat you as though you are sheltered or not strong enough for fame making fun of you for qualifying for career modeling not based on beauty but Bc you’re fun to be around and great to see you pretend your important in spite of what you bullied by would be a good goal .. maybe not acting … this pressure on where I’m ending up in life should only matter based on in what way is me not moving forward affecting anyone from my life who would want me to move forward accuse me of living a life that can be recreated or making fun of the moments when I made nice videos and for whom accusing me of not working hard or being a starfucker … before kobe Bryant all I knew about modeling is that with Facebook app (not messed my face wasn’t hard to look at), was pushing myself to walk everyday lose weight the model after working on addressing my obesity I was huge compared to who I was fir and a much larger size than I’ve ever been in my whole life …

When who came around me gets used to judge me as guilty or not that’s what a Judge is for … in what way does living life make things occur positive or badly for others what is luck good protection a winking hand and an easy win versus what is something taken challenging that you should wonder about… I’m not worried about the future the kids are fine (so long as I’m working doing my best then the Judge can witness what solutions are we arriving to and how are things getting better). Although I was punished today made tired appear lost driving freeway I wore a bright clip to proudly say the issue I relapsed on something bright and guilty of there being something wrong with me now Bc I did cocaine and cocaine is being used as known reason for rejection or thinks not working out … I think when your mind is busy and your doing lines and someone writes a song from your neighborhood who works in town and older than you … please don’t make fun of my experiences being rejected … ultimately who was chill with you I remembered looked out for me, that was a unique experience being in a bar when another tired to fight me happened to know the bouncer (in what way would I ever be viewed as men from my life) in what way have I not been chill with men be misdiagnosed as trying to make friends to be cool be picked that’s not what being friends is about ::: it’s about being viewed as professional and that’s why I get followed by someone who I invited to a golf tournament and everyone thought that was gay.

I had briefly hung out with Aaron one night it was a night when we talked about both discontinuing having sex thought he was lying to me told me something private about his diagnosis … ultimately I was humiliated on the basis of who gave me carcinoma cancer and for my life to be questioned as dirty which a schizophenia diagnosed me as not able to care for myself dirty, making fun of my experience dating sober and treating me like I left change no the OJ story is in the news this is challenging on the basis that after what I went through now they’re going to free him, that’s treating me like I’m a joke hospitalized when he’s released like I am privies to a reaction of others … it’s I wrote the motion, I’m not a disability joke.

I’m sorry I said I’m marrying someone other than who I’ve been intimate with working on getting to know eachother again it’s taken time nothing happens overnight. If you’re a different person ..  more power to you and to those who accept you in a different states not worried about how difficult dating is or talking so don’t make fun of me being nervous dating who I’m dating,

So I got hurt on the basis that I wasn’t recognized as being beautiful or accusing me of noticing a woman in particular by face then be accused based on my study of a Orange County inmate freed be made fun of based on looking at article and taking a good picture since when is that formulae for representation … therefore if there no science to it and if I’m not a test for whether I’m not cool with with someone carry judgment or don’t mix is hurting me on basis of who is made to be compatible unread by me treating me as having people in my spaces who I can’t tell or am not changed by ultimately people take personally if you you get sick so that’s the lesson I’m dating — dressed to the nines in Gucci heels seems stupid but later when you look like a douchbag in a vest make fun of you speech or will be by what’s unattractive by you so that’s making fun of you wearing hats and misdescribing you being feminine with hats as some change discovery in a picture with a bear be accused as being masculine or cocky like you have something of value that’s not your own what made you feel inclined to wear a hat …. So this is how leaving a stable relationships being fight being hurt gets misused to illustrate how your life was ruined by one person who loved you prosecuting you to accuse you of having had experiences in life you’ve described or empowering people like that made him tough and you not you didn’t survive not successful to accuse me of doing nothing or not being professional …. Is how sharing painful fight becomes a painful lesson in how you are made to look stupid and that’s what what ended your relationship after break visiting us Supreme Court … I think exploring life isn’t being with anyone else … and shouldn’t accuse me of not being with Barack visiting scotus I am well aware of my story my memories what I have experienced in life to know how I’m belong by visiting my textbooks (whether it’s a joke about me or them) ultimately they wanted to meet me court was held in session I thought it was just a tour so that was my only rock show experience went from studying loved law school to now suffering (Bc I took notes made fun of for what my mind was like accused me of being raped before visiting scotus no that occurred after scotus when I flew back and that’s when I was hospitalized February …

Day one no one to talk to. 🩵🇺🇸

No companion zero teamwork. 

Here on my own writing with careful clear reference to terms used to make sure nothing stupid perverted is happening recognized death penalty is a the treatment of who people designate as not super your accuse you of being guy like you crown men or women (accuse you of having a dull of respect accuse you of not be respected or taken care of make fun of what life was like with friends) I supported friends through their own struggles why would I ever pretend to be a woman I’m not and think that being beautiful is about face or act like I know what love is or improvement let’s not learn the hard way so in an effort to accuse me spreading schizophrenia it’s to treat me as needing to say something to highlight a memory from rehab (making fun of me or recognizing a blue bird) making fun of a woman who I stayed away from and didn’t speak to on the basis of self harm (later bc she hanged her night dress) wasn’t insulting to me personally on the basis that I have outfits so this is using that story to describe me as being nude on a website before rehab accusing me of being gay or called pervert housed with a woman not my choice.

Will probably work on feeling better tomorrow today I concentrated on everything wrong challenging to not get wrong with others and this is to illustrate that ER is not a joke pretending to have worked hard or in my mind things are too much … ultimately what can be solved will be based on what the Judge thinks and if I’m lucky get to share my analysis based on my experiences bullying and illustrate how my story or assembly of facts to allude to self is not an Allison middle name fear of being doomed as far as I’m commented if you’re bad you’re going to suffer and die and be punished ….therefore Bc people were more concerned about about in what way is my diagnosis mean I get things wrong or people wrong … is mistaking my confidence as thinks wants me that’s having seen me nice then treating me like I think I’m hot or didn’t work hard anorexic running battling body dysmorphia … please don’t call me pervert like I would notice another woman’s body and have a body that I don’t like after seeing me achieve a different body type was unique not fasting running as you can see 130 lbs and no shape is a joke about “who was treated as grose” it’s I was punished for getting sick by not being responded to (was what was shared) so that become a reaction or skill that you get treated for when someone reaches out to you and offers you a ride home and told no and rehab director is considered a bad idea listen mom I’m chill no one is trying to have sex with me no one has accidentally hurt me I was dating nice men didn’t meet, not preferred was men I loved willing to cohabitate that will never be found again like ___ moved back to Texas whatever the voices jokes is to treat you like you separate people from who they love based on your awareness to not mistreat based on who talk to reject the others then treat me as talking different, it’s whatever I recognized and loved for … wasn’t kept Bc I keep getting voices,

Paris Hilton ruined her book to mention a rat with balls running up her driveway actually I stayed on the side of my house for as long as I didn’t feel well and there was a rat that would run by and $hit where my chair was please don’t make fun of my short experience recording nature or bugs whatever you keep a record of will be important to you one day maybe not to who’s watching thinking you are creating likeable content as though you are privileged special more so than others is why anyone would experiment with their peace being protected and with risk of disturbing your peace on the basis of prosecuting you as not forewarning to stop so bullying by family (is deserved if you’re at fault) if you break your sisters car window is why she steals your cat and got protected windows so that’s how I responded scared. I forget if I told her that I broke her window, anyways my car was taken and got in trouble which teaches you why you are given voices made to question who is smart and constantly treated like you care or concerned over who is doing well … it’s not a system I’m competing with if it’s about going to law school and not subjecting my family to harm including inquiry as to their choices or who’s made fun of …. I think ultimately when I get in trouble lose respect it’s to test to see what I’m successful by how much to have gone wrong how challenging is life until I cheer up and what will be enough to explain why being ignored given a hard time … again in court “it is what it is” ultimately we know who I am and you know who he is so the judge knows who she is, once you are tested for empowerment or whether people feel stupid by you making fun of how you were loving … one day there will be no recipe for love anyone can follow share like you’ve figured him out he figured me out and you punished me like love or sexuality is about sex looks or being an attorney … love is about things being good with the other (and that’s what takes 3 years of improving for). So if that’s the standard then start improving beginning for a Judge … then work on who is motivated ending up anywhere successful for who or deserved by what.

You should be proud of women are so smart put together that they’re winning their lawsuits against President Trump, it’s a great story about independent women who survive things struggle and for anyone to think nude jokes is my mind being drawn to her line of work I’ve not performed accuse me of being curious about other women … I’m focused on myself ask anyone in a room I have presence maybe that’s a survival skill in a room where I’m dressed up late called police before I crashed means I need back up gps if I can’t drive anywhere I don’t know the freeways could get lost that shows how sure my I was 2013 traveling drove alone to Palo Alto those are memories of when you were strong able … I think bc punished was to say I can’t travel and put in jail was to make fun of me or my experiences in life – the police I repeat have nothing to do with anyone you know … I repeat in the event that family thinks you’re gone on meds (do your best to show you’re of value not a pill head sick on purpose) then that will be a fight you get made fun of for …. When Dad mentions <the normal button> that’s highlighting something my dad said to accuse me of something wrong with me titled as (though I’ve learned anything from my Dad) I lived away from my family studied and until the day my Dad died I kept my life suffering or bullied separate from them … missing dinners stayed in my room … how much improvement does it require to be positive with Dad again … would be to address a loss on a street leaving your car in front of one medical for your experience before rehab be made fun of as though you would witness things not reported it to police that’s being accused as taking it seriously that you’re self harming making you seem like you have a path or guided to make decisions (it’s whatever recommended at one point) life is completely different bullied so hospital was laughable beard laughter and later rehab seemed like a joke … no disability is a joke you are never anywhere to experience life automatically improve feel good upon leaving dad to be proud you stopped taking adderall …

The Judge’s presence was confident to know that there will be solution found if I can meet her expectations follow a rule  improve (I had no idea who my Judge was). But I dressed like how I’m treated I actually love politics Instagram and coming from my story was special —- how quickly you can be dismantled treated as dirty or guilty it’s sad how people feel about who’s fault is what and since when is liability on people who speak to you ,,,, if you’re attacking me and no one is attacking you rare instance I was punished (modeling appearing well) is how worse is shown it’s by you being comfortable and based on that being quality about you taking good photos it just fueled photography shaming (pride in a good photo) at what point is sexuality about how you look, when people want to see you by chat or photo (it’s never a good idea) to risk being watched and get hurt …. So that’s not talking about your partners sexuality health or changes managing your life and living a good life that they shouldn’t be subjected to not shining is why I was made to appear obese and face changed accuse of not being supportive of who I love by physical changes …. Ultimately these are phases in life (as a public figure) you learn that sometimes what can’t be said is communicated to all as being the problem (so if it’s whether I cared or didn’t care enough) it’s not me sick by who I loved (concerned like that’s a pattern) that’s recognition of a crime in his neighborhood and him going through changes he didn’t want me to work, so you won’t know where you belong or where you will do well leaving something you’re good at to work show that you know how to earn money … and whether that’s a way forward for you or not needing to focus on finals … later becomes a fishy question about your resume short term (I had over 200 hours community service law clerk couldn’t applied for an award at cal state bar) so that was working hard and later not being able to work and attend law school. I’ve noticed that where I belong or do well at people won’t understand why I’m still in law school layer by age 38 you learn that how you talk about life is what people think of so speak to your passions in life and don’t let any change in course be a lesson over what’s important or of issue. It seems like a later membership to Brady made me seem like I had an understanding other than being disabled myself or suffering of what causes you speak inappropriately … 12 steps in to write in private given my experience with 4 th step and being made to feel bad about myself it makes no sense why later in life I would be able to date or expected like it’s not something people would want to know about me. Ultimately after becoming famous people want to know (why would people hook up with you and question your value based on diagnosis. So when your brain is ruined and you’re made to feel small it’s making fun of who you are as a person accuse you of being feminine online or making up a personality unreal not you (is how u was treated diagnosed permanent disability) if I’m writing to help others as a woman and if you’ve read my resume at what point do I appear to be anywhere in life because of what jobs I’ve had or helped … life becomes strategy once you can’t get a job and it’s a Shlep to apply and meet standards … so that’s doing well in blogging and punished as schizophrenic mistreated like you hurt women or are gay and molest people accuse your personality as being sexually inviting or pretending to be pure and (creating a base or person for blame for sickness) it’s when you are not recognized as being a good friend people experiment question changes or lack of asserted feminity as something being perverted about you or secret wrong with you (in the end the meds affect how you look sound and what people think of you, and if day meds are to be smart and if smart is not the problem it’s accusing you of being different personality type or advising you of lying or using meds to perform

Explain why the police forgave you relapsing you and how you got them to follow you walking (if you did drugs you’re then guilty of something so it was important once I’ve done something wrong have a guilt or secret that makes me look bad for police to check on me).

Free Trump on basis I was mistaken for fake princess treated as pervert punished for modeling and not making friends easily with women … and if he is an actual wealthy politician being accused of having sex with women who are now suing him for damages (I’ve not made any arguments about how hook ups get paid and haven’t lived long enough to know why Trump is being charged) and as far as I’m concerned I’m being faced with a similar positive lesson that when you seem concerned about your reputation and consider another being recognized for having had an intimate experience with someone who is now President (no one recognizes her to be talking about sex) or accuse me of being picky over leadership it’s not fun to be made fun of when I was once helpful and it not being about gay her story stood out on the basis of the attorney she picked and he was punished (of anyone is steadfast on prosecuting anyone in power admired of rape) is why later he lawsuit is still recognized but highlighted for a less controversial charge is a serious offense for a woman previous to sue, it’s not about making fun of people as characters to set up trap put in jail mistreat, she’s still in court on the basis that she struggled and her truth is important to illustrate that his attorney was home arrested it’s not a trendy concept “hush concept” love made known is not making it trendy to love anyone who’s a DA, again my mistake for making the effort — so it’s not about who shined who was who ultimately it’s about who’s in power a politician and it’s better to be faced with what you’ve done wrong … not defending him is managing my own crisis (is a hard lesson on feeling apart of, you won’t know what “creative arts game energy life teams are about” if you sound caught up in stupid stuff if that’s the quickest way to being rejected it’s not about who’s who. Ultimately I am who I am I shared my story I made the effort I should not be punished and things should not go haywire for him, as someone I love (and of people don’t see the value in love) I can try today to accept agreement with the judge. Get well and then think about why a steady relationship was blamed …

Court let me care about everything … goal is to improve (short window to respectfully and in an orderly way discuss things unclear made clear on the basis to offer hope (to illustrate that it’s not who things are about in harms way) it’s when you forget to mention what you think is difficult and simply let people be proud of who they are the less power you give away to others to dictate or punish or worry why you are changed ultimately if someone is improving that’s a blessing (it’s unclear how I was made to look undeserving of who loved me picked me). Settling down is not the mistake. Getting sick after doing well I guess normal struggle after rehab (not a strong student not feeling good about yourself) everyone who’s positive toward you is a good memory … being alone and being positive and having no one maybe is why people reached out to you. In the end what you’re capable of would do well in if it was blogging thought I could do a paid job writing wasn’t viewed as helping me since I was doing well writing, not doing well doesn’t mean I’m too late or working on a project that is failing or need to experience failure to know when to quit or why it was recommended against … whatever my life is it is this way how I’m coping … maybe without therapist and pen pal now … but I’m sure the recovery time is the same (being in court) is a serious experience in life it’s not a joke about where you are or stay in life and why since you were punished once you are many years later taken through court for a year to be treated as though that solves what’s gone wrong … if being successful writer or published well known was viewed as too much or not believed life coach then this is how I’m being put to the test in what way is music hurt as made to recognize anything to cause them to give up without explanation warning … please don’t make fun of how I help or who blocked me @EllenDeGeneres she wore blue pants means although I was working not shocked by her losses … that wasn’t a joke or a consequence or something being so wrong with me or doing well anything suddenly changed in anyone made them give up. (Today we learned what’s not said becomes the torment bullying self harm making fun of you or you’re awareness for being chased when little hitting my head into the tile – sensitive story about who I am as a person didn’t handle bullying well).

Hospital is not a place you throw people when you’re done with them, I think based whatever I’ve been through if you portray yourself as a whore (as a long system fe runner, making fun of yourself hitting head into a wall 2016, the later 2018 making fun of yourself as someone who is loved thrown into a walk is making light of what happened to my head it’s not glamourizing sex or “being done” is not a joke (in the end … the less you make things about life – leave others unaffected) maybe later they’ll appreciate you for being strong and like all women can come to accept one another as although proper or sheltered each woman endures crazy things in life … everyone gets treated as stupid … I think we are somewhat clear on what rape is … and unlike the past without apps and concern for faces …. My face matters as to what about sex. #santamonica running.

I’m a Weho womens meeting with straight women local (why I shop at Abercrombie it’s the only place I need to appear well in life). Just wasn’t attending. I was doing so well that a woman who embraced a more masculine look was wearing a hat I think it was yellow, and thinking to myself ok good the theme is still helpful there’s still hope and support for other ways to highlight support. In a meeting of women I would be one of the stronger people there on the basis of staying well not being high and that’s to the benefit of a meeting when people are inspired by recovery … I’ve never joked about life strength weakening being stronger has never been my issue until faced with schizophrenia … damage that’s permanent would be if anyone was offended or changes by me affected by my blood type genetics presence … I stopped engaging online … work through voices then rethink whether to perform online right now …. Im more concerned with people complaining and Im already in court so I can’t afford to be questioned as someone who made a blog targeting mental health people like I went through anything in life common easy or not having experienced solution.

Who’s not successful confident and a woman since when of all people am I being mistreated as gay or gay incentive or changing women in a way that causes them sickness or mental illness (since when is sexuality a joke) or gay a club (when considering people’s health). Ultimately schizophenia is not what West Hollywood needs having survived AIDS and multiple epidemics and no lesbian clubs or bars exist which would mean if it’s not my path in life and wanted love from a man I will not find love elsewhere not on the basis of what I seem like to women the guy or feminine doesn’t entitle anyone to act like they know about life or what men are about … ultimately who disrespects you becomes your problem to reinforce and correct —- that’s a lesson on who’s strong and why I’m not strong (so it’s ok therapy stopped) forgot as a woman online made fun of that who I am empower people to liven up see myself as apart of and forget whatever lesser life or face change they sought to accuse me of having something inappropriate about me in response to a woman seated next to me I was drinking … obviously made friends better with a guy … so that’s being treated as pervert when you’re hot it’s so hot sees you doesn’t know what happened to you to make fun of you “being in need” making fun of my definition of pervert (calling it schizophrenia later in life take off day meds), and it’s to prove what about acceptance … no one can help you if you blog and there’s crime and you’re working had few delays on time to work (that’s not hospital my bottom) dating is not my bottom, being old enough to try dating older now that I know to be careful of what I look like and him too, shahs suddenly not cool about me … is the connected pride (in you’re gonna do good work and no one will be shamed for being famous or any career type) and I was going to be the one person who could’ve been retained as as an aide and instead exposed as a “sell out” whats not cool about you lesson (what you cannot control done to you) is when scared about people being upset no reason and concerned about family living disciplined life running at night … in what way does subjecting me to being hurt let someone accidentally believe I’m an offender and use my body type to characterize what an offenders body looks like is so demeaning to be criticized as used up or made fun of when I get picked (no woman is rejected Bc of me accepted) therefore my identity is not running counter to any woman’s recognition of their beauty.

I get picked and created a look that flatters me people noticed without looking as perfect feminine as others accepted in my stages that was brave of me to share not knowing how to get a good face day building acceptance for it.

One day someone will write a book about women and friendship and how I recognized theme of importance to my Mothers story … was later used to mistreat me like what my Mom went through was “paraia” seems like no one lived through the 90s and wasn’t included in being heard … so I wouldn’t understand why I’m told I’m something to not speak as though I’m inappropriate … so let’s get down to what is a paraia (OJ) and who is not a paraia (ME) therefore what’s not funny (USC) don’t retire Leslie my only special football experience … sometimes based on what others think needs to happen to (figure out what’s wrong with everyone is a dangerous psychiatry experiment convincing me I’m sick for the sake of specific types of people to improve) so when mental health is used to judge you physical health look demeanor as a short shoes service joke it’s mistreating you as being asked to leave or not belonging disruptive …

One day someone will write about schizophrenia and why services were expanded to individuals in life and explain how we’re they made to feel better without excluding me from being publicly identified subject of a term that no one else has been called forget me suffering with no explanation of “what’s too much” made to think less …

It takes 10 years of writing to prove you’re smart enough that people from other countries read your work that takes years to provide anything of quality which means it’s helpful interesting to others struggling to help everyone … in the end I was not allowed to be recognized as smart based on how I’m feeling or who my friends are … having friends can help prevent voices … unfortunately a problem continues without knowing how to defend myself or figure out what about me was I being punished for … who’s not in my life … or for not knowing how voices are caused …

Please don’t make the war in Russia about making fun of my drawing 2014 or scary experience (I was never anyone so figured out or not working in support of politicians that anyone with money would be threatened by me) being scared isn’t a game of survival that makes you street smart or tough — I think I recorded it Bc I was able to run away scared and called police to report to them who scared me, so that’s a lesson on how fragile you are as a person … in the end you’re hurt (so next time explain that to who I love and that’s how you get treated as stupid) … so if she’s winning lawsuits please don’t interrogate a person capable of bringing suit in court of illustrating a like stated fact about my drawing “Micah” to make fun of back zipper ANGL pants or cocaine like I’m easy stupid no it’s one time “asked can I put a finger in” and told him no I have a boyfriend. Then I was mistreated as cheating or dirty like Micah gave me HPV Carcinoma Cancer.

Stop the war in Ukraine I drank vodka, I’m 1/4 Russian, and relapsed almost lost my smarts reacting poorly saying stupid things with new friends … means … GERMANY has found faith in the necessity for something cooler to happen to avoid explaining Russia by making fun of my story and accusing my Ex Boss of not being Pulitzer idea worthy connection of or wasn’t a goal of mine why would I be shocked by her effort to create work Pulitzer recognized. Destruction isn’t power it’s permanent losses due to lost goals and out of control fighting (it makes no sense to me why trained soldiers would attack eachother) and then use me as though I’m unaffected or unsupportive … if I fight China that’s condemning supporting Russia (and if I refriend the g20 summit rejectee who publicly met with Barack Obama twice when he wasn’t confident means that) who’s recognition of rejection and not viewing that to be a big deal means … that Instagram photo of world leaders looking at me (actual meme) either you care moved by people caring concerned by devastation or you are someone improved that has recognized and maybe needs to recognize again and start listing all the major difficulties and things gone well in spite of … and not be used as a poor example of not providing solution accuse me being complicated thinking face is about genetics or money or meds … if you don’t trust my heart then that’s why I stopped performing online (pervert prevention sex gender identity prevention). — If there are things to talk about challenging NOW IS THE TIME on the basis that there was a shooting in Carson, so if kids are becoming victims to gun violence —- maybe instead of focusing on rejection and how an offender is made maybe start thinking about things that have been fought argued by adults who have struggled and make sure nothing difficult is left with the kids to fight about (sounds like I know my place without having to cause or create for disturbance in self or others) sounds like that was a fun fact about my childhood later tormented … court sees me improving … lucky to be alive (so that’s discussing difficulty since 9:00am on my way to court lost since addressing personal challenge making an effort to help the radio who is unclear of what court is about (I didn’t know what it was about or what I could talk about until I showed up) luckily I didn’t appear as described by others.

She said “she doesn’t see a mental health issue present today.” #proper just barely made it after being social … be viewed poorly … (I’m sorry if court can’t provide the solution sought or punishing me for) … I was honest giving and loving … a shared solution based ok the radio would be … to have a good day and start writing about things that let us have fun be positive think tough and not be sick to stuff you couldn’t battle successfully no one is shaming me (it’s the court was positive toward me) so I need to figure out why I’m hurt and why I’m putting all this effort into figuring out what’s wrong and nothings changed about me. Being conservative serious this is court this is my life’s work these are my memories these are my words and ways I’ve cared therefore even losing him will not prevent me from having things to do to improve and try to help … so this a period of figuring what’s wrong on my own without nurturing support of love no pictures no public video making selfies sexy selfie … show up to court should’ve taken a picture on my way there neat lost after an hour of course broken …  (this is the controversy?)

Based on my card inability to break with a car in front of me far enough away that breaks shouldn’t worked Bc I was able to turn the wheel not hit the car in front of me stopped at the light … is when life gets hard and things don’t work out and things get complicated and otherwise easy trip is made difficult by not knowing by memory which exit so driving lost for an hour and can’t be late to court asked to be seen shows how important it is for me to be there let’s me know that things can come up in life that make it difficult to get places in life or make a good impression … you can be in a rush that doesn’t mean you’ll figure out how to exit any better than previous times and get used to being lost on the freeway which hasn’t happened to me since being taken to Del Amo hospital and using a European GPS and ending up lost and driving past a hospital I have no idea where it exists …

I think schizophrenia is either you lose chance to be normal (hospitalization improving self harm) gave someone permission to declare you to have permanent illness by self harm. I’m gonna work on being alone for a year (suffer alone nothings going right everything’s worse bad day today). Lucky I got to attend court. So if things are getting better (first day of mental health issues gps phone delay) and whatever happens to me is because of what I think my choice my feelings what I decide to focus on (maybe being alone will remind me of everything I can be if I don’t get hurt and stay single friends with everyone make clear – so no one thinks my future will occur by connection (I am either well can make effort talk about blog or nothing nobody not well).

That’s a new privilege … to accept that others are hurting or things can be made better focusing on what’s wrong with me until things get better (and that’s bogs joke to expose me like everything should work or won’t work or makes sense connected) life’s not a game so while love is a fun experience that’s nice to share is why I lost everything. It’s court being ok with me, thinking I’m worse not during making fun of my bad luck hardships losses as joke or characteristic of anything ever before. My life has never been over and put together so many times in a few years and destroyed more than the amount of times to figure out voices jealousy strength stalking identity bullying inner circles help good omen bullying looking bad not selected protected supported (and rejected in public is worst experience in life it means you’re not celebrated it doesn’t excuse any moment something wrong and everyone’s ignoring you not helping you is not a joke or unknown system of building strength … wow that’s how you’re connected to people who you feel sick by on the basis that they’re improved standing support is that thrive done their part considered honored helpful and while you are left to explain solve fox your life I complained once why dropped beyond that I did my best to move on (life has never been an all on board not on board issue with me) I’m not OJ so don’t make fun of my memory what I was told about a victims family (while you’re making fun of loose conversation) ultimately I committed suicide just wanting to talk about life so don’t act it’s easy to have questions or feel sick or “threatened by bullying online attorney in valley” stop accusing my story as made up or act like anything is happening to my story told that’s not how god works or weather or war (if I’m not in jail now) I don’t have a big head making things up or struggling weigh pathetic issues or not strong or feeling insulted by whoever’s issue with me is about what if it’s about where I grew up or being close to the Simpson family (then move to another country and tell GERMANY what’s not chill about Leslie traveling and making friends at a bar).

So as consequence for sounding like being brave mentally ill to address crime and that crime shouldn’t occur on any basis and of because of my Instagram ultimately the code of things being right about life … will keep you strong …. If I could travel everywhere strong enough I’d study more write research papers and be someone else other than a trashed person wannabe soldier making fun of who I am or when or why … I didn’t address a change (insult by definition of soldier) accuse me of being soldier guy like to change my motivations for running change my story (on Vyvanse) … self harm is about called something you’re not. What hurts most is just being alone and accused of liking other people when you love them … ultimately it’s not what we learned it’s about who’s stronger now being separate from me means that I make the right choice … allow me Course wedding dresses at anthropologie (right now my dream is for life to not get worse, and of it can be prevented we are allowed to talk until things get better).

As someone sober it’s not that I’m older you become privileged to feel like you’re in control but not… and your lovers who drink (glad they’re strong) and not stuck talking about mental health bullying a voices mean names sex issues (did I not March I’m blue sweatpants recognizing that Jonah attended my meeting) being a good person is what makes me respected not so someone I love relives a similar trauma (or made reference to) who you love is not your Jonah (and that is disrespectful to a woman writing to someone she loves) … let’s recognize that beautiful things about life are either celebrated or memorialized as being a public offense (no matter what your story looks like or who you are) … in the end either you are someone figuring out life and cares or some lost drug addict accuse you of being some song code nerd who didn’t share what the morning of 9/11 was like (my Father crying) so why was I criticized as traitor Bc you misunderstood Homer Simpson cartoon mention to be about me thinking my Dad does nothing works at a station … why don’t I have money (None of your business in what way Parents fight with Daughters and that was my only experience asking about money (choked) like Bart Simpson) maybe circa sibling in New York living fancy lives upset me why is he given so much confidence power (explained that’s his son to leave him alone).

