As someone who is overweight and has difficulty maintaining beauty and femininity even with my body type, there are many ways to love yourself, love what you’re doing in life, and make a good life for yourself in spite of your odds, and still get picked for dating and jobs. I think I’m a good example of that. 

According to psychologytoday.com, “there are still many ways for people to confront self-criticism and develop a strong sense of self.” (1) This article was on self hatred. Strong terminology, but I don’t know what else to describe voices self harm by. It’s either apart of you gone wrong that is getting vocalized by who you think is talking about you directing negative terms toward you deserved or not. So think first what do I deserve in life and based on what you are doing and thinking think so I deserve to be called that and why, and what can I do, what changes can I make in life to not look like that and not be called that in life. Sometimes this is what changes people, eventually who do you become if you allow what people think or what you think people think to mold you into a person who simply doesn’t get called things you think others are thinking. 

For example, I blog to many people age range around my age. I’m 37. I got started in my 20s writing online now I would be considered a senior blogger in the online community having self published for 10 years experience with mental health issues and what to say what not to say and how you can get sick based on what you are saying. I think things are too late when you allow the negative to take hold, the more time you spend articulating the negative the less time you have to be yourself and speak in the positive. It’s like here you are sounding this way then you respond to it say it and it makes you sound like them “the negative voices” then the negative voices sound like you then you don’t feel good because you sound like them. So at what point is there a mutual understanding of things that there will be things said disagreed upon and not liked and how forgiving should we be of those who are made to describe things being done to them if done in the wrong how do you undo what is said wrong to you how do you say things right again. 

Reference:

(1) https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/self-hatred?amp