Resist the Urge to Backtrack …

There are two ways of moving forward, one is to revisit your past, and once that’s dealt with focus on your present, or to think about your future with appreciation for where you’ve been. Notice that in both instances, you are looking at your life through a positive lens. That’s caring for your best interests, whereas someone else upon looking at you, may be looking for errors, as explanation for whatever later difficulties in life, they deem congruent, or a consequence of. If you are to be affected by what others think, that’s by the information you provide for insight be judged, which is bound to make you not feel good, someone thinking they know you better than you know yourself, no one really knows you as well as you do, so have a little faith. Likewise agrees, “So regardless of whether your interpretation of the other person’s behavior is correct, they’re likely to be offended.” [1] Why is that, especially when your not feeling sure about yourself, your heart tends to be open in thinking mode, which means you are trying to hear yourself to identify whats going on within you, and what needs work, in those more vulnerable phases of healing, it can be anyone who thinks theyre close to you, entitled to talk you through what your feeling, as though that resonation with ring a bell in your head, or point you in the right direction. Its times like that that advices can leave a heavy weight, meaning more to think about in terms of where the other person is coming from, that’s them wanting you to think of them, or to view them, as you were before meeting them, put together, and this is the problem with confidence in relationships, if the other is perfected at your expense, you deserve also to remain the same, not be changed or influenced, socially, by the creative spirit of another, who may not have your best interests at heart, seeking to favor their own interpretations of you, which can be by diagnosis, picked apart, or leave you feeling broken. What does it mean to write and how can that be helpful? Well if youre on meds, that’s basically what seeing a psychiatrist is for, you talking them prescribing. Whereas in a social relationship, both should be talking, not one or the other talking leading a conversation, for the other to play doctor on or devils advocate, and tell you how you should think, or be critical of your intended meaning to your words, if there is no connection it makes it difficult to continue to bond, or share a companionship, with that distance in between, not every person you meet with be on board with you, trust you, or favor your best interests, and that’s how someone thinks theyre outgrowing you and doesn’t need you, then once you disconnect all of sudden needs you. There is a way to be mature, throughout all those moments of doubt, and if you are someone who grew up around anyone famous, then you wouldn’t know the superficial tick that goes through the mind of anyone who believes in you or wishes to see a bigger version of yourself, these days by influencer standards, you are liked in a distant way, meaning not bothered, or pushed in a helpful way, to situate you away from others, that’s society leaving you alone, because there is something about you, worth taking another look at, that means youre an interesting person, and sometimes interesting people, are more focused on themselves thinking, that they are soaking up a room full of people, or the present object of their affection, which is not to be tormented by your reputation, which is what I think happens when they are made to think that others think poorly of you, and that’s the problem with taking direction, from the viewpoint of someone outside of you, who may be paying attention to different leads in life, for judgment as to how well integrated you are among others, whether you are someone who speaks in an original fashion, that helps others to think outside the box, or whether you are a domino, or a pin ball machine, bouncing ideas of the presence of others, you know creativity is one of those things, that if you decide to bounce ideas of one another, can actually have the opposite ripple effect, that’s leaving you feeling stupid, you kind of have to have your own gears in life for decision making, in order to stay afloat speaking in front of people, or writing a book, it will be that feeling of isolation, not made by alienation or purposeful withdrawal from activities social, that is the precursor to a later feeling of enlightenment, that is at peace, with room to think, being clear headed about things, not become a depository of guilts and issues of another to be read through your own voice or lens, configure you to be someone who has not yet experienced what it means to be used, played, dumped, or ignored, I think Im much cooler now, so lets not go there. If a man loves you but cannot be with you, that doesn’t mean that there is anything wrong with you, it just means the timing is not right, or the future of your relationship is not laid out in plain sight, one or other going through something upon meeting the other, that just means upon reflecting one anothers interests, one feels healed, and if both don’t feel motivated, that can be a reason for a loss of contact with someone who you wanted to be with, but were not yet in a place in life, where you felt available to give your undivided attentions to another. Undivided attention is also known as monogamy, its by your focus on another that they feel loved, responded to, cared for, that’s another feeling like their needs are being met, and its by your individual attentions to another, is what makes you a good friend or companion, a person who they feel a sense of stability from, that’s what I call love. -This is why I write instead. 


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