Those are my memorable moments. If I’m rejected and she’s been in my car in what way am I being told something to make me feel stupid …. To be an adult there will be many people that come into your life and men grow up and experience life while I am lucky (was at least a girlfriend they remembered speak to still). Monogamy is only talking to one.

I made one good comment being applied to my separation what does worse mean (I said worse get well if not sure it’d worse can help figure out why things are worse) I think I can overcome Court being okay with me figuring out what’s wrong I’m sorry if I lost in arguments or managing my health and others feelings at any point … in the end the lesson is “you will wish to be at peace and social & feel good” and learn that war is not a joke (so that’s not always the solution) …. I’m not the bully fake soldier … give me time to have the confidence to put things in stone if unclear … if prevention means don’t attack who and why and if you think my influence gets attacked (it’s voices justification) ultimately I give up on voices … if I’m not bothered by our don’t have to talk about it and forget whatever challenge that created. Judge is okay by me that doesn’t mean elsewhere can be whatever I did my best …. My life couldn’t be better and I couldn’t have lost more hard earned peaceful time … over memes … I’m not missing the issue it’s not respecting my sexuality (femininity strength) so that’s being diagnosed schizophrenia what’s the lesson or taught me was what it looks like a feels like to be bullied and not able to get a job …. You learn when stupid you get tested … it’s how you learn that support isn’t what you need what you need is for who you love to be well … ultimately life’s a cheating mom daughter third face joke …. And maybe for most women cheating isn’t something you worry about it happens when they move on (that’s your first lesson on being less than).

Love is not something mentally ill controlling you or telling you how to feel or what to think. I’ve recognized that with or without adderrall life can be hard a lot of work to figure out you can be hurt too late thoughtful or in hardship since when have I ever acted like writing letters or speaking is easy (maybe why I’m hurt called schizophenic) ultimately Court can decide whether I should suffer am mentally ill or not doing my best (when your life is over) … I did my best it’s too much …  I lost everything (had a challenging day) unwanted phone issue treating me like a racist joke recalling life treating me like things taking too long is a punishment of people known to not be respected having worked been through a lot accuse me of trying to be important for money or for an easier life (so this is making a hard life for me) based on not appreciate my arguments and accusing my health as being about anyone else as far as I’m concerned where you don’t belong don’t go back lesson learned saves you time wondering and not let your issues be about them …. My feelings were hurt when I was made to be paranoid accuse me of being delusional (inner circle supported) hurt me like I worried about him around other women (that’s a good sign) it’s not about you until you drink and think to sue who you went out of your way to friend and she reads Instagram and you’re out here suffering arguing the last 20 years of your life or entire life like it’s a joke of loving myself or learning more about myself – I have already been proud for good grades jobs loved screamed at punished I’m just happy when they’re not mad anymore (what system is lucky or about money) no one who loved me supports blog if it’s complicated for me and no relationship works on the basis of being accused of being something else loving them, those were the best years of my life.

I’m sorry I mentioned @GovAbbott in court (in AA I learned to take responsibility for others) therefore busing immigrants to California isn’t intended to send crime to OC therefore if someone I love is shipped immigrants the commit crimes (then that should be mentioned since I’m the one who is taking it upon myself to figure out a school shooting by analyzing my own life and data and what work I completed and what was stated “failed negotiation” as we’ve mentioned what you’re made to remember about it if you’re trying to help don’t let it happen again (I’m glad the courts have allowed me to care) I’m glad I’m not suicidal or mentally ill— what is risk? How do you know when risk exists? How do you know when a crime occurs and how are you supposed to know what about or what is prompting anyone to react or respond poorly (making fun of my mention of Chicago lightfoot and court appearance accuse me of being confident) I’m not a DA or investigator or detective I’m not a licensed attorney psychotherapist interpreter I’ve not communicated with Chicago (and this is to illustrate a risk that what seems influenced by @mymollydoll1985 accusing me of posting garbage communicates on wrong team accuse of me being being stupid getting hemangioma during George Floyd … you are special when who is from your life is recognized as being apart of a good life no one can tell you what life is about rap street code tough the it factor (being a blogger single living at home recently failing in life) improving I forgot when I saw George anything about my life was being used to make a fact that George Floyd was anything related to me or accuse a name being made with any facts from my story is to either say my story is known not told (teach me people change names and represent what makes them feel like faith is in better things to come) accuse me of not reacting to guys death criticize me as not recognizing myself to be code of it was my argument (photo pill tongue) I saw recall what I saw recorded of him (diagnosis later change making fun of me) like I wasn’t dead serious during riots a blogger and outdoor runner everyday at what point do you stop thinking peoples stories or lives make them important eventually if it’s a game seems easy or made fun of … then start focusing on what’s challenging (that’s avoiding issues) … it’s not a rule to be at peace means to not be scared and it’s not a stated solution to mention to prevent and it’s not been written what’s based on who and in what way did I not sue the cop who assaulted George Floyd for wearing a tie to communicate something Skylar I felt offended by (the entire country is in motion responding) and please don’t act like you know what things are about … how offenders – or talking to police instead of viewing me as helpful accuse me of being cool with or act like that’s normal …. And don’t hurt me based on past 3 years ….

Wait until you have your problems sorted. So that was upcoming (I’m losing with in terms of keeping up with insults or what I’ve sad people unhappy with me) so you can’t take back what you think of life or how you try to process hurt (with no one talking to you) so maybe that equals voices or a think tank or support group minus you real or not real CIA or tech or presidential or people you know you people you don’t know who study you ultimately mental illness breaks you down (and I can’t explain what that would do for someone else in life for me to change or get sick) if I self harm I lost my recovery time without self harm – who can explain loving yourself being visual auditioning to self harm with an ugly face (you know whatever you look like upset and whatever is inside of you however created) ultimately it’s who you’re not making fun of me like I’m haunted harbor something other than me accuse me of having “alters” making fun of my love life and failures you don’t know what love is and value … go ahead call my Instagram schizophenia don’t use my data and photos to create a term “alters” making fun of my inability to get married and get to experience the social pride of adulthood success with family friends … keeping photos now has become a way of making fun of me so things don’t happen you know I don’t think anything will happen for me I’m sorry if you think I’m fake or don’t value me then take everything and all my boyfriends and friends. And be with nothing and stop taking photos … when I give up is not an ER joke and court didn’t tell me I was sick or mentally ill… a worse life is no one’s business (I think court today established that … caring – maybe I won’t be popular and people will think I’m mentally ill or a wannabe law student or attorney politician but at least I care and concerned about preventing. Ask Americana building last time Leslie cared how long did it take for things to improve … that’s a good lesson on support everyone will always be supported whether you recognize that I’m working appreciative well spoken … or lose a 3 year relationship and messenger records (1) NOTICE caring is not a theme and just like I avoid hospital on the basis of self harm resulting in rehab worse diagnosis (if I’m aware of something message and something goes wrong) no one teaches you to message that’s not how you determine what’s wrong so I’m sorry if not famous (was made to say me not doing well results in retaliation against me or celebrated act). Trying to help doesn’t mean you know what others are about the issues or your odds it means I don’t feel well why am I not allowed to comment nothing should happen (celebrated down up or rehab loss) to restate a fear (accusing me of messing up or being attacked) … so if you think I went on a journey deleted emails accusing me of being connected to people of harm to make fun of my safety needs reactions compare me to Hillary is to address again accuse me of being special or disappointing privileged pr take away privilege destruction of property is making fun of figuring out how to share what I’m going through in life in private in email (whether on twitter or not if that’s the allegation then that’s what’s thought) you can’t change what people think …. And if people think that bad things happen accuse you having any kind of history of failed negotiations then please address Justice Ginsberg’s flicking off the camera (whether Imreminded of something helped or confused2be offensive) it wasme that talked about running writing (please don’t misinterpret cancer2be a known condition occurring in professionals who meet me accuseme of having a condition difficult that they lose their battle w/cancer). I never said life was aboutme I only illustrated that I recognize life is about how special her life is … I think insult and (misinformation privilege assumption) is occurring when u think people are closer than they are or hopeful or not positive on some basis your accusing me of

In reality relationships don’t work texting catching up if it’s a lot don’t explain what’s wrong with you you’re goal is to be a chill confident person not insecure and value others, being sick and looking stupid hurts men of value who can relate that they liked you but focused on themselves so they know what it’s like to meet me like me and for me to realize on my own get a job (don’t make fun of women who date or wait to date that’s not funny or voices) I lost every match be yourself accepting of. & just lost Rob, to looking stupid and a group email (overcome bullying voices) it’s not very attractive and embarrassing for someone you like to get bullied go through face changes mental illness.

A secret: happens 

Tell a story: that person gets sick again

What you don’t mention: occurring 

Not winning w/women: hurts difficult 

Being known I’m common: shared wellness apart of getting sick hurts OC

Whatever you are you are I’m sorry for not describing court at this point people get hurt so I’m focusing on what’s causing sickness unhappiness (maybe focus on how I failed and why I’m hurt now and can’t talk to someone I loved). First separation #age38. Work alone.

Called him “my boy” on Facebook not online (I’m a nobody now amongst friends) positive highlight matched (it’s I was the up and coming public figure who’s story he respected saw beauty in me disfigured that’s not revenge dating hyper sexuality or cheating on Todd (so definition of schizophenia makes fun of selfies being cute looking young) I wasn’t adulting him or experienced in (alternative sex options) – Bc I got picked and that was shocking I learned although I may not be cool and respect who he loves … ultimately what makes you cool makes you lucky and if you feel bad or look bad that’s when you were special although women liked by married men are shamed (I’m actually chubby and don’t date so had I known he was married is not what attracts you) it’s who’s interested (how you meet people how older match happens). Please don’t investigate my past year with an ex it’s going fine … no life is perfect … overcome this lawsuit accept what’s not cool about me and be lucky he was into me when I was rejected repeatedly at my house (and brought flowers to his house and didn’t shake his hand stood far away), some kind of misunderstanding I FELT COOL WITH HIM BEING SOCIAL he was being social Bc I was young he’s conservative.

There’s no reason for sickness or bipolar or mental health 2009 v 2011 v 2013 — I guess the key theme is failure and not feeling well, argument, fighting, complaining, asserting yourself, being bullied, losing friends, looking stupid, getting jealous focusing on law school and then not finishing losing everything again (there’s no pattern to wellness) I’m sorry if anyone’s confused by my health and disclosures or thinks I make things seem easy or not respectful protective which is probably why I shown nude online called schizophenic it’s making fun of what I recall why I can’t go to IOP aa or rehab on the basis of privacy (if you don’t think I don’t respect see their struggle) then you’re sorely mistaken as seeing me as pretending to be anywhere in life or think sexuality is a lie you carry defective should know of, if you’ve always liked men (it’s Bc of the rehab chatter I walked away from brought up sex offenders in prison get it the worse) and walked away (sued) so that’s what gets capitalized on how you describe life and you’re not memorialized and they are to treat you like you didn’t go out of your way to make them feel special take risk too and didn’t embarrass them or speak poorly of them or let them be vulnerable or watched or look bad.

I’m allowed to talk about challenging subjects with risk to me and my health that the court is not punishing me for (which hurts to hear I’m not mentally ill) and means to be careful I don’t get sick or sick people don’t mix things up or accuse my writing of being sick or teaching anyone anything sick accuse myself of being possessed or accuse my writing as transformative (as far as I’m concerned I went to school to write and admired writing courses teach novel writing) it’s whatever skill I haven’t learn or accused of not demonstrating becomes something I’m made fun of for (how things look on the outside seeming stupid is Bc of something you have said that sounds stupid that makes you look like you dont recognize that you sound stupid or disqualifying your viewpoint on the basis of saying your statement is not true … at age 38 maybe that’s not how you are hurt but later think about whether that matters (question who helps you) it’s you that make yourself look stupid not who helps you that hurts you and sometimes that can cause you paranoia (why would I get sick applying to law school). Seems like personal statement and explaining cocaine was on deans list rehab was too difficult (because I recovered) ultimately bringing up a Sydney comment “what adversity” living in West Hollywood (is a good sign to think about a challenge you overcame even if it was a setback or failure).

There’s no such thing as being bitched once you work rush to family dinner and hit your head on the lamp several times that’s you’re only story of working hard and clumsy overheard my conversations (today ended positively even though my phone is giving me a hard time my gps didn’t work so I was lost for an hour panicking driving 100 miles an hour driving the same route over and over again Bc I missed an exit breaking up the radio stiffness disclosing something tough I’m faced with in the event anyone in my family gets sick (figure out why). I called 911 told them I’m lost my phone doesn’t work (Bc I shared one comment relevant to molestation as a Neverland guest) and crashed my car stressed out and lost, have to appear I’m court it was important I be there not mess up it’s rare to be allowed to talk and get to talk to a DA and Judge, so that’s privilege it doesn’t mean court is for fun so when the Judge says you cannot talk to him and I reply okay, that means because I spoke tried participate I responded even with an attorney … so that’s losing everything. (To highlight I’m sorry I shared my brothers adderrall story childhood) firefighters … and he got sick as an adult Bc I shared that …. crashing my car and my tire flat happened (Bc my breaks didn’t work), so I called the police they didn’t show up, couldn’t tow my car, a Good Samaritan helped me and thankfully my car was messed up but the car in front of me was okay. The story at Neverland I didn’t share was getting in a car accident listening to music in a Lincoln mini golf cart. So today was an example of mentally I’ll under stress doing my best to figure out why I have schizophrenia and not taking selfie before driving and gos not working ending up lost by stadium and then after being lost 1 hr crashed my car, which result matches a story not shared … so how does a bad day happen and nothing goes right for you? (1) I don’t know there’s no formula for it so based on court today although they were positive maybe it’s Bc my life is hard and I lost my pen pal, and never got to work for him and instead made to feel left out … in the end it’s my job to get well (the more you harp on my reactions to women) the more uncomfortable things are and the less anything is about you …. Due to “not to talk to” I’m aware that Bc I loved Todd and lost everything & 3 years worth of effort learning and getting to know another and myself … I can accept my loss and lesson is not to date again and be close to anyone …. and write to the courts until I don’t have any more challenges (the in between phase in life or isolation bullying worse than reality) isn’t necessary to appreciate being around people … so don’t let yourself get destroyed by voices …

Suicide isn’t genetic. Ask Star Magazine. And Chicago, my 2013 book isn’t a joke. And the character “Anne Frank” or movie Little Princess not relevant to the times, therefore if Chicago is shocked by a homicide on a popular doctor in the community who bought a house. What was remembered is that “he didn’t feel safe.” Based on my disclosure outside the ER referencing a new album its possible to argue @mymollydoll1985 inspired him to buy a home on top of a hill based on criticizing me as though I (1) recognized he was the maker of solution following (2) with a job with govt recognized I would be making the reverse (I’ve been alone 2004-2017) so it’s not me scared or not having been toughened up by experiences in life (I’m not famous so it’s considered joke) what’s most important is to recognize who is famous and if read into which doctor in Chicago also found solution in recognizing that although Michael Moore (may be atop a hill in a house – Edward Scissorhands) that’s a compliment recording my life tracking my progress and learning how to record life make photos (means either I’m a famous patient a doctor would be aware of … therefore as a patient in what way would a doctor be in support of how things are now and in what way as a patient am isolated in life made to complain). I’ve briefly addressed looking bad fixed reality and my life on my own losing everything and relationships and nothing can be done if you can’t be helped so that’s “giving up on you” “can’t help you” and that’s a lesson on improving and being told to go to the hospital … in the end “court I learned its up to me to improve” and re: bullying you can be hurt look stupid lose everything at any point in life (it was my recommendation to lighten up (if you’ve lived enough to get hurt) why would I complain if I recover have a dream boyfriend lose everything and my job (if you suggest lighten up and argue “a hard life or making life seem hard can affect kids” in what way would I hypotheses that … that if my brain can’t comprehend getting sick, insult, making fun of my childhood deductions or books, and I’m 38 means I’m doing a good job taking breaks and talking about subjects until things are shared (nothing secret) and is how I get hurt acting like making fun of me is my job or what you do with a life (that’s comparing me sharing about a yearlong ordeal with godaddy and LAPD and didn’t make a big deal about anything online and managed bullying and death threats took many years to talk normal with someone who hurts you (I’m realizing that reading from my life if I’m hurt that’s to treat me like I didn’t admire work hard professional toward).

Email 📧 (1) archive

Important texts 

I may be people convinced not to respect me is the trend … so the issue is not who is loved it’s what’s the game in disrespect … at what point is anyone convinced anywhere else solution. Go by … it’s rare moments bonded with my Dad hugging me everyday telling me how much he loves me excited to see me …. And after telling pen pal my Dad is dying please respect me …. Froze me like a how I work destroy joke —- it’s the same issue we’ll recovered (upset mental illness away from others) not recognizing my hurt crying for a year doesn’t make me a fat douchbag at my dads funeral or a mass shootings joke …. And death of a counsins doesn’t mean I’m hated and that’s the painful truth to life or code I’m convinced doesn’t exist (so no it’s not okay hate me interpret bullied losing not okay convince messaging Todd wrong …. Not okay accuse me Invega stupid too late … if code is by photos shared who is rooted for then those are the ideals hero’s …. So making me less than …. Doesn’t mean I didn’t respect them a move on sick joke …. Or cancer joke …. Being hurt not moving on … isn’t limited to 50 year olds if I was in my 20s …. And I’m not a chaste immune robot joke can say anything or gets away anything …. I’ve never achieved anything in life online I can’t studying or working and since the focus is on losses … then me bringing up issue (known lies to a known disappointment known not loved or term joke) and further a tinder joke (banned after 2 matches) … what’s unforgivable identity theft ….

Like it’s didn’t care overcame it 

Code I didn’t go through 

And forgive anger 

Continue blame me 

Didn’t reconnect aaron 

Because supported Taylor 

And it’s not known how got sick 

Arrested his major came over 

Delete hook up messages 

Slammed my head into wall 

Almost broken thermometer 

Critical to mention (it’s me being hurt and my publicizing why is he tiring me coming on to me blame jail share photo ax permission take on issues you think I’ve not thought about … or mentioned made right choice not to hook up head injury unknown causes (how u spoke about him punished me)… so continued issue (mental illness) not caused by another I’m responsible for … joke is matched then texted is seen (unmatched) so (thinking things wrong told care about my family isn’t upset me when I’m well dressed nice my dad just died and I represent and protect my family is premonition (not recognize survived part problem view struggle taken out) if they don’t feel good not sure and if I don’t feel good I can’t make a person happy proud or be hopeful and accept hurt (touch used up rape joke to accuse me misrepresenting men not grateful for them) making me sick (accuse me surviving liked) is the not young old alcohol joke — everything I learn spiritually (is treating me coherent or not loving supported incoherent or judgmental therefore —- coherence — psychology is issue “clarity” Invega stupid made room with young woman who I’m ugly compared to share my experiences treat…  me as awkward close to another human being based storage space being a dork weirdo … incents I’m Valley (because I felt bothering bothered) focused on issue (what’s hurtful and why) because of a shooting on a freeway (white car and street Chapman) keep accusing me story known blame me and then accuse me being sick (stories aren’t code … not respected by story based on accusing me suing incents and blame me shooting —- means what happened going to treatment (no one supported my complaints or looking bad) instead I’m being treated like I should know what being sick means and why pathetic to others bullied (why that’s a win) it’s not who or when I special at what point —- did you not recognize investment worth the importance that would be given to everyone equally not realized …. and continue treat me name joke (not the answer) and accuse me looking like a douchbag or make fun of my face or any ex doing well without me means they don’t need me I value them it’s my loss … bumble was biggest mistake of my life ….

Its if I wasn’t recognized as hurt lied about fun make everyone go by hate site fun act like it’s ok I’m delusional as injured (improving my photos as show moving on for bad photos) it’s not me working with others anger or what’s responded to the joke or finally removing site (it’s in what way is normalizing respected to disrespected to be not a big deal either expect me unsupportive of consequences) because caused punch my head over refraining from taking on 50 cents case and not without accounting myself I was injured to destroyed critical tweet (attitude, social, date, job, effort …. Will never happen again …. Because that’s when I’m hurt …. With preference seeing me noticeably disabled scared weak in pain something wrong)

Respect now 

Isn’t a joke entourage 

Loses it doesn’t mean in charge 

President and Giuliani punished isn’t deserved. 

Hurting me hospitalized not deserved. 

Using Maui to highlight their forced mug shots isn’t okay.

Can’t take a joke ____ 

Name each person. 

Accuse code (catch on joke) 

Disrespecting cures (focused on in what way Eminem song or me listening represent anything about me I should know of or unreal description of being passionate about life deserving to be where you are) so no one’s outside of me supported (never noticed get now viewed famous reinforce YouTube two girls one cup …) to say it started and accuse me recognizing insult, when I threw up.

Pervert you thought school shooting … kept pushing for 

Expect me perform ignore 

Not going his many times 

Was strong didn’t self harm 

Now mass shooting 

So called pervert 

Bc they thought pervert 

They want to know why 

Phone died 

Locked out garage spoke wheel 

So issue is (what’s stupid guilty off beat inappropriate)

(1) tried can’t be social. 

(2) beautiful home nice people. 

(3) humiliated punched my head. 

(4) making code jokes 

(5) return struggle mentioned 

(6) that was this year 2023 and 1 job and many acceptances 

(7) success blog earn money 

(8) code protection 

(9) exposing respects disrespect not respect what or who knows what’s made accuse my reservations or mentions (friendly challenge) injure me as hurtful one WordPress mention (clearly punished) so messages many months later already responded not friendly to me.

My life isn’t happening 

In spite of positive reviews 

Bc cant get over what sickness sounds like or how caused 

Think calling me “robot” is a joke hurting me as human (accusing me calling itself human like be gentle then accusing me of being a fucking animal teams joke gay secret) …. I can accept never talking to friends again (if living life ruined) continue to write .. until everyone had s chance ruining my life  embarssing making look stupid reject me (so it’s not code that binds others … hating me intended to bind others … accuse me old … accuse me being cool with young women no … I don’t have energy …. And not a who I was not proud joke (it’s what k went through blamed for hurt basis of my thesis what’s destroyed isn’t what caused a mass shooting me being hurt another reacting on behalf of what’s been hurt (thesis) or in a library (don’t accuse secreting information that differs reality or anyone presented like I’m hurt people can tell / make it a can’t take a joke cover up (first Barack.then Rob, then friends, then two stories rape joke. Funeral joke, I’m the end if you don’t recognize me representing my family shared everything …. Then I’m not a burbs joke …. It’s obsession with my face and viewing improvement as sex and not respecting obsesity respect my discomfort as theirs if it’s not something I want and who’s happiness  not in suppprt of it’s not supporting me seeing md naked and watching me watch porn like that gives right call me pervert (what keeps me going therefore is not looking like s shot pervert is not the new joke can’t take a joke)

They didn’t care I was suicidal driving to lax eberyday working on myself talk to courts without bothering anyone they don’t care about what the issue isn’t all they care about is a face they dislike make fun of what I sound like suicidal think I’m a messy joke — interpret emails unforgiving adolescent struggles not picky over it —- bring up like I’m a sell out and everyone cool except me says shit then doesn’t deserve to be around people ….

Expect me talk about hospital 

If health concern 

Cause me suicide punch head 

Topic addressed with fear “P” 

Trying to make okay — excuse mass shootings because they think they’re god if a kid shoots teacher in the hand (think calling me P is pushing acceptance I don’t recognize as occurring by chance) …

Because I said precedent 

Rape joke 

Man ugly grose naked bad exp 

Joke to insult me my love 

To make fun of a card shared 

Think that’s funny now 

It’s hurtful it’s shocking 

didn’t respect lids I had and lost 

Bc not mentioned hurt 

Why discussed online after 

Hospital 

As a social joke 

Improved ruined my life

I’m not asking for it

Treated by psychiatrist who is in charge of whole hospital 

Treated as special w/an intern female (did disclose schizophenia and controversy day meds) Bc fight mention word “P” accuse me being undisclosed sex offender like making a joke of running redcording know where I am is permission to make it funny to treat me as one my discomfort Fears aren’t permission to create

So being in rehab people hopeful social and me smoking alone was funny to watch — proper (dedicated smoker and popular in the hospital even though in my room whole time) accuse me of places to belong make friends – insult a positive experience I didn’t diss the hospital or the patients) )

Now it’s life is good exposed to 

Ruin my life 

Accuse me award show fake 

Or to be in a room of lives 

Treat me doesn’t belong 

So any acceptance 

Viewed fake 

Placement joke 

Social and suicide joke 

Me being robbed 

Informative M pill joke 

What I recognize 

So it’s anything important here 

Need to write a long paper on public 

Tone is not perform here or eloquent there (seem to forget disability accuse me “robot” is an insult to justify pushing me aging me letting me die like I have chances I’m going to overcome through hard  work nothings guarantee. 

And no set back is code 

Lesson is too many setbacks 

Never be successful be a joke 

Lesson is mention sickness 

Combo is making fun family

Figuring out stupid hurtful 

Exposing me 

Accusing me 

Scare me others point out 

Not what I’ve done wrong 

No one’s truth is more real 

Makes mine any less real 

All help confidential 

So it’s my life for story 

They interpret job hire ability 

Joke making fun hiring process 

Making race the issue 

Treating me as suffer by connected lose points Bc of 

Analogy treat me doesn’t belong 

Stay away permanent 

Running isn’t mass shooting racist sense of humor incident 

And ruining our rapport based discrimination jobs all requiring Spanish or mirror installer punching my head in my room years … doesn’t make me a gay housekeeper joke accuse anyone disorganized me

Email 📧 (2) archive

Removed 

Lost my battle with voices after being on a psychiatric hold which resulted in self harm and no writing or effort to prevent voices prevented or my documented improvement and stages or description of mental health didnt prevent voices as a result of my condition worsening deleting photos on google (not respected as proper or helpful) and deleted all my iphone notes and discontinue going through any stages of shouting on twitter or now in real life by voices and continue to delete until voices stop and then start over, why all my websites were taken down, until voices stop, which cant be prevented through writing, so taking geodone and sleep everyday (out of wellbutrin and prozac) and new DEDUCTION is two words are the cause of everything bad occuring, and hurting me results in a greater risk to the public when Im hurt or sick is an increased likelihood and not work or wellness, which was falsely determined and falsely blamed.

—-

Hospitalized twice accuse me of a fire in Marina del Rey I didn’t know about. 

Ignore the two weeks after the hospital writing everyday to prevent voices.

No one cares shouted at 7 times I didn’t make a big deal not hurt restate. 

People don’t comprehend how my head is hurt insulted treated a P. 

I don’t deserve that I love Todd I’m marrying him and loving him until the day I die and you can believe anything you want what’s created wrong. 

Accuse porn calling me gay treat me not admitting to something making me sick. 

And don’t call me P can’t be prevented by love of any kind destroyed my love with Todd prevented love future. 

Accuse my strength as against others. 

Then covid fires mass shootings. 

So went against me. 

Caused more mass shootings fires. 

So the solution is no one against anyone by any lawsuit entitle anyone to cause voices inflict pain suffering.

—-

What’s unclear no one’s filed lawsuit prosecuted me for?

Disappointed 38 yrs of life accuse me of speaking in a way causes suicide. 

Not treat me says things or people die accuse anyone giving up think is my fault. 

Accuse me of a truth I don’t see to say death is because someone doesn’t see when things are good accuse me of being strong ruining peace or pleasantness. 

Two words unclear what causes shooting homicide P word or hats or why I’m being accused of anyone else mental health issues accuse my identity as for trash waste or blame. 

Responding turned into hurting me bullying me no one knows why over spring mass shootings occurred again. 

Unclear whether hurting me or disability prevents a likelihood or decreases a likelihood. 

You think speaking well is a choice mistreat expose me by aggravation to state why or what for accuse me of being wrong or should know why anyone has died accuse me as the human being alive accuse me of causing death ignore my suffering.

So what’s not true is every positive interaction. 

What’s lost is my entire life is ruined. 

What can’t be stopped word P. 

What’s untrue is a word or sexuality change is causing me sickness fail to recognize obesity and my face ugly and weird videos as a symptom of not normal. What’s wrong. 

It’s unclear why calling me schizophenic is expected to prevent mass ahootings and fires and unclear on whether me being hurt creates a greater likelihood or why?

—-

And now I have to improve 

Prevent mass shootings 

Because it’s clear “schizophenia” word causes mass shootings many. 

And the word “P” causes me to punch my head and suicide. 

So what’s suicide (body dies the heart dies the head hurts the body is in pain (words hurt) and then a person dies commits suicide because don’t feel well).

