It’s in your best interests to stay as far away on the outskirts of subjects unless you are directly affected, and this is what an entertainment campaign is all about, its about allowing people to think about things they enjoy putting together as a reference for appreciating the art of bringing life to life, and the people who represent what a meaningful life should look like and feel like, they are the standard, they are who feels good, and they are who we are proud of, and happy to represent ourselves and our feelings in life, they bring life to reality in a way, that doesn’t get us bogged down in controversy, or any politics, they make us feel good about subjects, not make us feel bad about how we feel.

If you ever find yourself in the epicenter of emotions and feelings or concerns, then you are probably like me, who gets in the thick of it, when things are not right, and what’s to figure out what’s going wrong, what has gone wrong, and how to make things better. I assure you there are few guides that can tell you whether you are strong enough as person to oversee things in life, or whether you would be too challenged by the big picture overall. I think everyone is adjusting well to things, death, dying, drug abuse, alcoholism, these are all things that will bring us pain in life, to see, watch, and witness others go through, its hard to see someone fail in good health, and patient for their recovery, the same goes for mental health issues, there will be days you will not feel well, and days when you will feel better. The challenge is staying motivated to get well, what else have you got to focus on in life, it’s something that should make you feel good about being you, figuring out what makes you feel well.

Right now is challenging because when so much goes wrong, it’s hard to think of what to say, or broach the subject of whether any culture plays a role in being deserving of such hardship, I don’t think any culture is responsible for the hardships they face, I think its about feeling good around who you are among, why to put family first, without whom, where can a sense of stability be reached. People will come into your life, from all walks of life, and as a blogger I am no stranger to that, I will always be me no matter who comes into my life, or tries to destroy my life, I think this year 2022 was a year of proving myself in spite of a negative diagnosis that was shocking and disheartening, and very frustrating to get through on meds be compliant about. I feel like there is this rush in life if disabled to be close to people and to open up, I feel most comfortable on my blog, time is an issue, as people age, so do we, so figure out where in that time between focusing on yourself and others, you stand in terms of your priorities, and live for what is right, and what feels good, and don’t be so diminished by what goes wrong. Lifes not an inherited failure, nor by politics should problems be inherited, its all a matter of perspective, whether you need to be told how things should be to agree, or whether on your own you know how things should be and can create a life for yourself that measures up to the ideal that you wish to live. We all have different ideals in life, and expectations.

I was finally able to get a paid job this year, after spending more than a year on Invega, which interrupted my thinking, and made it difficult to work for 6hrs at a time, or blog, I would get headaches and throw up in the first weeks of work, and got nightmares and had trouble sleeping on the meds, kept waking up. Im the type of person who only feels good when I have a life and am doing things with my life that I feel good about, it’s hard for me to live life disabled on meds, I can’t function without day meds, I wont wake up and stay in bed all day sleeping, I still find myself in bed all day, and hard to get going and do things. Life is shocking, but it doesn’t need to be painful, we will all face different pressures in life, and negative pressure is the worst, it makes it the hardest to come back to life, when faced with negative pressure or heat, its not a force that you can combat, its like things perpetually go sour for you, it’s like people are over you before you have been given a chance, and that’s not being well enough to work, you may impress but you cannot sustain your health, you may perform, but you cannot convince voices that you are doing well and to be left alone. Schizophrenia is a condition, when you are constantly faced with a pressure, its like being put in a time cooker, nothing feels settled, everything is moving fast, nothing is just right, and the day goes by, without remembering it, that’s being pushed in the fast forward position, and that’s what happens when you get hurt or shocked, its like you are living life, but you cant remember anything, its like wandering around life headless, where you can either let voices happen to you and destroy you, or you can be a writer and speak. So for me writing is my therapy, not to be overcome with negativity, and treated as though I’ve done something wrong, not be treated like my condition is hard for someone else to understand, my condition is hard to be in my body, and live life this way in constant pain, headaches and body aches, and just a few days ago pulled my lower back out, after sneezing, I don’t know how that happened. 

For the past two days, I have been on heat pads for my neck and back, and using a chair massage on my bed, sitting upright, to fix my lower back pain, it has hurt to walk, and to sit, to pick up things, and to move, and have been in bed the past few days in recovery, until I can do treadmill again and keep up with my weight loss, and doing arm weights. So I am doing my best. Keep busy, but don’t let your mind run out of order and all crazy over things, there is nothing that can be done in the event that something happens, it already happened, whats more important is moving forward, how are you going to process things so that you don’t become upset and hurt by anothers failure to stay center and regulate their own emotions and feelings, whos fault is that? Everyone has access to doctors on apps and meds there is no excuse for complaining or taking out your mental health issues on others. There is no excuse for someone on meds to made fun of in public as though that’s how you communicate to a crowd in secret, Im not an underground campaign, I am related to a celebrity, who has lived a good life an academician, who put out and dated and gets picked, graduated, and now gets jobs, Im a good person, I am not a joke or an embarrassment to our Country, I am someone to be remembered who worked hard and defended others, and put the needs of others before my own, I am a giving person, I write online for free for 10 years. That’s means I have drive, discipline, and goals in life, to help others, that means I am working on myself so that I am able to help others, that doesn’t mean that Im mentally ill, it just means that there were no jobs in writing, that I had access too, so they are not able to pay me for my work. That’s meeting the world, you meet them with money, no money, in a down, when youre up, or however you are when you get there, and then you grow as a person. How you grow and evolve as a person, is of value to people online, because many when they get started are intimidated, and with mental health issues run rampant, its seems like it was just another opportunity to make an inappropriate joke about things, so that everyone thinks just one thing dumb or simple and compares two people, me to Kim Kardashian, so that I am viewed as fake or imitation or unimportant or not real, or considerate, to make her feel offended and bothered that that was done to me, and at my expense of going everywhere in the world and be spoken to like Im stupid, and ghosted, as though how one man treats me is how everyone should treat me man or woman, like I am some disease or poor opportunity in life, or a risk of danger to their reputation. If I had a bad reputation I would not be able to bolster the reputation and good health of a man who comes to love me, why they are better off having met me, who then become angry at me, and don’t need me, that means that Im a catch, if they improve after having me in their life, a keeper.