—-

So a mutual goal is fire prevention and hurtful words (voices accuse delusion pain and suffering) accuse me letting random things happen pretend to be normal no we can talk about it if it’s not clear what mass shooting prevention is or what improvement wellness is for means (sickness hearing voices self harm suicide occurs after a mass shooting) and fire occurs because I’m suicidal called 911 forced to go to the ER.

——

So the solution for voices is to continue calling P cause more incidents of bullying (accuse me shouting as guilt create risk for harm to me or who want something bad to occur if I shout) why not just put me in jail if you keep calling me that? Why need a result? Since voices don’t comprehend why head hurts body hurts (don’t comprehend self harm or suicide) then discontinue reacting or cursing (I know now pretty well spoken able = voices and disability is desired result dysfunction) and this is supposed to prevent mass shootings and fires accuse me non acceptance and watch my head shrink body disfigured not self harming and that’s to reinforce a belief that I’m the cause of mass shootings so if that’s what you think stop changing me or bullying me simply file a lawsuit why I’m hacked bullied called that and explain that to a judge so I’m not being strategic law school doesn’t matter simply put into words solves voices let’s hope they don’t continue to call me that.

—-

Calling me “P” nude online you think caused a school shooting. 

Accuse my pictures offensive to eyes. 

Think my body or face causes a young man to shoot a school.

Accuse Texas police of negotiation your making fun of me accusing me of being ugly unimportant not special accuse me of being anyone a kid masturbated to accuse me of causing a school shooting. 

You accuse me being a loser (because a mass shooter was a failure). 

Then after many attempts to discuss how P hurts no diagnosis or medication can solve or cure how people are able to connect to my body hear them sober on meds thin or obese is not my fault. 

Making me obese to say my photos caused a school shooting.

Accuse my reaction as cursing wrong. 

And so hospitalized twice. 

Getting voices after I got well. 

Make me sick punch my head. 

To accuse me of causing a mass shooting. 

Think voices is instead of jail makes no sense file a lawsuit. 

Then your destroying my relationship to Todd over a man I wasn’t that close to or in love with or in need of any support. 

Don’t believe voices cause suicide. 

Wrongfully accuse me drugs. 

Because psychiatrist charged me $700 can’t get over not on meds punching my head figure out why Kobe died and blaming me or the psychiatrist. 

Refusal discuss be hurt accuse me shouting to myself sick means I refuse to punch my head drink or commit suicide.

Email 📧 (3) archive

Voices hurt 

Can’t be prevented 

Nothing provided prevents 

Start over nothing worked 

Two words unclear the cause 

Two words 

Not sure cause 

Mass shootings 

Death and fire

Nothing matters 

What’s of issue now 

Voices how does solve 

Death suicide 

Mass shootings 

Delete everything wasn’t enough 

Start over like everyone 

Problem words 

Limit risk 

Not accepted past starements 

Delete everything 

Solve two words 

Email 📧 (4) archive

Two words two problems 

What’s the solution and why. 

Public information dilemma. Of concern. 

Hospitalized twice accuse me of a fire in Marina del Rey I didn’t know about. 

Ignore the two weeks after the hospital writing everyday to prevent voices.

No one cares shouted at 7 times I didn’t make a big deal not hurt restate. 

People don’t comprehend how my head is hurt insulted treated a P. 

I don’t deserve that I love Todd I’m marrying him and loving him until the day I die and you can believe anything you want what’s created wrong. 

Accuse porn calling me gay treat me not admitting to something making me sick. 

And don’t call me P can’t be prevented by love of any kind destroyed my love with Todd prevented love future. 

Accuse my strength as against others. 

Then covid fires mass shootings. 

So went against me. 

Caused more mass shootings fires. 

So the solution is no one against anyone by any lawsuit entitle anyone to cause voices inflict pain suffering. 

Cursing is to say my attitude caused death like people left. 

So me cursing if anyone dies in the news will accuse my attitude causing death.

What’s unclear no one’s filed lawsuit prosecuted me for?

Disappointed 38 yrs of life accuse me of speaking in a way causes suicide. 

Not treat me says things or people die accuse anyone giving up think is my fault. 

Accuse me of a truth I don’t see to say death is because someone doesn’t see when things are good accuse me of being strong ruining peace or pleasantness. 

Two words unclear what causes shooting homicide P word or hats or why I’m being accused of anyone else mental health issues accuse my identity as for trash waste or blame. 

Responding turned into hurting me bullying me no one knows why over spring mass shootings occurred again. 

Unclear whether hurting me or disability prevents a likelihood or decreases a likelihood. 

You think speaking well is a choice mistreat expose me by aggravation to state why or what for accuse me of being wrong or should know why anyone has died accuse me as the human being alive accuse me of causing death ignore my suffering.

So what’s not true is every positive interaction. 

What’s lost is my entire life is ruined. 

What can’t be stopped word P. 

What’s untrue is a word or sexuality change is causing me sickness fail to recognize obesity and my face ugly and weird videos as a symptom of not normal. What’s wrong. 

It’s unclear why calling me schizophenic is expected to prevent mass ahootings and fires and unclear on whether me being hurt creates a greater likelihood or why?

Sirius radio Soul Cycle @eminem

I’m very respectful worked everyday ran everyday during covid riots and marches!

I pitched to @WhiteHouse no one cares about Barack or @POTUS or the last 10 years.

And now I have to improve 

Prevent mass shootings 

Because it’s clear “schizophenia” word causes mass shootings many. 

And the word “P” causes me to punch my head and suicide. 

So what’s suicide (body dies the heart dies the head hurts the body is in pain (words hurt) and then a person dies commits suicide because don’t feel well).

Called me schizophrenic 

And a there were many mass shootings.

Email 📧 (5) archive

So “honesty telling truth” positive response paramedics description of losses what happened in the hospital was good to inform them of …. Emails got worse ….. so lesson is if hate website is made shay happens to you is what’s funny and what people think of you you can’t change why not taken seriously and viewed as stupid and what hurts is reinforcement of a website you call “hate” and think recovery taking 3 years is made up (so continued discussion disability is teaching me when hurt to accept what’s my fault if bullied not worth complaining battling mental illness doesn’t mean being faught or argue with others and to accept the humor in me mentally ill punishing me for what’s wrong with me whether I admit to it or acknowledge it and be hurt equally by what I say wrong can’t fix when I sound mentally I’ll my life’s made worse and voices can’t be prevented. Accept I did my best and suffering now because I hit my head and don’t know why I’m sick trying my hardest and not sickness is viewed as what I’ve done or said wrong (so stated “too much for me beyond normal conversation” hurts me (move forward if I look bad now I look bad having emailed who they didn’t recognize I improved and thought I blamed so I’m sick now for getting mental illness by voices) being punished for drinking at home instead of going out and taking meds before 5pm and calling that suicidal so I was punished for using a word (responding poorly in words to a term hurtful) so I don’t have a solution for being called that I have to accept I’m hurt (not what people wanted just wanted me to accept terms hurtful and resulting physical mental illness not being epithets fault something I described not believed) ….

Email 📧 (6) archive

No ones minimizing any loss or news. I’m not minimizing fires I did my best to help messaged @USNavy have called 911 and joined @fema took trainings (reported what I learned “rumors in crisis are considered a threat) and eventually published a book I was already writing before any fire (so please don’t misunderstand my life as causing any attack — later use “shouted at 7 times” mischaracterize me as unpleasant around other or toward o think it’s clear that makes me look bad so give me credit for sharing about it in public these are incidents I can’t defend myself in when reporting what they’ve said makes me look at fault … whether there’s an underlying of issue of fault is based on where I live accuse fires as occurring to threaten or scare me and to communicate to others of a dislike toward me or viewed as because of me my life where I live or what is said …. Therefore “offensive” “schizophenic” is to accuse me leading a life asking for attention or offends others to blame me for fires accuse my beliefs or 38 years of life as what’s not good enough view me as failure (2018, 2019, or 2023 #Maui) or misinterpret Fire as “bomb” accuse me of being someone who in leadership has failed and caused our Country to be “bombed” …. Lawsuit means (don’t open up to anyone don’t do therapy and that’s not harassment or mental illness exposing anyone to any condition differs from normal maturity sense of peace and success) so I’m sorry I was sued “instead of viewing me as loving accused of “harassment” unwanted messages or emails which makes clear (don’t share my writing or books with anyone if to publish for sale not private review based on that not being necessary or accuse me as someone who throngs go bad by or accuse me of someone I’m a mess with me accuse my life of being a mess).

Email 📧 (7) archive

I’m being discriminated because of mental health. I’m being discriminated for being pulled over sober “jail.” I’m being discriminated because of breakups or songs you think is clearly about me that aren’t. I’m being discriminated as sued (servers aggressive stop my life). I’m being discriminated because I have and still have difficulty with why I was called schizophenic and what changes and mistreatments I’ve suffered since then more bullying and fire and gun violence conspiracy and now suicide and death. I shared my difficulties and instead of appreciating my honesty treat me as saying things that endanger me or others when if I’m attacked to protect others would be to say what is causing pain a difficulty that would be hurtful to who I know also. I’m being discriminated if I say a weird word capitalized on, so my writing is treated as “inappropriate” or not a true reflection of what bullying does to my brain body and face and what is “conforming” is a joke as to “gender” or “sexuality.” Purpose is to make me uncomfortable and others. I’m being discriminated as a model openly loving (accused of being watched or modeling for love which I’ve sent no pictures to anyone random or in any messenger discussion), and for complaining about 3 women (who knew me ignored me blocked me rejected me) and why should that not be hurtful or deserved then accuse me of being mean or inappropriate to not respect a @fema rule and the constant accuse me reading into analyzing others when I don’t (get mad if I question or complain) and for people meeting me then I’m common ignore reject me as though I don’t know what’s wrong or accuse me of not being deserving or accuse me undisclosed illness which was stated and criticize me in dysfunction or difficulty speaking.

Email 📧 (8) archive

Dropped care (is a fire issue). Mental illness (to speak sick). Voices (no solution to prevent). Complaint (designate me as wrong). Problems (treat me as can’t solve). Misdiagnose mental health (& brain). Can’t problem solve (with me sick). Accuse me of being sick (can’t solve). Make fun of me sick (can’t prevent). Attitude (read my notes injure me). Can’t figure out mass shooters. Hurting me (accuse mass shooters as though they care about me or know me).

Email 📧 (9) archive

To do 

Delete blog post 

Archive mymollydoll.com

Became a problem not a problem 

Search remove anything stupid sounding 

Occurred at end 

Delete anything confronting 

Discontinue (how conclude) 

Reflects on my attitude and pain 

And street (next post) 

Hurt instead of what 

Treated like a guy hurt on the inside 

Is not how I become a woman 

Doesn’t mean friendly fire 

Email 📧 (10) archive

So lesson is hurt to both sides. To scare me make me sick. To state what’s making me sick. Doesn’t solve my hurt no matter topic. So risk taken was put in words an issue. Causes sickness to me and others. Makes things worse. Force a statement untrue. That can’t be overcome causes sickness. And prevention is misunderstood. By designating illness or wellness. So neither side is happy satisfied. And innocence isn’t determined. Bullying is not solved. Hearing one “word” faint caused permanent diagnosis made worse.

Email 📧 (11) archive

Scared (viewed as mean or wrong). Why a person hurt (defend others). So a person (hurt + wrong) Is hurting a person (me) to be innocent. The not sure mad or guilt (waiting for). Accuse me (waited for or fester response). Accuse another being hurt (like not hurt). Misidentify (my statement can’t be not be hurt hurting another is inhuman). So I’m hurt (otters not affected or waiting) accuse me being hurt (esoteric or causes others to be scared of me). Misunderstanding (hurt as sensed). Accuse me of sensed (having a hurt). Accuse (my hurt) difficult to others. Hear mental health challenge. Then think statement is (blunt). Think (blunt is easy and offensive). Accuse me saying (not difficult). Read (my difficulty) think is easy. #scotus (how I’m hurt) Misunderstood @mymollydoll1985 As working hard (me not well) Practice hurting me (misinterpret) How everyone well (by hurting me) Which causing waiter on scared affected. #FMRadioLosAngeles And the (allowed let made fun of) Made people feel bad (make fun of) So make it okay (not okay why?) Once me hurt (matters difficult others). What makes my hurt difficult others. Why they’re affected if I’m hurt. Why who’s innocent scared … Is people losing toughness to fear.

Email 📧 (12) + archive

What stories related to me is justifying bullying or lawsuit and how my family is being affected. 

I’m sorry that not staying well or difficulty in life disabled has resulting in making me or anyone look small and I’m sorry for my failure to impress’s be hired or be trusted or be respected and have instead been forced to live life as a joke or be treated as being at fault or to read my work and make everything affect me and punish me for any complaint there’s no solution to my mental health psychosis or any insult so I’ll sorry for self harm hospital or suicide not solving anything or being able to get a job … it’s clear my life is made worse based on everyone helped supported except me treating me as a ignore joke unsupported joke addict alcoholic breakup suicide joke or trust poor homeless or bad associations joke I’m sorry to everyone disappointed by my reputation inability to improve recover stay well and constantly being treated as less than try to make me jealous compare me or not trust what my value is making fun of who I am successful among … misread my comprehension. Then be used accused of not being helpful a prove I’m wrong joke and see improvement as a prove who wrong joke as though voices or 6 people shouted at me won’t feel good if I earn a living respected so I’m made to sound mean shout have gay issues over non acceptance clean face wellness professionalism looking young do it’s a story issue me not accusing hospital or ER is the joke don’t understand why sick think it’s a choice pr things wrong a told not to do do this doing what’s wrong joke or feels good and is wrong joke misjudging my personality. 

I’m sorry I don’t have a solution for voices ongoing since 2017 and have done my best to value my life time with others unfortunately I can’t write enough in time to prevent and cannot address or cure (delusion “voices”) be accused of knowing not knowing or forgetting or making funny my life accuse me giving up (not fighting) as though I can afford to be used as “schizophenia” and a “change” offender joke to ridicule Benjy speaking at the funeral …. No treatment medications or being off adderrall and solve any amount of disdain for me or the basis is clearly my presence and being fat thick and not beautiful punished (punish me as suicidal hurt myself doesn’t feel good voices trying to sleep isn’t my fault or anything I’ve said or how treated anyone or a previous interaction anytime I think about accused of should know why I get voices so no one cares January 2017 voices weren’t real or rest of my life based on causing a condition with no cure and wasting my life a suicide joke like I give up not compliant blame adderrall). What can be solved is what’s not the code and what I’ve not spoken to or done wrong or bad rumor about anyone I care about or make anything family not hurtful ….

Don’t cause me voices …. You know who I am how I feel. My disability nothing else matters. Not what I think well or sick. Voices don’t stop until I punch my head. Therefore take it to court don’t call me things I’m not don’t accuse me of changing threatened or think voices are delusion I did my best if it’s too dangerous and I’m suffering I can’t provide a solution for death and dying if I’m not loving strong so what’s fraud about me getting sick …. Please accept I’ve tried discuss voices I did my best I cannot help who’s hurting me (please stop misunderstanding me for a close not close know or love well or ugly change joke I was hospitalized bullied when I got home punched my head so I didn’t make it in time to work again and by the time I started blogging that being my goal and handling rejection …. What’s the purpose for losing it or flip out anger or change to ugly joke role model discomfort love issue joke …. Please accept my disability provide what went wrong in my life based on who’s connected to me or how I’ve been harmed and don’t make fun of me making a big deal or make fun of my reactions (there’s no untrue made reality joke about 6 times shouted at or life is difficult treat me beyond recognized tone (voices P word is more important than my past 10 years 38 years of life or timeline then I have to accept that’s real and did my best (you can only help who you can help and if you think I’m a woman liked who says it wrong blame me mass shootings than that’s what makes you feel good to make fun of what’s too much to me). #scotus

So the lesson is “what’s too late” is being hurt self harm and that’s my fault and my reaction to losing my battle with voices after being hospitalized and my life is worse because I hurt myself and what can’t be solved is what causes voices or why I was hurt can’t be taken back. Therefore “Not Code” is a valid assessment of if voices not believed shouted at sick hospital can’t help messaging can’t prevent the lesson is what I’m like sick or mentally ill and what’s not not true who I am when I’m well and what’s not real “voices” and how is “responsibility” admission to fault (voices causing me suicide after after explaining hurtful what it causes me when feels like now means what happened to me means my effort to prevent bullying failed) therefore I’ve not given up explain as best I can what’s not working for voices what truth, what’s no longer true nice photos, who I’m not well or improved, and what’s prevention acceptance that if I’m hurt or disabled and not trusted and you think I’m a “P” means not only did mass shootings occur still with opportunity to prevent instead it chosen to punish me for my inability to speak or lack of intelligence after hospital work shared because not believed is who I am, sought punishing me for being mean as ignored made scared and what is true? Responsibility is I did my best, share the truth explain how I’ve failed or lost or been hurt what’s my fault and that’s the best I can do is explain why I’m given a hard time why that’s my fault and also be accused as coming from a story better represented by who hurts me still making of issue when I’m hurt lesson don’t complain don’t apply stay away from everyone can’t conform disprove or please anyone to any standards in life do my best and did my best to share how I should be and instead of improved recognized as careful starting over without knowing if I will recover or if damage is permanent based on no one caring why or how voices are caused no one cares I tried to discuss a topic and edit sick suicidal so because my words weren’t accepted or my limit what happened to me was where I was at so who’s proven wrong or right no one only “voices” no scientific explanation or study written by anyone with schizophrenia or in psychology or psychiatry who acknowledges the existence of voices or how created or justified therefore there is no cure based on me improving and my condition improving and using my words to cause me to self harm and that’s not punishment instead of mass shootings so this is why everything specific discussed because clearly it’s not my condition or health that voices believe or have faith in …. What’s in jeopardy is why? What’s not inevitable is no crime, so what’s confusing is how hurting me prevents or hospital or jail or voices and what’s prevention or what’s my fault so discussion from me is better than a prove wrong change hurt suicide reaction fault joke.

Based on mass shootings and because called “P” it’s safe to argue make a fact that whoever doesn’t like me doesn’t like I can prevent and thinks I’m hurt or hurtful or thinks I don’t take “responsibility” accuse me of inability to help or lost to an issue could not be prevented after hospital no statement of what hurts prevented for me based on “P” solution is not me going to hospital again (or accuse me hurtful insensitive blame everything on me isn’t an alternative route unstated risk to a date known trauma or strategy political) therefore hurting me (means you don’t think I can prevent mass shootings and can’t comprehend why or why not my fault then or self harm or bumble accuse me of cheating a signal to act or commit crime make fun of rehab as a signal to a track accuse me of being in a war that you think I’m losing to unaware of or treat me as putting people risk at harm offensive therefore P accuse me offensive to blame me for peoples crimes and accuse me of racism (therefore what’s in jeopardy is how should we know when things will get better bad won’t happen and how can mass shootings be prevented convinced I’m “loser” “pervert” “in need” “pathetic” “bully” it’s safe to say the conclusion is that if I state: These mass shootings were viewed as my fault and caused because of who I am or what I represent or ridicule me being sick disabled on bumble can’t date because you don’t know why would I hit my head did no reason (not able to date) or attacked by men on bumble complain (doesn’t justify I’m weak pathetic or don’t know when things are good require effort or time not being important if dad is dying means — sadness not be me or family is a reason or liking men or women (a focus changed to make things go right or wrong for women a support change or complaining makes things worse never recover get well) means it’s believed mass shootings occur (don’t think I’m working hard enough or not paying attention shocking wrong the failure who can’t outfight a bully accuse me provocative unskilled or stupid to recognize a problem I’ve not experienced or accuse me of causing to treat me (what’s wrong spread makes slow or appears on others) accuse me enabling attacks weaken others (accuse me changing up dynamics or experimental) specifics are to not use diagnose as “excise” discuss what is about me you think causes another’s anger (blaming me for issues I’ve identified names business names of issue how have I not recognized as relevant to me therefore how should I not be scared or inappropriate stupid or too sick suicidal to care prevent and confront a belief I’m P and you think that crime occurs (because of me accuse me insensitive to type of mass shooter uneducated) accuse me changes to speak for joke (in the end prevention is not accusing my IMDb or any code of use the same as or obvious and crime the same as or obvious and accuse me of commuting suicide accuse me being tough or give up hurt by words because you can’t comprehend what’s passed or how it can be prevented because can’t get over (what I’ve done wrong) accuse me helping (unauthorized) so what’s the solution (not knowing what prevention is because you think I’m guilty and think whole code is ruined by mass shooters and accuse me subjecting others to attack hurtful (and blaming me for mass shootings? Don’t get my video or why I said “death prevention” accuse me not knowing how to care then wrongfully hurt me not allowed in public or to take a break accuse me being lead or mislead or on oath or of course like it’s something they can see and I’m told or protected (good things happen #scotus … I’m not sure what about being alone unsupported means what’s true) I’m simply acknowledging that if you think it’s my fault and keep broadcasting my story until memorialized you think mass shoutings is telling me I’m known and it’s my fault and accuse me of using sickness avoidant or brainwashed (1-2)

(2-2) -therefore focusing on what don’t like about me think is a code joke, is figuring out prevention (while I’m blamed or targeted accuse me of not being prevention or think responsibility means somethings my fault known or help doesn’t mean responsibility to state now that it’s clear I’m discussing mass shootings if not prevented or coding to me I consider as being my fault and need to figure out how that can be prevented not be accused as some macho walking into a fight brave mistreat me as sick well able future goal set scared term joke – I will never keep up with what you don’t like I’ve said ….

Therefore if you think every mass shooting is my fault or think I’m insensitive you think I’m guilty or the cause and believe I’m someone hurtful to everyone to know (inappropriate behavior obnoxious gay or inconsiderate of women or men not human or offensive) …. Ignore any campaigns previous or IMDb membership it’s clear no one likes that, thinks death is because of membership inappropriate, accuse me making up disability not making nigh deal with death threats think writing in public is not heroic (because of what I shared business card punching my head black eye and not well when we lost kobe and accusing my worry of titanic or comprehension of world war uneducated — so it’s become a possession cured whole by saved by become joke don’t believe my peace the clouds or what life means to me or seeing a huge owl …. You think driver of the plane helicopter was mislead by any truth you accuse me of possessing another to with a black eye or business card accuse tweet as a truth or my black eye made a helicopter crash accuse me of what’s wrong that goes wrong for a pilot because of what I’ve shared so the unsuccessful titanic submersion is likely to be (a belief in possibility of safe return no risk and worth the endeavor means you want my opinion on why or what’s true — conforming to what truth led or mislead things not working out means who in leadership is sick or made sick you’re accusing me of being a corporation spending millions on dollars on education or hospital accuse me of being privileged by go bys like I’m up top and don’t care who code empowers. Accuse me of being something hurtful and sick to keep me isolated. To watch me live life rejected difficulty not able to live life is a punishment created for what or which lives permanently affected by me (all the harm you accuse me bulldozing through life recklessly) and accuse me being retarded (“R”) (Having had a learning disability my whole life in the slow reading group at Carlthorp School a private school, grew up privileged a refinement mannerisms politeness tone and etiquette and look not respected and called “schizophrenia.”) not inspirational or fake professional joke …. Don’t care about when I was strong or heroic don’t care when I well working or proud of myself …. You can’t comprehend how is everything my fault and accuse me of being well (handling stuff not said like anything not said not easy made hard or wrong or “schizophenia” excuse to help me no it means everything’s my fault without hearing my facts and statements and thinking it’s s secret (crime communicates to me make fun of me being scared) accuse me of crime like I’m scary sending communications to innocent people dirtied by me (makes what not true or random fear) it makes not coding to me PREVENTION forget memberships RESPONSIBILTY means mass shootings are communications to me hurting me spirit is s can’t correct or negotiate fix what’s wrong so … schizophenia is hurtful because of who disabled improving has turned into no acceptance for me (accuse people of dying because I can’t see failed yo see the beauty of life don’t deserve to be well because you think war is some place gone for 10 years and accuse me dedicating 10 years taking a step back (make anything my fault) what should be fixed now is mass shootings whays the presumed. Cause Being away Not a jail prevention argument for me Common thread is communicated to. Schizophenia means no one well by. So here is me mentioning mass shootings while articulating how anyone was made to think everything’s my fault not liked or accuse my story or life to be about me being weird uncomfortable to accuse me of being mean not cool. Therefore “responsibility” is (people think being sued means many disappointed and then accuse me of being a disappointment made others give up or caused suicide or death to wrongfully accuse me of being insensitive or late to an upset or made to be upset accuse me or not comprehending what suicide mean thinks is an easy subject accuse me of faves an issue becomes an issue or an offender became something air joke asking for it insensitive not human joke.

Something hard to believe is that you think bounty Hunter joke is insensitive a serial killer caught of female empowerment something I missed out on in life not present for make fun of a by chance joke (clearly you think throwing a chair into my window is a joke about who I am or who I’m not) therefore so is everything else … instead of coding music film or membership or “P” word I’m going to focus on how was someone caught a woman survived make fun of my stories made up (then treat me as joke voices – make fun of not real wrong having memory noise accuse me making up an ugly story about being kidnapped and other women attack too (called me schizophenic) and now we can confirm mass shoutings are communications to me I should accept not medical records joke (discontinue participating in code) solution is focus on (prevention and stating well and here forward for each mass shooting figure out what I said wrong why it’s my fault how could it be prevented. And what could I have said better). I think that’s the best focus instead over analyzing what I’m like hectic sick self harming who cares if that’s the goal I can’t prevent that.

So life isn’t a thought joke (everything okay difficulty joke) so it’s not me making things complex. (I won’t discuss mental health anymore remove title not expose others) …. It’s a better use of my time and energy to write about how what’s my fault and what I know to establish what’s fact not yet fact realized fact could be fact or affecting prevention. As well as sadness giving up (shouldn’t be because they think I’m sick think communicated to or sex addict joke wrongfully accuse me of love being easy or monogamy a character)…..

My dream was a star @imdb Alexa. And song I played after #scotus. Not who I am that’s shame. Who I’m not alleged. And it’s about me getting sick hurt. So it’s not me doesn’t listen hurtful. Or a victim. Of abuse or let sex happen. Ask #cookscorner showed up after self harm (I’m not responsible a social media videos proof I visited the Judge in response was seen spoke to a bailiff. So I’m sorry that each conversation speaking to hospitals is what I’m judge for what sick by not saved it’s clearly an issue hospitalized or not continued sickness I’ve never spoken to mental health is easy lied or not viewed myself to recover not able to get sick again – hard to accept is I’m disabled … repeated issue is not being strong enough to present make effort and bobbed not feel good made fun of not sure of things represent me well a hesitation joke. Doing my best at 80k world wide (it was me purple headphones shouted at funny neighborhood friendly) which has become a six times shouted at P word conspiracy (conflict suicide OJ trees joke making fun of my footloose statement and stories about OJ or Nicole Brown Simpson Tanya Brown a gift Sydney’s grandmas rule. Memorized known issue (how do things happen not stated why my fault – making god jokes coming from me accuse me of in public and causing delusion imagine bad or accuse pants down focus joke or feels good issue make fun of vulnerability you make fun how others described make fun of my reports make fun of my books make fun of my love for self or women or men you don’t think anything’s cute or real accuse me of being offended by anything one way or another you accuse me of being clowned and that making people feel good to accuse anyone being shot or beat up as though a team is empowered and think that means I’m nobody then accuse me of being street forget who I am how others are can’t get over me in public nice to others and what’s wrong with me can’t get over applying Shorty awards can’t get over me not making money … make fun of my 911 call based on blaming me for everything calling me P punching my head not dating no friends accuse me of affecting anyone’s faith or vision then accuse me forgetful of how disastrous weather is then accuse me not being shocked about elder care and think taking risks (missed it don’t see or can’t stand not a life force didn’t like my comment about a pretend conversation with someone who’s passed as though it’s mentally ill to think a communication made to me my fault as because you didn’t see that as inspirational you decided to criticize me as insensitive accuse me of not helping Maui diplomatic blame movie reference for loss of innocent lives during an emergency evacuation (blame movie cutting edge) and then accuse me of failing to recognize the beauty of the 9/11 memorial because of hotel or where my brother lived, continue to accuse Chris Sonia or Justice Sotomayor’s name calling me out on what I’ve done wrong accuse me reading a book caused joke accuse me insulting a Yale Attorney professor at USC, or career coach recommended makes schizophenia what unreal or stupid untrue about me accuse my book as convincing anyone to be sick accuse me talking about life causing people to fail making fun of every issue witnessed in treatment and all the issues becoming of me and can’t get over 2-3 overheard comments and accuse me of convincing outside world or dangerous people my own people are mean to me (isn’t what being a marathon runner means)…..

Email 📧 (13) archive

I was told in 5th grade that one of my best friends since 3rd grade and known since Kindergarten was raped when she was 5 on an airplane to DC, why a friend request sent from Petelski (while a law student) was not accepted, and seeing an Upperclassman at the Dime exchanged numbers didn’t continue friendships (Group Photo at Dime) re-reading Santa Monica meeting Upper Classman female in recovery talking about his memorial I did not attend or know about to criticize me knowing or a rumor (about him hooking up with Maya Diamond related to Harvard movie actress wrongfully accusing me of bullying a guest at my house or making fun of my collages Latin book and what was written on it changed to in possession of the Twins make what true or wrong about me accepting or not friends with the which losses in law school makes me affected because (I was sent a friend request and tried to be friended by) before they passed away how does that make me guilty or connected responsible and why do my disclosures mean what about me or friend choices social skills or who I think I am (forget I volunteered at homeless shelter 2012) not aid joke or racist. Make relevant (LAPD killing my carpools sponsor Mike Petelski older sister on Venice relevant to her ex boyfriend wanting to hook up with me visiting me after jail have come to mean what about me or the entire Petelski family dying that not having sex was because of what or who I thought I was or because of a job 2008, friend of what LAPD never was close on any level dependent, or my upset my fault, or relevant being told Navid was a drug addict at the time he died meanwhile close to his Mother told he was schizophenic and none of his friends invited to his funeral make what I’m common to him punching my Brother at Shadi wedding who committed suicide founded brand T-Bags expose why would me slamming my head into the wall at 158 Anita not remembered or bullied my brother laughing or anytime swung at him make me schizophrenic or what he said hurtful then or true or a choice to be on meds or disabled (if I barely hit my brother no contact was made what does slamming my head into a wall 2017 have anything to do with Navids death seeing him by mall make recommending Dr Lim my fault or shocking is the false belief I hit people when I get hit punched bullied disappoint not one among issue thought less of and don’t know why changed and not knowing what changed bad about me expected to know or explain affecting family.

Email 📧 (14) archive

The Game – new Instagram feed 

Start listening facts stories 

Believed not believed changed 

Used to misread change 

Affect my look brain writing etc 

To make what true? To blame me. 

The game 

YEAR I FIRST POSTED TO SOCIAL MEDIA (2012) AFTER THE DEATH OF TWO FAMILY FRIENDS NAVID & SARAH (2010) WHILE IN LAW SCHOOL BEFORE HOSPITALIZED (2011) WITH A JOB IN DC AND WITKEN AWARD A’s THEN STARTED GOING TO AA. FACT SAW SARAH AT CVS, PICKED THEM UP IN HOLLYWOOD ATE AT KETCHUP, SHE WORE HAIR CLIP INS HER SISTER WAS IN SYDNEYS CLASS SHE WENT TO SCHOOL IN SAN BERNADINO SAW HER SISTER AT HARRYS BBQ A FRIEND OF HIS WIFE FROM DC. 

CONTROVERSY: Whether or not I was raped leaving Townhouse after a smoke separated from my BFF Heather who called me and already drunk got in a cab didn’t not drink more asked if I needed help (did not need help) how sex happened (what’s automatic), is no name no number passing out fed noodles asking for name number before he left to interview see him again Rape if he told me he was “Samoan” and lived at the complex next door with his Uncle, if I said he looked like Marc Jacobs, does asking “What nationality” proud I’m mixed a racist question have I ever accused him of rape no what prompted my sex life to be exposed 2010, whether TV Show B-216 with the same apt number as mine was about making fun of me. 

DOES NOT DATING WHILE WORKING FULL TIME AND GOING TO SCHOOL PART TIME IN A SUMMER TERM MEAN I DONT BELONG AT A JOB HIRED TO HELP KID CLIENTS UNPROFESSIONAL I WENT ON A DATE WITH A MARRIED MAN WRONG INAPPROPRIATE HOW AND WHY AND WHAT ABOUT BEING HOSPITALIZED (2009) MAKE SOMETHING ABOUT ME SECRET NOT KNOWN TO LAW SCHOOL OR WHO I DATE. WHY DATED DISCLOSED HOSPITALIZATION BEING ASKED OUT AT WORK NOT READY TO DATE AND CRYING ASKED WHY DO I SOUND LIKE A TRUCK DRIVER NOT READY FOR SEX YET BY OCTOBER MEANS WHOS MEAN OR SEES ANYTHING AS OPPORTUNITY OR PICK OR NOT PICK BY INTELLIGENCE WHATS INSULTING TO WHOM AND WHY (WHO DATED ME, CASUAL SEX, MONOGAMY, COMMITMENTS, WHAT WAS SAID TO HURT MY FEELINGS) “don’t think this is going to work out I want to date a smart attorney.” NOT HURTFUL DURING FINALS. WHAT WAS NOT SPECIAL ABOUT AARON AND I AND WHAT AM I BLAMED FOR AND WHY DID I GET Ds AFTER GETTING STRAIGHT As on Exams, MEAN SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH ME OR WHAT I DISCLOSE ABOUT CLASS AND LEAVING MEAN IS NORMAL. WHY TALKING TO DEAN AND DEAN FRYKBERG TO TAKE SEMESTER OFF TRAVEL WHY DID THAT HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH WHO I AM AS A PERSON OR WHAT CONCERNS ME, HOW SHOULD VISITING SCOTUS AND TAKING NOTES OR READING MY WRITING SEEING MY DRAWING MEANS WHAT ABOUT ME. Controversy is: Not why my teacher said “Melrose Place the remake” it’s why (2012) with two jobs and back in law school make Sydney’s comment controversial or hurtful is that (I tweeted openly removed left up and didn’t know left up, or why TMS for depression before Aurora has anything to do with anyone else’s grades in Aurora) so it’s getting Ds (2012) after working paid marketing (2011) in what ways has burn out or hospitalization been my fault and in what ways does hospitalization make me seem sick or non existent is the student I was before hospitalized matter. Unspoken assumption is that (Tweeting 2012 living in Marina del Rey telling my story or talking about life after AA rehab nostalgia unrelated to being taken off meds given a hard time sent to Rehab) why or why not Rehab (asking 1 more adderrall not prescribed but going to school part time working everyday 6am and going to night school on 2 pills only accused me of addiction I did not have dating with a boyfriend).

WHY DOES TWEETING 2012 AFTER DURING TMS SHARING STORIES PROFILE PHOTO LEFT UP OR TAKEN DOWN OF ISSUE ITS IN WHAT WAY WAS WHAT WAS SHARED ON TWITTER 2012 OR MY HEALTH OR GRADES NOT ABOUT HELPING OTHERS IN WHAT WAY IS AURORA BELIEVED TO BE MY FAULT? WENT TO CU MY THESIS A COPY IN LIBRARY TEACHER SAID SOMETHING FROM A DOCUMENT IN MY COMPUTER REVIEWING MY THESIS PUT IN TWO COLUMNS AFTER SCHOOL SHOOTINGS MEAN WHO DOES OR DOES NOT OR IS GUILTY WHY AND WHY WAS MY PROPERTY BINDER HANDWRITTEN OUTLINES INTELLIGENCE CHANGED (BASED ON GRADES) MEAN I WAS WRONG TO SWITCH CAMPUSES? OR LIBRARIAN BEING SPECIAL NEEDS OF ISSUE OR TOLD TO GO TO STUDENT TUTOR SESSIONS UNNEEDED AWKWARD NOT HELPFUL, BECAUSE I VISITED SCOTUS SONG MENTIONED MELODY DJ MICHAELANGELO SONG IN COMMON TO TYPE OF MUSIC AURORA SHOOTER A GRADUATE STUDENT RED HAIR COSTUME GASING MOVIE THEATER, IS RELEVANT TO ME (NOT FAMOUS, SHARING UNHELPFUL, TEACHER A THREAT, MORE MASS SHOOTINGS NOT A GOOD REASON TO CARE OR TRAVEL IGNORE TEACHER PHOTO AARON ASKED FOR OR A CLASSMATES FOOT ON THE BRICKS MEAN (HACKED) WHY SHOULD THAT SCARE OR INTIMIDATE ME WEIRD, ARE GOOD REASONS TO LEAVE TRAVEL. IF AA STARTED AFTER 2011 AND SENT TO AN OHIO MEETING BY CROSSROADS SPONSOR IN WHAT WAY DOES A MARYMOUNT SPEECH LOVING TUPAC OR IT BEING A YOUNG PERSONS MEETING RELEVANT AFTER SARAH DIED 2010 and went to MARYMOUNT WHY WOULD AN OHIO MEETING OR STATE MY SISTERS COLLEGE CONNECTICUT BE ANY REASON I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN OR BE MADE TO DISCUSS IN COURT TO SCOTUS IN WHAT WAY WAS PREVENTION POSSIBLE IN WHAT WAY IS MY LIFE KNOWN OR NOT KNOWN OR BEING VIEWED AS CAUSING SHOOTINGS IN OTHER STATES COLORADO OHIO AND CONNECTICUT RELEVANT (because therapy 2017/2018 made upset discontinued and common to practice therapy irritated on the inside upset), because I cried at a bar and who met me consoled me moved to Ohio. So what about me makes life seem everyone knows something I do not in common meaningful and in what way is my life as lived figuring out how to help not meaningful or inappropriate what issues were or were not helpful or make things my fault? And why is mental health being used to explain a condition I was to make appear or with goal of looking guilty lost or weird in common to publicized mug shots, what should catch up to me who is being victimized myself with disability or everyone else’s reactions to the time period (does things being quiet mean what’s obvious about trauma or school shootings and it’s effect on myself and my surroundings) in what way does traveling or moving help prevent a freeze encourage normalcy and in what way are answers found and in what way am I made fun of like (game is irritate me on the inside go nuts and accuse me of traveling or going places pissed off what’s the reality — inaction action clarity offense seriousness blame fault fame politics schooling my thoughts how others feel who I know who I don’t know why should people I don’t know mistreat me like I stand out or don’t belong in what way should I be viewed as a doesn’t belong misread of where I end up or what I do? 

Email 📧 (15) archive

Focus is on the only 3 psychotic reactions in my entire life: 

(2009)committing suicide swallowed bottle pills scratched my arm balcony lights tree, living West Hollywood, with boyfriend, abstract letter journal entry read and shredded, job apps, law school apps, job working for a year (no voices no history of psychosis or any bad reactions) took LSAT that year same score 3 times since 2006. 

Voices at 914 Harvard after texting pen pal, served at McDonald’s papers thrown into my window, visited Aaron, missed court, police came home next day, had slammed my head into wall bullied by voices broke 3 droid phones, no tv, upon sleeping head in my pillow getting voices shouting at my head clean sober on abilify prescribed 5 10 mg a day, not on drugs or abusing or buying meds at all. Cat dying of cancer I was taking care of, no history socialization after law school met no one no new friends stayed home law student no enemies no excuse or (delusion fear of group past known that hates me I hear not true) I’ve led great life. 

And shouted “f-king slut” 

Permanently took Todd away & didn’t move forward harassed dating Rob come back paced. 

Because I group email couldn’t type. 

So everything thought secret or judged my blog as looks good hides things expose errors. 

Is to caps lock online have psychosis in public discuss words in public sexuality discrimination look bad and then look bad to create and make a reality hate toward me cause mental illness … so never going hospital again because my life gets worse stop modeling because hates objective a weird face can’t type destroy writing & my life. All my cures since 2017 didn’t work … all my mistakes become motivation to attack me. My goals remain the same. 

Email 📧 (16) archive

Hello Everyone,

Adjustment phase after psychiatric 8 day stay, got sick day back two days up fell off schedule pushed myself to blog again since brain worked no voices in hospital so work on it at home … I self harmed (under pressure uncomfortable) not crying led to non stop writing (phase to delete is irritated curse words fight back like a yo mama mtv battle with hate words at me). Not engage give my power away goal is change back to positive continue share concerns keep everyone on a winning team show work done ease overwhelm fear … great visit at first victim site (wish had a folder mentioned brady) prayed and took my time told to walk around very nice location property. Made proper videos no fight tone not invite fight back or fight from. Do my fights erase get over back to proper thanks for reading my distress make today better day. 

Good luck thank you. Hearing me out. 

Okay today loss sleep skipped Geodone. 

Leslie Fischman 

IG @mymollydoll____

Twitter: @lesliefischman_

mymollydoll.com

lesliefischman.com

Blogging since (2013)

Legalzoom corporation (2016) # & pen name 

Paid dues and fees thousands dollars 

Simply Stylist event Tyra recommended LLC 

Sister in law – Skylar Grey + Eminem 

BFF – Sydney Simpson – OJ 

Sorry not feeling well can ignore thoughts mental health issues more important is that you are all well today better Geodone need sign up for IOP locally or PHP continue partial hospitalization. 

Email (17) 📧 archive

Took three days improve stats (75-77) and IMDb is green (the rest of the code has faith … how many people are not giving up forgive me) celebrate those working hard not blaming code only works by A team exposed scotus …. The same threat (stuck any level of smart) …. And I promise I’m not stupid or discouraging confidence it’s something everyone can work on (didn’t make it this time) think of everything possible like CNN focus stories …. It’s until you think of everything to prevent solve what could’ve gone wrong this time … shared issue (faith losses action giving up what is done not deserved — continued promise in prevention — losses hurt everyone …. Discourage a common failure to excuse code not working suddenly or a type of life knows too much anyone’s not doing well … as a general rule of thumb I’ve always viewed it as problematic when nothings interesting special you should be enthusiastic about books music film like meds not working … shows not value lost think why is this not pride solution perfection help accurate …. Creating an idea nothing works bad precedent ….

Email (18) archive 📧

Behind scenes admissions mental health issues effort report to who cares … smarter than me includes NY DA, maybe helping explained wasn’t guaranteed or discontinued the solution is effort so sorry made it seem like an easy way help work not done … it’s okay for me to go through changes be inspired help … I’m sure disability isolation concerns … sending emails hurts me to write and it’s too late and sick after hospital punched my head doesn’t feel good to have so many things to cover address in light of hospitalization … emails is not fun … so I am making an effort and keep twitter going stop erasing a caps legalzoom concern joke worrisome “fine then hurt me let me etc” not only did I convince me I’m bad first notice unnecessary. So I’m sorry Vyvanse switch issue I think if I’m humorous then addiction pills becomes issue so be careful what I say and my actions afterward I’m not a perfectionist risk taker and I’m sure what’s worrisome is not okay erased or not … so I’m sorry … and it’s because I couldn’t write well sound stupid it’s happening (lesson to learn) hurting myself doesn’t make anyone feel good and voices shouldn’t hurt and being strong writing well is solution because voices brief / solved by writing … not writing isn’t stopping voices so learn to adjust and be proper ….

Email (19) 📧 archive

OJ had a stack of playboys in his bathroom cabinet (fact) me modeling was after weight loss fired after someone had sed with me at work teamed up on unstable (after cancer), pretending to be CIA, with me respecting them then not respecting me, and did the issue on race nudity and sexuality to be represented in a grose way accuse me being a sex symbol and hate on me — compare move ridicule me (figure out your own likes dislikes sexuality and mental health without me) clearly misheard my 911 calls (it’s what hurts hurts voices hurt you shrink my head (b) cause me punch my head until head is small) not compassion for me as a patient then fuck my wellness and presentation (stopped writing quotes stop modeling stop writing scientific arguments and stop video and stop blogging until all the issues are written however staged as many times for voices to not hurt me and not hurt me as stated through me) …. Did next 10 years until the day I die I give up!

Solution (because I said solve voices without me here is my solution when forced to experience a problem over and over again until a same result occurs slamming my head into a wall to justify lawsuit — I don’t expose anyone to anything I’m not and after lawsuit I’m not responsible for defending myself as I was out worse version believed then defend myself against that hate) 

Sick a$$ pervert = punch my head. Pervert = punch my head. Punch my head = text no one. Shouting = no group therapy. Mass Shootings = no more hospital. Making me punch my head = call 911. Calling me a loser = punch my head. Disrespecting issue spotting and ability to speak well so no one’s hurt = doesn’t equal hurting me like I’m discussing anyone to be hurt then project voices to kill me outside of court = wrongfully killing me not respecting truth doesn’t mean Kazinsky and Manson died because of me or that slamming my head into a wall by voices trying to invest me using brothers friends voices wasn’t a cause slam my head into wall repeatedly on abilify was true and recovered …. Doesn’t mean head injury doesn’t take months and years (6 months) permanent or everytime I’m at peace (send voices to punch my head) expect me to record anything for anyone to see you didn’t appreciate me being accountable fixing myself don’t accuse me or causing suicide or any mentality anyone experienced difficulty by with trans and gay people successful and supported why would you harass me as a woman developing into a young professional disrespect me (I was fat my face couldn’t look was disgusting my neck protruding and belly) so don’t across me of not being body positive when issue stated deformed me to accuse me jealousy …. And calling me pervert accuse me of being gay … if I lived alone (2004-2017) dated or single academician worked hard —- at no time did I ever live a secretive or hidden life that couldn’t be in public —- calling me pervert change change my torso small my arms big head small — accuse me coming on to anyone …. When OJ gives up and I’m doing okay if you provoke me accuse me not caring or too much $hit going on to care clearly you don’t trust my decision making sacrifice my health to put me down to explain others downs …. I’m not losing project —- I’m successful … I can’t prevent voices healthy to say solve it yourselves (if I can’t prevent hate toward me) and it’s justified and changing my mood behavior or brain to excuse for it means I can accept not fighting not winning and continue to not be available to everyone continue set boundaries.

Discriminated on WordPress data hidden from me sent fake numbers inaccurate making fun of my organizational skills attention to detail work ethic and furthering a joke of people being me and not letting recognizing who I am as though I deserve punishment is not what’s deserved (you don’t recognize my hurt being insulted and their not strong enough embarssment and I’m not strong enough liable for anything anyone believes is not coming from me investigate my interactions ridicule me then I’m choosing be alone for next 10 years so you can stop disempowering me recognizing others happiness and not mind then take from me so people think I’m nobody or delusional further that treatment … use my numbers data to make money with your company …. (This blog post was not approved therefore I will not try using a distribution feature on WordPress because making fun of my bumble date and sexuality who I protected then hurting me protecting them like I didn’t protect them) I get tested! I could have died don’t accuse me sick or schizophenic if there’s a version of me you think isn’t viewed when I’m well then I will continue to get sick and never try again based on your distrust! Not worth losing everything over anx over again like who can tell joke you can’t tell I’m in love you can’t tell I’m smart and you think hurting me makes you smart or empowers others means you don’t view others special by me accusing me being mad special a move on social climber joke without consideration known in the millions not care making fun of me hurts morale of code in general like ok to Rob me make fun of me well that’s not how anyone was hurt given photos and money it means I got hurt and you hurt me again and I’m still not wrong and you’re still not right. lesliefischman.com/2023/05/10/your-odds-for-improving

Leslie Fischman vs CIA STOP HURTING ME 7 YEARS MAKING SCHIZOPHRENIC FACE VOICES JOKES. Stop accusing me of being strong no one bothered for 10 years … I don’t deserve to lose everything punish my head or be hurt by voices … my job isn’t the CIA, me being attacked isn’t a COS joke and I’m not a kidnapped raped joke light joke —- if you don’t believe I saw anything I’ve never seen don’t watch scary movies don’t RUIN MY LIFE accuse me of bringing anything on to any other figure … if you don’t recognize me alive worry being alive don’t hurt me accuse me of a fake rape cancer joke wrongfully hurt me …. Randomly going to hospital …. You don’t care about my story therefore it’s not important to be told since you don’t believe me think hospital is a joke doesn’t give anyone right to punish me …. You don’t know how law is made you don’t know why I’m alive you don’t know why people died you don’t know when things are good you don’t know who’s not making things good and you don’t know what love friendship or support is all you care about is how gay is made calling me pervert and what good did that do it made someone with high self esteem have low self esteem scared of everyone and weird around people!!!! #scotus — Making fun my scotus appearance accuse me of strategy or attorney experience I have no training no education no experience that makes what happens next a joke ….

I mature for my age. Instead labeled mistreat me immature. Accuse me being stupid. Like worthless to help me. Like I’m an offender. Mistake my love as molestation. Sue me accuse me out in harms way. Means you think I’m two people do you made me punch my head because you think I’m a study transition or offender made joke —- because you didn’t recognize who I am decided to waste 38 years of life and blogging and education as a woman turned into man joke or pervert gay joke to insult my pride and feminity to insult me privilege and protect women who pretend to help me who are not my mom and don’t love me and hurt me by being close to Todd and for there to be enjoyment like I’m a nobody trash name dropper joke when I MADE MY OWN PEN NAME and rose on Alexa with that pen name means I’m not known because of connection it’s my job as stated to not affect anyone therefore no one recognizes difficulty I go through to not make of issue allow for success people feel apart of them injure me like special by name … expect me to talk to unqualified people in life or make fun of me as a sucks dick for freedom joke or movie suicide joke (I’m not friending lying guilty shocking to mention “mass shootings” or anything said — as causing anyone to be suicidal is if my concern don’t accuse me of causing my concern exposing me accuse me of exposing anyone then hurting me inside — and my mom gets dick because you didn’t want Todd to love me you didn’t respect Rob loved me and voices were convinced to hurt me until alone act like I don’t do my job unless made go of need a fight to be strong or options to be smart it means …. You sacrificed my peace … accuse me affecting anyone’s peace when no one else is fighting for their life and being punished over and over again! #scotus

Driving to Hestrin’s office to complain that standing up to him resulted in accusing me of being abusive and people trying to jail me prosecute me and blame me for any other death and not caring if I punch my head think self harm or suicide means it’s my fault wrongfully misinterpreting what is helping or hurting morale and peace is not trash me or anyone like it’s okay not punish me stating (if happened to another woman you would recognize that to be wrong shocking hurtful do something) because no one cared about me being hurt (constant issue is why no one cares about my stability and what is reliable or true — my discomfort means my Dads going to get sick and die) or what Justice is served to who and why …. If you can recover without me don’t use me to be hero or accuse me prosecuting rumored not handling things politely by report call to Texas please someone visit him (so don’t accuse me of being responsible for his mothers death wrongfully accuse me of being sadness or thing doesn’t work out — disregarding my Fathers death disrespect me my body and book written terrorist attacked building ages of support … accuse me being off beat too much per age (sadness breaking pride) it’s as good as people make it, and if you suffer meaning me …. That was my best and nothing better can prevent voices accusing me of being smart or mentor like everyone is kids younger make fun of my love for Todd means you decided to shrink me use me up make me a purple joke because you didn’t respect me waiting being a good human being! #scotus

No one cares … My Dad died. My Mom got Brady Cardia collapsed. Blood Pressure is Low Today. Is no excuse give me voices cause me to punish my head criticize me or accuse my limits as not rationale. Maybe who hurt me is okay … and maybe that’s how life works you cause suffering to who you don’t respect and then you blame me for anyone else’s suffering … so what’s too late is you don’t respect my take as “precaution” you think it’s okay hurt me (speaking at court is a joke or submitting documents) wrongfully accuse me going to the hospital a let down accuse me suicide … Never going to hospital again … maybe you guys don’t know when to stop based on my disclosures and you don’t care if my Mom loves me with preference hurting me so I punch my head …. Ruin my family my home my neighborhoods peace …. When I say STOP MASS SHOOTINGS it’s because my blogs work people read … hospital isn’t a blame me joke give up joke (voices give up on me ruin my life) and you think it’s funny to see my parents upset with me or not able to get a job … so you know what’s pathetic is everyone working paid and no one establishing a campaign addresses what’s working accidentally me making up stuff online that doesn’t work accuse me making explosive statements (why is it okay to make explosive insights as to me accuse me reading into) read mg will lie to me tell me to work and express hate to me accuse me of being hurt and not having hurt or been abnormal around any boyfriend or doctor …. Means online (if abnormal state is caused by voices insult) means voices don’t respect my diplomacy being strangled visiting OCDA … think it’s ok hurt me after hospital watching texts accuse me befriending young woman accuse me of being gay or not a loved role model means my discomfort is a win for voices and making fun of my moments of inspiration in life like breakups are easy … went ER several times attacked by voices means having a companion was preventative (not too much) now that the subject is “mass shooting” prevention we can discuss (why hospital attacked home accuse me giving up because I recovered) so now if made sick punching my head (I’m not going to treatment or hospital) and won’t talk to anyone based on (disbelief what I’m alive for a continued justification trying to put me in jail well blogging with a job) hurt me repeatedly for getting upset that I was being prosecuted like anyone’s sick or dead because of me act like spreading a rumor that anyone died because of me is okay to darken my image is not cool to look at my face read my work is not cool to see me naked is not cool and destroy any future possibility to talk to Todd isn’t fair therefore I’m not dating anyone based on an attorney didn’t respect me traveling or moving forward and doesn’t remember me handling things professionally without incident or worry talked to the police and continued effort to treat me as obnoxious when well or accuse me stupid as drunk and think that anyone complaining upsetting my Mom in New Jersey is joke or waiting go hospital based on my mom crying or a new car is a joke (if you don’t think I deserve to look good and think making me look bad is a stupid way to say I talk bad to others or to myself then that’s the joke —- accuse me preferential or sweet loving to Todd accuse me being different person online to all the reality is life is however you are able to speak and the tone matches how serious the issues are and my wellness isn’t an undeserved survival mean I’m an idiot or offended by anyone else’s innocence accuse me of not looking or being innocent. #scotus

What’s too late is punching my head repeatedly after my limits were not respected (I don’t need to be hurt to not be able) I think I’m a good decision maker …. Back off and don’t try for things in life anymore (what’s unreal is why anyone thinks anything is to look good prove look good or why (worse condition is made or mental illness is because —- you think I needed to change bad before you don’t recognize intelligence think joke … you wrongfully accused me of cheating (as academician or accuse me of dumping when I get dumped heartbroken) and it’s you misinterpreted my dating history or what I appeared like …. So I can’t change the terms to provoke punishment suicide (is in defense of relationship lost) … misinterpret innocence (accuse my life at a level another is not given access to mentally) …. If status (misinterpret ethical decision …. In class dating as a choosing smarter or daring who reached out to me an experience joke ….) we are all innocent until people feel offended to be strong angry towards you (man or woman’s heart) doesn’t mean I’m wrong or something my fault worse off (therefore a better place attacked to be worse place to make right who attacked me and self harm and jail is the joke or jobs blog or don’t blog is the joke over what’s right or wrong accuse me of being limited (to stay out oc trouble) accuse me for having legal strategy to make recent suicide or arrest (I’d you don’t think 2009 permanently damaged me as person hard to connect to others …. Damaging me more accuse me sexuality or cheating …. I’d treating me as devalued residing joke mistakes hurt … accept that I am myself accept that I’m not responsible when I get hurt and people can’t get away with interpreting me as destined to not well place … somethings wrong known is my dad died something special now is meeting up …. Therefore it’s not me who doesn’t make people feel special … it’s the continued view others innocence and view me offensive …. Don’t believe another is joking and make fun of me as offended accuse me intervention or judgement (everyone nice what’s sought Is everyone mean) when hospital no voices (what entitles voices home) …. Concentrating on who I love being shot is upsetting shocking not known and not my fault (therefore not protecting me if that’s the solution isolation and prosecute me as sick) then what was my gift earned 38 years was not being judgmental and because I asked why is this person well forgiven studied not seen as hurtful why am I pushed made to change from quotes life advice blogging to (voices I said stated hurts therefore no time future given punishing my head … don’t respect my privacy not texting anyone ask for no help).

Issue is if I lost how I’m hurt Then I’m hurt by what I says hurt Then I’m hurt with no solution Subjected voices And who should I be made to talk to and why am I made sick go back hospital …. Missed in person Appt .. sick by next day can’t go … job rejected no reason …. Treated as too much unsolved issues switch mind places joke …. To now (having spoken again voices hurtful — with one post describing hurt and deleted …. Means respected my first recognition of topic too much …. So repeated condition too much topic to hurt me (then hurt me like my future doesn’t exist like a monogamy cheating joke —- peace is with me or stays with another or wellness is see me ignore me hurt me test)

September 2 tweets (study me repeat what’s read is a vertigo joke controlling me accusing me not being in control of myself). 

Removed day 14

Not strong enough to drive 

Goal: Drive to OC (make sure at 130 lbs show new hair – sorry my body is fat is grose now everyone) … by tonight or tomorrow write a post (after having given everyone chance to prosecute me beat the $hit out of me trash my story ridicule any job or friendship or date treat me out of place doesn’t belong) once everyone has a chance to fight disturb cause voices after hospital cause me illness (when the peace satisfaction with destroying me is done fighting — let this not be formula for worry or allow and worry and hurt and get strong or not need and torment and be over it and if everyone is where they want to be the rush to hear my perspective is based on — not whether I need to forgive — now it’s can I be forgiven approaching how suicide feels and what it’s shotgun how it’s made triggered and tested off with sympathy prevented not by membership humiliated ….

Tired … too tired to drive. 

Start blogging tonight, not lose all progress, if made to address, address issues even if hurt with a likelihood hurts me more than others issues I lose my health to, I’m sure I’ll get better at explaining what hurts and why and I’m sure that’s life you get hurt before things get better and it’s my job to accept given a hard time or hurt move forward figure out what’s important to me not get hurt by fighting teams against me like a two team tennis match that I constantly lose to teams to in life … #scotus

I support Taylor Swift there were shootings and stabbings on transportation so when I drive concerned in that way on the freeway her album isn’t about me doesn’t have anything to do with me is for her fans and their lives and their reality so don’t injure me like I’m sick with a new car and support accuse me of not being happy or not well positive nothing can fix my health no money no job no relationship nothing so allow me to be positive stop accusing me of changing of being an inspiration seeing things or not put together patriotic isn’t the problem even if I’m made fun of those are their ideas their lives their money I’m not alive successful well by any terms … and I’m not going to jail get anything. People can admire respect anyone … nothings about me exposing myself … you make your own lives jobs and make love with your own lives don’t accuse my life as made in sin chaos or sickness!  Those are my concerns.

Email 📧 (20) archive

Defamatory photo untrue (weird after exposed).* 2016 – not at all similar 2022 – modeling Lawsuit meme? Bc told Petelski story Slammed head wall Punished Issue conflict not close LAPD LAPD put me in jail not close to me Meme (why on knees w/audition video) Lastly photo w/dad how see it And imitate my photos Why thought making fun of me Then ever since Every woman and man comes down on me

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Recently noticing put under pressure treated as guilty or having information made to talk about things then treated like can’t talk to people I know making me talk mention (because I noticed discomfort if talk about) 

Email 📧 (21) + archive

Twitter Statements – Important 

Basically we said you can improve your job to figure out how between today or tomorrow … that’s how quickly court support is turned into additional pressure or reminder of something not right about you changed … ultimately whatever was wrong with me visible to others … I can’t change about myself …

Since the bailiff stood up close to me … here’s a Judge a new person a new story new people to present to. And now is my test can an agreement be made and followed without me being hurt or anyone else … and I’m what way do I need to improve not on the basis for what was tough or sounded delusional about … it will be about whos love is schizophrenic … so this is how you get made responsible for others … is how a man is protected … Judge who is strong and bailiff checks you connects (protects her) so by tomorrow share something positive (show up to be open to discussion with new mistakes) and either accept I’m hurt or mistreated as jumps from one guy to the next healthy …. Is testing my tolerance for pain or threat and punishing me outside of court … accusing me of creating for emergency ….

So tomorrow improve accept time lost not speaking to the Judge myself as a result I suffered and learned what life is like being told things accuse me of pretending to help like I’m communicating or managing a project that’s easy to solve by medical records …. Ultimately whatever’s wrong with me makes no sense why you need my medical history … I didn’t ask for an excuse and based on reading my court papers assuming I love who I spoke to for 3 years …. Is accusing me of being inappropriate like you know him better than me accuse me of not taking good care of who I love and act like stealing roles as caretaker is some joke … ultimately if things get worse and I don’t have the money … I can’t complain about what work you did what separation you thought necessary …. Treat me as a homwrecker or low class woman like I don’t represent myself or apart of Asian pride I haven’t even seen you …

Here forward going to focus on why to improve and no matter how long it takes to keep up with or mention anything ongoing of concern (I know I was seen in court today) to please excuse my writing online trying to describe a difficulty making fun of what I recognize as being difficult after lawsuit … is some kind of isolation fear based … to see how do you respond to losing everything or to joke or professional gusto in what way have you been mischaracterized to be someone not worth representing … on the basis of things getting worse after I took my favorite photo during after a 14 days court order hold from pen pals accusing my trauma free face as doing better in court order because I took a nice photo so maybe that’s why I was scrutinized as breaking a rule (how would she know if I’m spoken to him and that’s creating a system of rejection through a woman hired as attorney to treat me like he feels safe talking to her telling her on me – as some kind of who’s stupid or being treated unprofessionally … I published my own work statements myself — if it’s too hard to manage what I am or am not doing and if I’m made to appear like I’m hiring an attorney to manage a crisis I created then that’s subjecting me to being inapproaprpropriate not having viewed what my conversations to him are like … telling me no like it’s to shock me hurt me like I’m someone who loves someone secrets I need to be told who or what’s of value rustled like I don’t know how to treat a man … I can represent myself … my coming to be has nothing to do with anyone’s status as important … so if scaring me asking for more money to reported to treat me as taking to someone who is asking for your help is to hurt my confidence in life and ultimately … no one will understand what causes stupid – what is empowerment what’s offense and what’s unprofessional or waste of my honesty be treated like I don’t manage myself well make fun of what I sound like scared talking to someone who I think is going to help me … is how you get hurt not better ….

Today I accept although a good experience in court … work on staying well think I spent a good two days recent posts back illustrating that I recognize difficulties and tomorrow and with appreciation for some progress made today … show how I plan to improve and after sharing that I have been careful and life’s not a game everyone’s figuring out or learning privileged to or taught … so this is discontinuing companionship missed appearance in court to hear my heartfelt necessity to be privileged to talk to someone I love asked court for permission …

The bailiff came up close to me so he got an accurate read on me would know if something was wrong guilty or not right … when someone who’s job is to protect the Judge, is literally standing in front of you (it’s like getting to recognized as protective respectful …) 🇺🇸🩵

The exotic dancers being supported by a Broadway insurance company USA groundbreaking recognition of women who perform and well enough to model entertain others as belonging to a field of women who are being respected more because of a famous adult business participant who is still recognized for her lawsuit even though her attorney failed she is no longer suffering from misinterpretation … means who is put in jail … is an example of someone featured on Fox News and not hiring me and as a result he represented himself … is a (-) example attorney. Which makes my tire being fixed relevant as to him going down hill and prosecuted … illustrates in what way are successful attorneys being made to look stupid and what would cause them to mismanage funds of a client why would you seize control over money (which makes us rethink what was going wrong how was a bad decision made) I made one call to Omelveny that’s helping and we literally watched him lose his mind go downhill and no one knows why but we believe how easily people can get in trouble. w/Trump ADR liked by both, if there’s no fight toward me recommended to go to keep families together that was the only advice I was given …

Everyone was too high up at her reunion but dressed appropriately was just made aware that my high school has been labeled as funded by Jewish names and endeavor was listed as a job opportunity networking for alumni … always believed in Ari, Mel Gibson was a fair fight because if he was permitted to work again and an example of being banned from performing and disappeared for decades he’s been punished long enough to not make fun of who is motivated to embrace positivity and I don’t think that anyone’s story famous is anything I view myself as not in tabloids like I’m privilege or protected … our paparazzi photos in Malibu walking to sushi were never published paparazzi chased us to a bar mitzvah and wanted a photo … ultimately being special is your only experience managing special … I’m sorry I didn’t rewrite my Dads eulogy I read to him in the hospital by the time we got comfortable talking again … he was more positive enthusiastic about how well I was doing and believed in me.

So today was a long day didn’t take a photo at gas station before I left to court made it there on time lesson is it’s good to keep a record of how you appear when well lesson is no matter what’s up against you in life it’s you and a Judge with more experience witnessing people and based on her enthusiasm for the day if she’s feeling capable that’s a confidence worth sharing and dressed up fun means in spite or relapsing and addressing how life has changed by different treatments … it was helpful to finally be given an opportunity to talk to a DA and a Judge and be allowed to be struggling and it’s okay to care about all the things I’m concerned about reassured that that’s not mental illness so after being given a violation number I was not observed to be violating its to describe to me what type of person is not supported by the courts believed in getting well … in the end being strong on my own and losing a very personal experience in life special while be punished told no and talked to like I keep talking to someone (accuse me of bothering someone to figure out what’s wrong or not staying well a risk of harm or reject joke and ultimately how you get hurt is by what you figure out to be hurtful and why … is the lesson on what court is about if you have a solid understanding of why you were not helped and if you shared privileged information not valued as effort be accused of selecting a DA and pretending to be a victim and make fun of you for being hurt by a fan site accuse you of overreacting is mistreating you as not chill appreciative like you are someone who is made aware or more or less skilled by people you are being mistreated as helped special is how and why someone is treated as stupid or made scared to believe that they are going to jail and to let someone who you’ve hired to represent you misunderstand the issues …. If someone thinks you are going to jail and think’s seeing your medical records is what the Judge needs to excuse something that someone I love has a question with that’s hurting me like I don’t support how he tries to help … in the end it’s my story my faith my purpose destination in life so if one thinks you’re going to jail and hectic on the basis that you’re being scolded for doing something you’re not doing that judge is telling her you’re doing wrong that’s treating you like you talk to someone and be accused of talking to someone and then be made scared see how you feel when you are made to feel caught like attorney punishing you with your forms filmed out makes any sense about what’s necessity for I think … if it’s my condition reputation to fix that’s my job to address losses in what way did I not ask nicely mistreated as some sex experience chat like I think I’m sophisticated rich or important … to privilege someone to care for my case it’s not a losing hand … I’m still alone doing well I’m not guilty and although you may be testing how bad things are to determine guilty by your own metrics your not the CIA and you cannot tell whether I’ve done something wrong accuse me of asking for help … when I addressed court myself in what way did I not present issues relevant to illustrating I’ve been through a lot I am not subjecting who I love to bad luck (or be experimented with head gone) like technical difficulty is a dui joke memory joke …

Who are the immigrants bused here who have traveled her to work (we are in a period loss and risk assessment) Welcome to California (you’re not to your circumstances are are valued) please recognize that CA is state that has been through a lot and recovered and back to normal so disappointment that there’s no work doesn’t mean that you’re too late (work jobs are for people who have access to jobs so maybe network and figure out a system for getting started if you are concerned about where you were bused to and what’s disappointing … you are in an engineering state (people who work from home) I recommend placing adds to run errands do chores be security guards for people in tech I think people will pay for people who are able to travel, please get your shots and avoid mental health issues or drugs … plenty of people who need help. Re: bused immigrants.

What’s not cool is everything wrong with you and trying to solve who is the ultimate force you must face making fun of you being separated from family and friends like you have ever experienced being alone or separated in a way that you have gotten sick ….

No scary lawsuits …. Any bad investment is not a joke over money and therefore I should not be made fun of lose everything or be tested disabled given a hard time a watched driving lost in OC for on time and getting tired and ultimately that shows that if radio isn’t working a phone isn’t supporting you ultimately you have to figure out how to get to where you need to be on the basis that it’s important and what’s too late … I think when it’s your life and you make an extended effort to represent subjects after discussing why relevant without amplifying your blogs or photos or buying followers … ways you can get hurt working hard is when tech doesn’t support you to be treated as a fire joke like giving you a hard time is a recipe to explain any uncle in New York who has difficulty talking ultimately I was thought to enough to think about life totally with respect for who fights for everyone and maybe that’s why I’m fought like I don’t recognize what fighting is for accuse me of making any woman’s life more difficult or be some loser or risk basket case ….

I am Jamie FOXX means although I get made fun of like me being scared isn’t okay or think it’s adderrall or stuff I’m thinking can’t solve is undermining who I am as a person and my entire life so excuse me for not wanting to be used as an introduction to subjects or be made to empathize with those who are facing more difficult transitions in life and not be proud of my mom and all the nurses she helped who cried when she had to close her company and all the people she’s helped and trained means that when have I ever not respected women in my life or had problems – beginning with a boyfriend thinking friendship going out is flirting I think ultimately you get separated from who you’re an adult with and maybe that’s to solve what’s of issue for who attends a better law school is it that you have infidelity is it that you are hurt or possessive is it that you were not pretty in a photo that he was well in taught me that if you don’t know what happened to your face fix it don’t worry about all good photos the gay decorators made your mom take down minimalism not pictures … you know people who are successful and around to help you will be the same people you don’t want to be made to seem like you “don’t show to an appointment after syphallis got a penicillin shot” made fun of Uber driver not taking you to your appointment and you being punished by dr Lim who took care of you when he wants to retire move back to the Philippines and you get questioned as to whether you fear disease or think it’s a joke or make fun of your appointment with no patients present accuse you of becoming people who carry disease say you’ve been exposed to aids hiv Bc of who your doctor is and accuse you of being done dirty by who you’re set up with on Tinder – so that’s working on rekindling things with a friend overtime … and getting voices and taking a cab to the valley to combat what (voices I’ve not written about or sought medical attention for and has caused me to hit my head), so that’s treating me as being told something true or untrue based on what is known about you accuse others of being unhelpful (maybe that’s why you get ignored left struggling) so this is the test of faith am I someone who miss a good opportunity to learn how to represent myself do I miss a chance to help a situation by submitting documents then accused of hiring an attorney like I don’t know what to do or am saying something wrong or am introducing information that doesn’t explain how I could love someone hurt, it’s because my conversation was read and Bc it took a long time to be loving and improve … means based on eric majors who was forgotten all that was memorialized was bumble and that makes me look bad like I wasn’t allowed to try dating not having yet been confronted with mass shootings making fun of a conversation with someone who didn’t trust me with a number not willing to meet up means although we shared genuine cares opened up about membership to Brady and equally frustrated that’s not about sex if I’m working on talking to people … is a threat to me like I create special anywhere I go no I have one campaign and one life and it’s not a game and it’s not confusing or disorganized ….

of my body dysmorphia accuse me of not accepting myself to accuse my first feeling of being grose and ugly why would that hurt Justice Ginsberg’s feelings therefore based on my reaction at her funeral the only one speaking and for a funeral to take place of a woman who was so smart she survived and lived to witness my horse to Ferrari deduction about how much life has evolved that’s very special (it will matter once you are considered as not thoughtful loving caring considerate I think if you’re not strong enough to message with Justice Ginesberg make fyi of your conversation it’s to say that there’s some scrutiny about – my disability existing when or by what disclosures is my recognition of what bad advice is to accuse me or subjecting my friend to being devalued she was always someone who tagged along available it only matters if you become separated capitalize on a problem shared to a friend by text it’s to say a problem has gotten worse to accuse you of thinking women are speaking poorly of you is why you get made to look crazy and get treated as unimportant or will be until you’re uncomfortable experiences I’m life get misunderstood as genetic or accuse you of watching material or having experiences sexuality by yourself (I think there’s beings a Virgin) I think that there’s looking pretty in photos I think there’s losing friends I think when collected all the bad can be used to say you’ve not changed for the better by being alone not being social and not smoking weed or drinking in what way is your life supposed to help who knew you in life would be to illustrate that I’m not the cause of recording losses or insensitivity be made fun of and since schizophrenia and disowned were issues brought up to me to not mention. Then respect that who I care about wants me to move forward on the basis that those losses shouldn’t not have occurred (and calling bazelon means I’m aware that people should not pass away due to any medication or lifestyle circumstance) and that showing a picture from jail doesn’t mean I’m not cool for not hooking up with major it seems like (it’s a constant test of whether I am important patient or a Judge who is vulnerable to me and how can I help others by recognizing that they’re interested in talking to me about a difficult loss, and unwilling to accept that someone with disorder or meds who I recommended wlac not my doctor (don’t accuse a Filipino doctor as being the shocking fact about about life or make fun of his poster loves you loves you not, if I get tested and vaccinated and have dated nice men I’ve never had experiences in life like I’ve not been helpful or insensitive to others …. When you get told what to do like you don’t know what to do that’s how you get treated like you are going to jail making fyi of your faith retaliate on you how would you feel if we’ve been having meetings and court appearances without you paying money for work being done without talking to me is some kind of introduction to a concept making fun of who I love as proud and treating me like wellness sexuality is a joke or a club of people who are made to trust eachother or accuse me of liking someone by face at a crime scene, I already knew his name messaged him to be in OC I recognize cspan as who’s I’m charge so that’s making fun of me reporting something like I think I’m in charge observant

At my high school reunion someone shared their memory of my father he was heroic was called out of bed to be notified that people breaking into my house the night I had a kickback never sure how that happened or why a brick was thrown into my classmates house car window and what that means about life. It’s everything of value I keep everything doesn’t get lost or stored means if I’m experiencing disappearing ruined things of value means I was upset my moms storage got flooded water ruined my notebooks from college (true story website with school work campaign save everything data losses I feel like happen to people who seem like they have a lot or are smart going on a momentum of things being good a true test of characters occurs like today even if no one will help you phone is giving me a hard time need directions to court doesn’t mean life will happen any better or worse being on time there’s no lesson in what talking to a DA is like you learn once privilege is and that’s your first opportunity sharing your concerns without going through anything you haven’t spent all night thinking of everything you have lost Bc of who you are and then being someone capable of making things better even if you responded poorly to who tries to help you or convinced you that your freedom was tough to negotiate requires some medical proof of something to prevent you from going to jail … as far as I’m concerned no medical records or health status education was questioned or my outfit (I went bold as a model who now hooks up and doesn’t bother who gives me love shows I’m a responsible busy woman … I think driving 100 mph to court lost frustrated lost and then ending up on freeway in right direction finally meant that speeding will not get me there any faster if I was on time and too late … if I get to court today … I can complain email attorney and that’s my first experience being hurt and punished like I’m stupid or let in bad connections or demons and I’m tired of being made fun of for caring for my mom I have known her my whole life and remember when she was supportive excited about reading my book and finally something we could talk about recognizing that she was not able to publish her book … this doesn’t mean that anyone’s book or editor is being made fun of for work done to work on a book with my mom which I’m sure was therapy and I think I read through it briefly wanted to send to sydney before my suicide attempt 2009 in a santa box that copy went missing and my moms copy in binder (so this is being studied … this is how a period in time in which you have wanted to study the past or who’s relayed to the case see what people think about it is not the problem what is the problem is what you are suddenly not well by or not cool by what is wrong is by what you want to know more about … so this is how honest handwriting 

 in West Hollywood making fun of the first time I processed with my friend the loss of her mother and now attending law school and being relayed as message from her father is making fun of me having work experience as a crisis hotline counselor making fun of my research paper like I didn’t write it thoughtfully use work that a deceased naropa student donated to the crisis hotline I was organizing a garage sale for, please don’t make fun of my effort to get funding from neighborhood known for philanthropy as a law student who visited scotus and having time to volunteer try to help and learn how to help this occurred 2015 living in Santa Monica after I left my job – to make light of me losing my job to a company based on my brief interaction with BBDO and they won an award recognized that being aware of who’s out there helping and keeping track of a marketing thing is important later in life when people want to know what or who are you successful  for what have to showed about yourself being strong caring about your body which was much bigger plus size compared to women now it appears regular sized so that’s making fun

That was are you real loud and proud confidence test – who are you alive for who are you going by no of course if everyone’s is doing their best and if I’m sure of my commitments in life …. Means I’m recognized as caring preventative and concerned or detailed in a way that no one is made to look bad feel bad or be punished by me … so if I was viewed as don’t talk to him, and a 3 word agreement and shares to my attorney mean that I am well because I didn’t take risks I made friends in public carefully I didn’t need to do drugs I can say no if I’m being support friend connected to cops and they made a checkpoint the night I was driven through by a suburban they know who found me at a bar to let me know he’s been attacked in what way (am I not reliable or anyone who doesn’t belong gets beat up or not recognized as beautiful).

The beach run was your first reaction to getting and recognize that you have health insurance and let no code of comprehension of who or what messed up critique a quote negative doubtful of womens fate like I didn’t write over it Bc picked a quote with s doomed fate in what way should I be criticized as having doom or gloom or accuse me of being anywhere knowing I look bitch making fun of what going to a bar preferred by by an older brothers friend that smelled I complained in what way am I not cool for going out after bumping into my brothers friend showing him my boyfriend and in the bar a guy came up to me and stayed singing what’s gay or too old for what bar scene … if a boyfriend was introduced to a girl who was nice to me don’t accuse me of knowing why I would meet one person, who was mature with my boyfriend and most intimacy on the basis of in what way should I have experience with another woman being nice to a man I like only two people in the world other than Qs who know me. Being forced to walk everywhere doesn’t make you a cool person I got lucky meeting someone nice I’m sorry if that looked cool or Bc of looks or money I’m not given money and I wear regular clothes and am myself so this later version of a woman is about modeling going for professionalism …. That means I deserve a wage so please don’t accuse me of affecting the significance of Juneteenthnpr being a great example of someone who works who isn’t recognized to work and when work you’re proud of expects for it to be described in a way that someone can bit or or a woman can recommend to another I think innocent moments when I was put on meds was not performing sure about blogging and new to fighting and new to knowing my facts and appearing in court and know to improve for the judge that’s having faith that if I do as I’m told it won’t matter who I love or what I was important it means if I recognize a solution to be well to help others that means I was allowed to talk about my problems on twitter and challenge mentally that requires me to think and putting it into words again what I’ve thought what decisions I’ve made to show how and why I am strong and not haphazardly online risking or gambling with my health, I think I took a gamble agreeing to not talk to who I love without defending myself and make the extended effort to improve and overcome doubt as to racism covid recognition of harms or where hard on you is coming from and to show up with your life practically a mess and journaling starting over sobriety … and making the decision to get well and stick to an oral agreement made in court with a Judge who’s enthusiasm deserves a fair share of credit for stating well and also recognizing that I’m not one to let anyone be hurt based on something I can fix myself ….

I’ve stayed home haven’t worked based on working on being in a place I can work for family it’s unfortunate if you get bullied look bad or tech issues that just makes you look bad or scrutinize you like you’re future is ruining if you get judged as ant take care of self accuse you of being a joke daughter of a doctor accuse you of getting sick to mischaracterize you dad as guilty to read into what my family was like I became louder and didn’t complain about losing things or being robbed ultimately those are ways you get hurt made to look like you have an issue (so that’s how you go from having pictures with friends) to Jay Z making a “black album” in common to your black photo album to make fun of you as robbed by people who are celebrities represents schools you’ve overheard a producer in common is not to highlight what about the past is not what’s wrong with me or what life is like (no one can communicate to you what’s wrong with you) until you have a problem (with how people communicate) I don’t think talking about upbringing is helpful when if my brother is being made sick and if this was a sick plot to accuse my family as being dark or accuse anyone of having oases who was not cared for or make fun of an effort made through bazelon whatever there was to remember you for doing well (going out of your way to care) ultimately after being hurt it will be up to me to prove again that I care and to what extent until bullying stops. Judge helps by giving you time to get well that doesn’t mean that things will be instantly well Bc the judge hopes that I improve I recognize I have no one to talk to that’s my loss (that relationship can’t be replaced) and based on what the Judge said (think how am I going to show that I appreciate having my life be difficult losing everything and to be credited for appearing well — after all that’s been said (in the end how to appear to a Judge who sees tons of professionals attorneys law students knows what criminals are like has witnessed what is provocative ghetto or appeared to be wrong with you sexuality to make you appear like you are showing yourself to prove what, if you’re ever struggling and go out of your way to let your guard down and be judged know that it’s not by who admires you it’s by who is proud of you that’s where trust starts and Judge so that’s the lesson … at least a few people want me to get well.

I’m lieu of losses to not appear like I’m going through anything challenging selfish be viewed as not choosing to be fun I was equally lost by music on radio unresponsive on my way to court … that was a struggle why I started sharing how I was gifted CDs by Michael Jackson and why being an adolescent in a special home and saved Polaroids was a good experience (although I crashed a golf cart and lost driving privileges), ultimately what bad occurred for someone sued for molestation is to hurt me like I’m being given a position of trust accuse me of studying life coaching and not being responsible to take care of another woman to harp on who’s taking care of who to punish me like I’m taken care of accuse me of being suddenly successful like I would go through anything and make any woman have to make an effort to be positive who believes that something good should happen and based on the Judge appearing more confident than me, that’s my first agreement in court …

Solution (take the risk state something you think is important) either you find yourself in a better place able to show how a solution can be made for a problem with problems by sharing all day under pressure after ER things being worse untilmately if the Judge doesn’t see you as displaying mental illness in court doesn’t mean your gone belong in jail or think schizophrenia is some excuse or medical records to keep you from jail treat you like you accept a diagnosis undergo treatment like that’s system of disability (I think when you are made to be scared – another atttorney believes in you based on you story doesn’t feel like you’re the problem too late or what’s unforgivable about disability in life or have conversations you’re made to be scared of made fun of like anyone tells you what to do when you’re told you’re going to punished have done something wrong …. This is my first agreement with a judge in words to not talk to someone I love so far things are difficult I will have to arrive to new solutions online I’m front of everyone based on recent relapse tested like I think solution is a joke so this is the basis of being recognized as not hurtful (getting sick by the end of the day) just means I’m not well like I was on time to court … being prepared for court is a big deal I’m not teaching coaching I don’t have experience with representing myself or other issues or have bad easy time being treated like I don’t respect the community being who I am getting arrested is accusing me of not belonging in Hollywood or advising me of being investigatory or hurt by no one was cool by the bar I brought my sister to, in the end if I don’t feel good or have a reaction punished a wall and broke my bracelets that shows I’ve reacted to a challenge about what being wrong with me that my sister has not approves of is making fun of me as being small by my sister I immediately knew after Aaron and self harm not moving forward in life those were acknowledgements of my family that doesn’t mean they are responsible for bullying this is beyond interpersonal childhood uprearing has been misunderstood to be dysfunctional or accuse me of not being a good student into school and prude by virtue of not being ready things don’t happen for you until someone touches you so that’s how you learn about sexuality it’s not a big deal … later is only matters based on why disrespected and made a beautiful website and had a beautiful career and it’s sometimes to treat you as though you are sheltered or not strong enough for fame making fun of you for qualifying for career modeling not based on beauty but Bc you’re fun to be around and great to see you pretend your important in spite of what you bullied by would be a good goal .. maybe not acting … this pressure on where I’m ending up in life should only matter based on in what way is me not moving forward affecting anyone from my life who would want me to move forward accuse me of living a life that can be recreated or making fun of the moments when I made nice videos and for whom accusing me of not working hard or being a starfucker … before kobe Bryant all I knew about modeling is that with Facebook app (not messed my face wasn’t hard to look at), was pushing myself to walk everyday lose weight the model after working on addressing my obesity I was huge compared to who I was fir and a much larger size than I’ve ever been in my whole life …

When who came around me gets used to judge me as guilty or not that’s what a Judge is for … in what way does living life make things occur positive or badly for others what is luck good protection a winking hand and an easy win versus what is something taken challenging that you should wonder about… I’m not worried about the future the kids are fine (so long as I’m working doing my best then the Judge can witness what solutions are we arriving to and how are things getting better). Although I was punished today made tired appear lost driving freeway I wore a bright clip to proudly say the issue I relapsed on something bright and guilty of there being something wrong with me now Bc I did cocaine and cocaine is being used as known reason for rejection or thinks not working out … I think when your mind is busy and your doing lines and someone writes a song from your neighborhood who works in town and older than you … please don’t make fun of my experiences being rejected … ultimately who was chill with you I remembered looked out for me, that was a unique experience being in a bar when another tired to fight me happened to know the bouncer (in what way would I ever be viewed as men from my life) in what way have I not been chill with men be misdiagnosed as trying to make friends to be cool be picked that’s not what being friends is about ::: it’s about being viewed as professional and that’s why I get followed by someone who I invited to a golf tournament and everyone thought that was gay.

I had briefly hung out with Aaron one night it was a night when we talked about both discontinuing having sex thought he was lying to me told me something private about his diagnosis … ultimately I was humiliated on the basis of who gave me carcinoma cancer and for my life to be questioned as dirty which a schizophenia diagnosed me as not able to care for myself dirty, making fun of my experience dating sober and treating me like I left change no the OJ story is in the news this is challenging on the basis that after what I went through now they’re going to free him, that’s treating me like I’m a joke hospitalized when he’s released like I am privies to a reaction of others … it’s I wrote the motion, I’m not a disability joke.

I’m sorry I said I’m marrying someone other than who I’ve been intimate with working on getting to know eachother again it’s taken time nothing happens overnight. If you’re a different person ..  more power to you and to those who accept you in a different states not worried about how difficult dating is or talking so don’t make fun of me being nervous dating who I’m dating,

So I got hurt on the basis that I wasn’t recognized as being beautiful or accusing me of noticing a woman in particular by face then be accused based on my study of a Orange County inmate freed be made fun of based on looking at article and taking a good picture since when is that formulae for representation … therefore if there no science to it and if I’m not a test for whether I’m not cool with with someone carry judgment or don’t mix is hurting me on basis of who is made to be compatible unread by me treating me as having people in my spaces who I can’t tell or am not changed by ultimately people take personally if you you get sick so that’s the lesson I’m dating — dressed to the nines in Gucci heels seems stupid but later when you look like a douchbag in a vest make fun of you speech or will be by what’s unattractive by you so that’s making fun of you wearing hats and misdescribing you being feminine with hats as some change discovery in a picture with a bear be accused as being masculine or cocky like you have something of value that’s not your own what made you feel inclined to wear a hat …. So this is how leaving a stable relationships being fight being hurt gets misused to illustrate how your life was ruined by one person who loved you prosecuting you to accuse you of having had experiences in life you’ve described or empowering people like that made him tough and you not you didn’t survive not successful to accuse me of doing nothing or not being professional …. Is how sharing painful fight becomes a painful lesson in how you are made to look stupid and that’s what what ended your relationship after break visiting us Supreme Court … I think exploring life isn’t being with anyone else … and shouldn’t accuse me of not being with Barack visiting scotus I am well aware of my story my memories what I have experienced in life to know how I’m belong by visiting my textbooks (whether it’s a joke about me or them) ultimately they wanted to meet me court was held in session I thought it was just a tour so that was my only rock show experience went from studying loved law school to now suffering (Bc I took notes made fun of for what my mind was like accused me of being raped before visiting scotus no that occurred after scotus when I flew back and that’s when I was hospitalized February …

Day one no one to talk to. 🩵🇺🇸

No companion zero teamwork. 

Here on my own writing with careful clear reference to terms used to make sure nothing stupid perverted is happening recognized death penalty is a the treatment of who people designate as not super your accuse you of being guy like you crown men or women (accuse you of having a dull of respect accuse you of not be respected or taken care of make fun of what life was like with friends) I supported friends through their own struggles why would I ever pretend to be a woman I’m not and think that being beautiful is about face or act like I know what love is or improvement let’s not learn the hard way so in an effort to accuse me spreading schizophrenia it’s to treat me as needing to say something to highlight a memory from rehab (making fun of me or recognizing a blue bird) making fun of a woman who I stayed away from and didn’t speak to on the basis of self harm (later bc she hanged her night dress) wasn’t insulting to me personally on the basis that I have outfits so this is using that story to describe me as being nude on a website before rehab accusing me of being gay or called pervert housed with a woman not my choice.

Will probably work on feeling better tomorrow today I concentrated on everything wrong challenging to not get wrong with others and this is to illustrate that ER is not a joke pretending to have worked hard or in my mind things are too much … ultimately what can be solved will be based on what the Judge thinks and if I’m lucky get to share my analysis based on my experiences bullying and illustrate how my story or assembly of facts to allude to self is not an Allison middle name fear of being doomed as far as I’m commented if you’re bad you’re going to suffer and die and be punished ….therefore Bc people were more concerned about about in what way is my diagnosis mean I get things wrong or people wrong … is mistaking my confidence as thinks wants me that’s having seen me nice then treating me like I think I’m hot or didn’t work hard anorexic running battling body dysmorphia … please don’t call me pervert like I would notice another woman’s body and have a body that I don’t like after seeing me achieve a different body type was unique not fasting running as you can see 130 lbs and no shape is a joke about “who was treated as grose” it’s I was punished for getting sick by not being responded to (was what was shared) so that become a reaction or skill that you get treated for when someone reaches out to you and offers you a ride home and told no and rehab director is considered a bad idea listen mom I’m chill no one is trying to have sex with me no one has accidentally hurt me I was dating nice men didn’t meet, not preferred was men I loved willing to cohabitate that will never be found again like ___ moved back to Texas whatever the voices jokes is to treat you like you separate people from who they love based on your awareness to not mistreat based on who talk to reject the others then treat me as talking different, it’s whatever I recognized and loved for … wasn’t kept Bc I keep getting voices,

Paris Hilton ruined her book to mention a rat with balls running up her driveway actually I stayed on the side of my house for as long as I didn’t feel well and there was a rat that would run by and $hit where my chair was please don’t make fun of my short experience recording nature or bugs whatever you keep a record of will be important to you one day maybe not to who’s watching thinking you are creating likeable content as though you are privileged special more so than others is why anyone would experiment with their peace being protected and with risk of disturbing your peace on the basis of prosecuting you as not forewarning to stop so bullying by family (is deserved if you’re at fault) if you break your sisters car window is why she steals your cat and got protected windows so that’s how I responded scared. I forget if I told her that I broke her window, anyways my car was taken and got in trouble which teaches you why you are given voices made to question who is smart and constantly treated like you care or concerned over who is doing well … it’s not a system I’m competing with if it’s about going to law school and not subjecting my family to harm including inquiry as to their choices or who’s made fun of …. I think ultimately when I get in trouble lose respect it’s to test to see what I’m successful by how much to have gone wrong how challenging is life until I cheer up and what will be enough to explain why being ignored given a hard time … again in court “it is what it is” ultimately we know who I am and you know who he is so the judge knows who she is, once you are tested for empowerment or whether people feel stupid by you making fun of how you were loving … one day there will be no recipe for love anyone can follow share like you’ve figured him out he figured me out and you punished me like love or sexuality is about sex looks or being an attorney … love is about things being good with the other (and that’s what takes 3 years of improving for). So if that’s the standard then start improving beginning for a Judge … then work on who is motivated ending up anywhere successful for who or deserved by what.

You should be proud of women are so smart put together that they’re winning their lawsuits against President Trump, it’s a great story about independent women who survive things struggle and for anyone to think nude jokes is my mind being drawn to her line of work I’ve not performed accuse me of being curious about other women … I’m focused on myself ask anyone in a room I have presence maybe that’s a survival skill in a room where I’m dressed up late called police before I crashed means I need back up gps if I can’t drive anywhere I don’t know the freeways could get lost that shows how sure my I was 2013 traveling drove alone to Palo Alto those are memories of when you were strong able … I think bc punished was to say I can’t travel and put in jail was to make fun of me or my experiences in life – the police I repeat have nothing to do with anyone you know … I repeat in the event that family thinks you’re gone on meds (do your best to show you’re of value not a pill head sick on purpose) then that will be a fight you get made fun of for …. When Dad mentions <the normal button> that’s highlighting something my dad said to accuse me of something wrong with me titled as (though I’ve learned anything from my Dad) I lived away from my family studied and until the day my Dad died I kept my life suffering or bullied separate from them … missing dinners stayed in my room … how much improvement does it require to be positive with Dad again … would be to address a loss on a street leaving your car in front of one medical for your experience before rehab be made fun of as though you would witness things not reported it to police that’s being accused as taking it seriously that you’re self harming making you seem like you have a path or guided to make decisions (it’s whatever recommended at one point) life is completely different bullied so hospital was laughable beard laughter and later rehab seemed like a joke … no disability is a joke you are never anywhere to experience life automatically improve feel good upon leaving dad to be proud you stopped taking adderall …

The Judge’s presence was confident to know that there will be solution found if I can meet her expectations follow a rule  improve (I had no idea who my Judge was). But I dressed like how I’m treated I actually love politics Instagram and coming from my story was special —- how quickly you can be dismantled treated as dirty or guilty it’s sad how people feel about who’s fault is what and since when is liability on people who speak to you ,,,, if you’re attacking me and no one is attacking you rare instance I was punished (modeling appearing well) is how worse is shown it’s by you being comfortable and based on that being quality about you taking good photos it just fueled photography shaming (pride in a good photo) at what point is sexuality about how you look, when people want to see you by chat or photo (it’s never a good idea) to risk being watched and get hurt …. So that’s not talking about your partners sexuality health or changes managing your life and living a good life that they shouldn’t be subjected to not shining is why I was made to appear obese and face changed accuse of not being supportive of who I love by physical changes …. Ultimately these are phases in life (as a public figure) you learn that sometimes what can’t be said is communicated to all as being the problem (so if it’s whether I cared or didn’t care enough) it’s not me sick by who I loved (concerned like that’s a pattern) that’s recognition of a crime in his neighborhood and him going through changes he didn’t want me to work, so you won’t know where you belong or where you will do well leaving something you’re good at to work show that you know how to earn money … and whether that’s a way forward for you or not needing to focus on finals … later becomes a fishy question about your resume short term (I had over 200 hours community service law clerk couldn’t applied for an award at cal state bar) so that was working hard and later not being able to work and attend law school. I’ve noticed that where I belong or do well at people won’t understand why I’m still in law school layer by age 38 you learn that how you talk about life is what people think of so speak to your passions in life and don’t let any change in course be a lesson over what’s important or of issue. It seems like a later membership to Brady made me seem like I had an understanding other than being disabled myself or suffering of what causes you speak inappropriately … 12 steps in to write in private given my experience with 4 th step and being made to feel bad about myself it makes no sense why later in life I would be able to date or expected like it’s not something people would want to know about me. Ultimately after becoming famous people want to know (why would people hook up with you and question your value based on diagnosis. So when your brain is ruined and you’re made to feel small it’s making fun of who you are as a person accuse you of being feminine online or making up a personality unreal not you (is how u was treated diagnosed permanent disability) if I’m writing to help others as a woman and if you’ve read my resume at what point do I appear to be anywhere in life because of what jobs I’ve had or helped … life becomes strategy once you can’t get a job and it’s a Shlep to apply and meet standards … so that’s doing well in blogging and punished as schizophrenic mistreated like you hurt women or are gay and molest people accuse your personality as being sexually inviting or pretending to be pure and (creating a base or person for blame for sickness) it’s when you are not recognized as being a good friend people experiment question changes or lack of asserted feminity as something being perverted about you or secret wrong with you (in the end the meds affect how you look sound and what people think of you, and if day meds are to be smart and if smart is not the problem it’s accusing you of being different personality type or advising you of lying or using meds to perform

Explain why the police forgave you relapsing you and how you got them to follow you walking (if you did drugs you’re then guilty of something so it was important once I’ve done something wrong have a guilt or secret that makes me look bad for police to check on me).

Free Trump on basis I was mistaken for fake princess treated as pervert punished for modeling and not making friends easily with women … and if he is an actual wealthy politician being accused of having sex with women who are now suing him for damages (I’ve not made any arguments about how hook ups get paid and haven’t lived long enough to know why Trump is being charged) and as far as I’m concerned I’m being faced with a similar positive lesson that when you seem concerned about your reputation and consider another being recognized for having had an intimate experience with someone who is now President (no one recognizes her to be talking about sex) or accuse me of being picky over leadership it’s not fun to be made fun of when I was once helpful and it not being about gay her story stood out on the basis of the attorney she picked and he was punished (of anyone is steadfast on prosecuting anyone in power admired of rape) is why later he lawsuit is still recognized but highlighted for a less controversial charge is a serious offense for a woman previous to sue, it’s not about making fun of people as characters to set up trap put in jail mistreat, she’s still in court on the basis that she struggled and her truth is important to illustrate that his attorney was home arrested it’s not a trendy concept “hush concept” love made known is not making it trendy to love anyone who’s a DA, again my mistake for making the effort — so it’s not about who shined who was who ultimately it’s about who’s in power a politician and it’s better to be faced with what you’ve done wrong … not defending him is managing my own crisis (is a hard lesson on feeling apart of, you won’t know what “creative arts game energy life teams are about” if you sound caught up in stupid stuff if that’s the quickest way to being rejected it’s not about who’s who. Ultimately I am who I am I shared my story I made the effort I should not be punished and things should not go haywire for him, as someone I love (and of people don’t see the value in love) I can try today to accept agreement with the judge. Get well and then think about why a steady relationship was blamed …

Court let me care about everything … goal is to improve (short window to respectfully and in an orderly way discuss things unclear made clear on the basis to offer hope (to illustrate that it’s not who things are about in harms way) it’s when you forget to mention what you think is difficult and simply let people be proud of who they are the less power you give away to others to dictate or punish or worry why you are changed ultimately if someone is improving that’s a blessing (it’s unclear how I was made to look undeserving of who loved me picked me). Settling down is not the mistake. Getting sick after doing well I guess normal struggle after rehab (not a strong student not feeling good about yourself) everyone who’s positive toward you is a good memory … being alone and being positive and having no one maybe is why people reached out to you. In the end what you’re capable of would do well in if it was blogging thought I could do a paid job writing wasn’t viewed as helping me since I was doing well writing, not doing well doesn’t mean I’m too late or working on a project that is failing or need to experience failure to know when to quit or why it was recommended against … whatever my life is it is this way how I’m coping … maybe without therapist and pen pal now … but I’m sure the recovery time is the same (being in court) is a serious experience in life it’s not a joke about where you are or stay in life and why since you were punished once you are many years later taken through court for a year to be treated as though that solves what’s gone wrong … if being successful writer or published well known was viewed as too much or not believed life coach then this is how I’m being put to the test in what way is music hurt as made to recognize anything to cause them to give up without explanation warning … please don’t make fun of how I help or who blocked me @EllenDeGeneres she wore blue pants means although I was working not shocked by her losses … that wasn’t a joke or a consequence or something being so wrong with me or doing well anything suddenly changed in anyone made them give up. (Today we learned what’s not said becomes the torment bullying self harm making fun of you or you’re awareness for being chased when little hitting my head into the tile – sensitive story about who I am as a person didn’t handle bullying well).

Hospital is not a place you throw people when you’re done with them, I think based whatever I’ve been through if you portray yourself as a whore (as a long system fe runner, making fun of yourself hitting head into a wall 2016, the later 2018 making fun of yourself as someone who is loved thrown into a walk is making light of what happened to my head it’s not glamourizing sex or “being done” is not a joke (in the end … the less you make things about life – leave others unaffected) maybe later they’ll appreciate you for being strong and like all women can come to accept one another as although proper or sheltered each woman endures crazy things in life … everyone gets treated as stupid … I think we are somewhat clear on what rape is … and unlike the past without apps and concern for faces …. My face matters as to what about sex. #santamonica running.

I’m a Weho womens meeting with straight women local (why I shop at Abercrombie it’s the only place I need to appear well in life). Just wasn’t attending. I was doing so well that a woman who embraced a more masculine look was wearing a hat I think it was yellow, and thinking to myself ok good the theme is still helpful there’s still hope and support for other ways to highlight support. In a meeting of women I would be one of the stronger people there on the basis of staying well not being high and that’s to the benefit of a meeting when people are inspired by recovery … I’ve never joked about life strength weakening being stronger has never been my issue until faced with schizophrenia … damage that’s permanent would be if anyone was offended or changes by me affected by my blood type genetics presence … I stopped engaging online … work through voices then rethink whether to perform online right now …. Im more concerned with people complaining and Im already in court so I can’t afford to be questioned as someone who made a blog targeting mental health people like I went through anything in life common easy or not having experienced solution.

Who’s not successful confident and a woman since when of all people am I being mistreated as gay or gay incentive or changing women in a way that causes them sickness or mental illness (since when is sexuality a joke) or gay a club (when considering people’s health). Ultimately schizophenia is not what West Hollywood needs having survived AIDS and multiple epidemics and no lesbian clubs or bars exist which would mean if it’s not my path in life and wanted love from a man I will not find love elsewhere not on the basis of what I seem like to women the guy or feminine doesn’t entitle anyone to act like they know about life or what men are about … ultimately who disrespects you becomes your problem to reinforce and correct —- that’s a lesson on who’s strong and why I’m not strong (so it’s ok therapy stopped) forgot as a woman online made fun of that who I am empower people to liven up see myself as apart of and forget whatever lesser life or face change they sought to accuse me of having something inappropriate about me in response to a woman seated next to me I was drinking … obviously made friends better with a guy … so that’s being treated as pervert when you’re hot it’s so hot sees you doesn’t know what happened to you to make fun of you “being in need” making fun of my definition of pervert (calling it schizophrenia later in life take off day meds), and it’s to prove what about acceptance … no one can help you if you blog and there’s crime and you’re working had few delays on time to work (that’s not hospital my bottom) dating is not my bottom, being old enough to try dating older now that I know to be careful of what I look like and him too, shahs suddenly not cool about me … is the connected pride (in you’re gonna do good work and no one will be shamed for being famous or any career type) and I was going to be the one person who could’ve been retained as as an aide and instead exposed as a “sell out” whats not cool about you lesson (what you cannot control done to you) is when scared about people being upset no reason and concerned about family living disciplined life running at night … in what way does subjecting me to being hurt let someone accidentally believe I’m an offender and use my body type to characterize what an offenders body looks like is so demeaning to be criticized as used up or made fun of when I get picked (no woman is rejected Bc of me accepted) therefore my identity is not running counter to any woman’s recognition of their beauty.

I get picked and created a look that flatters me people noticed without looking as perfect feminine as others accepted in my stages that was brave of me to share not knowing how to get a good face day building acceptance for it.

One day someone will write a book about women and friendship and how I recognized theme of importance to my Mothers story … was later used to mistreat me like what my Mom went through was “paraia” seems like no one lived through the 90s and wasn’t included in being heard … so I wouldn’t understand why I’m told I’m something to not speak as though I’m inappropriate … so let’s get down to what is a paraia (OJ) and who is not a paraia (ME) therefore what’s not funny (USC) don’t retire Leslie my only special football experience … sometimes based on what others think needs to happen to (figure out what’s wrong with everyone is a dangerous psychiatry experiment convincing me I’m sick for the sake of specific types of people to improve) so when mental health is used to judge you physical health look demeanor as a short shoes service joke it’s mistreating you as being asked to leave or not belonging disruptive …

One day someone will write about schizophrenia and why services were expanded to individuals in life and explain how we’re they made to feel better without excluding me from being publicly identified subject of a term that no one else has been called forget me suffering with no explanation of “what’s too much” made to think less …

It takes 10 years of writing to prove you’re smart enough that people from other countries read your work that takes years to provide anything of quality which means it’s helpful interesting to others struggling to help everyone … in the end I was not allowed to be recognized as smart based on how I’m feeling or who my friends are … having friends can help prevent voices … unfortunately a problem continues without knowing how to defend myself or figure out what about me was I being punished for … who’s not in my life … or for not knowing how voices are caused …

Please don’t make the war in Russia about making fun of my drawing 2014 or scary experience (I was never anyone so figured out or not working in support of politicians that anyone with money would be threatened by me) being scared isn’t a game of survival that makes you street smart or tough — I think I recorded it Bc I was able to run away scared and called police to report to them who scared me, so that’s a lesson on how fragile you are as a person … in the end you’re hurt (so next time explain that to who I love and that’s how you get treated as stupid) … so if she’s winning lawsuits please don’t interrogate a person capable of bringing suit in court of illustrating a like stated fact about my drawing “Micah” to make fun of back zipper ANGL pants or cocaine like I’m easy stupid no it’s one time “asked can I put a finger in” and told him no I have a boyfriend. Then I was mistreated as cheating or dirty like Micah gave me HPV Carcinoma Cancer.

Stop the war in Ukraine I drank vodka, I’m 1/4 Russian, and relapsed almost lost my smarts reacting poorly saying stupid things with new friends … means … GERMANY has found faith in the necessity for something cooler to happen to avoid explaining Russia by making fun of my story and accusing my Ex Boss of not being Pulitzer idea worthy connection of or wasn’t a goal of mine why would I be shocked by her effort to create work Pulitzer recognized. Destruction isn’t power it’s permanent losses due to lost goals and out of control fighting (it makes no sense to me why trained soldiers would attack eachother) and then use me as though I’m unaffected or unsupportive … if I fight China that’s condemning supporting Russia (and if I refriend the g20 summit rejectee who publicly met with Barack Obama twice when he wasn’t confident means that) who’s recognition of rejection and not viewing that to be a big deal means … that Instagram photo of world leaders looking at me (actual meme) either you care moved by people caring concerned by devastation or you are someone improved that has recognized and maybe needs to recognize again and start listing all the major difficulties and things gone well in spite of … and not be used as a poor example of not providing solution accuse me being complicated thinking face is about genetics or money or meds … if you don’t trust my heart then that’s why I stopped performing online (pervert prevention sex gender identity prevention). — If there are things to talk about challenging NOW IS THE TIME on the basis that there was a shooting in Carson, so if kids are becoming victims to gun violence —- maybe instead of focusing on rejection and how an offender is made maybe start thinking about things that have been fought argued by adults who have struggled and make sure nothing difficult is left with the kids to fight about (sounds like I know my place without having to cause or create for disturbance in self or others) sounds like that was a fun fact about my childhood later tormented … court sees me improving … lucky to be alive (so that’s discussing difficulty since 9:00am on my way to court lost since addressing personal challenge making an effort to help the radio who is unclear of what court is about (I didn’t know what it was about or what I could talk about until I showed up) luckily I didn’t appear as described by others.

She said “she doesn’t see a mental health issue present today.” #proper just barely made it after being social … be viewed poorly … (I’m sorry if court can’t provide the solution sought or punishing me for) … I was honest giving and loving … a shared solution based ok the radio would be … to have a good day and start writing about things that let us have fun be positive think tough and not be sick to stuff you couldn’t battle successfully no one is shaming me (it’s the court was positive toward me) so I need to figure out why I’m hurt and why I’m putting all this effort into figuring out what’s wrong and nothings changed about me. Being conservative serious this is court this is my life’s work these are my memories these are my words and ways I’ve cared therefore even losing him will not prevent me from having things to do to improve and try to help … so this a period of figuring what’s wrong on my own without nurturing support of love no pictures no public video making selfies sexy selfie … show up to court should’ve taken a picture on my way there neat lost after an hour of course broken …  (this is the controversy?)

Based on my card inability to break with a car in front of me far enough away that breaks shouldn’t worked Bc I was able to turn the wheel not hit the car in front of me stopped at the light … is when life gets hard and things don’t work out and things get complicated and otherwise easy trip is made difficult by not knowing by memory which exit so driving lost for an hour and can’t be late to court asked to be seen shows how important it is for me to be there let’s me know that things can come up in life that make it difficult to get places in life or make a good impression … you can be in a rush that doesn’t mean you’ll figure out how to exit any better than previous times and get used to being lost on the freeway which hasn’t happened to me since being taken to Del Amo hospital and using a European GPS and ending up lost and driving past a hospital I have no idea where it exists …

I think schizophrenia is either you lose chance to be normal (hospitalization improving self harm) gave someone permission to declare you to have permanent illness by self harm. I’m gonna work on being alone for a year (suffer alone nothings going right everything’s worse bad day today). Lucky I got to attend court. So if things are getting better (first day of mental health issues gps phone delay) and whatever happens to me is because of what I think my choice my feelings what I decide to focus on (maybe being alone will remind me of everything I can be if I don’t get hurt and stay single friends with everyone make clear – so no one thinks my future will occur by connection (I am either well can make effort talk about blog or nothing nobody not well).

That’s a new privilege … to accept that others are hurting or things can be made better focusing on what’s wrong with me until things get better (and that’s bogs joke to expose me like everything should work or won’t work or makes sense connected) life’s not a game so while love is a fun experience that’s nice to share is why I lost everything. It’s court being ok with me, thinking I’m worse not during making fun of my bad luck hardships losses as joke or characteristic of anything ever before. My life has never been over and put together so many times in a few years and destroyed more than the amount of times to figure out voices jealousy strength stalking identity bullying inner circles help good omen bullying looking bad not selected protected supported (and rejected in public is worst experience in life it means you’re not celebrated it doesn’t excuse any moment something wrong and everyone’s ignoring you not helping you is not a joke or unknown system of building strength … wow that’s how you’re connected to people who you feel sick by on the basis that they’re improved standing support is that thrive done their part considered honored helpful and while you are left to explain solve fox your life I complained once why dropped beyond that I did my best to move on (life has never been an all on board not on board issue with me) I’m not OJ so don’t make fun of my memory what I was told about a victims family (while you’re making fun of loose conversation) ultimately I committed suicide just wanting to talk about life so don’t act it’s easy to have questions or feel sick or “threatened by bullying online attorney in valley” stop accusing my story as made up or act like anything is happening to my story told that’s not how god works or weather or war (if I’m not in jail now) I don’t have a big head making things up or struggling weigh pathetic issues or not strong or feeling insulted by whoever’s issue with me is about what if it’s about where I grew up or being close to the Simpson family (then move to another country and tell GERMANY what’s not chill about Leslie traveling and making friends at a bar).

So as consequence for sounding like being brave mentally ill to address crime and that crime shouldn’t occur on any basis and of because of my Instagram ultimately the code of things being right about life … will keep you strong …. If I could travel everywhere strong enough I’d study more write research papers and be someone else other than a trashed person wannabe soldier making fun of who I am or when or why … I didn’t address a change (insult by definition of soldier) accuse me of being soldier guy like to change my motivations for running change my story (on Vyvanse) … self harm is about called something you’re not. What hurts most is just being alone and accused of liking other people when you love them … ultimately it’s not what we learned it’s about who’s stronger now being separate from me means that I make the right choice … allow me Course wedding dresses at anthropologie (right now my dream is for life to not get worse, and of it can be prevented we are allowed to talk until things get better).

As someone sober it’s not that I’m older you become privileged to feel like you’re in control but not… and your lovers who drink (glad they’re strong) and not stuck talking about mental health bullying a voices mean names sex issues (did I not March I’m blue sweatpants recognizing that Jonah attended my meeting) being a good person is what makes me respected not so someone I love relives a similar trauma (or made reference to) who you love is not your Jonah (and that is disrespectful to a woman writing to someone she loves) … let’s recognize that beautiful things about life are either celebrated or memorialized as being a public offense (no matter what your story looks like or who you are) … in the end either you are someone figuring out life and cares or some lost drug addict accuse you of being some song code nerd who didn’t share what the morning of 9/11 was like (my Father crying) so why was I criticized as traitor Bc you misunderstood Homer Simpson cartoon mention to be about me thinking my Dad does nothing works at a station … why don’t I have money (None of your business in what way Parents fight with Daughters and that was my only experience asking about money (choked) like Bart Simpson) maybe circa sibling in New York living fancy lives upset me why is he given so much confidence power (explained that’s his son to leave him alone).

Those are my memorable moments. If I’m rejected and she’s been in my car in what way am I being told something to make me feel stupid …. To be an adult there will be many people that come into your life and men grow up and experience life while I am lucky (was at least a girlfriend they remembered speak to still). Monogamy is only talking to one.

I made one good comment being applied to my separation what does worse mean (I said worse get well if not sure it’d worse can help figure out why things are worse) I think I can overcome Court being okay with me figuring out what’s wrong I’m sorry if I lost in arguments or managing my health and others feelings at any point … in the end the lesson is “you will wish to be at peace and social & feel good” and learn that war is not a joke (so that’s not always the solution) …. I’m not the bully fake soldier … give me time to have the confidence to put things in stone if unclear … if prevention means don’t attack who and why and if you think my influence gets attacked (it’s voices justification) ultimately I give up on voices … if I’m not bothered by our don’t have to talk about it and forget whatever challenge that created. Judge is okay by me that doesn’t mean elsewhere can be whatever I did my best …. My life couldn’t be better and I couldn’t have lost more hard earned peaceful time … over memes … I’m not missing the issue it’s not respecting my sexuality (femininity strength) so that’s being diagnosed schizophrenia what’s the lesson or taught me was what it looks like a feels like to be bullied and not able to get a job …. You learn when stupid you get tested … it’s how you learn that support isn’t what you need what you need is for who you love to be well … ultimately life’s a cheating mom daughter third face joke …. And maybe for most women cheating isn’t something you worry about it happens when they move on (that’s your first lesson on being less than).

Love is not something mentally ill controlling you or telling you how to feel or what to think. I’ve recognized that with or without adderrall life can be hard a lot of work to figure out you can be hurt too late thoughtful or in hardship since when have I ever acted like writing letters or speaking is easy (maybe why I’m hurt called schizophenic) ultimately Court can decide whether I should suffer am mentally ill or not doing my best (when your life is over) … I did my best it’s too much …  I lost everything (had a challenging day) unwanted phone issue treating me like a racist joke recalling life treating me like things taking too long is a punishment of people known to not be respected having worked been through a lot accuse me of trying to be important for money or for an easier life (so this is making a hard life for me) based on not appreciate my arguments and accusing my health as being about anyone else as far as I’m concerned where you don’t belong don’t go back lesson learned saves you time wondering and not let your issues be about them …. My feelings were hurt when I was made to be paranoid accuse me of being delusional (inner circle supported) hurt me like I worried about him around other women (that’s a good sign) it’s not about you until you drink and think to sue who you went out of your way to friend and she reads Instagram and you’re out here suffering arguing the last 20 years of your life or entire life like it’s a joke of loving myself or learning more about myself – I have already been proud for good grades jobs loved screamed at punished I’m just happy when they’re not mad anymore (what system is lucky or about money) no one who loved me supports blog if it’s complicated for me and no relationship works on the basis of being accused of being something else loving them, those were the best years of my life.

I’m sorry I mentioned @GovAbbott in court (in AA I learned to take responsibility for others) therefore busing immigrants to California isn’t intended to send crime to OC therefore if someone I love is shipped immigrants the commit crimes (then that should be mentioned since I’m the one who is taking it upon myself to figure out a school shooting by analyzing my own life and data and what work I completed and what was stated “failed negotiation” as we’ve mentioned what you’re made to remember about it if you’re trying to help don’t let it happen again (I’m glad the courts have allowed me to care) I’m glad I’m not suicidal or mentally ill— what is risk? How do you know when risk exists? How do you know when a crime occurs and how are you supposed to know what about or what is prompting anyone to react or respond poorly (making fun of my mention of Chicago lightfoot and court appearance accuse me of being confident) I’m not a DA or investigator or detective I’m not a licensed attorney psychotherapist interpreter I’ve not communicated with Chicago (and this is to illustrate a risk that what seems influenced by @mymollydoll1985 accusing me of posting garbage communicates on wrong team accuse of me being being stupid getting hemangioma during George Floyd … you are special when who is from your life is recognized as being apart of a good life no one can tell you what life is about rap street code tough the it factor (being a blogger single living at home recently failing in life) improving I forgot when I saw George anything about my life was being used to make a fact that George Floyd was anything related to me or accuse a name being made with any facts from my story is to either say my story is known not told (teach me people change names and represent what makes them feel like faith is in better things to come) accuse me of not reacting to guys death criticize me as not recognizing myself to be code of it was my argument (photo pill tongue) I saw recall what I saw recorded of him (diagnosis later change making fun of me) like I wasn’t dead serious during riots a blogger and outdoor runner everyday at what point do you stop thinking peoples stories or lives make them important eventually if it’s a game seems easy or made fun of … then start focusing on what’s challenging (that’s avoiding issues) … it’s not a rule to be at peace means to not be scared and it’s not a stated solution to mention to prevent and it’s not been written what’s based on who and in what way did I not sue the cop who assaulted George Floyd for wearing a tie to communicate something Skylar I felt offended by (the entire country is in motion responding) and please don’t act like you know what things are about … how offenders – or talking to police instead of viewing me as helpful accuse me of being cool with or act like that’s normal …. And don’t hurt me based on past 3 years ….

Wait until you have your problems sorted. So that was upcoming (I’m losing with in terms of keeping up with insults or what I’ve sad people unhappy with me) so you can’t take back what you think of life or how you try to process hurt (with no one talking to you) so maybe that equals voices or a think tank or support group minus you real or not real CIA or tech or presidential or people you know you people you don’t know who study you ultimately mental illness breaks you down (and I can’t explain what that would do for someone else in life for me to change or get sick) if I self harm I lost my recovery time without self harm – who can explain loving yourself being visual auditioning to self harm with an ugly face (you know whatever you look like upset and whatever is inside of you however created) ultimately it’s who you’re not making fun of me like I’m haunted harbor something other than me accuse me of having “alters” making fun of my love life and failures you don’t know what love is and value … go ahead call my Instagram schizophenia don’t use my data and photos to create a term “alters” making fun of my inability to get married and get to experience the social pride of adulthood success with family friends … keeping photos now has become a way of making fun of me so things don’t happen you know I don’t think anything will happen for me I’m sorry if you think I’m fake or don’t value me then take everything and all my boyfriends and friends. And be with nothing and stop taking photos … when I give up is not an ER joke and court didn’t tell me I was sick or mentally ill… a worse life is no one’s business (I think court today established that … caring – maybe I won’t be popular and people will think I’m mentally ill or a wannabe law student or attorney politician but at least I care and concerned about preventing. Ask Americana building last time Leslie cared how long did it take for things to improve … that’s a good lesson on support everyone will always be supported whether you recognize that I’m working appreciative well spoken … or lose a 3 year relationship and messenger records (1) NOTICE caring is not a theme and just like I avoid hospital on the basis of self harm resulting in rehab worse diagnosis (if I’m aware of something message and something goes wrong) no one teaches you to message that’s not how you determine what’s wrong so I’m sorry if not famous (was made to say me not doing well results in retaliation against me or celebrated act). Trying to help doesn’t mean you know what others are about the issues or your odds it means I don’t feel well why am I not allowed to comment nothing should happen (celebrated down up or rehab loss) to restate a fear (accusing me of messing up or being attacked) … so if you think I went on a journey deleted emails accusing me of being connected to people of harm to make fun of my safety needs reactions compare me to Hillary is to address again accuse me of being special or disappointing privileged pr take away privilege destruction of property is making fun of figuring out how to share what I’m going through in life in private in email (whether on twitter or not if that’s the allegation then that’s what’s thought) you can’t change what people think …. And if people think that bad things happen accuse you having any kind of history of failed negotiations then please address Justice Ginsberg’s flicking off the camera (whether Imreminded of something helped or confused2be offensive) it wasme that talked about running writing (please don’t misinterpret cancer2be a known condition occurring in professionals who meet me accuseme of having a condition difficult that they lose their battle w/cancer). I never said life was aboutme I only illustrated that I recognize life is about how special her life is … I think insult and (misinformation privilege assumption) is occurring when u think people are closer than they are or hopeful or not positive on some basis your accusing me of

In reality relationships don’t work texting catching up if it’s a lot don’t explain what’s wrong with you you’re goal is to be a chill confident person not insecure and value others, being sick and looking stupid hurts men of value who can relate that they liked you but focused on themselves so they know what it’s like to meet me like me and for me to realize on my own get a job (don’t make fun of women who date or wait to date that’s not funny or voices) I lost every match be yourself accepting of. & just lost Rob, to looking stupid and a group email (overcome bullying voices) it’s not very attractive and embarrassing for someone you like to get bullied go through face changes mental illness.

A secret: happens 

Tell a story: that person gets sick again

What you don’t mention: occurring 

Not winning w/women: hurts difficult 

Being known I’m common: shared wellness apart of getting sick hurts OC

Whatever you are you are I’m sorry for not describing court at this point people get hurt so I’m focusing on what’s causing sickness unhappiness (maybe focus on how I failed and why I’m hurt now and can’t talk to someone I loved). First separation #age38. Work alone.

Called him “my boy” on Facebook not online (I’m a nobody now amongst friends) positive highlight matched (it’s I was the up and coming public figure who’s story he respected saw beauty in me disfigured that’s not revenge dating hyper sexuality or cheating on Todd (so definition of schizophenia makes fun of selfies being cute looking young) I wasn’t adulting him or experienced in (alternative sex options) – Bc I got picked and that was shocking I learned although I may not be cool and respect who he loves … ultimately what makes you cool makes you lucky and if you feel bad or look bad that’s when you were special although women liked by married men are shamed (I’m actually chubby and don’t date so had I known he was married is not what attracts you) it’s who’s interested (how you meet people how older match happens). Please don’t investigate my past year with an ex it’s going fine … no life is perfect … overcome this lawsuit accept what’s not cool about me and be lucky he was into me when I was rejected repeatedly at my house (and brought flowers to his house and didn’t shake his hand stood far away), some kind of misunderstanding I FELT COOL WITH HIM BEING SOCIAL he was being social Bc I was young he’s conservative.

There’s no reason for sickness or bipolar or mental health 2009 v 2011 v 2013 — I guess the key theme is failure and not feeling well, argument, fighting, complaining, asserting yourself, being bullied, losing friends, looking stupid, getting jealous focusing on law school and then not finishing losing everything again (there’s no pattern to wellness) I’m sorry if anyone’s confused by my health and disclosures or thinks I make things seem easy or not respectful protective which is probably why I shown nude online called schizophenic it’s making fun of what I recall why I can’t go to IOP aa or rehab on the basis of privacy (if you don’t think I don’t respect see their struggle) then you’re sorely mistaken as seeing me as pretending to be anywhere in life or think sexuality is a lie you carry defective should know of, if you’ve always liked men (it’s Bc of the rehab chatter I walked away from brought up sex offenders in prison get it the worse) and walked away (sued) so that’s what gets capitalized on how you describe life and you’re not memorialized and they are to treat you like you didn’t go out of your way to make them feel special take risk too and didn’t embarrass them or speak poorly of them or let them be vulnerable or watched or look bad.

I’m allowed to talk about challenging subjects with risk to me and my health that the court is not punishing me for (which hurts to hear I’m not mentally ill) and means to be careful I don’t get sick or sick people don’t mix things up or accuse my writing of being sick or teaching anyone anything sick accuse myself of being possessed or accuse my writing as transformative (as far as I’m concerned I went to school to write and admired writing courses teach novel writing) it’s whatever skill I haven’t learn or accused of not demonstrating becomes something I’m made fun of for (how things look on the outside seeming stupid is Bc of something you have said that sounds stupid that makes you look like you dont recognize that you sound stupid or disqualifying your viewpoint on the basis of saying your statement is not true … at age 38 maybe that’s not how you are hurt but later think about whether that matters (question who helps you) it’s you that make yourself look stupid not who helps you that hurts you and sometimes that can cause you paranoia (why would I get sick applying to law school). Seems like personal statement and explaining cocaine was on deans list rehab was too difficult (because I recovered) ultimately bringing up a Sydney comment “what adversity” living in West Hollywood (is a good sign to think about a challenge you overcame even if it was a setback or failure).

There’s no such thing as being bitched once you work rush to family dinner and hit your head on the lamp several times that’s you’re only story of working hard and clumsy overheard my conversations (today ended positively even though my phone is giving me a hard time my gps didn’t work so I was lost for an hour panicking driving 100 miles an hour driving the same route over and over again Bc I missed an exit breaking up the radio stiffness disclosing something tough I’m faced with in the event anyone in my family gets sick (figure out why). I called 911 told them I’m lost my phone doesn’t work (Bc I shared one comment relevant to molestation as a Neverland guest) and crashed my car stressed out and lost, have to appear I’m court it was important I be there not mess up it’s rare to be allowed to talk and get to talk to a DA and Judge, so that’s privilege it doesn’t mean court is for fun so when the Judge says you cannot talk to him and I reply okay, that means because I spoke tried participate I responded even with an attorney … so that’s losing everything. (To highlight I’m sorry I shared my brothers adderrall story childhood) firefighters … and he got sick as an adult Bc I shared that …. crashing my car and my tire flat happened (Bc my breaks didn’t work), so I called the police they didn’t show up, couldn’t tow my car, a Good Samaritan helped me and thankfully my car was messed up but the car in front of me was okay. The story at Neverland I didn’t share was getting in a car accident listening to music in a Lincoln mini golf cart. So today was an example of mentally I’ll under stress doing my best to figure out why I have schizophrenia and not taking selfie before driving and gos not working ending up lost by stadium and then after being lost 1 hr crashed my car, which result matches a story not shared … so how does a bad day happen and nothing goes right for you? (1) I don’t know there’s no formula for it so based on court today although they were positive maybe it’s Bc my life is hard and I lost my pen pal, and never got to work for him and instead made to feel left out … in the end it’s my job to get well (the more you harp on my reactions to women) the more uncomfortable things are and the less anything is about you …. Due to “not to talk to” I’m aware that Bc I loved Todd and lost everything & 3 years worth of effort learning and getting to know another and myself … I can accept my loss and lesson is not to date again and be close to anyone …. and write to the courts until I don’t have any more challenges (the in between phase in life or isolation bullying worse than reality) isn’t necessary to appreciate being around people … so don’t let yourself get destroyed by voices …

Suicide isn’t genetic. Ask Star Magazine. And Chicago, my 2013 book isn’t a joke. And the character “Anne Frank” or movie Little Princess not relevant to the times, therefore if Chicago is shocked by a homicide on a popular doctor in the community who bought a house. What was remembered is that “he didn’t feel safe.” Based on my disclosure outside the ER referencing a new album its possible to argue @mymollydoll1985 inspired him to buy a home on top of a hill based on criticizing me as though I (1) recognized he was the maker of solution following (2) with a job with govt recognized I would be making the reverse (I’ve been alone 2004-2017) so it’s not me scared or not having been toughened up by experiences in life (I’m not famous so it’s considered joke) what’s most important is to recognize who is famous and if read into which doctor in Chicago also found solution in recognizing that although Michael Moore (may be atop a hill in a house – Edward Scissorhands) that’s a compliment recording my life tracking my progress and learning how to record life make photos (means either I’m a famous patient a doctor would be aware of … therefore as a patient in what way would a doctor be in support of how things are now and in what way as a patient am isolated in life made to complain). I’ve briefly addressed looking bad fixed reality and my life on my own losing everything and relationships and nothing can be done if you can’t be helped so that’s “giving up on you” “can’t help you” and that’s a lesson on improving and being told to go to the hospital … in the end “court I learned its up to me to improve” and re: bullying you can be hurt look stupid lose everything at any point in life (it was my recommendation to lighten up (if you’ve lived enough to get hurt) why would I complain if I recover have a dream boyfriend lose everything and my job (if you suggest lighten up and argue “a hard life or making life seem hard can affect kids” in what way would I hypotheses that … that if my brain can’t comprehend getting sick, insult, making fun of my childhood deductions or books, and I’m 38 means I’m doing a good job taking breaks and talking about subjects until things are shared (nothing secret) and is how I get hurt acting like making fun of me is my job or what you do with a life (that’s comparing me sharing about a yearlong ordeal with godaddy and LAPD and didn’t make a big deal about anything online and managed bullying and death threats took many years to talk normal with someone who hurts you (I’m realizing that reading from my life if I’m hurt that’s to treat me like I didn’t admire work hard professional toward).

Running 🏃‍♀️ (archive)

———- Forwarded message ———

From: Leslie Fischman <[email protected]>

Date: Tue, Aug 8, 2023 at 9:01 PM

Subject: Running

To: <[email protected]>, <[email protected]>, <[email protected]>

Running

01-29-23 45 mins

01-30-23 10 mins

02-01-23 50 mins

02-09-23 45 mins (disabled, still, head)

02-21-23 (needed rest not myself) skip’d

Went to the hospital not feeling well.

02-26-23 – skipped

02-27-23 – 15 mins

02-28-23 – 20 mins (AA) -12 steps twitter

03-12-23 – 1 hr (outside) blog better

03-13-23 – 32 mins (work on being +)

03-18-23 – 30 mins (blogging again)

03-19-23 – 11 mins (bad day pain challenging writing w/apologies can’t fix)

03-21-23 – 1 hr (had massive headache)

03-24-23 – 30 mins treadmill

03-25-23 – 40 mins treadmill (work hard)

Describing mental illness instead of being fed up or complain explain it how it happens by what story exp repeated to me and what does that prove harm to me and what purpose causing me illness

03-27-23 – 30 mins treadmill (stomach)

03-28-23 – 8 mins (app not working)

03-28-23 – elliptical 15 mins (Geodone)

03-31-23 – 54 mins treadmill

04-05-23 – 26 mins treadmill (history talk)

04-06-23 – 30 mins (weights) write today

04-07-23 – 30 mins (wghts) write + today

04-08-23 – 30 mins – ebook 🌸 new #

04-08-23 – 1 hr – spoke well to # – light

04-09-23 – 16 mins treadmill – ID P GV I

04-10-23 – 1 hr run w/break (voices) W M

04-10-23 – 1 hr treadmill (write/emailDA)

04-10-23 – 1 hr treadmill (GV today L)

04-10-23 – cancelled – took meds.

04-11-23 – 32 mins (put back V – date)

04-16-23 – 30 mins treadmill (sick 2 days >ER)

04-17-23 – 30 mins treadmill (rp#2, writing again, started blog, quit got sick)

04-17-23 – 45 mins (on prescribed 60mg)

04-19-23 – 1 hr run (upset today, sang)AM

04-19-23 – 22 mins (phone broken) SA -T

04-20-23 – 23 mins (rest) delete twitter args and bullying back doesn’t solve why looking bad to a pervert is some pervert panic attack of emails to justify him -me.

04-20-23 – 18 mins (working thru upset)

It will take 6 months year loosen up. Not model apply not try for award and fix my blog not be punished fix image online. Just got approved FB and court went well after 3 months of being scared not knowing what’s happening sent to ER.

04-22-23 – 20 mins treadmill (head too much talking to my head – chaos).

04-24-23 – 20 mins treadmill (phone broken internet doesn’t work, & website)

04-25-23 – 30 mins treadmill (applied)

-missed recordings here

04-28-23 – 30 mins treadmill (quit SM H T)

04-28-23 – 21 (I’m ok not S) (why panic I was prosecuted by voices over street code I don’t go by things I notice hear) mins treadmill (2009 prevention combining crimes no images)

05-09-23 – 30 mins (missing may log) 144lbs

05-09-23 – 30 mins (missing may times) – check other phone notes

05-10-23 – 23 mins (stress, hacked)

05-11-23 – 30 mins (new ig – quotes)

05-14-23 – 30 mins (head hurts today)

05-14-23 – 1 hr treadmill (arms 2x)

05-15-23 – 30 mins (took Geodone prozac)

05-15-23 – 30 mins (wrote, no panic)

05-25-23 – 40 mins treadmill (weight: 140) size 29 metabolism works eating carbs & okay

05-28-23 16 mins (break blogging – suicidal) focus on staying in a feeling backing off … not engage fighting at all. Not waste my energy explaining. Get well stop participating. If I’m hurt it’s too late then I can’t help anyone. Improvement doesn’t matter. Just back off not talk anyone.

06-02-23 30 min treadmill (voices, deleting)

06-06-23 30 mins treadmill (get moving) – sick for 4 days stomach ache – head sickness for 2 weeks from bullying tech

06-12-23 20 mins (recovery drank) w/break

06-13-23 (gym) 30 mins treadmill + weights

Cycling Tuesday, Wednesday, Thurs, Sat.

06-13-23 20 run (1 laps – 20 mins) #police

Start 5:00 (writing way there)

06-13-23 40 min treadmill (1 hr 30 mins)

06-14-23 20 mins (organize room work)

06-15-23 1 hr treadmill (bullied) MH fitness

06-19-23 30 min (gym) + 1hr home treadmill (detox 3 days, court tmrw) – light headed – 1st day back to gym

06-20-23 – stress court writing unusual4me

06-22-23 – drank wine at home (- msgs)

06-23-23 – paid WordPress fix website

06-23-23 – still break from blogging

06-23-23 – 40 min run + sand (strength)

06-23-23 – gym weights fix body shape

Weight routine: arms (3 machines) stomach (2 machines) legs (2 machines) + cardio

06-23-23 – 1hr treadmill (quit msgr) (gym) 2.78 miles

06-23-23 – (break blogging)

06-24-23 – 1hr run + gym (journal today)

06-26-23 – 34 min treadmill + weights

06-26-23 – gaining weight (status)

07-05-23 – 10 mins (psychiatry today) sober (not feeling well Bc applied hosp).

07-13-23 – 36 mins (writing) weight 146 stop eating food today get down 130s.

07-18-23 – 1 hr treadmill (didn’t sleep wasted meds hacked insulted couldn’t run) conversation revisited suicide causes to me. What hurtful permanent insulting. (158lbs) — Gained 18 lbs since NY (from eating food)

-goal weight: 120 lbs, no fighting no guilt criticism too late disability not blog about it.

07-22-23 – 15 mins (2 day detox) arms

07-22-23 – 23 mins

08-08-23 – 45 mins treadmill (interview tm)

Book 📖 (archive) #3

Book #3 – look for draft of chapters written separate from 1 and 2 re-written

Rewrite all chapters from now, and see if you want to keep anything past

Living with Schizophrenia

By: Leslie Fischman

Copyright © 2023

All Rights Reserved.

Dedication

This book is dedicated to all those who have ever thought about blogging or writing and ever unsure of where to start. Believe in yourself and worry less about how to start and just begin the journey from wherever you are in life. As you grow as a person and writer, life may change, you may improve, but where you have been and what you have to say is always meaningful just the same, let no one convince you of a standard when it comes to writing and what to think about life, the sky is the limit. Life is what we make of it, and can’t always be determined on the outset rely on being driven by goals in life, eventually it is up to you to make things happen for you in life, so never take support for granted or the opinions of others, however they may change. Life goes on without you, including you, but nothing is beyond your realm of comprehension no subject, no worry, no fear, no question, and sometimes the best way to address what you think or how you feel is to simply put into words what you are thinking or feeling, seems to be the best route toward improvement.

Acknowledgment

In good times and in difficult or trying times, I am always thankful for my audience and support or following online. Although it’s not been a perfect writing career, I appreciate everyone’s patience of my disability since called “schizophrenia” after writing this book and blogging, with acceptance for my feelings having been hurt and the difficult challenge moving forward as criticized, shouted at, condemned, or humiliated online, and never give up in the face of being subjected to bullying (proven or not) and continue to accept my suffering due to “voices” as symptom of the diagnosis of “schizophrenia” (and do my best to move forward without complaining about what hurts me, and not allow myself to get hurt, based on what’s wrong with me, or let any diagnosis destroy me or change opinion of me to negative, or change my ability to write in the positive or manage my symptoms as life continues, it was never my dream to give up and self-harm makes less and less sense the more you don’t allow your story to dictate what other think and don’t enable anyone to experiment with your condition. Privacy matters less the more and more public you become, so accepting the comforts of being alone or given time to recover and just handle life as it occurs, is doing my best, to be the last on to affect anyone or burden anyone with difficulty reading, channeling, becoming who they are, or wonder about what my shoes feel like in life. Chances are if I’m not living life to the best of my ability, photos and social media begin to matter less, and ultimately you are judged for the moments you are struggling, no confident, and let your life be ruined by decisions and choices, as though writing or sickness is a choice or a decision that you’ve made for yourself to deviate from who you were when you were happy, let no unhappiness anger displeasure or upset directed toward you in life convince you that this is a bad life that’s the challenge to most to be unaffected. A disease with no cure is a mental challenge to accept what you can’t change and although it hurts to accept and to share about, sometimes accepting life as hurt or bullied, is one step closer to preventing a condition from worsening or spreading to others so justify a continued mistreatment of you. I now recognize that no matter where I’ve been and no matter what I’ve said, what matters now is how I feel, how others are made to feel, and distinguish between what is considered my fault, and to accept the discomfort of ridicule and demoralization, that was certainly never planned, but you don’t get to choose which life you lead or what you deserve in life, and you just have to keep living whether life gets more difficult or confusing and focus on yourself and continue to have a keen awareness for what others think, that’s a given as a writer. Never forget who matters to you and knew you before schizophrenia, never forgot who was hurt when disabled and forced to undergo painful treatments and improvements that didn’t last, and continue to take responsibility for how you feel and how others feel even if its not your job, no one can afford to give up in life, and if that’s the one circumstance that teaches you of what’s a team or not, it will be based on your life as a human being, whether your success or failures are being judged as transferable issues or mental health related beliefs that should justify continued sickness suffered by you or continue negative judgment of your ability to help others. Simply tell the truth, and for everything else wrong with you misunderstood or failure discerned or later coming to be, see that as a reflection of losing your battle with voices bullying and a disease with no cure, that is a reality that no one can accept or be happy for and support, so remember when you were supported, and likewise in defeat, continue to not forget who you were before you were ever subjected to a worse life, its no reason to end your life, success or failure doesn’t determine how you should live and neither should people determine what your day to day functioning is about or allow anyone to be given control as to your well being and ability to survive. Sometimes its everyone’s business to care, and sometimes your better off not being so open, and hurt maybe less, next lifetime. Nothings perfect and no pain is easy to address, not your own, not the feelings of others, and no matter what statements you have made, if you opened your life up to others, and ignored because you are open and in public online, to accept the losses of not being acknowledged in life, and continue to accept rejections and lawsuits as a manifestation of opinions being generated about you not to your knowledge and nothing that can be prevented or defended, sometimes mental health means that you lose in life, and never get to live a normal life, sometimes the opinions of others take place of your own, forever misunderstood. So pray for forgiveness and if things get worse, don’t allow the hurt to get the best of you or change you everyone is worth so much more than bullying is never justified. So let this be a lesson on trending and being ignored, its short lived appreciation and value that is never realized based on how you’ve failed in life, no JD and “schizophrenia” so while your life is summed up to hurtful words that cant be taken back, don’t be one to sound defensive or complain about who’s hurt you and just improve, sometimes its when you’re hurt requires you to forgive and that’s a hard lesson and a difficulty pain or disability that cannot be undone, so that’s the lesson in being shamed, no believed, and viewed in the negative, loss of respect, disbelief, comparison, disempowerment, and living life as though you never existed and continuing to exist even though your existence is questioned as beneficial or helpful.

About the Author

Top 100 Blogger, who launched her first distributed blog on Weebly and WordPress, and after many efforts and challenges to be approved and not complained about eventually became a success however was never able to overcome “schizophrenia” voices, or bullying resulting from a diagnosis that forever changed me and a support of women that was ridiculed and made to be about sexuality at a later point in time, you cant make everyone happy being you in life, so if its ever questioned what’s about you, if success is viewed as occurring no because of you and without credit, don’t be afraid to start over and prove yourself again, every year of life is a new challenge, and maybe a new problem to face, and remember all your moments of pain in life whether known disclosed or explained, sometimes the best way to prevent the onset of self harm or bullying is to not even begin to explain how hurtful words are in the first place, its harder to prove you are well or anyone deserving of a life and payment for your services if there is constant confusing and motivation to convince everyone that you are sick, or speak wrong or inappropriate, what is being human about, not being all the things that you are later called in life to distinguish your value from others, remember who you are and what you mean to others, much more to those you love than anyone else, and while you may never know what disappointment is about learning to accept that hospital has become something not overcome and whatever is occurring for me now, is considered to illustrate or contest wellness or intelligence, in place of seemingly giving up to a diagnosis. No battle is ever good enough to convince anyone you are well, and sometimes in sickness, is when people recognize when your feelings matter, and that’s the unfortunate aspect of learning about who is human or not, when my feelings don’t matter, ignored, then treat me as responsible for the feelings of those who don’t talk to me ignore me and speak about me and refuse to help me, learn to help myself, and ignore what all the noise is about not let myself be affected and hurt, I cant solve what people think or their problems, the best life I can live, is to be problem free, live without fighting, replying, or treated as fuel to justify any hate or anger directed to me, or any people, group Whio

Who I was before “Schizophrenia.”                                                    

You can do your best and your best may not be good enough. By the time you arrive to a better place in life, you’ll wonder what could have been had you stayed well on consistent through and through, nothing really can explain your lost years, but diagnoses and medications. So learn to weather the storms in life. We are all capable of improving, is all a matter of what you set your mind to, you can accomplish. So set your mind on things that matter, and set yourself apart, by being yourself, not worried for what others think.

I think I’m a good example of someone who in spite of differences and hardships faced along the way as a writer, managed to overcome those period of embarrassment, shame, and humility, and not make that my story, a chapter to recreate in my life, or a story to relive over and over again, eventually you learn from the mistakes of self-publishing, you won’t know how special you are until you publish a book, its not anything that anyone can make happen for you in life, everything takes time, hard earned effort, and honesty.

You can either make a story about yourself, or make your story about others, whatever the circumstances may be make your story important and one that is worth the read. Otherwise spare yourself the energy of investigation, of who’s who or what what is about, be about yourself and doors will open for you, the less intimidated you are along the way for sharing who you are, and the parts of your story that you can remember if its not been too long, since you’ve thought about life, or had a chance to reflect and remember.

Nothing is certain without concrete examples of who you are and who you were, but nothing will be as important as how you sound now, that’s what really reflects character, and shows that you’re an honest person and mean well. All the details will matter less in the long run. Is it that you remember life thoughtfully, or is it you that’s forgotten and not thought of thoughtfully. Whatever the case may be, do as your told, follow directions, report anything that you’re not sure of, ask good questions, and learn life as you go just like everyone else. You don’t need a plan to have life happen for you, you simply need to continue learning and not  make mistakes or break you or destroy respects for you.

Acknowledgment

Without education there can be no realization of ones own sense of worth in the world, nor positions given to anyone who doesn’t achieve a sense of normalcy in face of odds in life, only by what we are rooted in, can we grow.

CONTENTS

Dedication

Acknowledgment

Preface

Chapter 1 Name

Chapter 2 Name

Chapter 4 Name

Chapter 5 Name

Chapter 6 Name

Chapter 7 Name

About the Author

Please Note: When I was respected and considered of value with an important story that was intended to inspire others to overcome mental health issues and improve these were descriptions of me that once created a positive impression of me. Since writing this book, it has become more important to write from where I am now, and what’s relevant to life as a 38 year old, not re-publish a book written 2018.

I grew up in Brentwood, and attended two prestigious grade schools Kindergarten through 12th Grade, the base of my education. I then went on to College at University of Colorado at Boulder, where I pursued a Psychology degree, and graduated with a Sociology Degree. After writing my Honors Thesis, I graduated with Departmental Honors, Cum Laude.

I decided to go to Law School 2006, when I took my first LSAT. I served as the Clerk of Rolls and Secretary of my school’s Law Fraternity, and won a Witken Award my second year in Law School, receiving an A in Advanced Legal Writing. After experiencing mental health issues, I decided to leave Law School and pursue a Masters in Law, graduating with a MSL in the Science of Laws in the field of Risk Management and Compliance.

Writing has always been my passion, its why I switched majors to Sociology to take essay based exams, which highlighted my strengths besides participating weekly in lectures always raising my hand to speak. When beginning my career blogging online I was nominated for a Shorty Award, while providing advocacy online as a blogger, working on my first book, writing self-help quotes, and marketing myself to working Professionals who provide care to those in need, who I aspired to be one day.

It was not all together evident that my bipolar disorder was the cause of so much change in my life, as the years blew by, one relationship failing after the next, writing became the primary means for me to stay social and stay present. After visiting the US Supreme Court hearing (2013) it became clear to me that I was not finishing my JD, and cried in court, so much work and effort.

Instead of wasting my education I applied to another Law School, it was my dream to attend Law School and Finish, and that dream is finally coming true for me (2019). I learned that through education the best version of yourself, lies in your work ethic, and ability to maintain focus under pressure, not necessarily based on which occasions you rise to, one should always rise above hate. Focusing on tasks that oriented me toward a better future for myself, not easily disorganized by the opinions of others, facing adversity as bullied, hearing voices and losing my face, gaining weight, and writing books and running/power-walking have been my primary means for coping, aside from work and school. A learned skill writing in public, and confidence assembled in part by writing online, in blog posts, shared and now liked.

 Email 📧 (22) archive

VISITED US SUPREME COURT JANUARY 2013. Why should I be looked at what does that mean who took a anxiety med in reaction to being looked at and laughing mean I’m awake it means I’m at peace therefore why or why not does sitting in a room for 3.5 HOURS MEAN IM GUILTY THERE BECAUSE IM GUILTY ABOUT MY SCHOOL GRADES OR ABOUT MASS SHOOTINGS OR MY NOTES TRUE OR NOT TRUE RELEVANT HELPFUL OR UNPROFESSIONAL IN WHAT WAY ARE MASS SHOOTINGS PREVENTED? Please explain to me why visiting scotus is a joke, traveling to DC a joke, who I am or how I dress look a joke, when have I never been combative, what’s funny about my trip drinking or police or writing in the snow what means what about me personally that I should know or didn’t appear in a way authorized to visit people of importance to me at the highest rank in the us government mean what about changes to my look and appearance mean or shouted at 6 times means (everyone is above me should tell me I’m nobody accuse me of being poor or disrespectful and wrongfully accuse me of being combative when others combative toward me for no reason) therefore a blog is privilege helping to solve issues so people can work and not be offensive means what about my court documents untrue (a when I can report helpful or what about not being right or allowed to ask questions end when I’m treated like someone who doesn’t deserve in what way should that be justified or all be connected to something wrong or true deserved or undeserved and why?) 

Bullying doesn’t stop until? When (I didn’t know when since everything I’ve done responsibly and shared as helpful still cannot prevent voices) so what motivates voices? (When I perform or don’t, disabled or recovered, sober or not sober, prayer guilt care or insensitivity, belong doesn’t belong, can help or can’t help, there may be no eventual acceptance of me until made fun of for (1) bridge tagged (2) film job (3) what makes fires in common to me or any facts (4) army allocations strong or weak being a joke (5) bullied proper to changed sound mean means I’m someone better than who I’m made to become after sharing how hurt (7) change is turns into offender is unhelpful to offenders to say I become an offender to accuse people of being good and seeing me having the issue reportable as I’m common accuse me of helping offenders (8) So me moving forward isn’t accepted because can’t accept when I’m upset and anytime I’m upset it’s not justified or accuse me of being hurt complaining or normal back to who makes what true or untrue who’s fault and why (it’s doing well upset after improving get sick again and again means others giving up on me are remembered and what’s not remembered is me improved so voices don’t stop until the issue happens again (inability to type or accuse my peace of any stage improved accuse me of expectation left alone not bothered private women up reminded or hurt suggests what’s more true). Hurting me (no consequences to who isn’t analyzed makes more true a group effort or belief about me), accusing me of moving on or able to achieve states of intelligence or success with problems or people mad at me or guilty or a past unstated or made to be remembered hurtful or my fault interpret as my body decomposing or not healthy around other people accuse me of sickness addiction or being ugly on purpose my fault. 

Email 📧 (23) archive

Repercussion. Writing too late. No future (joke) my plans impossible. No future is (not the dream) or mean. Keep using voices spread word “P.” Then tell the entire world (after 38 years of life the joke is calling me a “schizophenic pervert” therefore of giving up is (not fighting) … you don’t accept who I am and what’s not cool is being tough …. What’s not cool as hurt joke … not cool ruining dating or work chances…. Voices winning is spreading word “P” and non acceptance of me a forget joke hurt feelings joke (and chats or sickness is a suicide joke) there’s no concern and word “P” is not concerning therefore me being suicidal isn’t of concern or rationale …. In the end I have to accept dislike and threat and no trust and (zero future) is voices winning …. So it’s my limits so I’m made punish my head repeatedly (because accuse me not responding proper to 50 cent) …. Therefore hurting me a suicide joke is a song dedication poem joke …. To think this means code about you this means known this means famous … make fun hospital (if said caught solve voices) given 8 days to be well (was worth it) and if voices and war on me forced (spread word Pervert) is a hurt unrecognized then accept to spread the word … chat solve voices …. And if no cares if I die don’t accuse me of issues I don’t have (not caring if I die if didn’t care then) then calling me “P” and accusing me saying word “F” as hurtful means you don’t care who I am so continue not fight (keep spreading the word and ruining my life) and see my (future not possible no happening) so that’s believed in not believed him the issue faced by innocent (let down so accuse me helping — accuse me having something that’s not acceptable …. And continue push for spreading word “P” and for that to be peoples peace and “no future” the peace “dying” thought deserved “improvement” discredited …. Until no inner circle no help no correspondence … I can give up doesn’t mean I didn’t help voices or not working hard I’m not allowed to rest be at ease so don’t accuse writing or meds or “P” or any complaint the issue (it’s until no one’s helping me ….) is accusing me of hurt alone guilty beat up suicide joke. I give up I did my best accused me hurting faith everyone forgiven protected and constant punish me hurt me make fun of my timeline …. I did my best! #scotus

Email 📧 (24) archive

Goals … fix attitude not give up not okay hurt myself say things (be convinced anyone wants me hurt continue get back not hurt by voices shouting compassion be adult take responsibility upsets … accept reversed conditions … life is promised exact hurdles challenges … learn mistakes continue to focus on what I’ve said wrong and why and how punished continue focus on myself and lesson is don’t contact (harassment) too late explanation unnecessary constant about how I sound not bossy or question continue to accept issue love and respect isn’t asked for requested for or sought no difficulty in life is about teaching me I’ve done wrong what can’t fix or give up and continue to remember caps and terms make me sound mentally ill hurts, complain hurts punished, recovered, change joke, continue either accept me of taking responsibility and continue to keep my distance continue to accept who I am online what I sound like instantly privilege is lost so that’s nice to then rejected teaches me what’s wrong with me can’t be helped … continue reflect on on how not stating sober or drinking makes me look disrespectful not proud of family or hurtful continue to comprehend why after a drink something wrong with me instead viewed as proud respect fragile hurt family reflect on what’s upsetting about me if I drink and in what ways is my life not special and in what way is the issue (constant accusing me racism) and not recognize how hard to be around people accuse me …. Not cool by or accuse me racism based on whether or not I have a job make of issue why not accuse me of suffering something known my fault or making big deal to any other country not defensive ….

Email 📧 (25) archive

Having been hurt by deletion, doesn’t mean I’m in control … of what problem is …. Its clear since you’re accusing me criticism —- work being alone 6 months to a year to court be best I can be …. Not be a passed around guilty joke (pretend worse than of is) … I’m responsible if anyone gets sick anyone complain remove me online be banned …. So no messages (means that’s not viewed as who I am or to Todd) therefore voices don’t get my hurt (I can’t prevent and no one cares what others think to accuse me bad things said and sick) so since ER making fun of me making big deal (it’s not what’s the truth) reinforced treatment is separation (continue to give up on things possible) until my ex attorney is defended and I look dramatic…. It’s not me doesn’t trust believe … in the end … constant scaring me sick … never be okay to live life (based on all the difficulty viewing me as stupid improvement not respected) …. I didn’t hurt Todd I’m not a pretend sick person my past isn’t dark story untold or told insensitive and if no one can accept my mental health …. Please stop accusing my idea prevention a joke … new car attacked voices, hone hospital attack voices, bad hair cut attack voices, changing my face in a week to something odd can’t prevent voices … not concerned about leaving me alone with voices …. Please don’t accuse me elsewhere or make believe …. Since no one cares feelings hurt and I’m being given hard time other women affected by me …. =Punish, keep me sick.

Email 📧 (26) archive

I did everything right positive loving met up with everyone getting jobs (what couldn’t be solved voices and why ruining my life is continued enjoyment of anyone or any issue — I never treated others insensitively and I’m not not respectful important lives so this don’t complain complain lies or accuse me pretend heroism or guilt (accusing problem not accepting me well thinking ruining my life is devastating deserved) accuse me dramatic …. Handling life responsibly …. No one accepting my day meds use … awake at night or thinking is offensive …. Making fun of being helped so taking away all help … until what matters …. I can’t prevent voices … it’s a constant sexuality identity joke no one cares I’m changed make fun of me and treating me not improved or not helpful … constant accusing me of not promoting work of others on blog when it’s not their image it’s by response …. So accusing me of writing in a way that is another’s product is ruining my websites to accuse me “strategy thinking how to think product” as a secret used …. Accuse me not promoting people (at a certain point I stopped promoting for whatever reasons and there were many times expressed interest). — win for voices – is watched schizophenia called names along whole world think that not accepting of me a too late life joke hurting me accuse me making anyone look mean accuse me unsupported ugly boobs joke seeing be naked making fun of my weight loss doesn’t mean I’m a sex joke or survivor joke …doesn’t mean anyone strong or proud of me it’s about treating me not hot not smart and convincing me and everyone fascination hurting my feelings … so although no one’s affected (mental health is pandemic … not writing quotes means by words accuse not advise and not write to help myself because accused casing mental illness relapse death accuse my life painful or lost faith something I can’t see if accept … so constant issue is why am I not dead … seeing wellness as cheating or genetics … constant obesity joke …. “Doing to myself my fault” jokes (effort writing in publics joke) accuse me being mean (threat or not stick up for politely valid in an educated way) and empathize with Aurora shooter and make fun of my hair cause me punch my head not care if I did accuse me hurtful to someone you’re accusing me hurting and blaming who I am inside or become is a transfered state of mind blaming me for …. Like a book joke blame joke …for everything goes wrong (me being hurt doesn’t excuse not caring which is why no one cared if I died because didn’t like that video) and because that’s viewed as true we can also accept everything that occurs as my fault and accuse me making up stuff doing nothing at fault or liable unprofessional not strong … I can’t prevent harm … choosing to not complain respond well (opposite occurred fighting making fun hospital … making fun flushed meds is not about 2009, punching my head is mental illness joke …. I’m not going back …. Until voices are recognized as humans who think hurting me not respect limits is a dying of guilt joke and accuse me no future govt punished and wrongfully accuse me presentable acting … I’ve not changed … it’s it’s not been accepted hurtful can’t be prevented and making my life worse is to destroy who I was or messages …. Because it’s a die at home joke .. so I’m accused (lying or treason or destruction of records a Hillary joke) what’s not important is who I loved and what it sounded like (if the issue is P gay fan site blaming me …. Then I’m not responsible being well or I’m avoidance a guilty treated joke pretend blaring signs …. I don’t belong because made sick day back …. No one cares recovered …. So I’m not a watched forgets watched joke not trusted if watched and lawsuit is to accuse me prosecute me — not talking anyone for the rest of my life because you can’t get over calling me P, treat me inappropriate, not working ….

Email (27) archive

Voices (to drink not get hurt) Punished not sober make serious. Accuse me drink (wrong time) F up. Accuse me not helping normal. Looking at me stupid. Not trusting me a watched joke. Accuse me hurt by my words hurt myself. Saying I feel like dying said that. Then not considering my limits. Voices voices until punching my head. Making fun of me sick or causes. Make fun of me asking yell think funny. Waste money $200 day and accuse me of on vacation hotel social shelter.

Email 📧 (28) archive

What’s a fact or sickness? (1) photo of Justice Ginsberg. (2) making fun of me running. (3) putting two two together Boston. (4) accuse me of being flicked off. (5) creating a belief known hurtful. (6) making of issue emails not safe. (7) hurting me not safe accuse blame. (8) hurting me by book written. (9) cause me voices accuse me hearing anyone of delusional blame me. (10) not recognize I’m struggling and think retaliation can hear me struggling make fun of emailing a book before Kate Spade’s suicide so hurting my corporation image websites writing (so it’s shocked wasnt issue not reported as nothing as told I was made to appear strangled in photo to treat me as insensitive of respond to anything my fault so class not accepted is why it isn’t my fault and thinking is my fault I’d accuse my work read or followed saved or taken down blame me as doing anything wrong providing value (with hate site up) benefit hurt me read my book (not protected) accuse me not taking responsibility for my own timeline figure out what’s wrong or the error (sought: deleted emails, running, racist, what’s wrong —- means nothing I’ve done right matters …. It’s until it’s explained enough times voices feel justified and until people feel like truth or life is occurring because I was figured out punished a suicide offender joke …. So it’s not who’s a hero forgiven I’m not it’s now an issue we’ll or aging so I went well to aging accuse me suffering in common or lying means (want to know why people are dying and don’t consider me as representing what makes those valued strong) so the code is not it’s about me the code is then to confirm ridiculing me careful communicated to make fun of poem (think it’s about anyone) and think I’m an addict more or hopping is who I am is how I got hurt …. So things I’m not allowed live separate from and not viewed as hardworking heroic is: (1) what is my connection to Barack (2) travel recording emails. (3) FedEx effort helpful (4) hearing storm name think of me (5) accuse me secretary (deleter) (6) not respected keep everything. (7) to treat me insulted by compliment. (8) code is forgiveness understand them. (9) hard on me given options ruined. (10) everything made me strong issue. (11) blaming me Boston see running guilt. (12) blaming me for Aurora see my twitter as sick. (13) accuse me being guilty to mention but for 10 years improve and called “P” so it’s safer to confirm what you think justifies making fun of me strong well (14) confirm blame (iMovie) humor (15) to connect ex neighbor who’s the widow to a beloved comedian during my Shorty application card made last. (16) make fun of my friendships jobs. (17) continue humiliate me bad pictures not appreciate deleting Instagram … doesn’t mean facing insult is the solution either keep things expose me like not a big deal (18) hospital and what occurs outside. (19) my story (see treatment) loser. (20) accuse me at fault “Chapman” (21) room me with women and make fun of me accuse me being weird (22) Job viewed as nothing face joke. (23) Robertson blame Instagram. (24) devalued home is joke & my life. (25) able to work when can I work again. (26) making fun of job rejections. (27) expose for truth versus recognize I tell the truth since I can’t prevent term P or voices punched my head … this is the solution to confirm as fact who is supported not accuse me secrets guilt or close to anyone to get well … (28) insult to hurt feelings. (29) no one cares about voices. (30) accusing me of bad life. (31) accuse me not trustworthy. (32) so not talking about life. (33) harping on complaints (accuse sickness not respectful of others) (34) continued he doesn’t love me. (35) continued I’m dating him reaction. (36) non acceptance for being ignored and not caring voices hurting me (37) expecting I’m going to jail. (38) continue spread rumors like s belief joke or reputation fake defamation joke. (39) thinking I’m stupid unimpressed

Email 📧 (29) + archive

Just took 2 15 mg adderrall punching my head. 

I can’t afford these conversations. 

How many days it takes to sound smart. 

Treated like fucking idiot – won’t pay me! 

Won’t hire me! Accuse me devils work.

It’s a website. 

It’s a competition online. 

Ask them their stats, formula. 

Don’t accuse my formula success broken or fraud. It’s real real money us made it’s a real personality I’m not a shitty weird person who laughs at people awkward fucked up face accusing people of being me like a ducking life exchange joke – FUCKING BE SO ALIVE until I’m 80 years old so no one dies over ducking face exchange retardation air discrimination. 

Punching my head today shouting “leave me alone” tired of voices tired of being treated wrongfully and bullied. I’m sick and tired of being teamed up against. I’m sick of being abused and tormented. I’m sick of being tortured. I’m sick of being lied to I’m sick being treated as a joke and I’m sick of being caused suicide or self harm and I’m sick of of being valued as a woman and being accused of things I’m not issue (head small shouted at) then not listening when I said I’m at my limit I will hand myself shoot me in the head means todays peace wasn’t respected until I started punching myself in the head. Doesn’t mean I’m ugly or judgmental it means that you are! I’m one person I’m online that’s my identity and my voice and those are my photos and I refuse to die because anyone thinks funny punch my head shrunk many head blame me as masturbation jail joke … is not what I’ve done wrong in life it’s what’s done wrong to me! And why are mass shootings happening and what does punching my head prove YOU DONT RECOGNIZE I’m smart and beautiful IS THE FUCKING PROBLEM!

Tweet:

After hospital – get voices again treated as sick watched persecuted the same connect to your body pretend other people are you or close to you and they’re not create abusive experiment of my body invading my privacy causing torment suicide. Upon complaining tried to put me back in the hospital after I was treated for rest and felt better but shocked by the news and difficulty blogging again. To blog again … Hospitalized voices tormented. Invaded privacy exposed unknowns. Being close to who I love not respected. Online expected closeness why? Persecuted for instability after hospital. Tormented bullied and injured rejected. My stability is affected voices. Made to shout be defensive. Telling my mom about what happened. Accuse me of homophobia – issue is discriminating me persecuting. Accusing me not being hurt. Wrongfully accuse me of prosecution. Injure me treat me as stupid made up. It takes Twitter a few days + 3 written posts consistent – without erupted disheveled state of psychosis mental illness … so if I’m improved convex happen again until I’m punching my head on my balcony for writing emails to everyone to explain how I’ve been hurt. Therefore me protecting myself is not allowing myself to be hurt or treated as guilty and not respecting my privacy means I don’t have to perform to any standards in life if I’m being killed injured then you don’t recognize my life …. You think life is better if I died 2009. You don’t recognize value of me alive. You don’t respect my stability. Therefore I’m not mentally ill. Subject is mass shootings, & gay. To prevent mass shootings be clear. Don’t team women up on me. Don’t team men up on me. And I have the right to delete anything if you don’t resist my privacy of the truth then it’s not for you to study end my life wrongfully prosecute me accuse me of missing anything online everything private us online nothing private that would make or break opinion of me. My love is my right to privacy.

I intended to follow up, tired from hospital stay and all the news upon getting home. 

I have work to do that prevents me from being treated hospitalized right now that’s more important than therapy, I’m the meantime hired a psychotherapist for privacy right now and have too many problems to sit in group therapy. 

Doing my best. My work is more important than treatment if treatment is affecting my freedoms and what people think of me I don’t need to be made to look worse or don’t belong in treatment when recovered made sick again at home by voices means hospital is to disconnect from hacking voices and bullying as needed. 

Not feeling well need to stay home punching my head today made to shout given voices ridiculing me deleted all messenger texts to who I love, what’s unclear is how listening to my body recording and in what way is my privacy violated accusing me of not being sick then not treated as a patient in real life and in what way am I prosecuted to punish me I humanely enable people to bully me not respect my condition. 

Sincerely, 

Leslie Fischman 

OJ had a stack of playboys in his bathroom cabinet (fact) me modeling was after weight loss fired after someone had sed with me at work teamed up on unstable (after cancer), pretending to be CIA, with me respecting them then not respecting me, and did the issue on race nudity and sexuality to be represented in a grose way accuse me being a sex symbol and hate on me — compare move ridicule me (figure out your own likes dislikes sexuality and mental health without me) clearly misheard my 911 calls (it’s what hurts hurts voices hurt you shrink my head (b) cause me punch my head until head is small) not compassion for me as a patient then fuck my wellness and presentation (stopped writing quotes stop modeling stop writing scientific arguments and stop video and stop blogging until all the issues are written however staged as many times for voices to not hurt me and not hurt me as stated through me) …. Did next 10 years until the day I die I give up!

Just learned the street name to the most recent mass shooting (is shocking on the basis that Laguna Woods whether intended to reference me) now try to accuse me not being liked or carrying myself offensively provoking for it (accuse hospitalization as risk provoking) or accuse me subjecting others to risk accuse my blog as not in reality or job is safe reality I’m not privileged to and not creating unsafe reality blogging (isn’t my purpose … so if IMDb as viewed as not approaching a subject) it occurring again with name reference “Toro” and my last name sounds like Fish – man, is to create for a similar blame like Laguna Woods shocking hurtful …. I already suffered for many days back from the hospital and expected to continue treatment therefore my shock of focus (isn’t a continue joke well keep going joke) is not the joke (to blame me) jeopardize membership to (downplay defamation of health concerns) it’s justifying voices as a controlling factor outside accuse my family of not being with god and thinking god is people seeing my family as small like control of us is in reverse to control of all wrongfully accuse me controlling many accuse me abandonment without experience blogging how deadly and painful stressful it can be —- so knowing that sick again to blame me for COVID, accuse me of no future not working out not a role model …. Think I can handle more losses or blame …. Accuse me punching my head like I knew street band Toro (fish referencing) accuse me speaking to a subject brave (as everyone knows something shocking hurtful that injuring me causing me pain is to accuse me of being things believed in coordination of being my fault what I’m called is to blame me for mass shootings) and I was made sick suicidal mentally ill after the hospital because the street name “Toro” is being viewed in conjunction to Laguna Woods and you expect me to not be hurt and handle hurt by voices and accuse me suicide joke (if you can’t tell my life where I’m headed I’m not going anywhere you can’t see if tell) therefore when it comes to nasa shootings (since Laguna Woods could not be overcome) and since 914 Harvard street couldn’t be overcome January 2017, as a result whats the solution of confirmation sought …. Treating me complaining then worsen my condition punching my head (make difficult issues accuse me not working out for others causing death) means me getting sick (accuse me of being sick at fault) and think suicide is justified and hospital (saved) is not deserved based on my disability caused in response to describe his hurtful voices are …. So if that’s failed discussion voices occurring again is to fail my writing and now after Toro and Laguna Woods treat me as dying or suicidal or “pervert” to say that’s the joke (accuse me hospitalized not doing my best being strong make more deadly conditions after hospital testing me —- making me sick over and over again based on being well thinking that’s what wrong). So I didn’t give up it’s voices kept hurting me misunderstand self harm and suicide don’t care about me. #scotus @OCDAToddSpitzer

Lesson caused by voices is if voices hurt me untrue or made true for any reason and they think it’s funny when I’ve gotten sick past or what for … if caused again means I will be sick again for 10 years is a normal estimate of how long it takes to feel good be proud or accomplished (success is now based on mass shooting prevention) issue is what issue represented by whom (blame). Accuse my moments upset or deleted texts “flipping out” or serious when everyone’s at peace normal (to accuse me discussing voices — I recognize difficult not proper to message or talk about with anyone upset can’t be proven turn my words into against others or accuse my words of changing from comfort to mentally ill like I’m something strong or scary can’t be loved accuse me as being for strong scary placements — ignore who I was loving or who I was as a person (what can’t be undone is that voices resulting in not believing who I am or improved in what way and destroying my life … over difficulty discussion accuse me talking about causing discomfort as though voices are real people or me people I know accuse me speaking to others or messenger like they’re doing something to me can control or speak to voices get them to stop is treating me … asks for help to stop (accuse me not being subjected to terms asking for it) accuse my recognition of deleting 3 texts (doesn’t matter deleted all messages —- is memorable to me permission to love be safe have a life) in place of that o have nothing over controversy term “P” how justified why normalize a term (of “schizophenia” misuse me as strong enough to handle bullying discrimination viewed stupid mentally ill (after helping everyone) then accuse me of being stupid (not having witnessed everyone overcome difficulty find trust in one another) accuse me of being in hell or because I recognized (crime) at one point in time (described it as when everyone is at peace who stands out) so now the goal is to provoke me cause me mental illness hurtful by words because I stated giving up describing hurting myself hurts me (accuse my words as hurtful when it’s who I am rejected made fun of and bullied) so what’s not forgiveable? (My defenses to being given voices after hospital sounding mentally ill scared messaging treatment sound like I need to go back, missing a PHP in person Appt scheduled same day as discharge day …) responding to bullying shouting in my room (became the proof to hate me) then why reported online (and the tweets in defending against voices is inability to accept being called something hurtful make fun of my definitions and who I’ve been over the years pretend like I’m known or loved or admired or don’t stop or have things don’t deserve (voices don’t respect my peace don’t comprehend how words hurt accuse me saying words hurtful back like I’m hurtful on issues then accuse me being called things I don’t represent not supported in life and continuing to hurt me based on moments I’ve been hurt) so what’s too late is who I was well (what’s unforgivable is me after the hospital) what’s misunderstood is my communications from hospital (what’s not shared is my love for Todd) who’s at risk is me (based on hurting me like I’m talking wrong person then make me talk to regular people or medical professionals like I’m this condition going to a hospital … means make a list of what’s not forgiveable I’ve done or said … and (a) determine justify voices (b) how does punching my head result in satisfaction to voices what does that prove suicide or weakness accuse not strong is a soldier joke (c) then determined whether shootings are occurring because of what voices say (who’s intuition is sick or mean) who’s intended to be insulted as a writer (and in what way does promoting and over promoting a term no matter what stage of recovery I’m in serve to help the masses (if audience is bigger) called p that’s how many people are hurt and stop reading (if I’m hurt punching my head) then question is how can I help why am I not mentally ill.

The lesson here when it comes to religion and reputation innocence is (who improves without you who doesn’t need you how difficult is it for you to apply or text people) and continued pattern is (inability to speak without explanation or information like my life isn’t shocking or disclosing is stuff to hear inappropriate) so it’s judged as that then expected to move on with the damage by rumor (so defending myself is okay …. The issue is when is complaint not okay (if being honest is also with acceptance of non possibility is why close or possible is ruined so nothings possible anyone) …. Deserving or recognizing struggle with (terms made worse to prove — what’s me or a term what have I said or done …. So now 2023 I’ve said things to sound tough or ghetto street or masculine tough to accept bullying isn’t making me tough if I have schizophenia now punching my head means it’s not been solved …. So doing my best to describe what hurts … is what hurts and what occurs also hurts and working online hurts so does applying or getting sick …. So what people get over is their peace (and what I’m viewed held behind in in life is a St Matthews joke) accuse me juicing on adderall not learning disabled keep taking a me away cause me suffering can’t function on the meds … and can’t work …. So I was a good example of compliance productive responsible instead (the poor writing the weight changes the gay issues is the constant upset humor not shared at my expense make fun of where I was in life to not belong anywhere as a jail joke …. #scotus @OCDAToddSpitzer

Missing a + group email

Not archived yet

Lost from permanent records email

What backed up (deleted not by me)

Email chain forward [email protected]

Now taking to hurt me

Combine emails (1-29)

Publish in an ebook:

“Losing My Battle with Voices”

By Leslie Fischman

Email (27) archive

Voices (to drink not get hurt) Punished not sober make serious. Accuse me drink (wrong time) F up. Accuse me not helping normal. Looking at me stupid. Not trusting me a watched joke. Accuse me hurt by my words hurt myself. Saying I feel like dying said that. Then not considering my limits. Voices voices until punching my head. Making fun of me sick or causes. Make fun of me asking for help think funny (making fun of my definition of P as (someone in need – stated on Twitter). Waste money $200 day and accuse me of on vacation hotel social shelter.

Recent Conflict and Fight At Me Outside of Court:

Terms hurt me, description of hurt, insensitivity toward me, and don’t recognize me as a victim to “voices” who are wrongfully punishing me as story known and the cause of shooting, and blame treatment as a known course of action (disrespect looming or not made clear by stats approved of counter the relevance of that having been the issue then or now), and by reading my messages, hurt me as though the public is not entitled to solution, so here is the truth and solution, this is what effort I made battling voices, and what is wanted to be said is what causes me self harm punching my head and suicide, and misuse my writing saving my life, and creating a statement from me, to accuse me of difference felt by another, is wrongful mistreatment and misuse of “me too” and “harassment” and gun violence, to use misuse and accuse the life and story of Leslie Allison Fischman as insensitive to the needs of others to feel smart and be safe and for gun violence to be prevented no matter what intelligence level, to continue to written and represented by me in the form of books published as ebooks.